Pure Love X Insult Complex

「…Michi-kun, just take a break for a moment…」

Kudou papa tells his daughter while swaying.

「…Papa just has an important talk with this boy」

Then…he turned to me.「」

「…Then…err, what’s your name again…?!」

Kudou Papa once again shows a nihilist dandy face then spoke to me…

「I’m asking you what’s your name…Ah,han?」

Un…So he’s speaking with that kind of feel.

He even used 「Ah,ahn?」something English-like

「…Yoshida」

When I reintroduced myself…

Kudou Papa’s face looks like he’s been struck by a lightning…

「Y-Yoshida…you say?!!!」

Then he removed his sunglasses.

He glares at me strongly…!

There’s beads of sweat coming out of his forehead…

「…You, N-No way…you’re really…Yoshida-…!!」

He’s looking at me with a serious face.

「…Yes, that’s right」

Kudou papa then puts his hand on his breast pocket…

「…Maybe you have a grandfather that I was indebt in…sorry but could you take a look at this guy?」

Saying that…he took out something wrapped in purple cloth.

「…I feel sorry taking up your time」

Then…Kudou papa approaches me.

Then he presents the cloth wrapper in his hand to me…!

Kudou papa takes another step ahead.

…Fasa!!!

Suddenly, Kudou papa’s hand opens up and flies towards my face…!

…But

I ignore the wrapper hurled in my face…!

I pull my 『Beat up stick』…then take a step forward!!!

Then, without hesitation…

I beat up Kudou papa’s head with all my might!!!!

…Gako!!!

Hitting right in the center…the impact responded!!!!

「…Ouuuuuuuucccchhh!!!」

When I take away the wrapper that flew to my face…!

Kudou papa’s rolling on the ground holding his head…!

「Amazing…he easily broke father’s secret technique『Never say Never again』」

Kudou-chan mutters…

「…Do you know it Michi?」

Misuzu asks Kudou-chan…

No, of course she knows.

This person is Kudou-chan’s father…and they’re the only two practicing Kudou style ancient martial arts in the world.

「Yes…Misuzu-sama. The secret technique 『Never say Never again 』…is speaking skillfully as you approach the enemy…pretending to show…something wrapped in cloth, then throwing that to the opponent’s face…it’s a secret technique of Kudou style that deprives the opponent’s sight like an octopus…!!」

…Secret technique what?

「An inexperienced one like me cannot comprehend such a phantom skill. I don’t have a diverse acting skill like my father…!」

True…Kudou-chan’s better off smiling than acting.

Or rather…Kudou papa’s acting is doubtful as well.

Somehow, he’s having an abnormally sweltering face…

「…You see, I often find cases where they notice my intention halfway…actually」

Kudou papa rises while rubbing his head.

「But you see…at those times, they concentrate on avoiding the wrapper that flew to their face so they instinctively back off. Then…I use that chance…well, it’s that kind of strategy…!」

Kudou papa approaches me again.

「And yet…Why are you taking a step forward?」

…I

「If I don’t step forward, I won’t be able to hit you」

Yeah…I thought that the chance won’t arrive.

「Or rather…Why are you beating people up calmly. Take a look at what you have…it’s a blunt weapon. A blunt weapon. It’s a surprisingly blunt weapon! It’s a blunt weapon that hits bluntly! Look, Ojii-san has his head is swelling…it was okay that it was just a swell but if you do it badly…I would die from that. I’ll die, seriously die. Un, he’ll die…can’t you imagine that? This isn’t a negligence resulting to death…it’s a legitimate murder…does your heart not feel pain…Ahn?!」

…Err

…What should I say?

「…With that said, I would like you to see this for a moment」

Kudou papa once again took out a wrapping cloth from his chest pocket.

…When he took it out

I hit him with all my might…

…Bago!!!!!

Kudou papa was blown away

「…Amazing! He completely brushed aside father’s 『Never say Never again’s』secondary attack…!」

No…Kudou-chan.

That’s amazing?

Rather…your father’s amazing for taking out another wrapper smoothly.

「…Nnnnnnnnn!…Ojii-san’s head feels something right now…!」

But still…Kudou papa stands up…

「…He hit him twice…even though I have never hit my father…!」

No…even if you tell me that.

「…Aaaah…Yoshida-kun was it…Just what are you?」

Kudou papa asks me.

「Normally…after I speak that much, your heart would feel that I won’t hit him with all my might for the next time…are you a demon? Or are you a human without imagination…? Do you not understand the meaning of our actions…Aaah? If you hit me that much…I’ll die you know! I’ll die! Do you intend to kill me?…Aaan?!!!!」

…Err

「Uhm…I heard that Kudou-san will be fine even if I hit him with all my power」

I answered honestly…

「Whaaaaat…Who said that?!」

…Hmm

「…Misuzu」

Or rather…this person.

He was hit by Kudou-chan’s hammer four times…

Then I hit him with my 『beat up stick』two times…

Isn’t he fine?…

Amazing…

「…Misuzu Ojou-sama?!」

Kudou papa looks at Misuzu inside the car.

「Yes…I definitely said that. Kudou-san is a very tough person so confront him with all your strength, I said」

Misuzu opens the window then tells Kudou papa…

「…Ahahahahaahah…yesyesyes…I get it, I see.」 Misuzu-ojousama has said that so it can’t be helped…like hell, did you think I will say that you bastard!!!!」

Kudou papa glares at me with strong eyes…!

「Hey…bastard…aaan…who are you again?」

「…Yoshida」

Oh right, Yoshidaaaaaa!! Let me tell you something!!!」

What…?

「You were told by Misuzu-ojousama to『Even if you hit uncle Kudou with all your might, he’s cool so he’ll be fine!』… she did say that…well, even if she say that…that’s another case but…however, just because she told you, you shouldn’t hit me in the head. Don’t you think you’ll understand if you think for it even for a moment?!!! Or could it be that you will kill yourself if Misuzu-Ojousan tells you to die?! Aaah…!!!」

…Err

「Uhm. I will kill myself if Misuzu tells me to die though…」

What is this person saying?

「…Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!!!」

Kudou papa shouts.

「…Danna-sama!」

Misuzu’s face turned red…

「M-Me too…!」

Eh…Kudou-chan?

「If Misuzu-sama tells me to『die』…I will commit suicide anytime anywhere…!!!!」

What are you declaring?

Thenshe looks at me with passionate eyes.

「…We’re allies」

…Ha?

「Yoshida-sama…you are my ally from the bottom of my heart…!」

…Errr

…Uhm

I will kill myself if Misuzu tells me but…

I will die for Megu, Katsuko-nee, or Nagisa too…

Even for Mana…

Minaho-neesan’s orders are absolute so I’ll myself if she tells me…

Margo-san…she’s thinking about something if she’ll tell me that so I have no choice but to die.

If it’s Nei-san…yeah, I will. I’ll gladly kill myself.

If it was Yukino…I won’t.

Or rather…Yukino have told me to 『die』multiple times…

But still, I haven’t killed myself.

「Michi…are you really going to do everything Misuzu says?」1

Misuzu asks from inside the car.

「…Yes, Misuzu-sama!!!

Kudou-chan shouts at Misuzu.

Somehow, it feels like a puppy waving her tail.

「Then…I’ll order you, Michi…!」

「Yes…please order me」

「Offer your virginity to Danna-sama…and swear to never embrace a man other than Danna-sama for the rest of your life…!」

「…Other men?」

Misuzu smiles…

「If it’s a woman…Misuzu will be taking care of you. Forever!!!」

「…Misuzu-samaaaa!!!」

「…Imagine it. Michi guarding me and my baby with Danna-sama…

「…Misuzu-sama’s child!」

「That’s right…But, you don’t necessarily need to be a guard…I want you to be a nanny」

「…Nanny」

Kudou-chan looks at her own flat chest…

「…But, Misuzu-sama. I don’t have enough breasts to satisfy Misuzu-sama’s child

「That’s okay…if Danna-sama massages and sucks it from now on…It’ll grow soon enough」

「However…I don’t have the milk to nurse the child」

「Then…Danna-sama will get Michi pregnant!」

…eh?

「Misuzu’s child and Michi’s child will grow up like siblings from Michi’s breasts…don’t you think it’s wonderful?」

「…It’s wonderfuuul!2」

Kudou-chan’s face looks excited.

Kudou-chan… came back from the world of delusion…!

Kudou-chan, you can still make it!!!

「I! I will offer my body to Yoshida-sama! No, please let me offer my body!!!」

…Too late!

「…I-I won’t let this! I will never let this happen! Michi-kun…Papa will never let this happen…Kii!!!」

What’s with the 「Kii!!」on the end?

「Michi-kun…didn’t you say when you were a child…『I will be Papa’s bride when I grow up』… Where did your decision when you were three years old go?! You should carry out your original intention!!!」

「…I didn’t say anything like that」

「You did…when Michi-kun was three, inside the bath with Papa…!」

「…I didn’t. I have not taken a bath with father」

「…We did! until you were four…!」

「…We didn’t」

「WE DID…Papa has already seen Michi-kun’s 『This kind of look』and 『That kind of look』…I’ve seen everything…because I’m your papa…!」

Kudou-chan threw a missile punch to Kudou papa’s head…!!!

「…Gueeeeeeeee!!!」

Kudou papa was blown away and fell down.

「…Forget it. Please forget it. For example, a daughter taking a bath with the father until she aged ten, that is not me and will never be me! It’s a dream! A delusion! That girl didn’t exist since the start! It’s all father’s delusion!…Please believe me, Misuzu-sama!」

Misuzu smiles.

「Michi…let’s take a bath together next time」

「…Misuzu-sama!」

「Danna-sama will be joining up too but you don’t mind do you?」

「Yes…Yoshida-sama is a friend!」

…Err

…What should I do?

「…I won’t allow this, I won’t allow this! I won’t allow this! As long as Papa has his eyes black, I won’t…Buhee!!」

Kudou-chan’s victory hammer hits him again…!

「Then…I will make father’s black eyes turn to white with my hands!!!」

Kudou-chan waves the steel ball.

「…Michi-kun. Can you make it at least blue or gray…? Papa uses colored contact lenses for disguise though…」

Kudou papa takes a mysterious pose while saying that…

The father and daughter confronts each other again…

…Then

「…You two should stop already!!!」

A woman’s voice stopped the,

Looking at it…a tall woman in white suit appears from the rehearsal building of Konpeki school.

「…M-Mama-uesama!」

Kudou-chan’s stops spinning the chain.

「Didn’t I always tell you to call me 『Mother』in public? What’s with『Mama-uesama』…really, Michi’s always copying all the strange places of her father」

That person is Kudou-chan’s mother?

「I was told that there’s 『a funny theatrical perfomance on the road』so I just thought it were you people so I came here and I was right!」

Kudou mama looks angry…

When she looked around…

The first class neighborhood that doesn’t look like busy…

Has around 30 people gathering because of curiosity before we noticed.

Looking up at the building…

Oh, there are girls on Yukata looking down here…

…awawawawa

「…E-Etsuko…Why are you here?」

Kudou papa is completely surprised by the sudden appearance of his wife…

「Isn’t that obvious…it’s to guard Ruriko-sama and Misuzu-sama」

Kudou papa.

「No…I received orders from Kouzuki-sama…」

「You’re specialized in meddling so you can’t be a proper guard you know?! That’s why I received orders to follow you up」

…as expected.

It’s impossible for him to be a guard because he’s so showy.

He’s just attracting people’s eyes and make it easier for the enemy to come near…

「Seriously…Kudou family was able to take the job of guarding for Kouzuki-sama thanks to me and Haruka! Could you stop being a drag? Michi too…stop the worthless games of practicing Kudou ancient martial arts and learn Karate like Haruka. That’s useless for actual combat…!」

「I take back the words at you…mama-uesama」

「Don’t talk back to your mother!」

The mother scolds Kudou-chan…

Kudou-chan fell silent.

「No…That, Etsuko…you see…Michi-kun’s suddenly making up with a man…then she said that she’ll do nyan-nyan with that man…Aaan…!」

Kudou papa…What’s 『Nyan-nyan』…

「My…isn’t that great? Michi finally has awaken to normal romance. Lesbian is just unproductive. Turn towards boys even further…!」

Kudou-chan…her mother knows she’s a lesbian.

「Then, should mother take you to a concert next time? Mother is actually into the male rock band named 『Destiny』 Shin-chan, the guitarist there is cute!」

…That’s, Mana’s

No…the same hobby as Maika.

…Mother

「But…Michi-kun’s just 15 years old! It’s too early for her to nyan nyan with a man! It’s too early! Nin-nin!」

The excited husband looks in the eyes of his wife.

「…Just how old I was when you first pushed me down on the bed?」

「Err…I think it was 15 years old」

「How old were you back then?」

「…I forgot it」

「…I’m going to punch you」

Kudou papa answers.

「…I think it was 13 years old, yes」

Eh…Kudou-chan’s father…

…is much younger than the mother…?

「It’s often said that high school men are swept by their sexual desire…!」

「That’s that…and this is this…!」

「…What’s that?」

「Because…I’m seriously worried about Michi-kun from the bottom of my heart!」

Kudou papa holds to his wife.

「Women have their virginity broken sooner or later…be an adult, you too!」

「No, I won’t accept that! If it’s going to be broken by another man, then…!!!」

At that moment…Kudou mama’s roundhouse kick hits Kudou papa’s head magnificently.

「T-That’s Kudou style reverse propeller kick…you, since when did you…!」

「That’s just a karate round kick! Don’t name my moves by yourself, it’s about time you stop that!!!」

The wife yells.

「In the first place…you always just stick to Michi…try to communicate with the elder sister too!」

「Because…Haruka」

Kudou papa becomes timid.

「He’s always looking at me like a garbage…also, she has grown bigger…」

「…What?」

「Even though when you were 15, you were much cuter and smaller than me…!」

「…I’ll kill you if you say anything further than that」

「I love little girls!!」

「…You lolicon!!!」

Once again…Kudou mama’s kick hits Kuodu papa…!

…But

Kudou papa holds the leg with one hand…!

「I caught it! Michi!」

「…Yes, father!!!!」

Kudou-chan seems to have thrown something at the onlookers!!

The onlookers flinched!

But, it’s too late…!

The capsule thrown away hits an onlooker’s head then broke!!!

Paaaaaa!…red dusts scatters in the area.

「Geho…geho…!!」3

The onlooker coughs violently…!

「Did you see the power of genuine chili…secret technique『Red rain in Berlin』!!!!」

Surely…the dust entered the eyes of the onlooker, he’s shedding tears violently.

He’s spilling tears red from the powdered chili…

…『Berlin’s』the only one I don’t get the meanig

「Oops…you too!」

Kudou papa sets his eyes on another onlooker then rushes to him…

That man tries to escape but…

He won’t make it anymore…

「…Lightning Kudou Kick!!!」

Kudou papa’s jumping kick hits the back of the man!

The man stumbles on the floor…!

「&…Devil Chopp!!!」

Then he strikes the man’s nape with his hand!!

The man faints down!

「…Here I come!」

Meanwhile…Kudou-chan rushes to the man who received the chili powder.

She grabbed the head of the man who’s violently coughing…

「…World…Shaking!!!」

She kneed him to the face!!!

That man…nosebleeds then fell down.

「…Fuu, I kicked another dull one again!」

Kudou-chan’s line is perfect.

…Err

…W-What’s this?

「…Which one is Yuzuki-san?」

Kudou papa goes towards our car.

「…Me」

Minaho-neesan got off the car and replied.

「Kouzuki-sama’s message…『Cesario Viola took four men and got off the Central airport the day before yesterday』」

…Four men?

Furthermore…they came from a local airport making it hard to be discovered.

「These are the two of them. They must’ve come as scouts…they were waiting for us to let down our guard then approach us」

…Wait?

It’s true that the man Michi attacked is hiding under a hat and a coat, but…

He looks like a foreigner now that I look closely.

I can see Kudou-san like a real Japanese but…is this a disguise?

「We were told to cooperate with you people and try to eliminate that Cesario and the American criminals…」

That’s…Kouzuki『Kakka’s』orders

Kudou-san’s not a guard but a dispatch to repel Cesario Viola…?

Could it be that Kudou-chan too???!

「Well…Anyway, with these two taken care off…there’s three remaining」

Saying that, Kudou papa smiles…but, Kudou-chan

「…Papa…this one’s wrong」

…Ha?

「The one I knocked down definitely is the person on the surveillance image from the airport…but, the one father has beaten up is…」

「…No way, is it a substitution?」

The father screams and sharpens is eyes…Kudou-chan

「I think it’s a mistaken identity…!」

He just kicked and chopped an unrelated person…

And even made him faint…!???!

1. Oh boy, that’s something you shouldn’t have done Michi-kun ↩

2. Subarashiidesuuuuu!!!! ↩

3. It’s a coughing sound ↩

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