A Book Dedicated to Our Youth

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Under the repeated urging of Wavelet, I started to write in a hurry. Considering that the wavelet belongs to the dragon, I spent three days combining the dragon totem of China and the fire dragon of the west to draw a flying dragon with wings, driving the fog in the vast sky, but the wings were nailed by a sword, and the cloud around the dragon All dyed blood red.

A Jian saw the pattern and said cautiously: "The pattern is very large, I am afraid it will be divided into many times, otherwise the body will not be able to bear it."

Xiaobo lay on the folding bed and said, "I'm not in a hurry, you write slowly."

I sat on the sofa on the side, staring at A Jian and stabbed the first stroke on his clean back. I wanted to go, but Xiaobo stopped me: "Qiqi, stay with me."

I walked back, moved a small bench, sat in front of him, and asked, "Does it hurt?"

"a little bit."

I took his hand and he closed his eyes. I watched the pattern unfold a little bit on his back in silence.

When I was drawing the pattern, Xiaobo had been very anxious to urge it, it seemed that he wanted to tattoo the tattoo immediately, but when it was really drawn, he was not at all anxious. Sometimes, he could draw a little more, and he let Ajian take the job And continue tomorrow.

Because he paid very well, he paid every day, and A Jian was more happy to paint for a few days, but no matter how slow, after a month, all the thorns were finished.

A Jian looked at the broken-wing flying dragon on the back of Xiaobo with a sense of accomplishment: "I have been tattooing people since I was 16 years old. This is the best tattoo I have ever made."

Wavelet asked me, "Qi Qi, what do you think?"

"well."

After all, boys are different from girls. A Jian may not have studied painting formally, but he has talents. After his re-creation, the dragon added a little bit of pride to the world, but the **** wings are also terrible.

A Jian asked Xiaobo expectantly: "Why not look for a big mirror."

Xiaobo got up and put on clothes while saying, "There will be time to watch slowly."

He took me to eat mutton skewers. After the mutton skewers were finished, it was already setting in the west. We strolled on the tree-lined road. He suddenly said, "Qiqi, let's cut it off!"

I suspected that my ears were wrong, and looked at him in surprise. He smiled and said, "We will never be friends, and we will never be friends again and never go back and forth."

The sunset reflected all around with red light, and there was a sweet floral fragrance in the air. His smile was calm and gentle. Everything was the same as the countless summer evenings we spent together in the past. I laughed and beat him. ! "

He smiled and opened his hand: "Would you like to hug it for the last time?"

I smiled and said: "It turned out to be an excuse to make me want to take advantage of me? I won't hug you!"

He did not allow me to refuse. He took me into his arms and hugged him tightly. I smiled and hugged him. He said quietly in his heart, "Everything will be okay, everything will be okay."

After a long, long time, he let go of me and said with a smile: "Send you home."

I punched him with a smile: "I'm going to make a good excuse next time."

The two walked happily, still as usual, still some distance away from my house, he stopped, and I waved with him: "I will come to you tomorrow."

He stood in the sunset, staring at me, smiling quietly.

I quickly ran forward, and when I was about to turn in front of the building, I turned back and waved to him. I couldn't see his expression. I only saw the evening sky glowing red sky, and his long body was bathed in orange light.

The next day, I went to the cabaret to find Xiaobo. The people in the cabaret told me: "Bobo no longer manages the cabaret. He has to manage other businesses."

"Then where is he now?"

"do not know."

I stared at him in disbelief. He said apologetically: "Bobo wants us to tell you that he doesn't want to see you again. Please don't come again. All Bobo's business will not allow you to enter in the future."

I asked aloud: "Did you make a mistake? This is Luo Qiqi!"

He just looked at me sympathetically. His eyes were like seeing countless women who were suddenly flew away by their boyfriends but still refused to accept reality. My self-esteem was hurt and I turned away.

Walking and walking, yesterday scenes replayed in front of my eyes, I suddenly started shaking, crouched on the ground, wavelet is not kidding! He really wants to cut off with me!

But why? What am I doing wrong?

I rode a bicycle to the "on the water" side, the gatekeeper saw me and bombarded directly, I forced to enter, was pushed to the ground by them, and warned me if they wanted to break in again, they would notify me Parents and school.

People who came and went looked at me, and my tears were twirling in my eyes, but I could not stand standing up, hiding aside, sitting on the ground and waiting.

When it was getting dark, I saw a familiar motorcycle approaching, and I ran over immediately. Someone stopped me, and I yelled, "Xu Xiaobo, you have made it clear, where did I offend you?"

He didn't even look back. He handed the motorcycle to the younger brother to stop. While taking off his helmet, he walked into the ballroom.

In the flashing neon, I finally couldn't hold back, and the tears began to chuckle.

Brother Li's car was parked aside. He rolled down the window and told the man who was still pushing me out: "You first let go."

I looked at him with tears in my eyes, he said: "Qiqi, don't come to see us again in the future, you know the character of Xiaobo. Once he makes up his mind, even the nine-headed cow can't come back. In the future, it will be our business. The scene will not allow you to enter, all the brothers have to die. "

Brother Li started to close the window and gestured for the driver to drive. I cried and asked, "Why?"

"Qiqi, you and we are not on the same road, you have your own way to go."

The window was closed and Li's car drove away.

I kept crying. I'm not on the same road as you? Who am I on the same road with? I moved to this city at the age of seven. I met you at the age of nine. Now, six years have passed. Almost all places in the city were taken by Xiaobo on a bicycle. Almost all the memories of this city are related to you. You are now Tell me, you and I are not on the same road!

I have n’t been to Xiaobo again because I know that he said that the best friend is the best friend. Even if I cried to death, he would n’t look at me again, just like at the pond when he recited English, regardless of me How to make trouble, he said he would ignore me, he would never ignore me.

After breaking off with Xiaobo, I suddenly became a person with no friends and nowhere to go.

My sister is practicing the keyboard every day at home. I think she is noisy. She thinks that staying at home interferes with her. I asked her to close the door to practice the piano. Why not go out and find friends to play with? "

It turned out that I was often not at home, and this family was not used to my existence anymore, so I had to wear shoes to go out.

With pocket money, I bought a pack of inferior cigarettes and sat by the river to smoke.

The river is exactly the same as before, but everything has changed.

On a very hot and quiet summer day, I was sitting under the big sun, smoking a cigarette slowly, remembering that I was lying on the sofa with Xiaofei one year ago, talking about the future whisperingly , Discussing whether Tsinghua University or Peking University is good; I also went to the lotus pond with English every morning to recite English and study homework together.

When I think of it, there is a distant and unreal feeling, but it turns out to be only one year. Why is the whole world unrecognizable in just one year?

Thinking of the long three years of high school, I suddenly felt very tired and began to really understand Lin Lan ’s decision to study in secondary school, but I was tired and unable to support it, so I wanted to end quickly and give myself a result.

I sat by the river day after day, smoking a pack of cigarettes, and made up my mind.

In the evening, after dinner, my parents and I said: "Don't go out to dance first, wait for me to finish the dishes, I want to discuss something with you."

My solemnity made my mom and dad sober. They all sat on the sofa and asked nervously, "What is it? You just say it, put the tableware in the kitchen first."

I said, "I don't want to go to high school anymore."

Dad's face changed, and his mother pressed his arm, suggesting he didn't worry, looking at me and asking, "Why?"

"There is no reason, I just don't want to study anymore. I want to go to work early. I can go to the technical school. I will definitely be able to pass the exam. I can work after two years."

Dad's face is green: "Although our family is not rich, we don't expect you to make money to support your family. Whether you want to study or not, you have to go to high school."

I said lightly: "You insisted on letting me go to high school, and I could only go to school. Who called you parents, and I was a daughter, I had to listen to you. But if I were to go to the technical school now, I could still take a test Good professional, if you do n’t agree, in a few years, I may not even be able to pass the technical school. "

Dad stood up sharply, his palm shoved over, and his mother hugged him and pushed him out: "You go out first, and Qi Qi and I will talk for a while."

My mother sat across from me, and I looked at her silently, thinking coldly that there would be no way for her to change my mind.

She thought for a long time before she began to speak: "I know you have been resenting us for sending you to my grandfather, and I always feel that we are biased and better for my sister, but you are all born to me, and the palms and backs are flesh. My father and I are the same in your heart, except that my sister is more lively and likes to talk, so we naturally communicate more with her; you are more silent, and refuse to tell us anything, so we communicate with you Naturally there will be less. Think about it for yourself. Did your mother make a mistake? When I was eating together every day, my sister would always tell us what happened in school, but you would not say anything. We asked you and wanted to communicate with you, You just pass it by saying "nothing". "

I am silent, is it that I was born with a strange and silent character?

"Actually, your dad and I don't have to worry about you more than your sister. Your sister did something wrong. We scolded her directly. She cried a lot, and hurriedly called her father and father the next day, never Will live with us, but what about you? You are stubborn and stubborn. If you say too much, you will be afraid of rebellion. If you do n’t say, you wo n’t be relieved.

In fact, I understand the truth. They do n’t love me. If they really do n’t love me, let me go directly to the technical school, and save me the trouble and money. Why bother to force me to go to high school? It's just that when it comes to specific trivial matters, there will be an unconscious bias, but no parents in the world will admit that they are biased. They think those are trivial trivia, but they don't know that the child's world is composed of countless trivia.

"Your grandpa and grandma are from a big family. Grandma went to a foreign school and speaks English. Grandpa is a famous engineer, but neither of their two daughters has received higher education. I was because my stepfather refused to leave. Education expenses, your aunt was not in harmony with your stepmother, took advantage of your grandfather to go to the field to inspect the project, and stolen the account book to hire a job, this is the pain of your grandfather's life, you listen to me and your aunt's name , You should know that your grandfather has high hopes for the two daughters, but we have let him down. He put his wish on you, and before leaving, he specifically left you more than 20,000 yuan and said it was for you Of the university tuition fees, told me to train you to go to university, and said that if you go to university, you must remember to visit him before his grave. "

No one talked to my grandfather for many years, and my tears fell one after another uncontrollably.

"More than 20,000 yuan is not a small sum right now, let alone a few years ago? Your grandma took advantage of your grandfather's illness and stole all the family's bankbooks. The grandfather had a very rough life, Your aunt and I do n’t want him to witness his loved ones fighting for inheritance, so he coaxed him to say that the money has been received. After your grandfather died, your aunt announced that she had given up half of the property that she should inherit, as long as you My grandfather ’s artwork and collection of books, I only took the copy of "Heavenly Dragon Sword" he copied. "Mom said when she was sad, she began to cry," You do n’t remember to hate your grandmother, she has no children, so she grabbed money and grabbed it very well. Jail, your aunt and I do n’t blame her. Although my father and I do n’t have much money, but as long as you can read it, we will provide you with pots and iron. You just need to remember what your grandfather thinks of you. ”

My mother wiped away her tears and said, "Although your grandfather really wants you to go to university, I don't want to force you. You are not too young this year. I'm a fifteen-year-old. At your age, I have entered the factory to work and have a seniority. It ’s been a year. Your father helped me unload coal on the railway to earn tuition for myself. I believe you should be able to think for yourself and make a decision. If you still decide to go to the technical school, I will convince your father to agree to go to the technical school , Will come to your grandfather's grave, I will explain to him clearly, it is my inability to be a mother, I let him down, it has nothing to do with you. "

My mother was crying, and I cried out of breath.

After the mother calmed down, she said, "Give you three days to consider, and give us the answer after thinking clearly."

I went back to my bedroom and lay on the bed holding "Yi Tian Tu Long Ji", and the tears were still flowing.

After thinking for a night, my grandfather's voice and smile were all in my mind.

In fact, I know very well that my mother's retreat is advancing. The next few words of her are totally stimulating me, but that is my grandfather's wish. This is the only way I can do my filial piety.

The next morning, I walked into the bedroom of my parents and said to them: "I decided to go to high school."

Mom and Dad let out a sigh of relief. Dad immediately went to the drawer and took a pen to me: "This pen is very expensive and was reserved for you. I discussed it with your mom, no matter what you learned. It seems that as long as you recognize yourself, we do n’t require you to be admitted to college. ”

There are two lines of bronzing on the fountain pen: Shushan has a road to the ground, and learning from the sea has no limits.

I held the pen in my hand: "Since I chose to go to high school, I will definitely go to college. I want to make a request."

"You said."

"I want to spend high school in my own way, and I want you to believe me and give me freedom."

My father looked at my mother, and my mother said, "No problem, we always believe in you. Besides, your father and I haven't restrained you so much. Look at the neighbor in this building, who manages girls like us?" It ’s your sister. I do n’t allow her to go home after ten o'clock, but you play outside until eleven o'clock. We will warn you at most. Your dad has always kept you as a boy in his heart, and he never wants to hold you back. Temperament. "

My dad said: "I came out half-worked and half-educated when I was 13 years old. I unloaded coal at a train station to finish school for myself. I believe my daughter has the ability to take responsibility for herself."

I nodded and turned and walked out of their bedroom. Although the knot was unraveled, the estrangement that had been formed for many years could not be melted. Probably I would never be like my sister. Coquettish, but ... this is enough.

The willows and poplars by the river are lush, the morning wind is cool and moist, and there is the fragrance of plants and trees.

I sat by the river, took off my shoes and soaked my feet in the water.

Close your eyes, all the memories seem to be in front of you.

At the age of five, he left his grandfather and returned to his parents.

At the age of six, he went to school in the army's children's school, and then quit school.

At the age of seven, she returned to school and met Xiaofei.

At the age of eight, I moved to this city and saw Zhang Jun.

At the age of nine, he bumped into Teacher Zhao, skipped class to the game machine room, and met Xiaobo.

At the age of ten, sitting at the same table with Chen Jin, he met Teacher Gao.

At the age of 11, Guan He transferred to our class.

At the age of twelve, Xiao Fei and I met again and met with Teacher Zeng Hong.

...

I used to think that this world gave me too little, but I really thought about it, how could I get less?

Xiao Fei's father has been beating her mother, she is facing a violent family; Guan He's father died very early, Guan He needs to be sent to the fence, to please his stepfather and brother and sister eloquently; Xiaobo's father died early, mother's mental disorder, The economy has always been embarrassing; although Lin Lan has both parents, he has to face the mother ’s embarrassing marital changes and bear rumours for her mother; Chen Songqing studies so hard, but because of the poor family, she has to bear the burden of the family early.

They are all strong and smiling, and me?

Mom and Dad have a harmonious relationship, tolerate me, and a grandfather who loves me so much. Although I lost my love from my parents in my childhood, I have precious memories with my grandfather. My sister will never know how big our grandfather is. The gentle gentle gentleman, she has what I don't have, but I also have what she doesn't.

When I was in elementary school, I had no classmates and was isolated by the whole class. But because of the isolation, I knew Xiaobo and the squids. What wavelet gave me was that a thousand classmates did not add up to one in 10,000.

Although I met the hateful teacher Zhao, I also met the teacher who cared for me; although I met the stingy cornucopia, I also met the bold Zeng Hong.

What is my reason to be cynical? What is the point of violent self-abandonment?

I threw all the unsmoked cigarettes into the river with a lighter, and watched them be taken away by the river. Yesterday everything was cut off!

I stood up, a brand new beginning, not only for myself, but also my grandfather, parents, wavelet, Xiao Fei, Gao Gao, Zeng Hong ... People not only live for themselves, but also for people who love themselves .