Bite Your Fingertips

Chu Yu was lying on the bed, tossing about and couldn't sleep. Wrapped tightly in the quilt, closed his eyes and brewed, not only did not fall asleep, but on the contrary, he became more and more awake.

It was raining outside the window with a dense rustling sound. Usually Chu Yu would not notice, but tonight he found it particularly annoying.

It's so noisy.

Chu Yu pulled the quilt up and suddenly covered his head.

He remembered Lu Shi standing up, opening the bedroom door and letting him go back first. The scene of sleeping on his own tonight, suddenly tightened the quilt.

If I sleep by myself, I sleep by myself. In the past ten years, I slept by myself.

My heart seemed to be blocked by wet cotton wool, suffocated and uncomfortable.

He pulled the quilt down again, showing only his eyes, staring at the wall.

On the other side of this wall, there is Lu Shi.

Chu Yu himself couldn't figure out what was in his heart, so he felt sad.

He felt that he was hypocritical.

Lu Shi was very alienated and indifferent to others, or he was quick and fierce.

But although Lu Shi didn't say much to him, and didn't show much, Chu Yu was sure that Lu Shi really withdrew his defenses and barriers and let him rely on him.

Lu Shi was cold and difficult to understand, but he was really good to him.

But maybe because of this, Chu Yu felt so sad.

Before he said anything, Lu Shi pushed him out of the dormitory and closed the door.

Lu Shi didn't trust him.

Turning over, Chu Yu changed his posture instead of staring at the wall. Instead, he stared at the Strelitzia by the window. Then he found that he couldn't remember how long he hadn't watered it. Lu Shi was taking care of it.

He turned his gaze to the desk and shelf, everything was neatly packed.

I don't know when Lu Shi would help him tidy up the pen-and-paper comic books he misplaced.

At this time, Chu Yu went around to look, only to find out what it means to moisten things silently, what means to be silent and deep, inch by inch, Lu Shi is.

I have even arrived. I always want to grab the corners of my clothes when I land, and I don’t have anything in my hands. I feel like I’m not used to it.

Chu Yu knew that no matter who he faced, he would subconsciously draw the line clearly. In the bottom of his heart, he was afraid, afraid that he would trust someone wholeheartedly and ask for emotions from someone, and in the end he would get no response.

Like his mother.

He has always protected himself very well.

But when he landed, his boundary was like drawn with light smoke, and when a small breeze blew, it cleared. He even took a step forward on his own initiative, telling Lu Shi that you can take a little bit more.

Clean up what you sell.

I'm so angry when I think about it this way!

But no matter how angry, it will only take a second or two.

Chu Yu was wronged again—I sold myself so clean, what do you think of me, Lu Shi?

I didn't sleep well all night in a daze, had a series of dreams, woke up, and didn't remember half of the picture.

Chu Yu sullenly changed his clothes, stuffed the warm baby into his pocket, and went to the classroom.

When I went downstairs, I just ran into Brother Meng. Brother Meng held a glass bottle in his hand, bitter and bitter.

Chu Yu was curious, "What's your expression? Your face is almost wrinkled."

Brother Meng shook the glass bottle in his hand, "My mother gave it, bird's nest. Do you know what a bird's nest is? The swallow's saliva. I think about it, I can make up for it. What!"

"Auntie asked you to drink bird's nest tonic?" Chu Yu thought, "Do you want you to... nourish your yin and beauty?"

"Hey, it makes sense! Sure enough, one more person has one more IQ!" Brother Meng was awakened, "School flower, you say that, it is really possible!" He looked around, no acquaintance, whispered, "I I went back this weekend and was scammed by my mother and found out that I have someone I like. I thought I would be doubled by my parents, but I didn't expect my mother to be anxious to death."

"What's in a hurry?"

"I'm anxious about my looks. If I can't catch up with girls, I will be disgusted. I also said that many girls today don't like my burly and muscular models, and they like the kind of beautiful men!"

Meng Ge wondered, "You said, is it because of this that my mother let me eat bird's nest to maintain my beauty?"

Chu Yu felt that the logic was all right.

The two of them were puzzled. Brother Meng happily finished the bird's nest and remembered, "Eh, it's not right, the school girl, Lu Shen, why didn't you join you today?"

Chu Yu managed his expression well, and naturally replied, "Why can't you not be with me anymore?"

"Isn't it weird that Lu Shen is not with you, it's amazing. You and Lu Shen are about to stick together, but whenever you or Lu Shen are a woman, Lao Ye will have to talk to you."

Chu Yu didn't react, "Talk? What are you talking about?"

"Puppy love!"

Brother Meng sighed long, "Oh, I actually want Lao Ye to talk to me. I want to fall in love early, I want to hold hands, I want to send the first kiss that I have treasured for more than ten years, but I have no chance!"

Chu Yu was a little lost.

Brother Meng was still talking, "Speaking of which, the girl I liked yesterday asked me to go to the grove. I was worried for a long time and did a lot of mental construction for myself. Unexpectedly, she gave me a serious I talked about the derivative for an hour!"

A psychedelic smile appeared on Brother Meng's face, "But I like her more and more. When she tells me some knowledge, her voice is so good!"

Chu Yu was a little restless.

He sat down, the back table was still empty, and Lu Shi did not come.

Zhang Yueshan is arguing with Li Hua about the solution to the last question of the midterm exam. By the way, he said with emotion, "I almost didn't finish the question!"

Li Hua replied, "This time the math paper is very difficult. I did it slowly. The last two questions were solved very urgently. I don't know how many points I can get."

Brother Meng heard that they were having a modest conversation between school tyrants again, and quickly slipped back to his seat.

Chu Yu held his chin with his hand, and waited for the previous topic to come to an end before asking Zhang Yueshan, "Squad leader, what do you think... how is the relationship between Lu Shi and I?"

"You? The relationship is very good!"

"Then...Squad leader, who do you have the best relationship with?"

Zhang Yueshan stretched out his hand to pat Li Hua's shoulder, "Of course I'm at the same table! We are the people who have heard each other's teeth talking in sleep!"

Li Hua pulled out an English paper to write, and opened Zhang Yueshan's hand disgustingly, "Don't make a noise, I'm writing to myself!"

Chu Yu asked again, "Then... If one day, you are eating out together, and a girl comes to Li Hua for contact information, how do you... feel?"

Zhang Yueshan thought about it, "Is that girl pretty?"

"Pretty."

"Of course it's my brother, hurry up! Chong! It's not easy for someone to see you. I will help you find 18 ways to chase girls, 50 dating, and so on. I must recite it!"

Suddenly Chu Yu was lost.

Zhang Yueshan's reactions and thoughts are normal, right?

However, after having a barbecue that day, a girl came to find Lu Shi for contact information. He was relieved when he heard Lu Shi refused.

Zhang Yueshan was keen, "School flower, are you in conflict with Lu Shi?"

Chu Yu shook his head, "No."

Zhang Yueshan breathed a sigh of relief, "That's good!"

Lu Shi didn't come to study until early morning.

Chu Yu looked at the door of the classroom frequently, but no one came in.

Zhang Yueshan came back from the office and told Chu Yu the latest news, "Lu Shen asked for leave."

Chu Yu was taken aback, "Have you asked for leave? I...I don't know."

"It's estimated that it happened quite suddenly." Zhang Yueshan said in detail, "Lao Ye told me that there should be something urgent for Lu Shen. Yesterday at 3 o'clock in the morning, I left the school overnight. Lao Ye was worried about whether his house was out. What major event, when asked if he wanted to be with him, Lu Shen didn't say anything, so he refused."

Under the table, Chu Yu hooked the strap of the schoolbag with his fingers, and asked in a quiet voice, "How long have you been pleased?"

"It seems to have been invited for two days. By the way, the mid-term exam papers are almost finished, and the ranking can be ranked at noon today. There is no need to guess. Lu Shen is definitely first, but I don't know who can get second this time."

Chu Yu actually didn't hear what Zhang Yueshan was saying. Those voices got into the ears and couldn't pass the brain. He grasped the strap of the schoolbag with his fingers, feeling empty in his heart.

Lu Shi got off the bus when the sky was bright. After looking for the address for a long time, I finally arrived at the destination.

In the old community 20 or 30 years ago, the bicycle was parked on the aisle, the ginkgo tree grew tall, the leaves were about to fall, only a few pieces were left on the branches.

Lu Shi climbed the stairs to the third floor, raised his hand, and knocked on the door after a few more seconds.

After a while, the door opened and it was an old lady. She held the reading glasses and asked Lu, "You are the caller?"

Lu Shi nodded, "It's me, sorry, I'm bothering you."

The old lady pushed the door open a bit, let Lu Shi come in, and said, "No need to change shoes, I'm packing my luggage, the plane in the afternoon is messy everywhere, this place is probably not as clean as your shoe soles!"

Lu Shi followed in and closed the door with his backhand.

The old lady washed the enamel cup, poured water, and handed it to Lu Shi.

Seeing Lu Shi’s eyes fell on the black-and-white photo frame, he said, “My wife and son have been there for half a year, and my son and daughter immigrated a few years earlier. They are not assured that the old woman, I am alone in China, let me go abroad. I can’t bear it. I'm afraid that if my wife's soul comes back, and wandering around in this old house, what should I do if I can't be found?

But I fell a few days ago, but it made the child anxious. I wondered, let's go and take the old man's picture with me while he is with me. "

Lu Shi listened quietly.

The old lady combed her sideburns neatly. She collected her emotions, "When people are old, I always like to say that there are none, just laughed. Are you still studying?"

"Well, high school."

The old lady nodded, "You come here, what do you want to ask me?"

Lu Shi took out a photo-encrusted pendant from his bag, opened it, and there were two photos inside. One is an ID photo, the other is the same woman in it, I don’t know where it was cut.

"She looks a bit like you, who is she?"

"It's my mother."

Lu Shi asked, "Excuse me, do you have an impression of her?"

The old lady took the pendant and looked carefully through the reading glasses.

It took a long time to say, "If you come to ask someone else, I don't think I have any impression. But this person, I still remember something."

She recalled, "I remember this girl clearly. My husband and I worked in clinics. At that time, those who had no such good conditions and could not go to the hospital to have children had to come to us.

The first time I saw her, she came over with a big belly and said that she was going to knock the baby out. At that time, she was eight months pregnant, how to fight? It's too dangerous. If you don't pay attention, you will die.

We asked her, what about your husband? She just cried. "

"and after?"

"Later, the girl left, only two days later, she came back. I still told us that she wanted to induce labor. I persuaded her that you are so beautiful, and you don't know how beautiful you are when your baby is born.

But she saw that she was in a very bad state of mind, so I thought that there might be some difficulties. Finally, I said, you think about another night, if you still want to induce labor, come over tomorrow. "

"She came over early the next morning. We explained all the possible dangers to her. The girl nodded and lay on the operating bed. The tears kept flowing, hitting the hair on the temples. Wet.

When my husband started disinfecting, she suddenly sat up and ran outside with her belly in her arms, crying and shouting, saying no, no, don’t hurt her child. "

Lu Shi's throat hurts.

The old lady was full of sorrow when she said it.

"It's been more than a month. In the middle of the night, she knocked on the door of the clinic and her head was sweaty. When I saw that she was about to give birth, I quickly helped her in and lie down. She was in terrible pain, but The child just won't come down, poor, he hasn't been born even after dawn.

I boiled an egg for her, and she ate it, took my hand and told me that if there is a shortcoming, she must protect the child. "

The old lady returned the pendant to Lu Shi.

Lu Shi opened his mouth and spoke without making a sound.

He unconsciously pulled back his strength, clenched the pendant tightly, and felt pain from the palm of his hand. Then he dumbed his voice and said, "How is she after giving birth?"

"Very good. Although she was tortured when she was born, she didn’t suffer any more sins since then. She was holding the baby, crying and laughing. She laughed so beautifully. During the first few days of her confinement, I went to see it. Yes, teach her how to coax the child to sleep."

The old lady recalled carefully, "Later...Later, she moved away before her confinement. Whether she moved away, I guess, it was because of the rumors of neighbors in the neighborhood. Don’t you know, those people are used to Can chew the roots of the tongue, and can smash a person's spine!"

Chu Yu was studying at night and was called by the head teacher, Ye Ye, to talk about his life in the office. The main reason was that his test scores this time had dropped a little bit compared with the last time.

The English is very competitive, and he stays at the second grade, and his results in other subjects are pretty miserable.

Chu Yu had a good attitude, sat upright, and listened carefully to Old Ye Nian until the bell rang until the end of get out of class. Back to the classroom, carrying an empty schoolbag, Chu Yu slowly squeezed the elevator downstairs and returned to the dormitory.

Passing by Lu Shi's door, he knocked on the door, and there was no sound inside.

Chu Yu dropped his wrists, stood for a while, and went back to his bedroom.

He rarely took the key.

The rain stopped, but it was wet and cold, and Chu Yu stepped barefoot on the carpet and went to close the window.

The cold air is isolated.

Chu Yu took out his mobile phone and sat on the carpet to play games.

I couldn't help but remember what Lu Shi said yesterday.

In his mind, repeating the game again and again, the more he thought about it, the more he felt that Lu Shi was deliberate.

Deliberately let him discover, deliberately let him hear.

Even if he didn't accidentally press the play button yesterday, Lu Shi would find another chance and let him listen.

Then told him that he was monitoring Fang Weiyun's phone.

The character manipulated on the screen died again, and the screen stopped. Chu Yu was about to cut out when the phone rang.

The name displayed on the screen is Lu Shi.

After blinking a few more times, he found that the phone's ringing was still ringing, and then Chu Yu answered the call, "Hello?"

Passing through the narrow alley and stopping in front of a small door, Chu Yu took a breath—

Lu Shi brought him here once, to borrow a heavy locomotive, he barely remembered the way.

After standing for a while, the door opened and Lu Shi walked out of it.

In just one day, Chu Yu felt that Lu Shi... seemed to be different.

Standing in place, watching the neon flashing light on the roof fall, Chu Yu was a little nervous, shouting, "Lu—"

The voice was only halfway through, and he was hugged by Lu Shi.

Lu Shi was very hot, his body was faintly drunk, his arms were like chains, and he held him tightly in his arms.

Chu Yu didn't dare to move and wanted to ask you what's wrong, but within two seconds, he noticed that Lu Shi's back was trembling slightly under his palm.

Something sticks to the skin on the side of the neck, it's wet.

Lu Shi was crying.

In Chu Yu's ear, Lu Shi's voice was hoarse, "She gave birth to me, but I killed her."

she was?

Chu Yu boldly guessed that she should be... Lu Shi's biological mother?

The train of thought was interrupted, and suddenly, Chu Yu was pushed against the wall behind him by Lu Shi.

The walls were cold and hard, and Chu Yu put on a thick dress when he went out, which acted as a cushion.

He subconsciously shouted, "Lu Shi—"

Lu Shi's eyes were dark, suppressing emotions that others couldn't understand.

Holding Chu Yu's chin with his fingers, Lu Shi stubbornly asked him to face his eyes.

Lu Shi's eyes were red, but Chu Yu noticed the wet eyelashes and the wet end of his eyes because of the tears.

My heart also became uncomfortable.

As if afraid that Chu Yu would say something to refuse or make him unhappy, Lu Shi covered Chu Yu's mouth with his hand, then leaned forward and leaned close to Chu Yu's ear, muttering maliciously.

"Chu Yu, my blood is so dirty, you sucked my blood and it became dirty with me."