Maybe a Fake Gintama

One day, a man with a dirty plaster on his face and a man with bandaged glasses kicked open the door of Jiang Cheng's room at the same time.

boom! !

After the door was kicked down, Gintoki and Shinpachi rushed in angrily.

"You should take care of that violent little girl!" Gintoki, who was wearing a bandage on his head, a plaster on his left leg and wearing a hospital gown, shouted, "Duty! Duty! You, the guardian of the earth, should occasionally fulfill your duty." Do your duty! Look, this and this are all done by that violent little girl!"

"Yes! Jiang Cheng-san!" Shinpachi, whose right eye's spectacle lens was full of cracks, shouted angrily, "Even if it is for Kagura-chan's good, we must take some necessary measures! If this continues, Maybe she will become a very bad person in the future! By the way, why did I only describe the glasses?"

"Anyway, let's settle the medical bills first and let's talk about the mental damages and so on." Gintoki continued, minding his own business, but as soon as he finished speaking, he was tugged at the corner of his clothes by Shinpashi who was standing aside.

"What's wrong?" Gintoki looked disapproving, and then showed a serious expression: "Isn't it normal to ask for mental damage compensation for this kind of thing? Even an acquaintance can't pamper her too much! Faced with this kind of thing Victims like us must not tolerate these evil deeds! Do you understand?! Old bastard! We must not let this go without tens of millions this time!"

"No, I didn't mean that, and...no matter how many tens of millions or something..."

"Let's just get it together and ask for 100 million." Gintoki held his chin and continued to talk to himself.

"No, before discussing that kind of thing..." As he spoke, Xinbaji looked expressionlessly in a certain direction of the living room, "There seems to be a victim here. Although I don't know why, there is no doubt that it is. A victim.”

"Huh?" Gintoki was surprised, then looked in the direction Shinpachi was looking, "What are you talking about..."

After seeing Jiang Cheng's situation clearly, Gintoki instantly stopped talking and his expression froze.

At this time, Jiang Cheng's whole head was stuffed into the computer monitor. It looked like he had been beaten severely. The broken monitor made sparks and crackling sounds from time to time.

If you look closely, Jiang Cheng's body will twitch from time to time. As for whether he is still conscious...it's hard to say.

"Is it...Gintoki?" Jiang Cheng's extremely weak voice sounded, "What...please help me pull out my head, my body...has multiple fractures..."

"gone,

Laoba. "Gintoki turned around and left without the slightest hesitation, "Listen, we didn't see anything when we came in. We didn't see anything like the murder scene. do you understand? "

"Understood." Xin Bajia turned around silently and followed.

"Wait a moment--!!"

…

In front of a low table in the living room, three victims whose eyes were covered by black screens and whose voices were specially processed were recounting various experiences of persecution.

First the first victim, he said this...

"Huh? Me? Am I the first one?"

Our first victim doesn't seem ready yet. Well...do I need to give you a little more time to prepare?

"No, no need. It's ready."

So, let's get started, first... Huh? Don't cry yet. Sorry, dear readers, the first victim is a little emotional. Let’s give him a little more time.

…

Is it ok?

"Yeah, okay. Sorry, I was a little excited just now."

Can you briefly describe the situation? Why? Why are you crying again? Sir, sir? Be calm for sure.

"I'm sorry, I just can't help myself when I think about the situation at that time."

Anyway, please control it a little bit, and then we'll start over. First of all, please describe the situation at that time and how you were persecuted.

“Wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo of ofooo..." Victim No. 1 lay on the table and howled loudly. He sobbed and said, "That... that's obviously me... it seems like it's me... no, it's obviously the pudding that I bought! Wuwuwu——”

pudding? In other words, has your pudding been illegally appropriated? Could you please explain it in detail?

"It's not that simple!" Victim No. 1 shouted excitedly, slamming the table with both fists at the same time. "I'm just afraid of being discovered... No, I just want to eat secretly... No, that's not the case either."

I mean, I tried to steal some pudding, but ended up being repaired, right?

"No!! I told you no!" Victim No. 1 hammered the table a few times again, "It's just that I worked very hard during the day! And then I wanted to eat a little bit of her... no, just my pudding at night! "

OK, we understand, please continue.

"But, but..." Victim No. 1 sobbed again, "Just when I walked carefully to the refrigerator and just opened the refrigerator door..."

I see, that means you were caught stealing pudding and then had to be repaired, right?

"No—! By the way, do you still have any conscience? Seeing me like this, are you still caring about such an irrelevant question as to who is that pudding?!"

Sir, don't get excited, please continue.

"And then..." Victim No. 1 choked up again, covered her face and continued in unbearable grief: "I really didn't steal the pudding! Please believe me! I explained it to her like this, but... but... Woo woo woo…”

So what, did it turn out that it had already been eaten? pudding……

"I already said that's not the point anymore! What's wrong with you? Why do you have to compete over such inconsequential things!"

boom! !

Victim No. 1, whose head was held down by the other two victims with two hands and hit hard on the table, let out a scream of "Wow", and then became completely silent.

"Sorry." Victim No. 2 raised his mosaic glasses and said very politely to the camera: "Please forget about Victim No. 1."

Um...ok.

"Then let me do it this time." Victim No. 2 looked directly at the camera, but then suddenly thought of something, "Can I really say it? Will I not be recognized and retaliated? To be honest, I am a little worried."

Please rest assured that the mosaic has been added and the sound has been processed so that it will never be recognized by acquaintances.

"Really?" Victim No. 2 held his chin with his glasses, obviously still not believing it, "But I still feel a little uneasy."

Don't worry, no one will recognize you now. I believe the readers in front of the screen will never recognize it. They will only be regarded as insignificant and unfamiliar glasses... human beings.

"If that's the case..." Victim No. 2 put down the burden in his heart. He nodded and said, "Hey, I understand. I will tell you all about my victimization process."

So, first introduce yourself, and let readers have a general understanding of the relationship between you and the perpetrator in a way that you feel is obscure.

"To be specific...they are colleagues."

Hey - he turned out to be a colleague. It is also normal in this society for colleagues to fight for superiority. Please continue.

"It's not the kind of overt and covert fight for the upper hand." Victim No. 2 touched the back of his head and continued, "But... unlike Yin... no, unlike Victim No. 1, I didn't do anything to provoke her at all. ! I feel really innocent!”

oh? Can you please elaborate? We here, including the readers in front of the screen, will support you, so please don’t have any psychological baggage.

"Actually yesterday..." Victim No. 2 pushed up the glasses on the bridge of his nose and slowly told his story...

"Last night, my sister was working the night shift..."

Could it be that your family members were also persecuted?

"No, that's not the case. I am often persecuted by my family. But it doesn't matter anymore. What I'm talking about now is not that kind of insignificant thing."

Got it, let’s not pay attention to the domestic violence in your home and other unimportant things for the time being, you continue.

"Okay, let's continue. What did I just say?"

Your sister works the night shift…

"That's right, my sister was on the night shift last night, and I was the only one in the entire dojo. Then in the early morning, I went out because of some things..."

Early morning? Why go out alone in the early morning? Does it have anything to do with the adult magazines in your arms?

Victim No. 2, with glasses, flushed, clenched his fists and shouted excitedly at the camera: "Do you really want to be interviewed? Does this kind of thing matter? It doesn't matter at all! Hey! Stop it a little bit!" You unscrupulous media!"

Don't get excited, don't get excited, we won't talk about adult magazines anymore, please continue.

"Ahem," Suspicious Spectacle No. 2 cleared his throat, and at the same time calmly put a corner of the magazine in his arms, and pretended to complain: "You mass media, always pay attention to something Where it doesn’t matter at all.”

We already know we were wrong, so please continue.

"Then... I went to buy it secretly alone... ah, no, I bought adult magazines... ah, no, I was walking alone..."

As he said this, Victim No. 2 suddenly fell on the table and started sobbing.

So what, was it that colleague of yours who met you at that time?

"...I'm sorry, I seem to be a little too excited." Victim No. 2 took out a few pieces of paper from the paper box on the table and wiped his tears, and continued, "At that time, I happened to walk downstairs of the company, Then...first I heard the screams of Silver...Victim No. 1, and then saw..."

As he said this, the expression of victim No. 2 showed a bit of horror.

Could it be... is that colleague of yours? ! Did your colleague show up at this time? What exactly did she do to you? Dear readers, we will reveal it in the next chapter.