Doomsday Bunker Upgrade

Chapter 116 Emotional breakdown (110)

"Axin is back, wash your hands and eat!" "Mom, I got the first place in my class in the final exam this time!" In the haze, deep in my memory, my mother's voice was so familiar and unfamiliar.

"My son is awesome! Dad took you to go swimming this weekend!" Dad always regarded himself as the pride of his life, but Chen Xin couldn't remember when his father stopped talking about his praise.

"Dad, I want to buy an astronomical telescope. I promise I can get four A's at the end of this semester!" When I was a child, I always yearned for the sky. What was my ideal at that time? astronomer? astronaut? At that time, everyone seemed to think the same.

"Son, you have to take care of yourself when you're outside alone, socialize more with your classmates in school, and tell me if you don't have enough money." He was admitted to university and left home for the first time in his life. A bank card was stuffed into Chen Xin's pocket.

"Hello, I'm also in this dormitory. Everyone will be brothers in the dormitory in the future." Chen Xin can't remember who this is in the dormitory, but it should be the eldest brother, right? The oldest, he always took care of others.

"Axin, look at that senior, so sassy! Don't fight me, I want to chase her as a girlfriend!" Senior? Chen Xin was very impressed with her. He didn't fight with his brother, but his brother was still in love.

"Whoever goes to the cafeteria to grab a meal, bring me a copy! Hurry up, hurry up! Back to defense at point A!" A group of shirtless boys were playing games in the dormitory. At that time, there were not many laptops, so what was everyone playing? ? Seems to be CS.

"Lights out, don't text your girlfriend!" Someone was checking the bed outside the door, and Chen Xin almost forgot that they were not allowed to turn on the lights after ten o'clock in the evening in the university.

"Senior, do you have a girlfriend? If not, can I be your girlfriend?" Is this the first school girl to confess to herself? Since the second year of his sophomore year, Chen Xin has been in charge of the orientation work every year. In addition, he is quite handsome, and he can't remember how many schoolgirls have confessed to him.

"Xiao Chen, do you want to form a club with senior sister?" Which senior sister is this? Why can't I remember?

"Let's sing together! Celebrate the establishment of our new club!" When did I form a club?

"What song do you sing? I can play the piano accompaniment. It just so happens that there is a piano here." Senior sister who can play the piano? Why can't I remember?

"Can you play that "End of the World"? That song was very popular a few years ago." Why did I choose this song? Let's celebrate the establishment of the new club together, shouldn't we sing a more festive song?

"Is that song adapted from "Song of Bamboo"? I will, I have learned the original Japanese version." Senior Sister sat in front of the piano, and the bright music played.

However, the strange thing is that the senior sister sang the Japanese version, while Chen Xin himself sang the Chinese version.

However, the two songs use the same tune and the melody is the same, so even if the lyrics are different, Chen Xin and the piano-playing sister still cooperate well.

Just as the two of them were singing together, the sound of the alarm clock suddenly sounded, breaking the harmony.

Chen Xin woke up.

Reaching out to grab the phone on the bedside table and turning off the alarm clock, Chen Xin sat up from the bed.

The newly installed ground source heat pump has started to work, and the temperature in the shelter has risen again at this moment. It is not as cold as it has been a few days ago. Chen Xin does not need to shrink in the bed every day when he wakes up. The ideological struggle to get up.

However, although the person woke up, the memories that emerged in the dream made Chen Xin feel melancholy, and he was still immersed in those memories.

Life with my parents when I was a child

Memories are beautiful, but also heavy.

However, apart from his parents, what Chen Xin cared about most was the senior who sang with him at the end of the dream.

Strictly speaking, that's not senior sister, because she and Chen Xin are in the same grade, but she is half a year older than Chen Xin, so after getting to know her, she will let Chen Xin keep calling her senior sister.

Recalling his high-spirited self ten years ago, as well as the memorable things he did in school, as well as those memorable people, Chen Xin felt like he was being sucked in by a huge vortex, and his emotions were constantly flowing Falling, unable to break free.

After brushing his teeth and washing his face, Chen Xin did not prepare breakfast as usual, but sat on the sofa with a bit of decadence and darkness.

Chen Xin didn't find it strange that he would dream about the past. People's dreams are related to what they think and think. It is normal to have dreams every day and night.

But...the people and things in the memories, those places full of memories, have disappeared, and they can't go back.

Looking at the paper he posted on the wall and the goal he had set last night, Chen Xin fell into deep self-doubt. Can he really achieve this goal? Can you really hold on to it? Does your insistence make sense?

Chen Xin is not a person who is easily decadent or depressed, but at this moment he is deep in self-doubt and denial.

He is doubting his own abilities, his motives for insisting on living, and his purpose of living...

The apocalypse is an environment with enormous mental pressure, and it is also a continuous, almost endless, stressful environment.

In such an environment, the pressure of survival, the loneliness of spirit, the despair of seeing no hope in the future...

These emotions are constantly accumulating. Some people have poor tolerance and may collapse quickly, but even people with strong tolerance are difficult to maintain optimism and positivity in such an environment.

Because there is really no reason to be optimistic, and there is no future worth looking forward to.

Perhaps because of the existence of the system, Chen Xin in the past can make himself less stressed, feel that life will only get better and better, and he can maintain an optimistic attitude.

But when he recalled the past and the beauty of the past, and compared it with the loneliness, loneliness, darkness, and coldness of the present, the pressure and negative emotions accumulated from the end of the world to the present broke out together, and Chen Xin no longer insisted on it. No longer.

He is not a Brooklyn boy who can never be defeated, nor is he the kind of Long Aotian who can instantly change his mentality from an ordinary person to slaughtering gods and demons.

Chen Xin is just an ordinary person, an ordinary person who is no different from everyone. He will cry, be afraid, be decadent, and be desperate.