Guild Wars



"Haha, obroni four ye gymie gymie!!" (TL: This white boy is weird/retarded) 

A tall boy with charcoal colored skin slapped down on a light skinned boy who was half a head shorter than him. The larger boy was broad and looked to be easily 17 years old despite only being around 10 years old, which was actually quite common in this locale. 

Welcome to 'Sub-Saharan' Africa, where poverty and endless hardship was mixed with brutal foreign exploitation and local corruption to form a hopeless situation of indirect slavery. 

However despite all this, it was a placed that was filled with mirth and life. After all, everywhere you looked around you was shitty and everyone around you was going through the same thing, so why bother and mope? 

Better to find amusement in all things and anything, leading to the shocking contrast of a despairing society yet individuals who were amused by the littlest thing and had possibly the best mental health in the world. 

In this small school located in the capital of the proud, beautiful, wonderful and yet shamelessly corrupt country called Ghana, was an orphanage in one of the most populated areas of the state. 

In this orphanage were a group of 4 dark-skinned boys and different ages and looks crowded around a fairer boy who had a cold look on his face. He glanced at the fellow who pushed him down and then rose to his feet, patting himself down. 

"Charley, your man vex oo haha." (TL: Haha, it seems like this guy is angry) 

One of the other boys joked with crescent moon eyes, finding the whole thing funny. He was around the same age as the fair-skinned boy and wore hand me downs that were donated to the orphanage yearly. 

"Ibi normal, you go like make dem push you for floor?" (TL: Its normal, would you like it if you were pushed onto the floor?) 

Another one of the boys frowned as he folded his arms and did not seem too happy with the whole thing. He was lanky and seemed to have a serious demeanor since he wore glasses. 

"Oh come on, we all went through this when we first got here, or?" the fourth and final boy who was extremely short and had relatively good looking features among them seemed to smile as he bounced a basketball around. 

"Ah chale, you bore?" (TL: Oh really, are you angry?) 

The first boy, the large one, leaned forward with a slightly amused smile. There was no real malice behind his words or actions, but there was definitely a boyish hint of provocation. 

(Author's Note: In local culture, asking someone if they are angry in such a manner as above is the equivalent to the famous western 'are you a chicken' provocation. Even if you are angry, you dare not say it and have to act like a Chinese MC, indifferent and neither servile nor overbearing… literally.) 

"Pff, sure, whatever makes you happy big guy." The fair skinned boy replied in a thick African accent similar to theirs, shocking the group. 

"Yooo, you're a local! I thought you were an abandoned foreigner or something man." The short and handsome boy exclaimed with shock, missing his basketball's return. 

"What's your name brother?" The lanky fellow with glasses asked. 

"Me? I am Gage. I don't have a last name because I refuse to acknowledge that fucking idiot as my father neither do I care much about my 'pitiful' mother." The fair-skinned boy replied confidently. 

Rather than be miffed by his swords, the eyes of the fellow orphans shined and they nodded. In order, more develop countries, the majority of orphans were from parents who were killed or harmed severely, forcing them to send their kids to the orphanage. 

However, here in this country, the majority of orphans were formed from a mixture of irresponsible sexual practices, lack of accountability and poverty to raise the child, so the children were often just dumped on the orphanage while the parents continued their lives just fine, and might even spit out a few more. 

As such, their feelings towards 'parents' and 'parenthood' had long been darkened. Many did not desire or care for adoption, for what if the new parents abandoned them again? 

And that was the best case scenario. Some 'parents' would pickily select a few kids and then adopt them for labor, sexual prostitution or organ harvesting. 

Most kids here just wanted to survive until they were adult and then go out there to fight for a living for themselves away from the abusive caretakers who embezzled the little government money and donations that came in. 

"Hello Gage, I am Darlington." The large boy who pushed him earlier laughed carefreely. 

"My name is Etornam." The lanky boy with the glasses introduced with a smile. 

"Yo, I'm Kwamena." The short and handsome fellow waved casually while holding his basketball in hand. 

"I am Yaw." The boy with crescent moon shaped eyes greeted with a playful salute while glancing at Gage up and down. 

The five boys then began to chat about their plans for the future as well as their hopes and dreams. It took no time for them to become fast friends and they became inseparable in this small world of their that involved a lot of suffering and pain. 

.....................….. 

"…and we all grew up to become leaders of society, great men who would change the world from the ground up. The end!" 

"Gage, can you not always talk about our first meeting like that?Its so cringe!" Kwamena complained, having gone from a short boy to a 5 foot 8 young man with extremely handsome features and olive colored skin that made the girls go crazy. 

"Don't mind this fellow, Ive always said it. He fell on his head as a child and then instead of looking for the dragon balls, he ended up swallowing retard balls!" Darlington insulted with a smile. 

He was still burly and had now shaved his head bald while keeping a thick and lush beard that connected with a neatly trimmed mustache. 

"Haha, Gage you freak. Why do you keep mentioning my eyes goddammit. Why don't you ever mention the fact that my dick is the biggest out of us 5?" Yaw complained with an angry laugh. 

He was of average height 

"That story is quite inspiring. I think we should write a book about our escapades back then." Etornam suggested with a push of his glasses, his elegant posture in his white suit catching the eye of passersby. 

The group were catching up in a local lounge that was known for its opulence in the depths of the city. Here, the rich among the poor came to eat, drink and laugh that they had the blessing of foreign money that when converted to local currency, made them rich like kings. 

"Etornam, are you serious? You want us to write about the crazy shit we did back then? What about your company, do you want it to be razed to the ground?" Gage asked with a playful smile. 

Gage had changed the most out of them. From a scrawny young body with barely discernible features from foreigners, he had grown into a mildly handsome young man with yellowish skin, or what modern youth called 'prime fuckboy skin'. 

He was tall at around 6 foot 2 nearing 6 foot 3, and his natural born blonde hair from his father had been permanently dyed into a black color much like the majority of Africans. 

As for his light green eyes, there was nothing he could do about that and his brothers had long dissuaded him from wearing contacts as they claimed it was gay. 

He liked to wear dark colors because they highlighted his light skin and increased his charm exponentially, which was necessary for gage. 

For you see, he was a special type of man. 

He was a Cardinal of the Adonitology religion! 

That's right, this fellow here worshiped the God of Booty and worshiped all booties of the world! 

His heart was pure, his mind was focused and his will was firm! 

Many had questioned him for his decision to partake in this path, but he never faltered nor shook! After all, how could he fail when he lived on the continents with the largest demographic of beautifully shaped buttocks? 

Africa had many problems but the lack of titty and booty was not one of them. 7 out of every 10 women you see passing by on the street had an ass shaped by a sculptor itself and some even had them so big that they needed custom clothing. 

If that was just it, then it would not be enough, but African ladies had the curviest bodies Gage had ever seen, and the current him had traveled the world with his brothers to sample booties form all around before coming back home. 

They were more than connoisseurs, they were professors with PHDs in the study of booty and Gage was indisputably a man who took his religion more serious than his life!