Guard With a Knife

"Last night, the Duke won the first game he joined the Chicago Bulls by a big score. According to inside information, the Duke disappeared into the locker room during the halftime break. And the ecstasy has been lingering inside the arena. Cat meowing...A player in Atlanta, who did not want to be named, said that they heard the voice of an A-list Hollywood actress in the locker room. The voice may be soft or high-pitched, but it is definitely not in a normal environment..."

When MTV used ambiguous reports that Snoopy had sex with a certain Hollywood actress in a mysterious room at the United Center during the intermission. It is conceivable how exaggerated the messages on the Internet and the reports in the street newspapers will be.

In fact, this matter has detonated everyone's nerves.

Gossip fans on the Internet have waited too long. The American entertainment industry has been calm recently. Even Justin Bieber rarely confesses his love to Selena in the media these days. He went to Europe for a tour.

Although the Kardashian family is tirelessly trying to spread some news on their reality TV show to cause everyone to carnival, no one cares about them at all. Even though Kim Kardashian has recently criticized his ex-boyfriend, the famous nfl player Reggie Bush, whose performance on the bed is inversely proportional to his strong body, which made Reggie Bush a little annoyed. He said that his cavernous body can even squirt Kardashian completely overwhelmed with energy. This analogy is a bit funny. Kim Kardashian made fun of him for about ten minutes on her show. She said that maybe he can spray a lot of things, but that thing is as small as the nozzle of a high-pressure water gun for cleaning cars... This design With some knowledge of physics, the smaller the force area, the greater the pressure....

It's unbelievable that Kim Kardashian can come up with such scientifically literate words. But then, she began to emphasize again: "In the future, I am not going to date a football player. I am going to find a basketball player."

Everyone knew that she was speaking to Duke Snoopy. But there are still a large group of basketball players who are crazy about it. They really want to prove to Kim Kardashian that they have a large area of ​​force and a lot of pressure!

Of course, no one will care about these uneducated news except themselves.

People only care about the matter of the Duke.

Its appearance even makes the trailer of "Iron Man 2" dull, and people are obviously more concerned about who is the first-line Hollywood female star who is rumored to be able to make cat noises.

"We did find something unusual in a small room next to the visiting team's dressing room. In fact, this room has been permanently marked as Snoopy's exclusive lounge. There is not a small space in there. If Your Excellency the Duke wants to do something, and the conditions are completely allowed. And the ventilation duct in that house is connected to the visiting team's locker room, and it is not closed. So, the movement here can indeed be heard from there!"

As a United Center employee adjusts his hair from a three-six to a four-six for the camera, he looks so keen to perform in front of the camera that he even physically describes the poses that might occur.

The guy named Eisen was told to fire the afternoon he appeared on Chicago TV, and Gary Foreman didn't like a staffer who betrayed a team leader on camera. Although he was also very curious about whether His Excellency the Duke had any eye-catching physical contact with a certain first-line Hollywood female star in that small room.

Anyway, everyone is now involved in this lively and extraordinary gossip event. The names of almost every duchess lady who had ever been involved with the duke were read out.

Currently, Emma Stone and Anne Hathaway received the highest votes.

Emma Stone because she is the most recent duchess lady to make a public appearance with the duke, beating Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez backstage at the awards show in her debut and sparking the entire Beverly Hills boulevard The traffic was paralyzed, her suspicion is of course the biggest, and she is currently working in Illinois.

As for the suspicion of Anne Hathaway, it was because she posted a photo wearing the Bulls No. 10 jersey on her Facebook page that night, which made people speculate that she would definitely go to the United Center Arena. Moreover, she is considered to be the most powerful contender for Catwoman in the recent Spider-Man filmed by Warner.

"Anne Hathaway must be doing simulation training for new roles. She was never a fan of the method school, she was an experiential actor."

Analysis of "Entertainment Headlines".

Among these voices, Scarlett Johansson, who was photographed appearing in the United Center Arena, took the third place.

"It seems absurd."

Scarlett felt ridiculous about the instant voting rankings on the Internet, and turned around to try to seek justice from the Duke.

The Duke is temporarily renting the small town of Kenilworth in the northern lakeside area of ​​Chicago. This is the second richest town in the United States according to real estate agents. It is only a 30-minute drive from downtown Chicago. For this reason, the agent named Michael even He did not forget to ridicule the god of basketball because of this. He thought that Jordan's luxurious manor was too far away from the urban area, and it was not worth 29 million US dollars at all. Maybe it could only be sold for half of the price in the end.

Afterwards, he was proud of the duke who rented this single-family villa at a price of 5,000 dollars a month. He believed that Snoopy spent the money in the right place, and he would definitely become the new richest man in basketball surpassing Michael Jordan in the future. , And led the Bulls to a great dynasty with more than six championships.

His brilliant mouth did not get much appreciation from the Duke. He just signed a contract with the help of Derrick Rose and moved in quickly.

And then that night, Ms. Scarlett Johansson was there as hostess.

She started to arrange dinner for the Duke, adjusted the hot water, and then bent down in the bathroom again.

She enjoyed everything here, except the goddamn spring bed.

"It's really ridiculous. No one paid attention to me getting a triple-double, and no one paid attention to Derek's career high score. The first time we worked together was blurred out of focus!"

His Excellency the Duke spread his palms, he finally realized that his basketball career had been diluted a lot due to gossip and gossip.

This was supposed to be a big story, but now people just want to know who is that Hollywood A-list actress and how charming is her meowing sound?

And what makes Snoopy even more unacceptable is that those commentators who seem to have nothing to do and like to show off their basketball knowledge can still pick bones from such a classic game.

"...who knows what Snoopy was doing between halftime and the first half of the third quarter? But I'm sure the Bulls would be a loser if they tried to replicate that. Snoopy was absolutely nothing like Reggie Miller. Advertised shooter talent, his three-point shooting percentage can not always be 5 of 7 shots. In fact, he is a star who needs the ball, and his cooperation with Derrick Rose is two inefficient The combination of stars. They will never reach the height of Jordan Pippen, they are just a weakened version of Iverson and Anthony!"

Bill Simmons must be crazy.

Snoopy had the feeling that the veteran Celtics fan must have had mush in his head.

And just as he was trying to bounce off the damned spring bed to shower, his phone rang.

Miley Cyrus' call came in.

That doesn't sound like good news at all. Even though its ringtone sounds like any other phone.

...

【More tonight】

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