I Screwed the Novel's Plot
26 Ch. 26: Memories [1]
I blinked my eyelids a few times before gradually opening them. However, what greeted me was just complete darkness.
'So... Am I blind now?'
Unbothered to get up, I raised my right hand but surprisingly, I could see my hand and my eyebrows furrowed involuntarily.
Ah, It seemed I wasn't blind. I just died. But, what killed me? Was it Alexander? Or because I lost too much blood? Hmm, how unfortunate, I really enjoyed the privilege I got as a Prince, though. There was also... my mother.
"Haaa..."
I sighed and covered my face when guilt crept through my mind. I felt so awful when I remembered that I couldn't fulfill my promise to return to her.
Removing my hand, I stared into the darkness above. I bit my lower lip and tried my best to hold back my tears.
'It's over now. I'm dead.'
Someone said that 'You will realize a person's value after that one is gone.' And now, I realized how stupid and how naive I was, instead of being reluctant to be pampered by my mother, I should have opened up to her.
I should have let her embrace me, let her caress my face, let her stroke my hair, let her kiss my forehead and cheeks. I should have done that because deep down in my heart, I yearned for them. It was just that my heart and mind didn't sync.
What made me more frustrated was, I realized how I listened to my head rather than my feelings, which was stupidity. Somehow, even by now, I missed her nagging.
But, it was over, right? We would never be able to meet again and unknowingly, my tears slid down my face.
"Ah, shit."
I hurriedly wiped them off my face. I wondered how my mother would react when she received news that I had died.
'Will she be sad? Will she mourn over my death?'
The corners of my lips tugged involuntarily, what a silly question. Of course, she would without a doubt grieve and regret rapidly crawled into my heart.
'I'm sorry for making you sad. I'm sorry for making you cry. It's my fault. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, mom…'
I exhaled a long deep breath to calm myself and after blankly gazing at the darkness above for quite some time, I frowned.
'But, where is this? Is this the underworld? Is this the afterlife? Is this heaven?'
Nah, I didn't think this was heaven because paradise wouldn't be this dark.
'I had no idea where this is but unlike Gaia, I can't sense any mana here.'
A bright light suddenly radiated beside me and my head automatically turned toward it. Wrinkles formed on my forehead the moment a giant square light popped out of nowhere.
I sat and tried to reach for the light but I was blocked by something invisible. The light dimmed and a scene appeared, somehow reminding me of watching movies in the theater.
The screen revealed an architecture of a fortress, then it changed to a white-haired boy who held a woman's hand. I smiled bitterly when I acknowledged who they were. That woman was none other than my mother and that boy--no, since I had died.
'I'm no longer Damian Atreilight.'
Honestly speaking, my heart burned with jealousy when I witnessed how happy they were. I wish I could be like that, too.
"Haa…"
I sighed once again whilst massaging my nose bridge. After collecting myself, I returned to the screen once more. Damian and Theresa took a stroll whilst holding hands near the wall.
The boy looked around, his face tinged with curiosity as he saw many knights passing back and forth. While Damian was busy with his world, suddenly, someone pushed him.
Right after he fell on his butt, a loud sound rang out followed by debris landing right in front of him and red liquid splattered on Damian's face.
Screams filled the space, the peaceful fortress turned upside down and dust covered the surroundings. Realizing that his mother was not by his side, Damian immediately got up and searched for her in the fog of dirt.
"Mom!"
He stopped as he stepped on something wet, he looked down and a bright red color came into view. His heart skipped a beat when his azure eyes traced the source of the blood. There, he found a hand that wasn't buried by debris; a familiar hand that he held a few seconds ago.
Damian's mind went blank, not only his but I was too. The boy's expression turned horrified after he regained his senses. He walked and knelt in front of his mother's hand.
"N-No... Mom…"
His trembling hands held Theresa's lifeless hand. Tears rolled down his face.
"I-I will get you out of there, mom. Don't worry."
As he was not in his right mind, Damian couldn't cast his Elemental out and somehow it showed how shaken he was. After many failed attempts, he gave up and decided to move the debris with his tiny little hands.
"Mom, please wait."
However, a hand pulled him. He turned his head and found his grandfather, Gideon. He grabbed and shook the man's body with tears running down his face uncontrollably.
"Grand--Grandpa... Mom--mom is buried. Please, please help her."
Instead of answering, Gideon just shook his head.
"No… no… mom…"
Sobs escaped from Damian's mouth and he fell to his knees. His wailing grew loud and louder. He knew what death was, but he refused to believe what the truth was.
Tears streamed down Gideon's face and dropped to the ground as he saw his daughter's hand. He knelt and embraced the boy, crying silently.
"Ha. Ha. Ha. AHAHAHA!"
I couldn't help but laugh like crazy and grit my teeth.
–Whack!
I punched the invisible glass in front of me.
'What kind of joke is this?'
Blood flowed down the glass. Even after I used all of my strength, the glass remained unscathed. The scene changed to a black-robed man seen above the destroyed watchtower. The man spun around and walked away leisurely.
–Whack!
–Whack!
–Whack!
Tears gushed out of my eyes and I grit my teeth. Even after punching the invisible glass several times, it was futile.
"Haa… haa… haa…"
My chest heaved up and down as I couldn't vent my anger.
"Why won't this fucking glass break?!"
–Whack!
Red liquid splattered and ran down the mirror.
–Whack!
"Please break! Please!"
–Whack!
"I have to go after that damn man!"
–Whack!
"He's the one responsible for my mother's death!"
–Whack!
"I want revenge!"
–Whack!
"Please!"
–Whack!
"Please!"
–Whack!
"Please get me out of here!"
–Whack!
"Sob, sob."
I leaned my head on the glass and my tears showed no sign of stopping. As I felt desperate, I hit my head on the glass.
–Slammed!
"Why?"
–Slammed!
"Why?"
–Slammed!
"Why?"
–Slammed!
A warm liquid ran down my face. Unfazed by it, I hit my head even harder.
–Slammed!
"Why?"
–Slammed!
My head became damp with blood.
"Why?"
–Slammed!
"Why?"
–Slammed!
–Slammed!
–Slammed!
I banged my head several times while reciting the same words again, and again, and again. Blood splattered everywhere.
"Why won't it break?!"
–Slammed!
As I used all my might and suddenly my vision went blank.
.
.
.
I blinked a few times when light entered my eyes. I was lying on the side facing the big white screen. I just realized that I was still in this 'afterlife' or something.
"Ah..."
I could see the fingers on my hands twisted weirdly and covered with blood. It seemed I broke them while I punched the glass. I tried to move my body but--
"Aargh!"
As if electrocuted, my body shook violently. My body was engulfed in pain like being stabbed by hundreds of thousands of needles. My tears slid down my face.
'Just what the hell is this place?! If I'm already dead, why not just send me to the other side?! Why show me that painful scene?! As if my death was not painful enough, so I have to suffer mentally now?! This is ridiculous.'
Sobs escaped my mouth.
"I don't want to be here."
My tears flowed unstoppably and fell to the ground.
"I want to die."
–Slammed!
"I want to die."
–Slammed!
"I want to die."
–Slammed!
I hit my head as hard as I could and now my head became damp and sticky. Unbothered, I shouted out loud.
"I want to die!"
–Slammed!
And my memory ended there.
.
.
.
I opened my eyes and what welcomed me was still a pitch-dark room and a giant screen beside me. I gritted my teeth.
'Why?! Why am I still here?! I was supposed to be dead! Why?! Please... Someone... Please save me... I don't want to be here.'
I tried to move my head but it wouldn't move, not even in the slightest. I thought I had lost all of my power and I was paralyzed.
But come to think of it, although my fingers were broken and my head was bleeding, I couldn't feel any pain at all, ah, it seemed my whole body had just gone numb.
I glanced at the white screen in front of me. As if it wanted me to watch it, the screen immediately played a scene.
"Ha!"
I scoffed. This was so stupid. It felt like this room was created solely for me. If this was my punishment, then, why not show my life? Why show another Damian's life to me?
'I don't understand. I don't understand a thing at all.'
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