Reckless Youth of Delinquency
Text Chapter 363: I wish I could never kneel down until I grow up
When a little nurse came over, she also saw people standing in the yard, and asked me quietly: "Are you from the underworld?" I shook my head and said, "No, what's wrong?" The little nurse said, "Nothing. , it’s scary just to see you.” I was even more surprised: “Why?” I thought after thinking that people like me didn’t do anything bad in the hospital. The little nurse said: "I don't know, I just feel that you are different from others. You have that feeling of not being angry and self-defeating, which makes people respect and fear you."
I didn't expect that I would be described as "not angry but self-defeating". Normally I would have laughed, but now I feel quite helpless. The little nurse said again: "It will be time to visit in a moment. Please prepare to see who can go in. Only three people can go in." I looked at Qi Siyu who was kneeling at the door and said, "Let her go in." It's the last chance. Whether Ye Zhan can wake up or not, success or failure depends on this. Next to them, Ye Zhan's parents gasped slightly and were obviously getting nervous.
When the time came, when the three of them entered, Mother Ye's legs shook and she almost fell to the ground. With the support of Qi Siyu and Ye's father, Ye's mother stood up again. The three of them walked in together, and the door of the custody room was closed heavily. An hour, only an hour. If Ye Zhan doesn't wake up, we will never hear his voice or see his smile again.
The moment the door closed, the emotions that had been building up for several days suddenly burst out. I seemed restless, stood up, walked up and down the corridor, and began to think about a question I had never thought of before. If Ye Zhan really can't wake up, what should he do in the future? I looked out the window, and they were all still standing motionless in the yard. Everyone was waiting for this critical moment.
The attending doctor who had performed surgery on Ye Zhan also came over and asked me why I didn't go in to visit him. I said that another friend had gone in. The attending doctor sat on the bench and sighed: "I'll wait a moment to see if a miracle is possible." I hurriedly asked: "Doctor, is there any precedent for waking up at the last moment before?" Doctor Said: "Of course, there are only a few cases. It still depends on the patient's physical fitness and will to survive." I thought to myself that Ye Zhan's physical fitness is not bad. He has survived such serious injuries before. Is it because the will to survive is not strong enough that you still refuse to wake up now?
If that's the case, then why doesn't Ye Zhan want to wake up? I fell into deep thought, what was he running away from? Such a sunny and kind-hearted boy should be full of enthusiasm for life. What happened when he started to escape from the world? I asked the doctor next to me: "Have the patients who finally woke up said what they were thinking about when they were in a coma?" The doctor said: "Theoretically, their minds are thinking about nothing. Their subcortical nerve centers were severely damaged and they completely lost their autonomous consciousness." I said speechlessly: "What about this in reality?"
The doctor said: "I remember a patient who was in a car accident once told me that his last impression before he fell into coma was to see the truck with its snow-white headlights crashing towards him, and he didn't know anything after that. So I I once thought that this patient was reluctant to wake up, probably because he was afraid of seeing the truck with its snow-white headlights again. Simply put, he was escaping from reality and in a state of self-protection. It’s like we suddenly wake up after a nightmare. When you wake up, you will deliberately stop going to sleep, drink water, watch TV, etc. to prevent yourself from entering that nightmare again. And these people who have passed out after being seriously injured still cannot wake up even after surgery. Come, you are in a state of self-protection, afraid of seeing the scene of being hurt again.”
I nodded, probably understanding what the doctor meant. When did Ye Zhan fall into coma? Being beaten by those asshole students in the classroom, or being hung by them above the lecture theater? When it comes to beatings, students like Ye Zhan who have been fighting since childhood should not be able to bear anything. That is when they are hung above the lecture theater. Four to five hundred students are laughing around him. That kind of pressure should not be something ordinary people can bear. bearable. According to the doctor's analysis, Ye Zhan was afraid that he would see such a scene again when he woke up, so he was reluctant to wake up. I asked him again: "Then how do we tell the patient that the danger has passed and that he can wake up with confidence?"
The doctor shook his head: "If I knew, I wouldn't have saved many vegetative people..."
I said angrily: "Ye Zhan is not in a vegetative state yet! It's not until the last minute, so we can't make a casual conclusion!"
"Okay, okay." The doctor said, "Not a vegetative state yet. But you have to know what it means to have the nerve center under the cerebral cortex severely damaged. Your consciousness, thinking ability, and hearing ability are all lost, and you are completely isolated from the world... ...Hey, why am I talking to you so much? I won’t say it anymore, it’s already the seventh day, and there is basically no hope.”
I became even more angry: "You have been doing this for a long time, are you all particularly numb?"
"What doctor is not willing to save the patient in his hands?" The doctor sighed longly.
I was stunned for a moment, with mixed feelings in my heart.
Time passed by, and there were still five minutes left before the visit was over. I was so nervous that I almost suffocated. The doctor also rubbed his hands from time to time, hoping for a miracle during this visit. I clenched my fists tightly, and I didn't dare to have the slightest thought of "what to do if Ye Zhan can't wake up" in my mind. Ye Zhan will definitely wake up, he will!
There was only a "click" sound, and the door to the intensive care unit finally opened. The doctor and I stood up at the same time and looked at the door nervously. Ye Zhan's parents and Qi Siyu came out with red and swollen eyes and a look of despair and helplessness on their faces. I immediately understood what was going on, but I still held a little bit of hope in my heart, just a little bit, a little bit. I asked tremblingly: "How is Ye Zhan?" Father Ye shook his head and sighed, and the middle-aged man choked silently. Ye Mu stumbled and fell directly to the ground. "Auntie!" Qi Siyu cried and went to help her. Ye's mother slapped the floor with her hands and cried bitterly: "My poor son..." Ye's father squatted on the ground and wiped his tears. He was truly desperate.
My heart has sunk to the bottom, as if the whole world has lost its color. I walked tremblingly to the door of the intensive care unit and knelt down wordlessly, tears silently sliding down my cheeks. There's no hope, there's no hope!
God, are you really unwilling to have any miracle happen? I rubbed the door of the intensive care unit and was already crying. I just attended Yang Mengying's funeral yesterday, and today I got the bad news that Ye Zhan would never wake up again. God, how on earth are you going to torture me? I banged my head on the door of the intensive care unit and felt no pain at all, which was far worse than the pain in my heart.
God, what do you want me to do to let such a kind boy go?
I would like to live a long life without being able to kneel down in exchange for his warm smile. How about it? How about it?
Tears covered my face. I had cried too many times these days, but I had never been so desperate.
Several nurses tried to persuade us not to be too sad, but no one listened to them. They were all crying in despair. But what they in the yard didn't know yet was that Ye Zhan would never wake up.
"Don't be too sad." The doctor sighed and said, "According to what our professor said, vegetative people will live in the safest place they have built themselves, where no one or anything can harm them. It can be said that they like that place and feel happy to live there, so they don't want to wake up. You have to be more open-minded. He lives happily and happily in another world, otherwise he would have woken up long ago."
After hearing these words, Ye Zhan's parents cried a little less. Yes, isn't it a good thing that Ye Zhan lives in a place where he thinks he is happy and safe? Just listen to the doctor say again: "The world he built must be more beautiful than this world. You should be happy for him, because he will no longer have sorrow, worry, sadness..."
Hearing this, my heart suddenly trembled. The world that makes Ye Zhan unwilling to wake up is... is...
I stood up and said tremblingly: "Doctor, can you let me go in again?"
The doctor looked at me doubtfully and said, "No, the hospital has regulations and we can only visit during the allowed time."
I walked over, tried my best to suppress my emotions, and said: "Doctor, please, let me go in once. I want to talk to him again, maybe... maybe..." I didn't dare to say the words after "maybe" Speaking out, I'm afraid that Ye Zhan's parents will have their hopes up again after hearing this, and if their hopes fail in the end, it will be a huge blow to them.
"This..." The doctor was still a little embarrassed.
"Please!" I knelt down in front of the doctor, tears welling up again: "After today, he will completely become a vegetative state, won't he? Let me talk to him again, please, please. !”
"Hey, don't." The doctor immediately helped me up: "Just go in, there is no need to kneel down. Oh, then you go back quickly. If something happens, I can't take responsibility." Then he called a nurse next to him. , let her take me in.
In the cubicle inside the intensive care unit, I put on a mask, a hat, a disposable sterile gown, and shoe covers, and walked tremblingly toward Ye Zhan's bed. The ventilator was still operating steadily, Ye Zhan still had his eyes closed and his face was pale.
"Ye Zhan..." I called softly, bent down in front of his bed, looked at his face, and said, "Can you hear my voice? I am Wang Hao." Ye Zhanyi Motionless and unresponsive, it seems that he has been isolated from the world.
"Ye Zhan, I know you can hear me." I breathed heavily, but I managed to soften my voice: "Besides, I also know where you are. I've been to that place too, right?"
Ye Zhan remained motionless. I continued: "In front of you is the blue, calm and endless sea, and under your feet are white flowers and soft sand. The sun shines warmly on your body, the breeze gently blows your cheek, the whole world is so empty, And you are the only one here. You can sing loudly, run and jump here, and no one can hurt you anymore, and no one can get close to you. Right, are you in a place like this? "
It was very hot in the ICU and I started to sweat after a while. Ye Zhan still had no response, so I continued: "You hid here alone, did you forget me? Didn't you say that I am the person you trust most in the world? I have been looking for you for a long time. For a long time, I rode the wind and waves, wading through mountains and rivers. Ye Zhan, have you seen that lonely boat on the ocean? I stepped on the deck of that boat, riding the wind steadily towards you. Ye Zhan, You can hide from everyone, but you can’t hide from me.”
"Ye Zhan, you said that we would be good brothers for life, so how could you leave me and hide here alone? Now I have reached the shore and gently jumped off the beach. Ye Zhan, look at it Come on, I’ve been looking for you for a long time. I’m so happy now, aren’t you willing to talk to me?”
"Ye Zhan, talk to me. I am your best brother in the world. I am willing to bear all the suffering and sorrow with you..." I stared at Ye Zhan nervously. I don't know if this will work, but I have to give it a try.
"Ye Zhan, I am so tired. I have been wandering on the sea for seven days and seven nights, just to find you and talk to you. Are you unwilling to pay attention to me? You are sitting on the beach, enjoying the sun and breeze, don't you want to Share these with me?”
"Well..." Ye Zhan's mouth suddenly moved. My heart suddenly accelerated several times!
"You... want to eat coconut?" Ye Zhan said softly.
My tears burst out suddenly, the blood all over my body boiled, and my hands and feet even kept shaking.
I couldn't wait to say: "Eat, of course. I will eat as much as you pick for me. If you can, you will eat me to death!"
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