Doomsday Wonderland

This long narrative is finally coming to an end.苋

I don't even know if anyone is listening after such an endless narration. Maybe I just told the story to the void; I can imagine that in the barren time after my death, the grave of the story is covered with tall grass, and the wind makes an empty sound.

You might think you already know what's going to happen next.

Overall, there really aren't many surprises. You know what I did and the person I became; as long as the end and outcome are the same, then it doesn’t seem that important what path I took.

However, I still feel that I need to emphasize one point - not to defend myself, I don't care about this; but I hope that you, or anyone who is listening to my story, can look at the life of my adoptive mother as accurately as possible .

I spent my first few years in the post-apocalyptic world still trying to abide by the rules my adoptive mother had set for me.

"Everyone makes mistakes sometimes, and you are alone." After my adoptive mother divorced, she said this to me two or three years later. "It doesn't matter if you make a mistake once. What's important is to keep moving forward on the right path."

Yes, I broke all of my foster mom's rules, but that was just "one time" in my mind.苋

And next time, and the next time, I can choose not to violate them.

My adoptive mother's rules have been the standard by which I have lived for twenty years. Relying on them, I have obtained a good education, income and status in human society, and gained the approval of others. But that's not the only reason you want to abide by them.

You once watched a TV series with your adoptive mother, which was based on a real serial killer from history. At this time, you feel that it is not too comfortable for you to watch next to you; but you will still ask you to watch with you.

You are too far away from home and have long forgotten the way back; all that is left for you is the faint feeling of homesickness that bites you.

…He probably doesn’t understand everything yet.

But you can tell him the real reason; otherwise he is very unlikely to feel that you are still a person who can save changes.

"Even if you swear there will never be a last time, will it still happen?" You asked.苋

However, it is precisely because of this set of rules that restricts you from all aspects that you feel real freedom. He sees that true freedom does not mean that he can do whatever he wants; freedom means that he can survive with his original appearance, that no matter what kind of appearance this is, he is still dangerous and he is still accepted - —still understood.

...You met him accidentally when you came here.

You healed this man's injuries and brought me a few items and some food.

"He has nothing." Before the dungeon started, I collapsed at the small door, grabbed your trouser legs, and cried to you sadly: "Please, please, because he has taken away everything from you. For my sake, let me keep you alive. All you want is a medical item and you just want to stop the bleeding..."

You don't know much about your adoptive mother at this time, whether it's your emotions, expressions, or the weakness and hardness of your personality. You couldn't help but be surprised, looking at you and laughing softly: "He will kill you! Really? Mom, he can't tell it directly, there are only two of us outside the house... He will kill you!"

So for the first few years, you're trying to impose your adoptive mother's rules on a post-apocalyptic world, like twiddling the wrist of a dead body to see if it can come back to life.

"That's nonsense," the foster mother said hurriedly and stood up. "Before he died, could you still survive alone?"

A long time ago, you were involved in a group fight over supplies; no one was willing to advance in the face of this truckload of stuff. Like a few others, you were also stained with blood. Not once has this person mistakenly thought that you who were reluctantly complying with the rules were a bad person, and could not take advantage of that... In short, he should understand better than anyone else that the opportunities created by the end of the world are too few.

In that sense, this set of rules are not shackles, they are boundaries drawn for you by your adoptive mother. Within the boundaries, you experienced seventy years of danger and freedom, the only seventy years of danger and freedom in your life.

You turned your head in amusement and prepared to continue watching TV. A second ago, you suddenly straightened up from the sofa.

You think again of your adoptive mother and the boundaries she set for you.

"You mean what if - what if he finds out that you are a serial killer?" You crossed your legs, leaned comfortably outside the sofa, and asked again.

The adoptive mother looked very calm and said, "This is also possible."

He is the closest person you can find.苋

Even now, before he has killed you, you still have to say: In that world, no one can stop you from doing anything you want to do, except Nan Wa Zhi.

Of course you know that the world you live in is no longer the same, and there are no so-called social rules; but... babies will become quiet when sucking the pacifier, and it is not because they suck milk.

You soon discovered that as long as you are willing, almost everyone can escape the influence of your ability; if you want to get less pleasure from others, we can only wail and provide you with less pleasure.

What he sees is that the first moment of your life is a theater that you have carefully arranged and organized many times; it should be hasty, weak and sudden.

As you tried to follow your adoptive mother's remaining rules again, you realized something.

When you look at this flying bird, somehow it brings back memories of your childhood, remembering the neighbor's bird feeder when you were a kid, and the handful of rice you scattered outside our yard.

"He has done harm, and he must make amends. Does he understand that no one deserves to be his target? In that world, there is no set of rules that anyone can break. He must learn to distinguish right from wrong, Only by knowing what things can be done and what things can be done can you live smoothly in that world... You want him to have a strong and happy life. Is he willing to let his mother help him?"

The first thing you throw away is "can kill people".

Like a grown-up child who is afraid of being caught in the wrong, the adoptive mother also turned her head, and you looked at each other for a second or two.

The person who made you grow up as a human being and saved your life is your adoptive mother; the person who should start your life now can only be your adoptive mother.

Not once have you been awakened by some movement in the middle of the night. You lie in the white night, with a little bit of strong skylight, quietly watching this woman who has never met you during the day, thinking that she quietly climbed out of the window of the room.

After a pause, the adoptive mother said "hmm", her eyes still focused on the TV screen.

You want to go back to your hometown, but it's not gone yet.

For Gong Daichi, the adoptive mother and child, the apocalyptic world is a chaotic and confusing place; for you, who was born to live outside Gong Daichi's body, the apocalyptic world is a kind of amusement park that God has given you. field.苋

But, it's not too late for you.

At this time, you haven't thought about your adoptive mother for a long time.

In order to prove that you are, and for this ending that you deserve to endure, you need to do a considerable amount of damage to him, and create (perhaps you need to create, just show your true colors) a cold, inferior, foreign body behind him. A general palace.

The last moment you thought about your neighbor's yard, you seemed to have fallen through time and fell back to the big palace of the past; you were standing under the driveway of Akihara's house, your adoptive mother holding your wrist tightly.

Whether you doubt the terms heaven or hell, it is true that you doubt it. The final road he has paved for you will definitely lead you to a place very close to you.

That way, you're satisfied, but you're still abiding by your adoptive mother's rules, right?

But you know something.苋

When an abstinent person suddenly breaks his abstinence, he naturally knows what is enough. This period of time is full of crazy indulgence, and you never know that you are satisfied. From a tortuous and complete life, you jump into the previous period of losing your human form and screaming, I feel that every day is very successful and enjoyable.

"You must be someone who enjoys killing. You secretly killed a few people. If he finds out, what will happen to him?" You turned around and asked.

It was obviously an experience that was very in line with your nature, but you remembered nothing but a vague outline. The most vague detail that I remember is that you got up in the middle of the night when there were people around you, wandered the streets of the city, and circled outside the house repeatedly. You knew what you were looking for, and you only knew that you still found it.

But the adoptive mother didn't hate that question and answer game, and once again denied your question. You only made a bad guess: "He will help you hide it and pretend it happened?"

I have a tattoo of a flying bird on my hand.

He is also someone who has survived in the apocalyptic world for more than ten years. He naturally knows what kind of place it is.

After a long time, the person who reminds you of your adoptive mother again is actually a familiar person. You did not regard me as prey at this time, because you were in the same dungeon, and you defeated me first - I was seriously injured, and also suffered the loss of the ability to degenerate (ability Rewarded to you by the copy).苋

The light outside your eyes shimmers so fluctuatingly and completely, you think, because there is no layer of tears.

You know what will happen before you die, and perhaps some changes will happen, so that he will never see that image letter.

The rules set by your adoptive mother are like an elastic band that has been around for too long. It gradually becomes looser and more shapeless before the apocalyptic world tries to explore, stretch, and narrow its limits again and again.

The adoptive mother glanced at you. "He will, you know what kind of kid he is. He has to control himself."

"Of course I will."

You said to yourself, if you can't regain peace by making amends before hurting others, is it the same if you make amends first and then hurt others? It's like a person standing at the edge of a cliff. If you push me and then pull me back, does that mean I'm back to the starting point?

you are yes.苋

Yes, you lied to him; the ups and downs of human emotions are the purpose of what you did.

This means that you can't go back in time, and you certainly can't choose to live outside any time period. You will choose to return to your adoptive mother repeatedly in the past seventy years, rely on documentaries and tragedies to satisfy your natural desires, and then be with you. Sit down and have dinner together.

As the rules of the foster mother are deformed, invalidated, and buried one by one, the space for you to stretch your hands and feet is getting smaller and smaller. Over the past few years, you have almost become red-eyed.

Speaking of which, UU Reading www.uukanshu.net may not be a bit counterintuitive.

You think you are stupid, but when an adult deceives himself, he is far more ineffective than a fool.

The little rules of the adoptive mother can be applied outside the apocalyptic world, but none of them are still the same: before doing harm, you must make amends to others. That was one of the few rules that you could still hold on to tightly (the other one was that eating human flesh was allowed, but you were not a bad fan of it); so you followed the path of the past few years and found some of your people. We made amends.

You are finally going home. If you say that, it may seem that you are being arrogant, but it is true that they have no choice and no chance of confrontation.苋

Did he say it was strange?

Of course no part of you knows that you are misinterpreting your adoptive mother's intentions and that you are abusing the rules you set. The more ambiguous you are in your heart, the more cautious and precise you will be in weighing the weight of harm and compensation on the scale, like an obsessive-compulsive disorder, to ensure a balance among the seven.

"What will happen to him?" you asked, "call the police?"

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