Conan: I Am Not a Snake Spirit

Outside the room, Chi Feichi waited for a long time, found no movement in the room, turned around to the door to check the situation, and saw Hui Yuanai sitting by the bed, looking down at Bao in a daze, "Xiao Ai?"

Haibara regained consciousness and raised his head subconsciously.

(??﹏??)

It was the same way when the godmother left last time.

And this time we spend a little longer together, and that feeling is stronger...

Chi Feichi observed Hui Yuanai's aggrieved face, and fell silent for a while, "Do you miss your mother?"

Only then did Hui Yuan Ai realize that he might have forgotten to manage his expressions well, and he didn't really want to admit that he actually 'missed his mother', but when he thought about Chi Feichi in front of him, he let out a muffled 'hmm'.

Brother Feichi should understand her...

The next second, Hui Yuan Ai stared at the phone that Chi Feichi took out, and asked speechlessly, "What are you doing?"

Chi Feichi looked at Hui Yuanai's normal expression on the phone, and regretted putting away the phone, "Your expression just now is rare, it's a pity."

The speed at which he pressed the camera button was actually a little slower. It was all because he helped Hui Yuanai carry the schoolbag, which affected his performance and failed to take pictures for collection.

Hui Yuanai was speechless for a moment, lowered her head and zipped up the bag containing her clothes, stood up and carried it, looked at Chi Feichi with a dark face, "Let's go."

Fortunately, she still thought that Brother Feichi would understand her feelings, and they could hug each other to keep warm. She never expected that what Brother Feichi thought of was to take pictures of her embarrassing appearance...

There is no worse brother than this!

Chi Feichi turned around and led the way out without any guilt at all for ruining the atmosphere, and was still regretting not being able to take that photo.

Such a pitiful version of Hui Yuan Ai's photo, if I miss this time, my little sister will be prepared, maybe there will be no next chance...

Feeling wrong.

All the way to the parking lot, Hui Yuanai put her bag in the back seat, got in the car, and watched Chi Feichi get into the driver's seat, "Are you teaching me experience?"

On the way down the elevator, she thought about why.

Before meeting Chi Kanai, she didn't realize that she could miss someone so much, and she was lost as soon as the other party left.

Her sister is probably because she gets together less and leaves more, and occasionally gets together to share life in a hurry, or it may be that she has been leaving that one all the time.

As a male, Dr. Ali is sometimes not as delicate as Chi Kanai, and she is always there. She has never experienced Dr. Ali's sudden departure and no return date, so she has never thought about Dr. Ali.

Brother Feichi... When we first met, she missed Dr. Ali, and when she called her sister's rented place, but as she got to know him, she found that Brother Feichi was often active in By my side, I want to see you today, you can make an appointment by sending a message, and you don't live far away, and slowly, you won't miss you too much when you separate.

From this point of view, there are two reasons why Chi Kanai feels depressed every time he leaves her.

One is that from her godmother, she felt wholehearted care and care, even if it was only temporarily lost, it would make people feel uncomfortable and lost, and her godmother seemed to have a kind of magical power, no matter where she was, she could radiate warmth, not hot enthusiasm, but Being able to conquer a person's heart without knowing it, being loved by such a person makes my heart feel warm every day, and when that person leaves suddenly, the temperature of the air drops also makes people feel at a loss.

The second reason is that she does not have any sovereignty in the 'gathering and parting'.

Whether it was with her sister in the past, or now with the doctor and Brother Feichi, she has the right to choose, and Chi Kanai will fly from city to city, the distance between each other is too far and cannot be determined, and Chi Kanai still has things to do at hand , is also full of uncertainties in time.

She doesn't have any sovereignty, so she is destined to be the one who misses more.

So, does Brother Feichi really not understand her mood?

No, Brother Feichi should feel more deeply than her about this kind of matter.

She should be the one who can only feel part of it but not all of it.

She had heard from her godmother that before the age of five, Brother Feichi lived with his parents. That was five years. The godmother has been together many times this week, so after the godmother leaves, the kind of miss should also be doubled, doubled, and doubled.

Her real age is eighteen, not a child anymore. She has seen and experienced many things in the organization over the years, and she is open to reunions and partings. Brother Feichi at that time was also a five-year-old child .

The departure of parents, facing the house where parents seem to be everywhere, but the air is so cold, waiting passively, that kind of longing... no, it should be pain, and that pain will be stronger Many times.

In addition, after being disturbed by Chi Feichi so much, she walked out of her depressed mood. Thinking about it, she didn't feel so uncomfortable anymore. Brother Feichi back then, it seemed that no one helped him get out of this mood.

Thinking of it this way, she felt so bored that she was about to suffocate. There were many questions she wanted to ask, but it seemed that she didn't need to ask any more, as she could think of the answer.

for example……

When you were thinking about it back then, when you found out that you didn't have any sovereignty, did you ever fear it? Have you ever been uneasy?

There must be, she is okay, she is eighteen years old anyway, she knows more, if she wants to be more willful, she can ask Dr. Ali to fly there, or hire someone to take her on a plane to find her godmother.

That's right, she knew that it was a flight, and she knew a lot of ways to deal with it. She didn't completely lose her sovereignty, but for a five-year-old child, there are still more unknowns in the outside world. Even the understanding of the world and the way to deal with things are still in an absolutely weak position.

Brother Feichi had no choice than her back then, absolutely helpless and frustrated, followed by fear and uneasiness.

Are you desperate?

There should be, long-term expectations are not met, long-term fears and anxiety are not appeased, if even prayers and entreaties are fruitless, you must be very desperate.

Have you resisted?

Even if a five-year-old child can't tell what the injustice is, if he can't pray, he will definitely notice it. When he realizes that he is so weak that he has no right to choose, he will resist.

Even the means of resistance, she can guess a thing or two. For a five-year-old child, it is probably crying, making mistakes, and responding in the most clumsy and irrational way.

Hate?

There must be.

Loss is painful, and if tenderness or security exacerbates that pain, then tenderness and security are also hated, including the mother who gave tenderness and the father who gave security .

In fact, there are still questions that she doesn't know the answer to.

What happens after resistance fails?

What now? Can you let go now?

She dared not ask.

She was worried that the emotion she had once had become a festering wound, out of control, wantonly polluting other places in her heart, and after cutting it open, she saw devastation that she couldn't bear.

Although Jack the Ripper in the Cocoon game is a game character, he is excellent in setting and intelligence.

Such a villain actually regarded Brother Feichi, whom he had known for a short time, as a friend, and later played a disastrous plot like "kill Professor Moriarty".

She didn't think much about it before, and thought that Brother Feichi could easily warm others up, or before his death, Hiroki Sawada guessed that Brother Feichi, a game fan, would definitely participate in the cocoon game experience, so he set it up for Brother Feichi in advance. 'Absolute Charm' Buff.

Thinking about it now, maybe it was because after Jack the Ripper talked with Brother Feichi about certain aspects, Jack regarded Brother Feichi as a friend who could understand him, or even another self.

In the game's London setting, Jack kills his mother who abandoned him, and the other victims are also targeted based on Jack's resentment towards his mother.

So, what about Brother Feichi?

If he didn't resent him so much that he wanted to kill someone, he probably wouldn't be able to understand Jack. If he didn't really understand, an executioner like Jack wouldn't be so easily deceived.

...Thinking carefully.

She didn't want to think so, but if it was the same as what she thought, it would be better to dilute the resentment first, and then open it up for treatment.

Moreover, not everyone is suitable for dissection and removal of pus. Brother Feichi's medical records are still kept in Qingshan Fourth Hospital.

Besides, if Brother Feichi doesn't want to reveal it, she won't have a chance...

...

Chi Feichi closed the car door, turned around and saw Hui Yuanai staring at him with complicated eyes, feeling puzzled, "What?"

Hui Yuanai returned to his senses, and said in a relaxed tone, "In the face of my mother's departure, how to quickly adjust my mood experience, is it to use other things to divert attention and quickly get out of that emotion?"

Chi Feichi started the car, backed out of the parking space, "You can try."

Is this an admission?

Hui Yuanai looked at Chi Feichi's calm side face, looked away, watched the car drive out of the parking lot, and decided to have a heart-to-heart talk with Chi Feichi, "Brother Feichi, did I tell you? My parents are here I passed away when I was very young. I used to see children crying because they missed their parents on TV programs. I thought, at least they still have their parents, at least they still care about them. They are not much luckier than people like me. Is it? Now I probably know how those children feel..."

Chi Feichi suspected that his little sister was extremely depressed today. He knew all about it. In the previous life, his parents left early, and he didn't understand those children's feelings. I think it is necessary to talk about it, "There is a saying in China, 'When parents are alive, there is still a place for life; Missing a part, I am more lonely, and I don’t seem to have so much confidence. And the American poet Emily Dickinson once said, 'I could have endured the darkness, if I had never seen the light, but now the sun shines on my loneliness even more Desolation', sometimes, having it and losing it is no easier than not having it at all..."

Haibara Ai:"……"

this……

She actually wanted to express to Brother Feichi that there are still many people envious of people with parents, so it's not that bad, everyone is envious of each other.

But Brother Feichi actually seemed to understand better than her.

And these two sentences are too good, she likes it very much...

Chi Feichi continued, "Both feelings are not hypocritical. Only those who are in them can understand clearly, know the pain in them, and yearn for another life at the same time, but the beauty of another life is completely imagined , the pain was ignored.”

Haibara Ai:"……"

That's right, it makes sense and makes people think deeply.