Dysfunctional - An Assassin's Guide to Reincarnating in Another World

"Ow! Hey, what was that for?"

Persia had walked over and flicked my forehead as I lay on the ground, staring up the hole in the ceiling and roof that I'd created.

"I told you not to use anything too powerful," She replied, staring at the ceiling with a sigh, "Who knows how much you're going to have to pay for repairs?"

What kind of a school makes it students pay for accidental vandalism? I'm genuinely asking...I've never gone to school before.

"Y-yeah, well...I still haven't figured out how this all works, I don't know the difference between how a strong and weak attack feel."

Would she buy that?

"Oh, really...because to me, it looked like you put as much as you possibly could into that blast," She responded, raising an eyebrow inquiringly.

Crap, busted!

I'm usually a better liar than this. She was really throwing me off my game.

"A-anyway...how much time do I have left in this size and age?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"I think...a bit more than thirty minutes? Do you want to do something else?"

The door suddenly swung open, and a few people walked in. I sprang to my feet, and quickly drew out the dagger.

"Oh, it's you guys, what are you doing here? Hey, easy, Little Kuro...they're your friends," Persia said in a soothing tone, placing her hands on my shoulders from behind.

That didn't sound right...

"Wait, I have friends? Are...you sure? I mean...this is me we're talking about," I muttered to myself uncertainly, eyeing them suspiciously.

"Hey, Persia...I was on my way here to pick up a notebook I'd left behind, I ran into these two on the way, they joined up with me, and we ran into Ragiu when we arrived. He mentioned that something interesting had happened to Kuro, and then a few minutes later, we heard a loud noise...oh, the ceiling," Said one of them, a guy with blonde hair and...a raccoon tail, I think?

The other two didn't seem to have any animal-like features. A guy with a sleepy face, and a red-haired girl with a face that looked easily irritable.

All three were staring at me in confusion and surprise.

This was starting to get old...

Persia briefly explained the situation to them, after which they all crowded me with curious expressions. She left out the whole part about the age of my memories and the age of my body not being in sync...maybe these people don't know about the whole reincarnation thing?

"This is quite disconcerting, seeing a younger version of someone you know...he is sort of cute, I suppose," Said the redhead.

"Hehe...I know, right?" Grinned Persia, rubbing her cheek against mine, turning my mind blank for a moment.

She r-really needs to stop doing stuff like that without warning...

They were all staring way too intently...I was more than a little uncomfortable.

"Aw, what about me?" The blonde guy asked the redhead expectantly, with an innocent grin.

"Wh-what about you? You're annoying, that's a-all," She replied, trying to sound indifferent and annoyed, but the stutters and blush were unmistakable.

Huh...maybe if I embarrass them, they'll back off a bit and give me some space.

"Oh, I see...Redhead likes Raccoon Tail," I said, with an expression of childish innocence...hey, might as well make use of this preteen body, right?

"H-huh, excuse me? Of course I don't! You don't k-know what you're talking about!"

"And yet, you're not only stuttering, but also blushing," I countered, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh wow, you said almost the same thing the other day, er- I mean, the big you. Not gonna lie, looking at this kiddie version of you is kinda disorienting and confusing. By the way, my name's Rai, not Raccoon Tail," Said Raccoon Tail, before adding, "Besides...this isn't a raccoon tail, it's a lemur tail, the ring-tailed kind."

Oh, like in that one movie, Madag-.

"Ahem! A-anyway, your assumption is completely wrong-!" Coughed Redhead, insisting that I was mistaken.

Alright, let's see how reactive she is. Time for a little psychological trick I'd learnt...

"Imagine him with another girl," I stated suddenly and clearly, carefully watching her expression.

You can learn a lot by reading a person's facial reactions, though of course, it wasn't a flawless technique, it wouldn't work on anyone who was good at bluffing.

She looked a bit taken aback at first, before her expression briefly soured, after which she quickly tried to hide it.

"Ooh, you did not look happy just then. Guess my assumption was right after all," I shrugged, before flashing her a triumphant smirk.

"N-no, that's how anyone would react to- I-I'm not...ughhhh! Y-you stupid brat, you have no idea what you're talking about!"

Heh...her face was almost as red as her hair, this was fun.

"Uh...maybe let's all just calm down a bit-," Began Persia, trying to ease the rising tensions.

"Ohh...I get it now...you're a Tsundere, aren't you?"

Raccoon Tail let out a stifled snort of laughter, before unconvincingly trying to pass it off as a cough. The sleepy looking guy and Persia looked confused.

As for Redhead...she looked pissed.

"That word again...first this idiot calls me it and refused to explain what it means, and now you...! You little-!" She growled, glaring at me.

"Heh, how do you feel, knowing that a little kid was able to agitate you this much-," I began to respond.

"O-okay, that's enough out of you!" Interrupted Persia, covering my mouth, "Let's all just get along, okay? Please behave, Little Kuro."

I wanted to protest, but...she was so distracting, it was kinda hard to think...huh...I was starting to lose interest in antagonizing Redhead...

"...Azyl, come here for a second," Growled Redhead, a blank, angry glare on her face.

Heh, looks like I had really pissed her off big time.

"Uh...why-?" Sleepy-Face began to ask, before Redhead impatiently grabbed one of his hands and pulled of the glove over it, and then moving it close to my face.

"Hey, brat...this is a frog's hand."

"Uh, Key...maybe this is a bit-," He began to say, a bit uncomfortably.

I didn't hear the rest of what he said, as my knees collapsed and my body broke out into a cold sweat, sheer terror seizing my body.

Damn it, you've gotta be kidding me...I had revealed my greatest weakness and only real phobia to these people?

What the hell was I thinking!?

"G-get away from me...," My voice came out in a terrified whisper, by body not listening to me, as I began hyperventilating.

"W-woah...," Raccoon Tail stared at me in astonishment.

"Hey, what's wrong!?" Persia rushed over to my side, wrapping her arms around me gently.

I bit down on my lower lip as hard as I could, desperately trying to stop panicking. There's no frog here...its just a person with frog-like hands, he's not an actual frog...calm down...that's it...

My breathing slowly returned to normal, my body slumping in Persia's arms as I calmed down. I couldn't get my hands to stop shaking.

"U-um...I'm sorry, I might have gone a bit too far," Apologized Redhead, a look of guilt on her face.

"You think?" Sighed Sleepy-Face, putting his glove back on.

"...what's going on?" Inquired the confused Raccoon Tail.

"Wait, I get it...that time at the swamp when you seemed to act really weird by the water...oh, and during one of the meal breaks in the Brawl of Glory, you looked kinda pale and made some excuse before leaving...when they'd been serving fried frog legs," Persia's eyes widened as she connected dots that I wasn't even aware of, "Are you...afraid of frogs?"

"..."

I couldn't bring myself to speak. This felt...humiliating.

"We accidentally found out a while ago...he was so horrified that we promised to never tell anyone, but...," Explained Sleepy-Face, before shifting his gaze to Redhead.

"Yes, sorry again...I might have lost my temper," Added Redhead apologetically.

An awkward silence filled the room...

"H-hey, I know! Why don't we all go back to my place, play a board game or something?" Suggested Raccoon Tail, trying to ease the awkward tension.

"Y-yeah, good idea! What do you say, Little Kuro?"

"...sure, whatever."

...

...

I trailed behind them as I followed them to wherever it was that they were leading me. I was too embarrassed and moody to look any of them in the eye after what just happened.

Besides Lagusa, no one had ever seen me that terrified before. Persia slowed down her pace to walk next to me.

"Hey, you okay...do you want to talk about it?"

"...not particularly, no."

"Okay, then."

"..."

"..."

"...I don't know how it started or why...the first time I saw a frog and it hopped towards me, I was immediately paralyzed with terror...it was strange, I had come across snakes and other more dangerous animals at that point, but...none of them scared me like the frog did..."

Huh...why was I talking about this?

This is my biggest weakness...it's not something I speak about...ever. And yet...

"...when Lagusa found out...he subjected me to exposure therapy by locking me in a room filled with frogs and toads for a whole day. Unfortunately, all that did was make my phobia so, so much worse. That day, I nearly mentally crippled myself beyond repair in sheer terror. After that, I never tried to cure it...I just hid it," I finished explaining, unable to stop myself from opening up to her.

I can't believe that I told her all that, and yet...it felt like a weight had been lifted, and...I couldn't bring myself to regret telling her.

"I can see why you'd want to hide it, but...it's nothing to be embarrassed about, everyone's afraid of something. Though, I probably will tease you about it after you're back to normal," She smiled with a slight teasing look, before ruffling my hair again.

This time, I didn't say anything, letting her do it.

I hadn't really experienced physical contact with another person before, not like this anyway. It felt nice...to be touched.

...that came out sounding really wrong, didn't it? Eh, whatever...I know what I meant by it.

As she took her hand off, I reached up and grabbed it before I realized what I was doing.

She looked surprised for a moment before giving me a warm smile.

"...do you want me to keep going?"

I silently nodded slowly, as I felt my face get warmer. She smiled and continued stroking my head, until we reached our destination.

"Thanks," I mumbled quietly.

"Hm, did you say something?"

"...no, nothing important. Just talking to myself."

As we walked towards the front door and began to enter, she suddenly stopped.

"Uh, Rai...is your sister home?" She inquired warily.

"Huh? Yeah, I think so...why do you ask- oh, right...never mind," He sighed sheepishly, as he looked at me.

"Uh...what's with that look?" I asked, getting a bad feeling.

"N-nothing...let's go in!" He replied, a bit too quickly.

...what was that about?

He led the way once we were inside, making an effort not to make any noise for some reason. He was being awfully cautious, considering that this was his own house...

Suddenly, a door opened, and a young girl walked out. She had a blonde ponytail, green eyes, and...rabbit ears?

"A bunny girl?" I blurted out, before I could stop myself.

"Hm? Oh, big brother and his friends...wait, who's this?" She asked, staring at me with a confused look, like she half-recognized me.

"Rilia! This is, uh...n-no one at all!" Blurted Raccoon Tail immediately.

Yeah, that wasn't suspicious at all.

"He looks just like Kuro...are you his little brother or something?" She asked, squinting while staring at my face.

I was really getting tired of this routine...why does everyone I come across have to scrutinize my face so much!?

Maybe she'll stop if I just say who I am...

"No...I'm Kuro," I responded, taking a step back.

She took two steps forward right away, and stared even closer.

"Too close!" Snapped Persia, pulling me away immediately and standing in front of me.

Overprotective and possessive much?

...n-not that I minded or anything.

Raccoon Tail sighed and reluctantly explained my situation to her.

...

"Ohh, so this is Kuro, but twelve instead of seventeen?" She replied, looking deep in thought before scrunching up her face, "...yeah, I'm not into younger guys...I'll see you when you're back to normal, Kuro!"

...well, at least she's honest.

"You really don't have to," Replied Persia, with a fake, irritated smile.

"L-let's go to my room, guys! Rilia, go...uh...go do whatever it is that you do when you're bored, alright?" Said Raccoon Tail, as he hurriedly led us further into the house.

"Fine, whatever...you're so stupid, big brother," She huffed, before heading back into her room.

"Uh...was it something I said?" He muttered in confusion.

...

After that, we headed to a room, and he took out a square of cardboard that had been made into a Ludo board using paint. For the pieces, there were small, painted pebbles. They were painted red, green, blue and yellow, four of each color. And a dice...

Hey, here's a chance for me to finally look good.

We started the game with about ten minutes left before I would apparently grow by one year physically, along with my memories.

Huh, I wonder if I'll remember the past two hours when my memories get updated.

Anyway, the game started.

Raccoon Tail went to get us some drinks and snacks, so the remaining four of us played.

I had played Ludo through online apps before, but never face-to-face with other people. They all knew the rules already, so we began rolling the dice.

I went last, after the first three all failed to roll a six or a one.

Alright...let's end this.

"Heh...I win."

I smirked as I weighed the dice in my palm, rolling it around to get a feel for it. Okay, here goes...

I rolled a six...

...and another six...

...and another...

...

...

Five minutes later, I was done, without ever ending my first turn.

If you can get a feel for the exact weight and balance of a dice, you can roll it onto the exact side you want with a some practice...it does require a lot of control, it takes a while to get the hang of, and it...is admittedly a waste of time.

"Heh...those hours upon hours I spent practicing rolling dice paid off after all...nice," I smirked, as I moved my fourth and final piece to home, before stretching up my arms, "Ahh, that felt good!"

"...that was cool," Remarked Sleepy-Face, his expression remaining unchanged though.

"Oh, uh...thanks," I replied sheepishly.

I wasn't used to responding to compliments, it was kinda awkward.

"Hey, Little Kuro, you should loosen your belt and straps a bit, you'll be growing any minute now," Said Persia, after glancing at a mechanical clock in the room.

Oh, right...good point.

I began to loosen them, when suddenly everything went black again...

...

...

Huh...what just happened? I was back in the Petronas Twin Tower.

Had that been a dream?

No...before I could think, time suddenly felt like it was fast-forwarding rapidly, days going by in microseconds, until...a year went by in the blink of an eye and suddenly...I was inside a hotel room in the Caribbean, high on weed and watching anime.

The next thing I knew, I was back in the room, surrounded by Persia and the others.

Oh, I see...that was my memories updating. That felt really, really disconcerting.

Some areas of my body felt really tight...oh, I hadn't loosened all the straps before it happened. I quickly loosened them and let out a sigh.

"That felt...really fuckin' weird," I groaned, running my head.

"That was fascinating...we literally watched you grow in a few seconds, Miss Elina's Spell Scrolls are seriously incredible!" Wowed Raccoon Tail in amazement.

...I can't hold a grudge right now since I don't have the memories to do so, but when the me of this world is back to normal...he'll probably want to kill this Elina person...assuming that he hadn't changed too drastically from this version of me.

Anyway...

"...do you have any weed? The last thing I was doing in my current memories was getting high on a beach in Jamaica while watching Devilman Cryb-."

"Hey, I could go for some weed too," Chimed in Sleepy-Face, a hint of slight enthusiasm invading his deadpan tone.

"Hm, yeah I think I should have some left. Alright, I'll go get it!" Declared Raccoon Tail, standing up and heading towards his closet.

"Uh...what is 'Jamaica'?" Inquired Key, looking a bit confused.

"O-oh...uh i-it's, um-," He began nervously, tensing up as she asked him.

"Oh, it's an island in my world...or I guess technically, the me of this world's previous worl...," I replied, trailing off as Persia and Raccoon Tail looked at me with alarmed expressions, "Uh, what's wrong?"

"Previous world? What?"

Wait, am I not supposed to mention that?

Persia knew about it, and Raccoon Tail knew what a Tsundere was...I just assumed the other two knew too.

"Are you guys hiding something," Said Sleepy-Face, saying it more like a statement that a question.

So, I'm not supposed to say anything, huh...

...I'm gonna go for it.

"I reincarnated here from another world...though this me doesn't remember, I'm still alive in my old world in my current memories," I replied, unable to resist the temptation.

"Dude-!"

"Oh, no...!" Persia closed her eyes as her cat ears twitched, before slowly opening them and peeking out nervously, "...oh good, no divine intervention this time."

She let out a sigh of relief.

...huh? Divine intervention? Wonder what the story behind that was?

"...for real?" Asked Sleepy-Face, his expression changing for the first time since I'd seen him, into one of surprise.

"That's...hard to believe. Rai?"

Redhead turned to Raccoon Tail with an inquiring look.

"Uh, w-well it's...yeah, okay...it's true. Actually, I'm the same, I'm also from a different world before reincarnating here," He reluctantly admitted sheepishly.

The two of them seemed to be having trouble processing all this.

"...this is a lot to take in," Muttered Redhead, blinking wide-eyed.

"A-anyway, we should stop talking about this while we're ahead...," Persia suggested nervously, glancing around her.

"Yeah, good idea. Talking about it is kinda taboo, so, you know...don't tell anyone else. Even my parents and sister don't know this about me."

The other two nodded, looking like they were still trying to process what they'd just learnt.

Another awkward silence filled the room, as no one said a word...

"So, uh...weed?" I inquired suggestively.

"Hm? Oh, right...yeah, let's smoke up!"

...

...

Half an hour and a handful of joints later, uh...never mind, I forgot what I was going to say.

Sleepy-Face was, well...asleep.

The others were all staring off into space with red eyes. I was pretty high too, though it was a bit annoying that I had to keep making sure that this body's Healing Factor was adequately suppressed.

"Hey, wait...what did you say you were watching in Jamaica, again?" Suddenly inquired Raccoon Tail.

"Hm? Oh, uh...Devilman Cry-."

"Oh, I love that anime! It was so good! What did you think of the endin-?"

"Dunno...at the point where my current memories end, I haven't finished it yet...the last scene I watched was the part where the main character, uh...paints the ceiling white in his sleep. No spoilers."

He looked at me in confusion for a moment.

"Huh, what scene was tha-...oh, wait...ohh, that scene..."

His eyes widened as he realized which part I was talking about.

"Too bad this world doesn't have music players, that'd be nice right now," I sighed, as my head felt like it was floating.

"Oh...wait, I got something for that," Replied Raccoon Tail, stumbling towards a shelf and picking up a box.

He opened it, revealing...

"Oh, is that one of those music box thingies that you wind up to play lullabies or something?" I inquired, squinting at it.

I had seen those things in old-school movies and TV shows...never actually seen one in real life though.

"Yeah...something like that, they're a pretty popular item in this world," He answered, stifling a yawn as he wound up the handle on the side.

He then placed it down in the middle, and a soothing, tinkling tune began playing from it.

"That's making me sleepy...," Yawned Sleepy-Face, without opening his eyes.

"Oh...you were awake?" I remarked in surprise.

The way he had been breathing had sounded like he had been fast asleep. How slow is this guy's resting heart rate, anyway!?

"Yes, I was just closing my eyes to better enjoy that floaty feeling," He yawned again, rubbing his eyes.

Everyone was in their own little world, it felt really peaceful and pleasant. I looked around at the four around me, and a strange feeling filled my chest.

The me in this world sure has it good, huh...

Wait...am I jealous of...myself?

Heh...well, isn't that just great?

It was really starting to drive home just how hollow my life actually is- or, was...

I don't think I've ever felt this at ease before, I had willingly dropped my guard against people who, as far as this version of me is concerned, may as well be strangers...

Snap out of it...!

This isn't someone else's life to be jealous of...this was my future- or rather, my present. This version of me was just a spectre of my present self anyway...I'll be gone in a few hours.

As my conflicted thoughts flowed through my head, I slowly dozed off, feeling a bit drowsy...

...

...

I wasn't out for long, as I unconsciously stopped suppressing the Healing Factor, waking up as I rapidly sobered up.

Huh...how long was I out?

I glanced around, the others all had dozed off too, except Redhead, who was just sort of staring absent-mindedly at Raccoon Tail.

I looked at the clock...looks like I had about twenty minutes left before I get updated by a year.

On another note, the whites of Redhead's eyes were almost matching her hair, she looked really, really high.

I decided to mess with her a bit.

"Hi, how are you?"

"Hm? What? Uh, I'm okay-."

"No, you heard me wrong, I said...how high are you?"

"Wait, no...you said 'hi, how high are'- uh, no that wasn't it...," She muttered, looking confused as she got tongue tied while trying to figure out what I said.

Heh...can't beat the classics.

I stood up and walked over to the small table in the room, pouring myself a glass of water. My throat had gotten pretty dry. I let out a sigh of relief as I took a swig...ahh, nothing beats a gulp of water when you're really thirsty.

Redhead had begun to doze off too, all four of them were asleep now.

Too bad I had sobered up, I wouldn't have minded napping till I grow again...I wonder what I'll be like after that happens. There were only a few differences between my previous fifteen year old and current sixteen year old selves, I hadn't changed that much that year, besides little stuff like skill improvements, physical growth, a higher kill count, and the fact that I had tried weed.

I wonder how much I change over the next year...

"Hey, wait a second...I can't believe this is only just occurring to me, but...I really died at just around 19 years old? I wonder if I've told them how I died," I muttered to myself.

Well...guess I'll find out soon enough. This really was a bizarre experience...

I went back to the spot I had been sitting and plopped back down again, waiting for the clock to run out.

Everyone was asleep, so I decided to just wait it out quietly...I mean, it's not like I'll forget about the past four hours when I get 'updated', so no need to make a big deal about it.

I'll ask Persia about my death after a little while.

I loosened the straps on my outfit as I waited, staring at the ticking clock.

Fifteen minutes left...

...fourteen...

...ten...

...seven...

...this is kinda nerve-wracking.

It doesn't hurt or anything, but the feeling of your memories updating by a whole year in a matter of seconds was a very uncomfortable and disconcerting one.

Five more minutes.

With time almost up, I looked at the four people around me again.

Raccoon Ta- or rather, Rai, was a bit on the overly enthusiastic side, but he seemed nice enough. Key had a short fuse, and I was definitely a bit peeved over the whole thing at the training hall, but I guess she wasn't all that bad either. Azyl was hard to read, but his laidback presence was kinda relaxing to be around.

As for Persia...was a girl this sweet and beautiful seriously my girlfriend?

Wow...way to go, me of this world.

"I gotta admit...my life here seems to be pretty amazing. Hope you aren't taking this life for granted, me of this world...," I mumbled quietly, as I felt my head begin to get foggy.

Oh, looks like it's happening...

...

...

I was back in the hotel...and suddenly, time hit the fast-forward button again, months passing by in seconds, the memories flashing into my brain...

...

...

...I was about to take out my target...

...wait, I'm surrounded...an ambush...sleeping gas...I passed out...

...

...

...I was in a...lab?

...

...I was restrained...on an operating table...my body wasn't listening...maybe a muscle relaxant...

...

...

...they were dissecting me...while I was awake...no anesthetic...stop...it hurts...

...someone...help me...

...

...oh, wait...I don't have anyone in my life who would bother to help me...

...

...

...now they're electrocuting me...

...

...its only been one day...

...

...

...they're injecting something into me...

...

...

...I don't want to lose my mind...

...I know...

...I'll keep track of the days and what happens on each day and repeat them in my head, to remain sane and distract myself from the pain...

...

...

...

...

...it's been ten days...today I got dissected twice, electrocuted four times, and had five injections...

...

...

...

...why won't they just kill me already...

...

...

...it's been twenty-five days...today I got dissected thrice, electrocuted twice, and had five injections...

...

...

...

...please...

...

...just kill me already...

...

...

...it's been...

...

...

...

.

.

.

"...it's been forty-three days...today I got dissected twice, electrocuted five times, and had seven injections...it's been forty-three days...today I got dissected twice, electrocuted..."

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Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Don't forget to vote, and feel free to leave a comment, I appreciate any and all feedback and criticism! Also, check out my Instagram account @aimdaqs for posts relating to this book.