[Quick Pass] Why Don’t You Love Me

As soon as Xu Yiwen entered the house, he felt something was wrong. He raised his wrist and looked at his watch. Well, it was only half past four. At this moment, Ivan should not be off work. Why... He carried the shopping bag and put the inside first. The vegetables, fresh meat, fruit, milk, etc. were sorted out, and then the refrigerator door was closed. I was still wondering why the light at home was turned off when he left, and why it suddenly turned on now.

But if Ivan was at home, he wouldn't be so quiet. That guy loves lively and is always full of energy. Thinking of her lover's cute appearance, Xu Yiwen smiled, with pampering and pampering in her smile.

He and Ivan met when they were in college, but at that time he was a professor and Ivan was a student. Originally, Xu Yiwen was not crooked. Although he had never been in a relationship, he was convinced that the objects of his yj and x fantasy for the first time were all beautiful girls with **** and thin butts.

So at first, Xu Yiwen was troubled when Ivan stalked him. He is a very stable man. He doesn't want to ruin the student's reputation because of this, so he always talks to Ivan with good words and avoids Ivan every day. During that time, it is interesting to think about it now. Xu Yiwen always thinks, if he knew he would love Ivan so much, with the risk of being dismissed from school and breaking with his family, if he now lives by writing a manuscript at home and staying with Ivan, he would Wouldn't it be so resistant, so wouldn't the two of them have more good times together?

It took Yifan three years to chase Xu Yiwen-he is different from Xu Yiwen, he is naturally curved and likes tall men, and Xu Yiwen is no different from one of them. So many girls in the school have a crush on him, but this handsome and mighty man now belongs to him.

Although Xu Yiwen always avoided him and rejected him before they were together, Xu Yiwen loved him very much since the two established a romantic relationship. After the school found out about the two of them, Xu Yiwen was expelled as soon as possible, and Yifan continued to stay at the school because the family had money. Although the family froze all his credit cards for this reason, and did not leave him cash, Xu Yiwen took on the heavy task of supporting Ivan. Yifan is very squeamish and uses the best food, clothing, shelter and transportation. Fortunately, Xu Yiwen has the ability to write manuscripts day and night, and he can earn 10,000 yuan a month. It is not a problem to maintain the daily expenses of the two.

But Xu Yiwen loves Ivan very much. It’s been a long time since he bought new clothes, but he bought Ivan brand-name coats, brand-name shoes, brand-name skin care products, and then used the little money he saved to hit his parents’ card, showing a little filial piety—though They once threatened him not to go back unless he repented.

Poverty is the point of being poor, but very happy, at least Xu Yiwen feels that way living in chai, rice, oil and salt. He felt that there was nothing wrong with living like this for the rest of his life. At the beginning, he didn’t accept Ivan, because he didn’t like him. Later, when he got in touch with him more, he realized that Ivan is a very innocent and kind man. His heart was moved. He didn't agree with it, it was unreasonable, and he never flinched.

He felt that he should work harder so that Ivan could live a better life.

The two have known each other for seven years. During this period, Yifan spent three years pursuing Xu Yiwen, and the remaining four years were the same as mixing oil in honey.

Xu Yiwen really wants to spoil Ivan. He does everything he can to give him the best food, clothing, shelter, and transportation. On weekdays, he also studies recipes to cook for Ivan, washes his clothes and socks, and in winter Ivan shouts that his feet are cold. , Xu Yiwen put his feet in his arms to warm him. Even Ivan always yelled pain in bed recently and said that he didn't want to do it, Xu Yiwen never forced it.

He feels that the spiritual union is better than the physical one, so he doesn't emphasize desires.

Back in the bedroom, Xu Yiwen saw Ivan packing his suitcase. He was stunned for a moment: "What's wrong, where are I going?" Ivan has been raised by him after graduating from university. He has never worked. Apart from hanging out with friends and never packing up his suitcase, Xu Yiwen had also helped him before. Packed up.

Yifan's movements froze. He had too many things that Xu Yiwen bought for him. He didn't want to come back to pack up, but he wanted to see Xu Yiwen.

He slowly stood up from the ground, afraid to look at Xu Yiwen's gentle eyes: "Yiwen, let's... break up, I'm getting married."

Xu Yiwen thought that he might be dreaming.

Ivan suddenly became excited: "I have never told you. Actually, I had a girlfriend. My mother introduced her. Her family is very rich. My mother said that she would like me when she saw my photos. If we get married, my family will be able to win a big project. I'm sorry, I... I really don't want to have such a painful life anymore. I can't bear it anymore!"

Xu Yiwen felt that he had become very dull. He understood every word Ivan said, but when these words were combined to form a sentence, he couldn't understand it. What is... such a painful day? Xu Yiwen murmured: "Aren't we happy together?"

"Not at all!" Ivan roared, then turned his head in anger. "Perhaps it was at the beginning, but after the freshness passed, I didn't feel happy at all! I used to buy whatever I wanted. I used the best for food, clothing, housing and transportation, but after being with you, I want to buy something. I have to hesitate again and again, because you can only make so much money a month, and you have to pay rent and buy food. I grow up so well. My mother has said that I enjoy happiness since I was a child! I think it clearly, I don’t love it at all. You! I just love your appearance and like your character, so I mistakenly thought it was love. Did you know? If it weren’t for me and some friends to play with, I wouldn’t be able to live like this at all! I can do it in front of them Be happy, but make a strong smile in front of you!"

Having said so much, Ivan gradually convinced himself. He feels that he is not wrong, he just wants to pursue a better life, what's wrong?

At this moment, he forgot the pledge he had made to the man in front of him. He forgot how he used to pursue this man, stalking and bend this man, and then this man gave up his job and gave up. I took care of his family and worked hard to make money to support him. I took good care of him... In the past few years when the two were together, Ivan's skin has become better and more beautiful, and his hair is black and thick. Whose credit is this?

But at this moment, because Xu Yiwen can't afford his luxurious life, Ivan can't stand it anymore.

He was heartbroken, thinking that anyway, the words of the breakup were also spoken, so you might as well let Xu Yiwen completely give up on himself: "I never told you before. I dated her half a year ago. Our two families discussed it a few days ago. I'm going to get engaged soon, so I have to split it up with you and move back home."

Xu Yiwen was silent for a long, long time. Just when Ivan thought that this man's madness of loving him would definitely haunt him, Xu Yiwen calmly took a step back: "You go."

For a moment, Ivan suddenly felt great fear. It seemed that when Xu Yiwen said these three words, he had already pronounced the break between them. He loves Xu Yiwen undoubtedly, but he loves extravagant life even more.

Xu Yiwen watched Ivan hurriedly pulling the suitcase to leave, only to find that Ivan's things in the room were gone. The box just now was the last thing he left here.

Xu Yiwen slowly sat on the ground, his eyes a little dull, and he didn't know what he was thinking. I don't know how long it took before he felt dull pain after another in his chest. The pain made him want to die. He gave all his love and tenderness to Ivan. They had agreed more than once to grow old together, even though so many people disagree, so many object, and so many people say how disgusting homosexuality is, but Xu Yiwen has always believed. Has not flinched.

And now Ivan pulled away mercilessly, making him feel like a joke.

How can people speak without counting?

How could Ivan do this to him?

Xu Yiwen sat motionless on the ground, and the quiet house gradually became pitch black. Only the living room lamp was still shining with a soft yellow light. Xu Yiwen hasn't moved, he doesn't feel hungry or thirsty, only crazy heartache.

He remembered seeing Ivan seven years ago. When Ivan was in his first class, his eyes were bright and dazzling. He remembered the three years of being chased, and remembering the days and nights when I was dependent on each other, Xu Yiwen Finally let out a howl!

He didn't cry, he was a man of firm character, he would not regret it if he made up his mind. So he fell in love with a man, broke with his parents who couldn't understand him for love, was expelled from school, and then slowly climbed up.

He was just howling, screaming, hoarse, but the pain in his chest still didn't relieve. How can it hurt so much, how can it hurt so much!

He doesn't want to hurt! I don't want to think about that person named Ivan anymore! I don’t want to replay scene after scene in front of them for the past seven years of knowing and loving each other!

But for the past seven years, it has grown into his flesh and blood, entangled with his soul, and cannot be separated.

Xu Yiwen began to smash his head with his fist, but the more he smashed, the clearer Ivan’s voice and smile became clear. He had a small dimple when he laughed, and his hair was soft when he was rubbed. He always likes to put his arms around his neck and say something. Sweet words, once said, never separate...together for a lifetime...

Xu Yiwen is going crazy. He doesn't want to be a man with no grace, so Ivan wants to leave, he doesn't want to stay, but now he knows how painful the bite is, he can't even breathe, and the darkness in sight makes his heart tremble violently. , I just want to die like this, it's better than lingering and letting the past look in front of me over and over again.

At this moment, a voice came into his mind: "Make a deal with me."