Overturned Tower

The memory ends abruptly at this point.

Those memory fragments that belonged to Blue Bird floating in front of him... seemed so close at the moment.

What he just saw was the lowest memory in the mask of "Blue Songbird".

Russell still remembered that Fila should be Blue Bird's real name.

And Shirley seems to be Morgan's name before he got his code name...

"...I seem to understand."

He murmured in a low voice: "What on earth am I afraid of..."

The voices of Russell and the "Godfather" overlapped: "What are you afraid of..."

His deepest fear...was loneliness.

And these "masks" also have it.

The fear of being abandoned by the whole world, the loneliness that no one can help oneself - that is the despair that only permeates the whole body when a person is absolutely unable to solve the problem at hand.

——His idea was wrong from the very beginning.

He can turn these people into his "masks" not because he has inherited the other person's legacy, nor because they have any great talents.

He inherited too much will.

There are countless people who have imitated and learned from him...

Before he met Morgan, he had never "sworn an oath" at all, but he still triggered his psychic powers and saw the traces that Morgan had carved in the non-existent history.

Therefore, if it is based on oaths and bonds, there seems to be something missing...

Now Russell finally knows.

The one thing that really brings them together is that hopeless loneliness.

That feeling of despair that feels like the earth is falling apart when you are alone and facing a career that you absolutely cannot complete.

It is the fear that is similar to Russell's origin that resonates with his psychic abilities.

——There is no love without reason in this world, and there is no hatred without reason.

Bluebird never left Morgan until his death, and it was not without reason that he sacrificed himself in order to gain the other's safe love.

His fear of the "Birdcage" and his hatred of the company were etched deep in his memory at an early age.

He may have forgotten this incident, leaving only residual impressions.

But that kind of warmth and touch when someone breaks the cage in times of despair is like being close to a warm fireplace on a winter night, making Russell's body uncontrollably warm to the point of trembling.

Morgan's words seemed to echo in Russell's mind:

"Back then, I actually wanted to be a [hero]."

"At first, I wanted to have 'admirers.' After that... I wanted to be his hero. Be his hero."

"A hero is wind and light. Any force that is timely enough to change everything."

"Whenever he needed me, I was there...

"—I think that's what a 'hero' is."

I see.

I see.

Russell murmured in a low voice: "In the beginning... it was right here."

Inside and outside a closed birdcage.

In the heavy snow covering the sky and the earth.

The "hero" who breaks the cage and the caged bird waiting for the hero's rescue...the fate of the two lonely people is intertwined with each other.

He finally knew why the "Caged Bird"'s psychic powers had never improved.

Because he simply didn't understand what "caged bird" meant to Bluebird.

That's not a prison. In other words, it's not about imprisonment.

— but about release.

Bluebird is not a person hiding in a cage and living an ignoble existence, nor is he a devil hoping to imprison others... The meaning of the prison is to break the cage.

It's about waiting for a hero who can arrive in time and change everything.

"……sorry."

Russell said softly: "I'm late."

His voice, which overlapped with "Godfather", was only one when he said this sentence.

It was Russell's own voice.

"That's not your fault."

A low and hoarse voice sounded from behind Russell.

When Russell turned around, the broken void around him suddenly disappeared without a trace.

Together with the previous temple, it also disappeared.

There is only a huge mirror in front of you.

And Russell sat in the chair, just like he had during the previous conversation with the director of Tokifat.

From his ankles, his palms, and his chest, a chain with the color of the starry sky spread out from each, and submerged into the mirror - symmetrically locked on the limbs of the person in the mirror.

——And the person sitting in the mirror is none other than Lan Geyu.

Like a true godfather, he crossed his legs and leaned back, with his hands interlaced in front of him. Completely different from the upright seated Russell action.

The Blue Songbird in the mirror had a complicated expression: "Hoping that a hero will never be late is a luxury wish.

"After all, the 'heroes' don't owe them anything."

"them?"

"I don't think I need to be saved by a hero."

Blue Bird said gently: "There is only one person who can save me. And at that time, she also fell into another kind of suffering.

"Perhaps what I resent...is that there was no hero to save her.

“In other words, it’s myself that I resent.

"Why am I so weak? Why am I so incompetent?

"Why can't I save the hero who always saves me at the most opportune moment?

"In other words... what I resent is precisely this world that requires heroes."

Russell looked at him and remained silent.

And Blue Bird suddenly laughed: "It seems you have realized it.

"——Yes, I am your devil."

"…So, what is the container of God?"

"I am the vessel of God. The vessel that seals God and the vessel made by God are both vessels of God."

Blue Songbird looked at Russell and said meaningfully: "And you... are the god in that container."

"…What exactly do you mean?"

"I think my point has been made very clear. You are just lying to yourself."

Bluebird sighed and reached out to grab the chain on his chest.

At that moment, Russell felt as if his heart was being grabbed by someone.

"What exactly is psionic energy? You should know it by now.

"If psychic powers are just psychic parasites attracted by memories and emotions...then how can the memories from other worlds we bring give birth to brand new psychic powers and demons that do not exist in this world?

"If this spiritual power does not exist in this world, how come there is an extra spiritual power that 'should not exist' because of the extra memory that has no origin? What is special is just this memory, or you itself?

"Why don't you think about it carefully, what are you copying and imitating in another world?"

"I……"

Russell murmured unconsciously, looking down at his hands.

What did I copy?

What did I imitate?

Under Russell's gaze, his arm gradually began to melt.

But what was revealed inside was not the bones and muscles...but the black mist.

It is the black gaseous material that is constantly flowing like a nebula.

no.

Can't remember. Unable to recall. Have no idea.

who I am?

What am I?

"I am……"

"—Wake up, Russell."

Suddenly, he heard Miss Huachu's voice.

Just like when I was in class, I was suddenly awakened by the teacher's chalk while I was sleeping and awake——

When he suddenly opened his eyes again, he found that he was back at Hua Chu's desk, still holding the glass of water he had never drank before.

The last part of the memory began to fade away quickly... It was like trying to reach out to hold the smoke, but only saw gray-white smoke leaking from the fingers.

Miss Huachu was still sitting opposite him.

I don't know if she walked back from behind him...or if she never left?

...When did you start falling into a hallucination?

"It seems like your psychological problem won't be solved for a while."

Huazhu sighed softly.

She put her slightly trembling hands under the table.

From an angle that Russell couldn't see, the backs of her hands seemed to have been burned by something, leaving light black lines like blood vessels.

She didn't say when she would start the second treatment, she just showed a sweet and reassuring smile: "But I think, at least regarding the identity of 'godfather'... you should have sorted it out, right?"

"Yes. I finally know why the spiritual power of 'Caged Bird' cannot be upgraded."

Russell nodded and sighed: "It turns out that I didn't understand Bluebird at all before..."

He easily sensed the flower touch and was unwilling to treat himself again.

Although she doesn't know why...she has done enough for herself.

So Russell shook his ears, nodded seriously and said, "Anyway, thank you very much.

"This should effectively reduce the risk of me losing control."

"You won't lose control."

Hua Touch replied very firmly: "You must believe in yourself. If you don't believe in yourself, then believe in me who said this."

"...How should I put it? This is a bit subtle."

Russell couldn't help coughing: "It's better to say less."

Huachu was a little confused: "Isn't this what you said in an interview? Is there some gossip that I don't know about that is being circulated among young people?"

No, no, no, I was indeed making a joke at the time, but if you don’t know that the joke still says that, it always feels like you are setting a flag...

"Anyway, thank you very much——"

"Oh, by the way," Huazhu interrupted Russell, "Remember to tell Xisheng and ask him to come back to me next week. I need to take a little rest this week..."

"Well...but before that, I happen to have something serious to ask you."

Russell suddenly thought that he still had "business" to come here.

update completed!

When I woke up today, I didn't know why I felt weak and had no appetite. I also felt that my stomach was bloated...

Very tired and without energy, but not sleepy. I tried to sleep, but I couldn't sleep either. My coding efficiency was very slow. I got up at ten o'clock and only wrote less than six hundred words at three o'clock...

I don’t know why, but I suddenly felt better after 3:30 in the afternoon, and then I wrote from 3:30 to 6:00, totaling 5,000 words...

But I still feel my stomach is so bloated and I don’t want to eat right away today (touch my stomach)