MMORPG: Rise of the Peerless Pumpkinmancer
354 I AM Human!
Never had the Mermaid city been so peaceful.
Yet everything was about to change, an incredible evil about to sweep the City. It all started when a strange commotion happened.
"SHARK!!!" The sentry's cry of disbelief echoed so loudly.
"What, all the way over here?! That's impossible!" The bystanders cried out.
The shock was so big that countless transformations suddenly reverted. What previously looked like a human underwater settlement revealed itself for its true nature.
Mermaids, visiting frogs, scaled alligator-like creatures, and more. Many races living in the lake had recently come under the mermaids' banner, after all.
"Everyone, get ready to fight! It seems they didn't learn their lessons! This time we'll massacre them all and—"
"Wait! It's not a shark wave…. there's only one shark?! Gasp! Three individuals are on its back!"
Many couldn't help but choke. People?! Was there even someone able to tame sharks in this lake? The latters were highly infamous for their horrendous characters, so how?!
Their curiosity was already getting the better of them.
By the time Jack finally arrived riding his dashing shark mount, a crowd was assembled, all dying of curiosity. Who the hell was this guy?!
Jack had simply gotten a shark because it looked cool. Little did he know that historically they had been a force to reckon with. Hell, there was a reason their territory was off-limit!
He had been worried they'd be suspicious….but their shining eyes only showed a fearful curiosity. But they were obviously about to ask questions, and that would be bad.
"Tsk-Tsk. You all failed." Jack shook his head, "disappointed".
"W-what?!" Many lost their train of thought.
Good. Jack was utterly determined to take control of the flow of the conversation forcefully. Could he pull the wool over an entire group of enemies? He'd bloody try!
Right now, he needed to show authority. He wanted to bombard them with such assurance that they'd just accept his story at face value.
He'd base all his show on one hypothesis: they were training to look human….naturally they'd need a teacher, right? He'd play that role!
"All I did was show up, and you all lost your transformations? Ridiculous! What do you have to say for yourselves?!" He powerfully berated them.
One had to know that hundreds of them…while he was a total stranger who couldn't look more human. It would be way too easy to reveal him for who he was.
Thus he kept a close eye on the people in the crowd.
Shame, confusion, surprise, excitement, anger— RED FLAG!
Anyone showing anger toward him at this stage would undoubtedly try to contest the fake image he was trying to present. He had to nip them in the bud.
"You, the frowning bastard! I can see your bloody tail. How useless can you be!" He hurriedly kept going, noticing most of the belligerent ones, pointed at them with reproach.
"Green skin!"
"Webbed hands!"
"Close your goddamn mouth!"
"You're literally emitting water!"
He kept going with the flaws, shutting a good number of the spectators. They wanted to talk back, ask him who the hell he was, but recoiled under the crowd's gazes.
But this was only a temporary measure. It was only a matter of time before someone called him an impostor. As for how to deal with that…. he'd simply call himself out!
"Now, I have a challenge for you all. Try your best to find a flaw in my disguise, any at all! I'll give a reward to the first one that succeeds, something great." Jack winked at them.
Something great?! How exciting coming from a guy that was casually riding a shark! Even now, they still had no clue who he was, but all they had in mind was the rewards.
Thus they all spoke one after the others, creating a cacophony of answers.
"Raise your hands, one after the others. That's how humans would do it. Tch— Don't you guys know the adage: know your enemy?" He once again criticized them.
He wanted them to believe that he was a mysterious expert on human culture. Given the current war with humans, this would be useful to send spies into enemy territory!
To him, it was only a cover, but to them it was an opportunity to learn a craft. Who knows, maybe they'd be able to get a job out of this, right?
Some were still suspicious, but plenty were ready to jump on the opportunity, no question asked. It didn't take long for a sea of hands to be raised.
"Your eyes are too dark! Human eyes aren't like that!"
"Hehe, that's all voluntary. Eye color can change based on magic mastery: true for all races. It's easier to collect information if people think you're a mage."
"Ah! I see! What about the shark! There's no way a human could tame one!" They all nodded. Oh, this was pure gold!
"Now that one is a bit tricky. But humans are deeply religious and worship many bullshit gods. Just blame it on a god's gift, and 99% of them will accept it, even if it's nonsense."
"What about the 1%?!"
"Every living thing is imperfect. Going for 100% on every point will make you seem even more suspicious. Do you understand?"
"Kinda…?"
They were still processing the previous statement, not realizing that they had unconsciously accepted the human as a bona fide ally when he was actually a complete stranger.
"Oh, I know! Your attitude is obviously a dead giveaway! As if a human would ever stand in here and lecture us!" A bright student chuckled, the irony passing above her head.
"Tch— Nitpicking. I guess you're the worst kind of right. How about this? I'll answer three of your questions...but only if I deem them worthy. Only one chance per question too…."
"Thank you!!" The random girl was now bowing so exaggeratedly.
Jack observed her. She was hiding her bestial attributes, but she was probably some mixed-blood between a mermaid and something else.
Her short brown hair couldn't appear more basic, yet there was an air around her, mermaid-like, but without the narcissism.
After thinking for a few moments, she finally opened her mouth.
"What are your—"
"Orders from the palace!" A mighty shout mercilessly drowned her voice, a crown-wearing frog interrupting her. "The unknown visitor is to report to the palace immediately!"
The crowd couldn't help but feel both sad and excited. As expected of such a character, he was already getting summoned by her majesty!
But then they suddenly realized that they hadn't even asked him who he was or where he was coming from. Couldn't he at least answer this beforehand?!
"Her Majesty? I see. Give me a second. I'm giving a lecture."
"?!?"
Had he just told the imperial messenger to…wait?! This guy had balls of steel, adamantium even! The awe they had felt earlier was suddenly rekindled.
"Y-you, you, you!!" The messenger couldn't believe his ears, stuttering and stunned.
"Just kidding, haha!" Jack began to laugh heartily, everyone releasing the breath they had unconsciously been holding.
"Humor is something humans are very keen on. You have to learn it if you don't want to stand out. It's imperative that…."
What the heck?! Was he still lecturing?! Had he been joking or not?! There was one thing they were sure of, however. They needed to study under him!
After a few more minutes, Jack left satisfied. How would his new students react if they knew they had helped him create a near-perfect alibi?
Now, would his subterfuge fool a queen? So many things could go wrong, yet he still had to, for her sake…
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