I Heard You Are an Alien

In order to prevent the police uncle from entering the detention center on charges of "indecent assault," Yi Ti had to stop and keep a distance from the other party.

"Excuse me ..."

"do not come!"

"I haven't passed ... I want to ask ..."

"leave me alone!"

Yi Yi Ti: "..." What did she do to him?

At this moment, a sudden flash of light flashed through her mind.

"what!"

"Lu Kong? Are you Lu Kong?"

The young man froze, and a complex look of joy and grief mixed with fear appeared on his face: "... Do you remember me?"

Yi Yi Ti: "..." Don't you remember?

They are high school classmates anyway, although they have different classes in the same school. However, the person wrote a letter to her that year, which was also the first love letter in her life, and then ... there was no more.

She was too young at the time, and under the coax of her brother, she gave him the love letter. Later, when he met Lu Kong, he became what he is now. When he saw her, he couldn't help yelling and screaming hard to escape, and he was afraid to approach. And shortly after, he transferred. In fact, she was really curious about what the brother had done to the guy that year.

"Why are you here?" Lu Kong felt that he should just listen to A Jiang's words and leave decisively, otherwise how could he meet his biggest nightmare in life! TAT

"This is my store." Yi Ti pointed to the flower shop behind him, "how could you be here?" And was wearing that strange clothes ...

"Oh, huh, I'm just passing by." Lu Kong felt the need to divide the city into "dangerous areas." He tried to get up from the ground and took a few steps back. "Well, just make soy sauce, don't care about me. . "Run away decisively.

Yi Yi Ti: "..."

After a few steps, he stopped again.

No reason, because Ajan sitting on his shoulder said something like this--

"She smells like that little monster."

Yi Yiti was speechless, and suddenly she saw someone walking backwards, and smiled at her rather ugly: "Yi, I want to ask you something."

"Okay." She nodded and pointed to the store. "Go in and sit?"

"Go in, go in?" Lu Kong's legs softened.

"Relax, my brother is not here."

"Really?" The youth's voice changed completely with excitement.

Yi Yi Ti: "..." So, brother, what kind of heavy psychological shadow do you leave for others?

So, after Yi Ti promised that “Yi Shao wo n’t know about it”, Lu Kong wiped the sweat from his head, and incidentally patted the ash on his buttocks. He followed Yi Ti into the shop in a decent manner. .

"Drink tea? Or something else?"

"Tea will do."

After I sat down, he looked around for a moment, then turned his head to look at the cat squatting on the table, and the latter shook his head to signal that there was no smell of that little monster in the shop.

"You have a good environment here."

"I like it here too." Yi Ti came over with two cups of green tea and put it on the table.

Lu Lukong looked down at the tea and was happy: "Are you rich?" During the talk, he sniffed deeply and shook his head. "Good tea, unfortunately, I can't make it."

Yi Yi Ti: "..." Hey, is it really okay to hit the host in the face?

However, after what happened just now, this dear has already equated with "two" in her mind, so no matter what he does, she can calmly accept it.

Yi Ti, who was thinking so, glanced at the tea in her hand. This was left by the master. She didn't understand the thing, but just brewed some from time to time to drink based on the principle of "no waste". It now seemed that she was violent.

"By the way, I heard someone say that you are a teacher now." Lu Kong asked curiously, "How did you open a flower shop?"

"Maybe it's because I don't have much talent for being a teacher." Yi Ti spread his hand and asked, "You are the only one who suddenly changed school at that time. Where did you go to study after that?"

别 "Don't mention it," Lu Kong said with a gloomy expression when he said this, "I was taken home by my grandfather ... forcing my grandfather to return to the high school near my hometown. Instead of letting me inherit my family business while studying."

"Inherit the family business?"

"That's it." The young man showed the robe on his lower body. "Yes," he found a business card from his arms, and handed it to Yi Ti. "This is for you. You or your friends can find it if you need it." Me, I give you 20% off. "

Yi Ti took the business card with both hands, and at the first sight, he sweated, because of his unreliable names-Orthodox Taoist preachers, the 37th generation of the Lingshan School (in competition for the post), Top Ten Outstanding Young Men (Candidates) ...

Let's look at the scope of the business again-things like red and white, catching ghosts and monsters, looking at feng shui, antique identification, bodyguard secrets, massage masters, dating experts, divorce pushers, posing as dads, helping to sign test paper names, helping with winter and summer homework ... ...

"This range is ... broad enough." I can hardly see the edge.

那 "Of course," Lu Kong proudly raised his thumb and pointed at himself. "Professional and trustworthy."

"... hehe." She really didn't know what to say except this.

"A guest remembered to introduce it to me." Lu Kong drank another tea and poured out bitter water. "You don't know, the people of the country today, lack of faith, they don't believe in evil at all! How good it is to believe in a teaching, and to have more spiritual trust. Ah! The key is to increase business for me! Poor me to cultivate the mountain. I originally thought that I could not be regarded as the richest man in the world in my own capacity. At least I would become the general manager, serve as the CEO, marry Bai Fumei, and move towards the pinnacle of life ... "

`` Goo-- ''

Lu Kong covered his stomach with both hands, and his expression instantly became awkward.

的 The cat squatting at the table turned his head, apparently could not bear to see someone look shameful.

Yi Yi Ti tried to pretend not to hear.

`` Goo-- ''

Lu Kong slaps his stomach twice, and hates the iron and goes on to say: "Who knows that the fortune teller was kicked out at the flyover ... I ate only one bowl of instant noodle last night. I haven't eaten it this morning ..." TAT

Bian Yi Ti Fu amounted: "I invite you to eat." How did you say that this guy was considered a man of the year in the school, how did he get down to this sad point? Sure enough, time is a killing knife.

"Really?"

"Hmm." She nodded. "What would you like to eat?"

"Yi Ti!" The young man burst into tears with excitement, grasping her little hands, "I think I am in love with you again soon! You are such a good person!"

If you only feel ashamed when you hear the first half of the sentence, Yi Ti will be black when you hear the second half of the sentence, and give her a nice card again? She twitched the corners of her mouth and silently spit out two words: "Yi Shao."

"Ah, ah, ah, I'm wrong, I won't dare!" Hold your head!

Yi Yiti took out the phone and asked, "What to eat? I'll help you." The breakfast shop near the school is usually open until noon or even afternoon, so even if it's more than ten o'clock, there are still things to sell.

咳 "Cough, I eat a little bit, is it okay?"

"It's all right."

"I want a cage of Xiaolongbao, a cage of steamed dumplings, ten meat buns, ten churros, and two cups of soy milk."

"..." The corners of Yi Ti's eyes were drawn, and the ghost sent out a sentence, "Do you want noodles?"

还有 "And this one? Then give me another bowl of chaos and a bowl of shredded pork noodles. Add more onions instead of spicy."

The cat on the table simply lay down, covered his face with his hands, and did not want to look at his contractor anymore-it was too shameful! Sure enough, it's better to abandon it? !!

对 "Yes, what is your cat going to eat?" Yi Ti asked again.

"It was served inside when I ordered it." Lu Kong held the cat on the table in his arms, and twitched his two hairs, his expression softened instantly. "We are good brothers and we share happiness Difficult to share. "

"Really." Yi Ti looked at his expression, and suddenly changed his mood from solitude to relief, "I remember that this shop still sells delicious dried fish. Would you like a serving?"

"Two copies." Lu Kong stretched out his fingers and made a "two" gesture, smiling brightly, "I want to eat too."

"..."

As a result, this unexpected meeting between Yi Ti and her old classmates suddenly turned into a dinner for the other party. This made her feel a little bit more interesting while she was still in awe.

I have to say that Lu Kong didn't lie to her, it seems that she was hungry for a long time, and ate it. However, while eating the noodles sloppyly, he quickly broke apart Xiaolongbao and meat buns. The meat inside was in the presence of his buddies, and the buns were skinned to himself ... This kind of scene may be strange in Yi Ti There was a touch of warmth in his eyes.

After about half an hour.

Lu hollow hugged his stomach and sat down on the chair contentedly with his legs stretched straight, and sighed intoxicatedly: "So happy ..." The cat lying on his leg did the same, with his four legs spread out, It makes people feel that they can't help but look at it.

"You're too exaggerated?" Yi Ti filled his cup with boiling water and said jokingly, "Come, drink some tea and shave oil."

"I don't want to shave." Lu Kong patted his stomach, "I don't know when we can have oil next time."

Yi Yiti said silently, "Aren't you ..."

"That's right." Lu Kong said with a **** face, "None of the companies in this year can do well."

"Isn't your business very wide?"

The young man shook his head and sighed: "The competitive pressure is too great! For example, Feng Shui, a red and white thing, and many customers would rather believe the old liar than the kind of talented man with real materials."

Yi Yi Ti: "..." At least he has to be trusted all over him?

"The secret guard of the bodyguard actually needs a relevant professional certificate. The fake certificate I bought for 300 yuan was actually evaluated as too low in education!"

Yi Yi Ti: "..." This guy completely missed the point?

"Apply for a masseur, there are always people who move my feet manually, and once there is a big man ... keke, I won't mention it."

Yun Yi Ti: "..." Keke, in fact this can be mentioned.

"The relationship between men and women is too complicated these years. I haven't succeeded in helping people date or divorce. Hey, in the end, I can only make money for students." Lu Kong sighed. Ah! Ever since a teacher asked me, "The father of the three children in our class is you, why do you have different surnames?", I am no longer trusted by students and friends. "

Yi Yiti was almost spraying, but considering that it didn't seem to be kind, she tried to comfort him: "At least you can help the students with their homework?"

"Don't mention it." It's okay not to say, and Lu Kong looked awkward, "What is the primary problem of elementary school students' homework! What do you think of it-feet minus shoes and grass plus grass? ? "

Yi Yi Ti: "... is this a math problem?"

"Language."

"Uh ..."

"down to earth!"

"..."

"Another one, dissect the frog and keep only two thirds of the front!"

"Is this also a language question?" Maybe it's too scary, right?

"There is no end!"

"Do you want to come again?"

"Forget it ..." Yi Ti was helpless, what kind of pitfalls do elementary school students do now?

"You see, the most horrible thing is, I racked my brains to finish the homework. The kid actually said," You are too slow to do your homework, I bought the ice cream. "Finally, I only gave me ten yuan, and I just stared He glanced at him, and three or four adults ran over with a kitchen knife and tried desperately with me, thinking that I had bullied their son. The problem was that the one being bullied was me! "

"..."

"The kid was so cunning. He actually opened a home loan service. Five cents a day is much cheaper than doing it on my behalf. No one has ever patronized me since then."

Lu Kong said here, almost leaving tears of sadness.

Yi Yiti endured and endured, finally did not hold back, and reached out and patted his shoulder gently: "You ... Journey ..."

"..." TAT