Dear Freud

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In the autumn city of HK, the sea breeze blows and the air is cool.

The morning light sprinkled over the city, a touch of golden color. On Friday morning, the streets are busy and full of hustle and bustle, people who get up early to work.

Zhen Yi drove the car, traveling through the streets of the city, outside the car window, the scenery flowing.

A lively tea restaurant, selling early stall cars, busy white-collar workers, closed high-end stores, and clothes drying in the alleys.

She held the steering wheel tightly, her eyes were alert, and looked around carefully and carefully, the man in the suit, the woman in the OL skirt, the child carrying the schoolbag, the woman in pajamas brushing her teeth.

What about speech, where did speech go?

Her car traversed the alley and hit the penny where people were hanging clothes, and the clothes and underwear were flying like a piece of paper.

The woman with toothpaste bubbles chased and scolded behind, and Zhen Yi didn't hear it. Her two dark eyes didn't blink for a moment, searching for the silhouettes of people around her through the window.

The day turned into night in her eyes, and the world turned into an empty city in her eyes, full of lights and neon lights. The roadside is full of humorous humor in the clubbing area.

She had a hunch that her words were dangerous, and they were beating him.

She is going to save him.

It's too late, and it's dark. Why can't I find words?

Zhen Yi shivered gently, hitting the steering wheel with one hand, and stuffed it into his mouth fiercely with one hand, teeth trembling, biting his finger, as if only in this way could restrain the deepest fear and uneasiness in the heart.

Where is the speech?

The red light in front flashes, is there a policeman on duty in the bar area?

Zhen Yi suddenly stopped the car, she was going to the police.

But, there was a piece of news on the car radio: "At 6:27 this morning, a building crash occurred in a serviced apartment building in Qingsha District. The deceased fell from the 13th floor and died on the spot. The police later proved that the deceased Huai Ru, a life-long prisoner who escaped unexpectedly last month "

On the steering wheel, Zhen Yi's hand slowly released. A set of pictures flashed in my mind like a film, and Huai Ru fell downstairs from her balcony.

She was expressionless and looked forward without moving.

The sight flashed and the colorful bar area disappeared at night. It is daytime and the traffic police are conducting routine inspections.

She lowered her eyes in silence, looked at the scars and blood on her hands, and tilted her head slightly puzzled. What are these? She didn't feel any pain at all.

She didn't quite understand it. She froze for a moment, remembering something, and suddenly grabbed the co-pilot's bag, and hurriedly opened it to see, a cold fruit sharp knife.

She felt relieved instantly.

In front, the inspected traffic police are slowly approaching, and the traffic is moving slowly. There was a car whistle in the back, and a shrill sound. Zhen Yi was taken aback and turned back. She saw the night and the arrogant crowd again in her eyes.

She immediately carried her bag, slipped out of the car, and jumped over the white bar in the middle of the road. The wind ran away in the car's sudden braking and cursing.

She forgot to dress and wear shoes when she went out, bare feet, only thin clothes. She ran all the way, fled the street, and the world returned to the bar area at night.

Everyone laughed on the side of the road, but no words.

She looked everywhere without a destination. The world was unfamiliar, cold and uneasy. She held her bag tightly and tremble in the wind. Looking around in a panic, where is the expression?

She ran to the square and looked up at the LED display, showing the scene of Huairu jumping from the building. Inside, the crowd was watching and calling on her cell phone.

Zhen Yi stood across the street and looked up at her neck. She saw her home, and white gauze curtains were flying.

She stopped and stared blankly, remembering to get up one morning to eat breakfast while holding her like a lazy worm. At that time, the wind was blowing on the gauze curtain.

Is she home?

No, she does not want to go home now, she is going to find words.

Just ready to go, but the camera flicked, and a man appeared in the corner, tall and thin, wearing a navy windbreaker in dark blue, the wind blowing the broken hair on his brow, revealing a white and full forehead.

He frowned deeply, very deep, very deep.

She stood across the street, staring blankly, as if thousands of mountains and rivers, she finally found him.

He didn't have an accident, which is great.

Holding the bag, she looked up at the LED display, walked over to it, and started running after a few steps:

Words, I'm here for you.

A sharp whistle sounded and a brake sounded.

Zhen Yi was hit hard and fell to the ground.

The driver drove his head in discontent: "You are sick!"

I met a woman who ran on the street with her head up in the morning. It was really unlucky. But at first glance, this woman with her hair disheveled, wearing only a short T-shirt, cotton pants, and bare feet, is it a neuropathy?

The driver shut up.

"You are sick!" This sentence echoed in Zhen Yi's ear. For another moment, Huairu's voice flashed in his ear: "Do you want to avenge speech?"

She hugged her bag and stared blankly at the sky. There were no words on the LED screen, only the yellow oranges in the promotional ads. In the pale blue sky, that brilliant.

The words were gone. He was arrested, and others will beat him.

Tears fell, and her heart was sore and cold, she lowered her head and turned back barefoot. As you walk, raise your arms and wipe your tears.

Her heart hurts, but she can't cry now. She is going to find words and revenge words.

She stopped a taxi, sat in, and said cautiously and cautiously: "The First Mental Hospital."

The driver was enthusiastic and chatted with her along the way: "Are you going to see someone? Is there a friend or family member? I have heard a few mentally joke, tell you?"

She didn't move, holding her bag firmly.

The car radio is broadcasting news: "The suspect in the Huairu falling into the building was initially locked as the lawyer Zhen Yi. Some witnesses said that after hearing the screaming of the deceased, he looked up and saw Zhen Yi pushing the deceased down the stairs

"Nonsense! How could Attorney Zhen kill?" The bold driver scolded the steering wheel, scolding.

Zhen Yi lowered her head, covered her face with her long hair, and shrunk in the back seat, unable to see her expression clearly.

"I heard on the radio that Mr. Zhen defended Officer Lin last month. My big man cried when he was pulling a guest." The driver was excited. "How can someone as good as Mr. Zhen kill? Huai Ru this The murderer was supposed to be damn, she must have escaped to kill Lawyer Zhen. Lawyer Zhen protects herself and defends herself! This pushed her downstairs. "

The driver chattered angrily, and Zhen Yi was still standing in the back seat without any movement.

Near the Jiujiang District, the sea breeze was getting bigger and bigger, and the tide flowed in from the window, blowing Zhen Yi's hair flying like ghost hands, making her breathing difficult, as if suffocating.

Finally at the mental hospital, she got out of the car. Take out her volunteer card from the bag and swipe it in.

People who are mentally ill are doing morning exercises on the lawn, and nurses and doctors are taking care of them. Normal people do not notice her. But a few mental patients came over.

Meimei squinted her eyes while waving her arms and said, "She and we are one country."

Gardenia also looked here and said, "There are two people."

Zhen Yi bowed her head all the way and walked very fast, hurried up the corridor to avoid anyone.

Soon, she saw the glass house again.

Li You was sitting inside and drinking tea leisurely. The sunlight fell diagonally from the patio. He was dressed in white and looked so clean, like the dust-free fairy grass in the glasshouse.

Zhen Yi bare feet, no footsteps at all; but he seemed to have sensed her appearance, and seemed to be waiting for her.

The tea in the cup just finished drinking.

He raised his head, and in the sunlight, his fair-skinned face seemed to be transparent, and his eyelashes were dyed with fine golden sunlight.

Huai Ru's voice sounded from his ear: "Zhen Yi, do you want to avenge your speech? I tell you who that person is."

It ’s him, it ’s him who puts his words

A man with such a beautiful look turned out to be

Zhen Yi looked empty and looked at him silently.

There was a long-standing accumulation of anger and severe pain that accumulated again and piled up. Her chest began to fluctuate violently, and her whole body blood seemed to nausea up, choked in her throat, and she would vomit and bleed.

"what!!!"

Zhen Yi suddenly screamed in despair and mourning sadly, heartbroken.

She had nowhere to vent her pain, strode forward, and slammed her palm against the glass house.

The glass wall swayed and calmed down.

Opposite the glass, Li You smiled faintly, and looked at her leisurely, like a cat looking at a crazy but tiny mouse.

Another punch! One after another.

Zhen Yi thrashed the glass wall again and again, the whole world was swaying brightly in the sun, she could not feel the pain, but she stared straight at Li You inside with hatred, thumping again and again.

A dull and intrusive thump echoed in the empty room.

The wound on her hand cracked, and the glass debris sticked into the skin. She didn't even know it, and the blood stained the glass. She was like a trapped tireless beast, kicking wildly.

Li You always looked at it leisurely until

Zhen Yi suddenly turned her head, her eyes coldly searching around, and she settled. She ran to the wall, broke the fire glass with a few punches, and pulled out the red hammer inside.

In a flash, the fire alarm sounded through the world and the red light flashed.

Her face glowed with red light, like a demon coming out of hell, rushing over with a hammer and hitting hard.

A broken line appeared on the glass.

Smashed again,

countless times,

The broken lines on the glass spread like spider silk, growing larger and larger.

"what!!"

She screamed and slammed the hammer, the large area of ​​glass fell apart, and the broken diamond shone in the sun, falling like a curtain of light.

She was holding a knife and stepped barefoot on the glass on the ground, and she didn't feel pain in the blood all the way. His eyes were fierce, and he walked toward him step by step.

Li You narrowed her pupils slightly, but did not back away. After a while, she smiled gently: "Zhen Yi, kill me, what can you change? Kill me, what is the difference between you and Zhen Xin?"

Zhen Yi couldn't hear or understand. She clenched her fists, clenched her teeth, her face sullen, and in the gleaming red light, she lifted a knife and thrust at him.

"Zhen Yi!"

Who was holding her wrist tightly? Next second, she was taken into a warm and familiar embrace.

Words were short of breath, and the violent running made him sweat all over his forehead, holding Zhen Yi and dragging her back.

Zhen Yi froze for a second, and found his words.

In an instant, all the distress was like a torrent of torrents, and she was swept over and over. She was so painful that she couldn't breathe.

"what!!!"

She did not let go of the knife while holding the knife, and the other hand grabbed the arm around her waist firmly, kicking and crying mournfully:

"Kill him! Kill him! I want to kill him! I want to kill him!"

"Zhen Yi!" He hugged her tightly, his jaw resting on her struggling head, controlling her out-of-control body.

"It's okay, Zhen Yi, I'm okay."

Yeah, when anything came to him, he could be silently tolerant, and then relieved, nothing mattered.

How can it matter?

Her heart couldn't be better, it was so painful that she died better than she died.

"no no!"

She cried and screamed, not wanting to struggle violently, the knife in her hand cut the speech arm. She stunned suddenly, loosened her hand, and the knife hit the ground, Ding Ding Dong Dong.

She stared at Yan Jie's mouth and the blood flowing, and suddenly stopped her hysterics, tears, and fell silently.

"Zhen Yi, I'm okay." Yange supported her shoulders, squatted slightly, her eyes flush with her, looked at her eyes, and slowly said, "It's just a small injury, don't be afraid, Zhen Yi. It's okay, I it does not matter."

His eyes are so deep and forgiving, his voice is so gentle and calm, with soothing power.

She was dumb, quiet, and motionless.

"Is it okay?" Li You was bound by the **** who came and smiled happily. "Speech, she is out of control, walking dead. Do you want to take care of her like this for a lifetime? Stay by her side all the time, she will give it as soon as she goes crazy Is she hypnotized? "

Yan Yan looked at him lightly, as if looking at the air, and said to the nurse: "Secure him."

Work, order, without any emotion.

Liyou was ignored again by him, and again he had nothing to say. He didn't know whether it was because he was comatose and unconscious at the time, or the person was too detached and clean.

After speaking, he looked down at Zhen Yi standing in front of him.

She stood silently, her eyes silent, and she was wounded. The hair is messy, and there is a mouth on the face, which has long been scabbed in the cold wind, a few scars on the neck, dust on the T-shirt, blood on the hands, and blood on the feet.

His heart was so dull, he frowned deeply, hugged her horizontally, and went all the way to his studio.

Yange sat Zhen Yi on the table, washed her wounds and applied gauze.

When clearing the sole of the foot, I saw that her feet were all broken glass slag, red blood mixed with it, like a hedgehog in a **** forest.

His heart couldn't breathe for a moment, and he took a soft breath without moving his head, lowering his head, and took tweezers to break her glass.

The broken hair covered his eyes, no one saw them, his eyes were wet.

Not for anything, but for her.

Knowing clearly that she could not feel the pain at this moment, he still gently blows at her, cautiously, for fear of hurting her.

"Speech," she said suddenly, expressionless, "I'm going home."

The expression was startled, and she looked up, not knowing when she woke up herself.

Her face was unusually calm, her black eyes were silent and clear, and she repeated rigidly:

"I'm going home. I'm going home, I'm going back to Yange's house."

He knew that she was Zhen Yi now.

"Zhen Yi" was looking for her all over the city. At this moment, her situation could not pass the level. And the Huai Ru thing

But he put down the tweezers, wrapped her gauze around her feet, and answered, "Okay, I will take you back."

Jiuxi Yanzhuang.

The night breeze is clear and the leaves are boundless.

In a wooden building in a courtyard on the south side, the lights are dim, and the carved windows are closed, reflecting the classic ink paintings. This building is like an ancient lantern, quiet and elegant, with a soft light at night.

Zhen Yi curled up on the small couch in the living room on the first floor, her thin body wrapped in a blanket, and fell asleep. Only exposed wounded arms and soles wrapped in gauze.

She opened her eyes, motionless, and stared at the speech without blinking, her eyes were straight, serious, and hard, but she said nothing, as if holding on to a treasure that cannot be lost.

Yan Ge sat on the sloping edge and raised her hand to gently touch her forehead. She did not resist or flinch, and she was completely unsuspecting to him.

At this moment, he shouldn't mention anything that was no longer important, let alone stimulate her.

He said it does not matter, it really does not matter.

That day he was already unconscious, so every time I think back to those years, the only thing that was inscribed in my heart was the words that Zhen Yi said. That's all.

He was seriously injured, and during his treatment in the United States, he was accidentally exposed to mental illness.

Only then did I know: Zhen Yi was sick, and he was sick.

Zhen Yi's illness needs someone to take care of him all his life. He wants to be the one who treats Zhen Yi's disease.

As for himself, Zhen Yi said he was "boring and boring." Even if he later learned that Zhen Xin said, he couldn't help but think, he really is like this. If I see Zhen Yi again when I grow up, what will I do if Zhen Yi feels that he is bored and boring for a lifetime?

It ’s foolproof when we meet again.

Therefore, he must not only understand Zhen Yi, but also save himself. Don't be locked in your own world anymore, don't ignore other people in your life, don't be such a boring person.

For 8 years, he has been treating his illness.

For 8 years, his people have been watching her movements. Unexpectedly, she was very normal and had a very good life without any problems.

But since this year's reunion and his reappearance in her life, her situation has gradually become unstable.

The mother said that this is a will, as if they were born with each other, and together they are disasters.

Oh, would he believe this fatalism? ridiculous!

On the way back from the HK pass, she didn't speak or move, but just shrunk in his arms, holding his waist tightly, and would not let go for a while. Perhaps he was very tired, but he refused to close his eyes, as if he was afraid of letting go of his hand, and once he closed his eyes, he would disappear.

She didn't feel at ease until she entered the garden and reached his home.

When holding her off the car, she sighed softly: "It's safe."

The heart of words suddenly knocked hard.

She is going back here, worrying about his safety.

At the moment, she held one of his arms and opened her eyes, not knowing what she was thinking.

For a long time, her clear black eyes slowly turned back, her eyebrows frowned, some uncomfortable look.

Yan's hand stopped and asked, "What's wrong?"

Her voice was very soft: "Hungry."

Hearing her say this, his dangling heart fell halfway.

At this time, the meal has passed.

"I go to the kitchen and ask someone to cook for you." He was about to get up.

She grabbed his hand, "I want to eat what you made, I want pine nuts corn."

"Okay." He sat down again, took her hand, and rubbed her thumb gently against the back of her hand for a while before getting up and leaving.

Zhen Yi watched him leave, confused and exhausted. She finally closed her eyes. Only, a line of tears fell into the hair room from the corner of the eye.

In the late autumn night, the squeaks of the summer night bugs were gone, and there was only the gurgling stream of water.

She fell asleep quietly until

In the autumn wind, I heard the sounds of Ding Ding Dong Dang Dong as clear as water.

Exorcism Bell sang ancient songs in the night breeze.

Zhen Yi slowly opened her eyes. That's the wind chime on the tower.

Even at night, empty, candles and paper lanterns are lit in the tower.

Zhen Yi was wrapped in gauze on her feet and walked up the wooden stairs. Her feet seemed to step on the tip of the knife, so painful that she could not make a sound. She remembered her grandfather telling her that after the Little Mermaid became a person for love, she stepped on the blade of the blade every step she took.

On the first floor and the second floor, she did not squint and stayed on the third floor.

Oil lamps, candlelights, moon-white lanterns, an ancient and quiet loft, a room of elegant and light ink fragrance.

In the hazy milky light, black books wall by wall stood quietly in the black bookshelf, silent, steady, with a solemn sense of solemnity, inexplicably awesome.

With the window open, the night wind blew in, and Zhen Yi shivered violently, inexplicably nervous and panicked. Looking around, I saw the numbers on the base of each ancient bookshelf with a carving knife.

2002

2003

2014

1,2,311,12 are engraved on the vertical beam of the bookshelf.

At a glance.

Each vertical beam represents a row of horizontal spaces. In one year and one month, there are many, many books. A string of numbers is carved under the position where each book stands on the beam.

Sometimes, a book is engraved with 17, sometimes it is engraved with 13, and sometimes it is engraved with 2131.

Sometimes, a space is full of books, and sometimes there is only one in a space, with 131 carved on the wooden beam.

That is the number of days.

Standing in the middle of the attic, she looked back constantly, turning around unconsciously for several circles, her eyes flowing like water between the bookshelves, some panic, some anxiety, and I wonder where to look.

For 12 years, the book was assembled in a silent black line.

She was inexplicably grabbed by a great awesome force, which was too grand and pressed against her chest, making her breathless.

In the end, her eyes fell on the space of 2014, 04.

There are 2 books, the first one is 120 and the second one is 2130.

It was this year, the April they met eight years later, that day, on the 21st.

She was quiet and uneasy, her heart slightly cold, perhaps because of the cold, and began to tremble finely. After all, she held her arm and pulled out the second one.

The pure black thread-booked notebook has a very good texture. It is warm and thick in hand.

Turned over, it is off-white pure white paper with no lines and no impurities.

There are only running books written in small brushes, running clouds and flowing water.

"April 21, 2014

Hello there.

Zhen family, who are you looking for?

I'm here.

Don't be afraid, the old man is fine.

Goodbye!

Please wait!

Just accidentally put your trench coat on the fire, don't know where to send it to remedy?

Words?

long time no see.

You forgot, I am Zhen "

Write a small line: "I saw Zhen Yi today."

There was no glory in her eyes, but she spontaneously floated a trace of tears and took a deep breath. Her arms seemed to be carrying a weight of a catty, and slowly stuffed the book back.

His eyes moved down to the recent space of 2014, 11.

There are currently 3 books, the first one is 15, the second one is 613, and the third one is not marked.

She took the third book, and soon understood the reason why there was no standard number: it was not finished yet.

First page:

"November 14, 2014.

(phone)

Words, a little busy today.

I ate an oversized pizza at noon, which made me eat it all by myself. The people in the studio stared at me like staring to death. Fortunately you are not here, otherwise I will definitely be able to eat you in one bite haha. "

At noon a few days ago, she chatted on the phone for nearly half an hour and turned into text. He wrote seven full pages of paper.

Even though it was written to the end, the writing was not in a hurry, and it was recorded in such a calm and peaceful mood.

Write a line of small print: "Zhen Yi is busy today, I didn't see Zhen Yi."

Gradually, sad emotions poured into her atrium like some kind of sticky and impermeable liquid. Her heart sank a little, she couldn't hold it up, she was about to fall.

She lowered her head and stared blankly.

The night wind blew through the window, rolled the pages of the book, and turned to the next one,

"November 15, 2014.

Words, you will rub my chest more in the future.

Did you hear what I just said?

At university, my roommate studied this subject.

nonsense! He won't touch you!

You are lying! Words will never touch you! Not only will he not touch you, he will not want you to send yourself to his bed.

I promised you would not contact him. "

3 pages.

Write a small line: "I saw Zhen Yi today."

Change one.

"September 10, 2014

Words, are you alone?

Words, don't be afraid, I will always be with you. Then you will not be alone all the time. "

Change one.

"July 30, 2014

Words, do you know how it feels to be happy? Have you been happy

Words, I want to make you happy. Life is so long, to live for so many years, is not alone? Every day, one person drives to the hospital, one person drives home, no one tells you the truth, and you do n’t let anyone walk into your heart, are you not alone?

I will be distressed when you are like this; so, no matter what, I won't let go! "

Change another one.

"October 2, 2014

Words, you owe me a deep kiss, remember it! "

The pages fluttered in the wind, and she closed her notebook, her hands shaking violently.

The night wind was cold, and her heartache seemed to be dug out and thrown into the ice and snow, but she was not dead. She still jumped and jerked on the ice.

In fact, his eyes were dull, but he still turned back slowly. Looking at the back of 2002, his body stiffened for a moment, and his legs seemed to be filled with lead.

Her eyes were straight, with tears in the candlelight, and she stared at 2002, step by step, walking extremely hard.

With every step taken, the body seemed to have passed through the time elapsed in whistle, going back in time little by little, and going back to the first meeting.

She finally stopped at the door in 2002, looking up, the 18th floor was empty.

On the 9th floor, the first black diary starts on the 10th.

The sight was already blurred in the water, and the hands were shaking violently, so much that they would bump on the wooden frame. She raised her hand hard and took down the first diary.

The notebook of 12 years ago, after years, the cover has faded slightly, with a faint white.

Turned over, the pages of the book had already turned yellow.

Twelve years ago, the writing style of Yange was still very green, and regular scripts had not yet formed their own fonts and styles. So young, so young,

With only one glance, her tears rushed out of her heart like crazy, over her throat and filled her eyes.

She opened her mouth and tried to make a sound, but she suddenly covered her mouth with her hand and couldn't make any sound. She stood in front of the bookshelf, holding a book, trembling all over her bow and waist.

In the crystal-clear glass full of the world, the water is bright and bright. On the first page of the yellowing, she reads:

"September 10, 2002

Bullying, school, classmates, die.

God, you look good.

Beautiful, go, will, rob, meet me, erotic.

No, play, I am from the Appearance Association, excited.

Oh, fun.

Your name.

Be my boyfriend? "

Every word is pressed down with extra force, as if he is trying his best to think back and work hard. But how can I force myself, but I can't remember the complete words.

Because he didn't hear it!

But the sentence at the end is particularly fluent:

"Today, I met a girl;

She fell from the sky like a colorful sun. "

Zhen Yi opened her eyes stubbornly, covered her mouth vigorously, tears twirled in her eyes, poured out, filled up again, and her thin shoulders tremble like a piece of paper in the night breeze. On her shoulder, she couldn't bear it anymore and fell to her knees.

She can even think of the state when Yan Ge wrote this first diary many years ago.

He was originally locked in his own world without anyone. Dark and quiet, he didn't feel lonely.

Until that day, there was a girl who fell from the sky ...

Since that moment, he has seen this world. In this world, she alone.

She is laughing, she is bouncing, she is talking.

But he couldn't hear what she was talking about, he wanted to hear it, worked hard, and was even anxious.

But the words that jumped into his ears were all fragmented. Every time he wrote a word, he pressed it hard unconsciously, anxiously, annoyed, trying to remember what the girl said.

The next day and the third day, the girl jumped into his life. She said more and more, and he became more and more flustered. All the records were fragments, mixed with occasional words:

"Go back to the new skirt and raise the flag to look nice

Look at the rainbow! "

She was full of tears in her hand, she placed the book on the floor and looked back in a panic. It was all such fragments, and the last effort and perseverance of each word.

She hurriedly got up, rushed to the bookshelf, and looked through the next diary in chronological order. The first three months were all fragmentary. But day by day, there are fewer and fewer fragments, more and more complete sentences, and the use of each word is more and more light.

Later, it became more and more fluid.

She has been talking for so many years, twitter, sometimes half a day.

day after day,

The lights in the stairwell were broken, the strawberry-flavored ice cream came on the market, and I got another 21 points for the exam. When I got home late, I was trained by my aunt.

All the trivial things, many trivial things that she had forgotten, the youthful young memories, ignorant and carefree, in the 4 years of getting along, all settled on the paper.

Her tears were hazy, she couldn't breathe, and she couldn't even stand upright. She turned back page by page. The teenager's memories flew like a film, and finally arrived on the day of the division.

KTV fire on July 30, 2006.

At the moment, that page reads:

"July 31, 2006

Words, I don't like you anymore. You are so boring, and with you, I have become boring.

Words, I don't like myself at all when I am with you. I don't like it at all.

What to see? Let go, tell you to let go.

Words, I don't like you anymore, I don't like it anymore, don't you understand?

There will be a period later. "

Write a line of small print: "Today, Zhen Yi is angry."

Zhen Yi dumbfounded, painful, and burst out of his lungs. A picture suddenly flashed in his head. The teenager fell to the ground, crawled over, and his dirty fingers clenched her ankles tightly.

She kicked open and waved at him:

"There will be a future."

When the wind blows through the hall, another line appears on the back of the page:

"So far, the liver and intestines are broken."

Zhen Yi's tears kept flowing, and at the moment of seeing those nine words, the waves calmed down.

At the end of 8 years ago, in the 12-year diary,

In 12 years, 4383 days, his only emotional expression was:

For the rest of the story, the liver and bowel are broken.

She hurt him, he was good, she should not provoke him.

"" She opened her mouth, trying to make a sound, wanting to vent, but there was no sound of pain. She crawled to find the vacant 8 years.

There was only one book per month in those 8 years. Her hands were full of tears, and she panicked and grabbed the books open, all the same except for the date:

"September 1, 2006

There will be a period later. "

Write a small line: "Zhen Yi did not come back today."

"September 2, 2006

There will be a period later. "

Write a small line: "Zhen Yi did not come back today."

Throughout September, October, November, and December, to 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010,

2011

2012

2013

2014

"April 2, 2014

There will be a period later. "

Write a small line: "Zhen Yi did not come back today."

Take out a book, look at a book, the date of the flow, if it does not change.

Zhen Yi did not return today.

Zhen Yi did not return today.

The book in his hand fell, Zhen Yi pressed his head hard, his headache was about to split, and he desperately thought about it, but he couldn't think of the extra content anymore.

The face was soaked with tears, but he couldn't stop it anymore. On the floor and on the pages of the book were all ink stains with tears fading away, like black ink paintings.

In the twinkling tears, only the writing on the white paper was exceptionally clear, one word at a time, hitting her heart straight, breaking her heart.

A room full of books was written for her.

He never said love words, only one word, one word, plainly and gently recorded her words of happiness or embarrassment or sadness or excitement, and from then on, her engraving of her colorful youthful time and youth .

But, at the end of a daily record, write his mood in the most peaceful handwriting, maybe there is a little throb, maybe there is a little loss, or there is a shallow expectation, but the most simple Wuhua

"Zhen Yi is busy today, I didn't see Zhen Yi."

"I saw Zhen Yi today."

"Zhen Yi didn't come back today."

She knelt in a black note in a room and cried over her head.

Suddenly, he looked up, looking at the desk near the window with tears, a table, a chair and a lamp, silent and clear under the wind of the autumn wind, like the man sitting here writing.

A few small brushes hung on the pen holder, the table was clean, and a long ink on an inkstone, facing the night wind alone.

The wooden edge supported the window, and there was an endless night outside.

I vaguely saw that, 12 years ago, the young boy in white shirt, who could not speak, sat there. He lowered his head, his back was silent, and his slender fingertips were attached to a writing brush, recording the first encounter with the girl.

So, in a flash, the years passed by the window.

The sun sets every day, the flowers bloom, the reincarnation of the years, the vicissitudes of the sea. The teenager sitting in front of the window grew up fast every day, but the posture of writing never changed.

Write down and write acacia.

For 12 years!

The seasons change and the tide rises and falls. In this world, countless lovers broke up, countless languages ​​died, and even some countries split and disappeared from the map.

Time passed, and he never looked back. His handwriting changed between pages, but he was still here.

Persevere in silence and refuse to leave.

That year, she came to his world with a smile, so he quietly and quietly spent her life giving her a perfect commemoration.

With 12 years of tremendous power, she pressed Zhen Yi and finally crushed her. She bowed deeply and covered her mouth, crying like a twitching shrimp.

On this day, she seemed to have shed tears in her life.

The wind seemed to be sad, blowing in from the window, swaying the candlelight, whirling at night, and the pages were tumbling and mourning.

She opened her mouth to justify, but suddenly there was a huge pain in her belly, so that she suddenly stopped her tears, and finally could only cover her mouth hard, widening her eyes in horror.

In the palm of her hand, tears mixed with blood, she covered her hands in a panic. Then I realized that people can have heartache and hematemesis.

In an instant, tears ran wild again. The heart hurt so unconscious that he desperately wanted to cover the pain, but the **** smell filled like a surge, and could no longer be suppressed.

He said that after this, the liver and intestines were broken.

Liver and bowel are broken!

Carrying the dinner plate with words, he bypassed the corridor, and suddenly heard Zhen Yi's miserable cry at night: "No! No!"

When I looked up, I saw a fire on the high tower.

He left the plate on the promenade and ran towards it immediately.

When we ran downstairs, we saw a fire in the old attic.

Zhen Yi cried heartbroken: "Don't do this, sister! Don't do this! Don't !!!"

His heart sank sharply and ran up to the third floor quickly.

There was a mess in the study, and black notebooks were stacked in the middle of the room. Candles, lamp oil spilled on top, burning a blaze.

Zhen Yi knelt beside the pile of books and rescued the books in the fire with bare hands!

The tongue of fire licked her hands, and she was unaware. She clapped the fire with her hand while crying sadly: "Don't burn my things! Don't burn my things!"

"Zhen Yi, don't touch!" Yan Ge was so distressed that she bleed, and immediately strode over to get her off the ground.

But she was struggling desperately, and her red scars had to be burned in her hands. She was completely out of control: "Speaking, my sister burned your book. Hurry up, you hurry up."

Yan's eyes were suddenly wet, and she was firmly hugged into her arms, no matter how she struggled to resist.

"Zhen Yi, listen to me. Zhen Yi, it doesn't matter, it burns, it doesn't matter."

Voices have been heard outside the courtyard, it is the firefighters who are coming.

His words fell, and Zhen Yi in his arms suddenly fell silent.

Words hugged her tightly, and touched her cheeks that were hot and moist, and felt so painful like a knife cut, but softly but forcefully: "Zhen Yi, these things don't matter."

Before he finished, the man in his arms gave a soft laugh.

Suddenly, with a cold heart, she released her immediately.

"Is it okay?" The **** the opposite face was flushed with tears, and the expression was extremely calm and cold. "It hurts the person who hurts you the deepest, and the person you love most, in the same body?"

The words took a step back, slowly pulling away from her, his face calm and indifferent.

"It's okay," he said lightly. "Because of her goodness, you are so bad and insignificant. It's not worth mentioning."

Zhen Xin's face was even colder, she was so angry.

It was because of this man that she lived a dormant life for more than ten years and was always suppressed by Zhen Yi.

Eight years ago, a simple misunderstanding would not separate them. Juveniles who can be separated because of misunderstanding, their feelings can't stand the test, their skin is superficial and subtle, and where can people be desperate to stay for 8 years?

impossible.

This man, adolescent autism. In his world, there is only Zhen Yi.

He is really like a silent puppy, who does not understand the world, but only knows the master who guards his heart. If you catch it, it won't go. If you kick it, it won't run. You will throw it away and throw it away.

He is such a person.

I do n’t understand human relationships, the world, and the reason for breaking up.

Zhen Yi is already the sun in his heart, what is the breakup? He does not understand and will not obey. She shook his hand away, and he learned how she chased him before, chased it over and over, and held it tightly over and over again.

How many times she flicked away, he insisted more than once.

So, if it wasn't that kind of injury, it wasn't that there was another person in Zhen Yi's body, he would die at her feet even if he died, and he wouldn't leave.

He is a saying, he can't leave Zhen Yi.

It is precisely because of this man that Zhen Yi has the sun in his heart, and Zhen Xin in the dark can never come out again.

Recently, she finally showed up several times, but was suppressed back.

Hateful, hateful!

Zhen Xin sneered and said ironically: "Speech, she is out of control, she can't hold me back anymore."

"No." The expression was still calm and calm, and he shook his head gently, the man who had always been light and windy, but what he said at this moment was resolute and determined, with a calm and steady force,

"Zhen Yi, you can never be defeated. And, I will always be with her and help her, so that you will never see the sun."

"You!" She glared, what she was about to say, but suddenly she was dragged into the abyss by some huge force.

Don't.

Speaking of a change in her face, she immediately stepped forward to hug her,

The "Speech" girl was in tears and fainted in his arms.

But when Zhen Yi woke up, it was the beginning of a nightmare.

Since then she seemed to have fallen into endless fear, always worrying that her speech would be hurt.

Day and night, she refused to sleep, but she held her speech tightly and pulled him to hide, hiding in the closet for a while and hiding under the quilt for a while.

Her thin body shivered uncontrollably, holding him and whimpering: "What should I do? Words, he is going to hurt you. What should I do?"

No matter how comforting he was, she didn't listen or believe it, just holding him and crying, soaking his clothes with tears, the cry was so sad and sad, like a soldier who was always worried about not protecting her children.

She didn't drink water or eat anything. She was so dehydrated that she cried, but she only knew how to hold her speech. Wherever he went, wherever she went, he always looked at the people around him in horror, and as soon as a figure appeared, he stopped in front of the words and cried:

"You run, you run, he came to harm you, he came to harm you. Who will help me to save words, who will help me to save words."

Even the guards outside the courtyard will make her whisper and make her pull out a fruit knife in shock and rush out

Sometimes, she doesn't recognize words.

So he was looking for fear and blankness in the garden alone, and wept when he grasped the speech pattern: "What about the speech pattern, where did you catch the speech pattern?"

Yange tried to appease her, saying he was.

But she just shook her head and lifted her arms to wipe the tears, feeling wronged and sad: "You are not. My words are not as high as yours." At this time, her memory went back to the little boy of the breeze and bright moon 12 years ago.

She would push him away, whine and cry, and continue to look in the courtyard: "Well, where did the words go?"

More often, I can't find it.

She would be curled up on his bed by herself, shivering in the quilt, like a small beast injured and unable to heal, abandoned by its companion, and she was alone.

She would hold his quilt tightly, her small face on top, and from time to time, she sniffed and took a breath.

Because of his smell on the blanket.

Only then will she feel at ease.

Various states are repeated.

Three days later, she was completely collapsed, dry and pale, lying on the bed, but weak but not crying.

In three days, the words were awkward, and there was black under his eyes. At that time, he finally made a decision.

In the morning, he took a bowl of water to sit next to her, took a spoon to scoop water to her lips. She felt the coolness on her lips, and her eyes moved to fix it on him.

This time, recognize him.

So there was a very shallow mist of tears in his eyes, and there was really no tears to shed.

She moved her chapped lips, angry with her hair:

"Speech, you run fast, he's here to hurt you."

Giving a gentle breath with restraint, blinked the mist in her eyes, fed her a few spoons of water, and put the bowl down.

"Zhen Yi, look at my eyes." He lowered his head and approached her.

This time, she was very obedient, and her black eyes didn't blink.

She is still Zhen Yi, with his favorite clear and pure eyes.

Slowly and softly, he said, "Zhen Yi, I don't matter, it really doesn't matter."

Zhen Yi, if you hurt yourself like this; please forgive me for the next decision, I will try to make you forget what happened in the past few days.

Actually, it really doesn't matter.

It ’s okay even if I ’ve been injured, I ca n’t see it, I ca n’t hear it, I ca n’t feel it.

Even if it is because you are injured, it does not matter, because you are willing to be tolerant to you and tolerate everything you do. Everything I say is good, bad, real everything.

Mother said you were dangerous, let me give you up. But how can I give up on you?

In this world, only I know your pain. Many people will say this sentence, but the correctness of this sentence is only verified between the two of us.

If I give up, no one can really save you. Zhen Yi will be suppressed by Zhen Xin from then on, and disappear into the dark abyss.

Zhen Yi, my favorite girl, the girl I love only, how can I make you disappear.

In fact, occasionally I am glad that I discovered this incident so early.

8 years of precipitation will make you better, make me better, let us reunite this time, better.

Let us not have any problems in the future; no, it should be that even if there are any problems in the future, we have enough confidence and strength to face them.

Let it be solved.

The 8 years of forbearance and hard work are for the sake of, one day, holding your hand and letting you come back to me.

Therefore, you can't let go of your hand for a lifetime!

I will love you with cleaner thoughts and soul than anyone.

Because, 12 years ago, your hand refused to let go; this time, I will give you the protection of your life.

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