She Chooses To Destroy the World
Chapter 34: Gods and believers.
This question stumped Alice for a while.
Although it sounds strange, she never thought about it.
When she lost her mother, she met Cecilian when she was in distress. When she prayed to him, apart from her disgust for the family goddess, Fogna, she yearned for something similar to her mother. Love. At that time, Cecilian's gentle voice fell from the sky. Although she did not immediately accept her as a believer, she pointed out a clear path for her, and gave her a lot of help no matter what. Especially afterwards, He saved her life, and the grace of such a re-creation is equal to the kindness of the mother.
But to say that Alice treats him as a woman, and treats him as a mother... it's definitely not the same thing.
Although Alice still misses her mother often, she is no longer a child. She could tell that her love for Him was very different from her love for her mother. But to say that this is just a common emotion between a **** and a believer, Alice doesn't feel like it, at least Alice is sure that her mood when she prays is completely different from her mother's mood when she prays to Fergna.
So does she treat him as a man?
Alice couldn't help but compare him with the men she knew around her. This was actually a bit difficult. She had no father since she was a child, and her understanding of men always seemed to be a little worse. She knows a lot of people, but not many who are really close. Only Master Roma, her boss Hewlett when she was a waitress, and Burke, who grew up together, are the only ones who can be called familiar. As for Master Etienne, he was handsome, and he helped her several times, and even generously gave her valuable armor. It should be very intimate, but Alice always felt that a noble-born saint like Master Etienne The job holder can only watch from afar, she is very far away from him, and it is even harder to tell who he is.
Burke caused her a lot of trouble at the beginning. Although she no longer feels resentment, she still doesn't want to think of the memories related to it anymore; Hewlett, as a tavern owner, his gentleness is kind. Cilian was a bit like, but his attention was all on Lena, and he would hardly be divided among others. It was not so much gentleness, it was more forgiving that he didn't care.
Not to mention Master Roma. He has been her guardian for several years. Although sometimes he may seem unreliable, but emotionally speaking, he is a bit like Alice's father. Alice can be sure that she must not think of Circillian that way.
If you want to compare these people with Circe... no matter what, they don't feel right, they can't be placed on the same level, even if they just imagine that they are the same sex, it feels weird. In Alice's mind, Cecilian is just Cecilian. She can't frame a role for him in known social relationships, so naturally she can't judge, and she prefers which gender she wants him to be.
She actually thought about it so carefully, seriously annoyed, and thought for a whole circle, but she didn't have a clue at all, and she could only answer him honestly:
"I have no idea."
I don't know if Cecilian has overheard the thoughts in her mind again, and there is a little smile in his voice:
"I'm just asking casually. Even if you can tell, I can only transform into an empty physical person at best. I can't become a real male or female. I have no gender. I have to understand human gender. The difference between... is also a bit difficult."
"You... have no gender?"
Although Alice could not define a gender for him, she never thought that the true answer would be this way. The other gods she knows all have genders: the **** of light is male, the queen of light is female, the **** of heroes Bertrach is male, and the **** of family Fogna is female. Everything is clear, no doubt. The only thing that makes people a little entangled is the **** of poets. She has seen the **** of poets in the temple before, and he seems to be half male and half female. However, half-male and half-female are probably considered to be gender-specific, and it seems that the situation is not the same as Circilian.
"I am different from the other gods. They were born in a human way and established their gender at birth. And I am a **** of a new generation. I am the essence, the idea, and the logos. You can Ever heard that ideas have gender?"
idea? Logos? What's all this?
The conversation began to develop in the direction that made Alice a headache again, but this time the object of the conversation was not the elder mother, but Circrian. She wanted to know more about him, so she tried to concentrate and keep up with her thoughts:
"Aren't you also a child of the Great Mother God? Why are you different from other gods?"
"The mother **** has many forms of fertility. She first gave birth to the **** of light Nagari and the **** of night Ludenier, and then gave birth to other gods. I was born after them, and I was condensed from the spiritual power of the **** mother. Born, although the form is different, we still have the connection of life.
Among the existing gods, only the Queen of Light is not a child of the Great Mother God. The Light God Nagari stole the power of fertility from the Great Mother God, created a companion for herself, and gave her the power of fertility. The gods saw that the Guangming God and his wife had obtained the precious fertility power, so they changed their minds and volunteered to become their dependents. Only the three dark night gods were dissatisfied with the way of the light god, and turned to Ludenier. The dark night type gods are alone in strength, and in any case can't match the light group. But the Guangming family did not destroy the power of Ludenier, and could only coexist with them.
After taking control of the overall situation, the Queen of Light bestowed the power of fertility to the **** of family Fogna, making her the **** of fertility. After that, the fertility power of the Great Mother God was very little left, and she could only rely on the priestess with the blood of the Great Mother God to cooperate with mortals to give birth to mortals with the blood of the God. Those were all ancient heroic figures who opened up new worlds in the ice and snow, and their descendants still rule the north. But by now, the fertility power of the Great Mother God has been completely exhausted, so her priests can no longer reproduce children, and the blood of the Great Mother God has been cut off. "
In addition to answering Alice's question, Cecilian gave a rough overview of the history of the gods. Alice had never heard of this before, and felt somewhat curious. After Cecilian finished speaking, he said to her:
"In the future, you may see the Scriptures of Light, or listen to others telling such stories. The story tellers have different positions, and the story will not feel the same. If you want to distinguish between right and wrong, you need Can see the blind eyes."
He said so, reaching out and touching Alice's eyes. Alice closed her eyes and felt his touch, just listening to him:
"I bless you in the name of Logos. I hope you can see your obstacles clearly and not be deceived."
It seemed that something shiny flew into Alice’s eyes, and her originally drowsy mind suddenly became clear. She opened her eyes and the scene in front of her became clearer. She could actually see the air beside her because of the gods. The existence of, changed the form, vaguely showing an outline similar to a human shape.
Cecilian's hand stroked her face lightly:
"Before I gave you the power to surpass ordinary people; today I bless you again to help you see the obstacles clearly; I will give you all the blessings, you don't live up to my expectations, and throw your life lightly."
Alice nodded lightly, feeling He held her hand and put her finger on her covenant ring. The ring suddenly became hot, almost unbearable. For a moment, Alice almost thought it was going to burn like this, but it turned cold in the end and stayed calmly on her finger, as if there was no change.
Cecilian did not explain what he was doing, but Alice could see that he was very dissatisfied with the existence of this ring.
If Alice had a choice, she wouldn't want to wear such a ring. But in front of Earl Rachel, she was still too insignificant, that there was no possibility of rejection at all. She lowered her head and looked at the ring, not knowing whether she was comforting Circillian or comforting herself:
"When you wake up from your deep sleep, this ring can be taken off. For this purpose, I will do my best."
After she said this, she suddenly felt a hand on her head and gently stroked her forehead, full of love and compassion in her movement. She leaned in his direction and felt his chest touched...His temperature was very similar to that of a human being.
Alice sighed for a long time, feeling that the fatigue and anxiety that had been so long had gone away from her. She closed her eyes and asked:
"I lost my chain mail, can you give me a hint?"
"What is destined to belong to you will not be lost." When answering such questions, Cecilian always speaks like a guessing, "If you are destined to be its owner, it will come back to you. ."
Alice wanted to ask Cecilian whether that chain mail was something destined to belong to her. Except for her great sword, that was the best thing she had ever gotten in her life, and her heart was about to be cut in half.
Probably noticing her loss, Cecilian comforted her:
"You will have better armor than that in the future, as much as you want."
"But it was given to me by Master Etienne."
When Alice mentioned Etienne, Cecilian's tone became a little subtle:
"As a god, I probably shouldn't interfere with your circle of friends, but I must remind you not to get too close to the temple priest. Now you have officially become a believer of me. In any case, don't meet with him again."
"Why?"
"They have all vowed to dedicate everything to the God of Light. The God of Light can see the outside world directly through their eyes. If the God of Light realizes that you have become my believer, he will definitely do everything possible to kill you."
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