Lord God Investigator

"It's over, it's over... My dreams are shattered just like that. My life is pale, no different from a salted fish!"

Luo Feng's eyes were distracted, he muttered to himself, and sat down on the chair. His whole body seemed to have been drained of bones, and he lay there in a state of despair.

Seeing an aspiring young man so decadent and reduced to a salty fish, Jiu Jianxian was also a little bit embarrassed. After all, he drank a lot of wine in vain, but he pursed his lips and refused to let go. It seemed that the word "immortal fate" was extremely important. Even immortals dare not mess with cause and effect.

After thinking about it, Jiujianxian kindly advised: "Shopkeeper Luo, you won't be so depressed if you don't have the opportunity to become an immortal. There are still many meaningful things to do in life. Just like a poor Taoist, vowing to taste all the fine wines in the world is also a good idea. Pursue."

"Alas..." Luo Feng sighed deeply: "God took away my dreams, drained my soul, and left me only a beautiful skin... It's so sad! But no matter how difficult life is, , I can only grit my teeth and live on, I must find a reason for myself to live."

The Jiujianxian nodded slowly, his impression of Luo Feng changed a bit, and he felt that this man also understood fate and destiny, and was not entangled in it.

"Whatever shopkeeper Luo plans to do in the future, if the old Taoist can do anything, he can help."

Because Luo Feng had been talking nonsense about recruiting troops and raising flags for rebellion, Jiujianxian was also a little worried, fearing that rejecting his request to become an immortal would cause an unprovoked military disaster in the human world. He couldn't help but ask carefully, saying that he was helping, but in fact Still testing.

The Song Dynasty has not yet exhausted its energy. If Luo Fu Shao wants to rebel, he is just fishing for the moon in the water. He will inevitably fail, but it will involve the destruction of countless innocent people. After the military disaster, the land is thousands of miles away, but he has committed a great evil.

"What else can be done?" Luo Feng said with a wry smile: "Being an emperor is meaningless... Being charitable and doing good deeds, building bridges and repairing roads are all useless efforts... The younger generation can just entertain themselves and drag this useless body around. It’s been a lifetime.”

The Jiujianxian breathed a sigh of relief. Hearing this, Rich Young Master Luo wanted to spend money to enjoy himself and become a harmless dandy.

Although being a dandy has no benefit to the world, it does no harm either. In this way, the Jiujianxian will not be involved in the cause and effect, and he immediately feels relieved.

Luo Feng said sarcastically: "The Taoist priest's words just now reminded the juniors that I can follow the Taoist priest's example and find a hobby for myself to pass the time."

"That's great. How about drinking? Let's be drinking buddies. When we have time, we can have a drink together?"

The Jiujianxian licked his lips and asked with a smile. It seemed that he had not drunk enough for Luo Feng. He was thinking of coming back to take advantage of Luo Feng and drink with him in the future.

Luo Feng waved his hand and said: "The Taoist Master is an immortal and can drink a thousand cups without getting drunk. The juniors are mortals. Drinking too much will harm the body, but they cannot learn the hobbies of the Taoist Master in the wine. The hobbies chosen by the juniors are slightly different from the Taoist Priest's hobbies." There are differences, but they are also quite similar.”

Jiu Jianxian was a little disappointed, and a little doubtful in his heart. He couldn't help but ask: "What is the hobby chosen by Shopkeeper Luo? Drinking tea?"

"What's the point of drinking tea? Just fade away like a bird!"

Luo Feng shook his head disdainfully and said: "Since ancient times, drinking and sex have not separated families. The seniors are the immortals in wine. The juniors should imitate the seniors and become evil ghosts in lust. If the Taoist priest drinks a thousand cups and does not get drunk, Luo will spend a night with a thousand people. If the girl doesn't fall, the Taoist priest vows to taste all the fine wines in the world, and Luo vows to sleep with all the beauties in the world... Do you think our hobbies are very similar?"

The Jiujianxian's face darkened when he heard this, and he cursed: "It's so similar! A Taoist's hobbies are elegant things. What do you call your hobbies? They are so vulgar and morally corrupt!"

Luo Feng looked surprised and said in astonishment: "What did the Taoist Master say? Only immortals are allowed to drink alcohol, and mortals are not allowed to pick up girls? How come my hobby is not an elegant thing? Confucius said: 'Food and sex are also the nature of food', poem It says: 'A fair lady, a gentleman loves to be a quarrel'. Don't all the literati and elegant guests of this dynasty also like to go to the brothels of Jiaofang? There is Liu Sanbian who writes lyrics according to the order, and there is Shanmo Weiyun, Bachelor of Qin, you are an old man and drank it. After spending most of your life drinking, how many elegant poems have you composed?"

The Jiujianxian was so angry that his beard was trembling, and he reprimanded patiently: "It doesn't harm others if you drink alcohol, but you are lustful and want bad people to be innocent. You play with emotions, hurt countless innocent women, and leave behind countless evil fates!"

"Taoist Priest, you are judging a gentleman's belly with a villain's heart!"

Luo Feng said with an aggrieved look: "The right way is 'a gentleman is lustful and marries in the right way'. Mr. Luo has always been a person who cares about flowers and fragrance. How could he be irresponsible and behave like an animal? Mr. Luo is lustful, It starts from the heart and ends with etiquette, and everyone pays sincerity! You must also set rules for yourself: firstly, do not provoke married women, secondly, do not use money and power to force others to submit, and thirdly, marry them home after you hook up. I love you so much, treat everyone equally, and get the rain and dew equally. It is not against the law to take concubines in this dynasty. My Luo family is as rich as the country. How can I not afford to raise tens of thousands of concubines?"

Jiu Jianxian felt his head hurt when he heard that. He didn't want to talk to him about these three extremely vulgar topics, but he was worried that letting him harm the women of the world would be a sin. He could only frown and asked: "When the old Taoist sees that good wine, can he rely on it?" If you want to come and drink at the door of a restaurant, how can you get her if you like a beauty? It’s not just coercion and inducement!"

"The Taoist priest is a monk and is not close to women. I don't understand this!"

Luo Feng stepped forward and whispered: "This dynasty, there is a matchmaker Wang Po on Zishi Street in Yanggu County who is good at matchmaking. The Wang Po doesn't know a lot of Chinese characters, but she has come up with a unique trick to attract women, which is called ' To implement the strategy of "getting exposed to light", five things must be done, and these five things are the "Pan Donkey, Deng Xiaoxian"."

Luo Feng put on a show-off pose, pointed at his handsome face and said: "'Pan' means he looks like Pan An, 'donkey' means you know what, and 'Deng' means rich man Deng Tong," "Small" means being gentle and knowing how to coax people, "leisure" means not having to work hard for life and having a lot of time. Luo is not talented and has everything. The only thing he lacked originally was time. Now his dreams are broken and the rest of his life is wasted. Time is It's great."

As a single fairy dog, Jiujianxian really didn't understand much about this matter between men and women, but after listening to what Luo Feng said, his heart grew colder and colder, and he vaguely felt that what he said was true.

This guy really has a lot of money to attract bees and butterflies. If he really spends time, energy and money to do it, and starts taking concubines one by one, he can really marry him and create a kingdom of daughters!

"Shopkeeper Luo, how can you, a man, satisfy tens of thousands of women? There will always be someone guarding the empty boudoir."

The Jiujianxian urged: "I don't want you to die with only one wife, but marrying three wives and four concubines is enough, right?"

"Okay, let's give the Taoist priest a bit of a thin face and only marry three wives and four concubines, but this requires careful selection."

Luo Feng also listened to the advice, rubbed his hands and said: "Let me think about it, what kind of target are we looking for? The eldest lady of a martial arts family? A little fairy with an unworldly temperament but a simple and lovely temperament? An ill-fated little vixen ? A quirky little young girl? A pretty disciple of the female fairy sect? With my methods, Luo Daguanren, those fledgling young people are more gentle and considerate than me, and they understand my daughter's thoughts better than I do. They will not be tired to death!"

Although it is said that marriage is destined by fate, the matter between man and woman is not the mating of cats and dogs. Some people also say that a good woman cannot stand up to a man. What's more, Luo Feng is a serious, rich and handsome man. He wants money, good looks, and good martial arts. If he really wants it, He might be able to succeed if he loses his temper and resorts to the tactic of exposing himself to the enemy.

Luo Feng's words were like thunder from the sky in the ears of Jiujianxian. Although he didn't know why he was so shocked, he secretly felt that if Luo Daguan succeeded, a green light would dazzle the nine heavens. Shining, the foundation of heaven and earth is not stable, and he has also been inexplicably involved in huge karma. If he doesn't stop this, his body and soul will be easy to die!

"This must never be done!"

The Jiujianxian suddenly stood up and drank loudly.

Luo Feng blinked and said in confusion and annoyance: "Taoist priest, you are too lenient in your control, are you still being reasonable? My private affairs of marrying wives and concubines are also under the control of immortals? After drinking a thousand bottles of my wine, wipe it clean." It was you who refused to accept me into Shu Mountain to slay demons. It was you who suggested that I choose a hobby. It was you who didn’t allow me to sleep with beauties all over the world to comfort me for the rest of my life. I took so many steps back and ended up marrying three wives and four concubines. You have to take care of it, are you free, or do you have a grudge against me in the past life? If the Taoist priest can tell the truth, Mr. Luo will listen to you. If he can't tell the truth, we will go to the street to invite people to comment. So that the people of Shu know that immortals can become drunk and crazy when they drink too much, and they are very arrogant."

Being squeezed out by Luo Feng, Jiujianxian felt that he had been wronged and his momentum was slightly weakened. He could not accurately predict the future based on his Taoism. He did not understand why Luo Feng's marriage and concubinage could arouse him to have an ominous premonition.

The immortal does not slay demons, but attends the marriage affairs of rich families. Those who know that he is a wine and swordsman, but those who do not know think that it is Yue Lao who got drunk and slipped and fell into the heaven!

Rubbing his temples, Jiu Jianxian said helplessly: "What was your dream before?"

"Worship into Shushan..."

"Next!"

"Sleep with all the beauties in the world..."

"The one in the middle!"

"Teach me three moves and two moves..."

"Tell me, what do you want to learn?"