Siheyuan: Start as a truck driver

When passing by Banggan, Jia Zhang suddenly heard a sound like a mountain falling and the ground cracking.

At the same time, a foul smell quickly spread to the surrounding area.

The nearest stick bear the brunt of the attack.

He almost fainted from the stench, covered his nose, squatted on the ground and retched.

And Mrs. Jia Zhang also stopped, half of her face showed the relief of release, and the other half showed the embarrassment and embarrassment after incontinence.

Qin Huairu is younger than Jia Zhang, has nimble legs and feet, and can run a little faster than Jia Zhang.

However, it's only a little bit.

When he was less than ten meters away from the latrine, Qin Huairu also heard a loud noise.

Gray-brown fireworks bloomed in the pants.

Qin Huairu looked ashamed and angry, then staggered into the latrine with awkward steps.

However, she didn't realize that when she was exhaling, an unlucky child was standing behind her.

The hiccups that Qin Huairu almost lost in his intestines were swallowed up.

The unlucky boy never thought that he would be attacked at the feet of the Emperor.

He was stunned for a long time before he reacted.

He rubbed his messed up hair with one hand, covered his nose with the other, and burst into tears.

While crying, she called her mother and walked home.

"Mom, Aunt Jia pulled her crotch and almost smoked me to death. It stinks so much!"

The child's cry was like a sharp knife, cutting through the silence of the cold night.

The lights of each house in the courtyard came on one after another.

"What, Aunt Jia? Isn't that Qin Huairu?"

"It's really embarrassing for such a big man to poop his pants."

"Elbow, elbow, elbow, go watch the fun!"

...

Everyone who was about to go to bed on the kang put on their clothes and prepared to eat melon.

As soon as he poked his head out of the room, he covered his mouth and nose and shrank back.

"What the fuck, the Jia family is in a shit fight again?"

…

Anyone who has ever had a stomachache knows one thing.

That is, when you have a stomachache, no fart is worthy of trust.

And once it is released, a series of attacks will follow, like a machine gun.

That's what Jia Zhang is like.

The first time you experience incontinence, it's like pulling a trigger.

Boom!!…Bang!!!…Porphyri…Puff…

It's obviously just exhaust, but it also releases a sense of rhythm.

However, Jia and Zhang, like middle-aged and elderly women of this era, wore belts on the legs of their trousers.

The gas cannot be released, and the wide polyester pants expand at a speed visible to the naked eye.

In just a moment, Jia Zhang's body swelled up into something less than human.

"Fuck you, giant view!"

Everyone who had resisted the stench and came was shocked.

This kind of strange thing has really happened to them for a long time.

Everyone was stunned outside the middle courtyard, not daring to come forward.

At this time, Yan Bugui in the front yard was also alarmed.

There were too many melons tonight and he didn't want to eat any more.

But I thought that as the eldest son of the courtyard, I should always take responsibility.

He just put on his cotton-padded jacket, huddled his hands in his sleeves, and walked towards the central courtyard.

But as soon as he stepped into the middle courtyard, he immediately shrank back.

"Da Sima said that if the situation is not right, I will retreat first. This wave is not about betraying teammates, escaping is to stop losses!"

Yan Bugui turned around and ran away.

I don’t care about this great man!

...

The entire courtyard has been turned into a biochemical laboratory by Jia Zhang. Whoever enters will die.

Bangge ran slowly because of his lameness, so he was fainted when Jia Zhang released him for the second time.

Mrs. Jia and Zhang were stunned on the spot. It was neither possible to leave nor not to leave.

She was afraid that if she left, all the stuff in her trouser legs would flow out.

But if I don’t leave, I’m afraid I’ll be watched like monkeys after a while.

In the backyard, Yi Zhonghai lay down.

His injuries have almost healed in the past two days.

He is an old man but he is about to accomplish something good with Aunt Yi in his arms.

Suddenly there was a thunderous noise outside, which scared Aunt Yi and thought it was going to rain.

He quickly jumped down from the kang and prepared to collect his clothes.

However, after leaving the house, I realized that the sky was full of stars and it didn't look like it was going to rain at all.

At this time, the sound came again. Aunt Yi listened carefully and then confirmed that the sound came from the central courtyard.

He quickly went back to the house and called Yi Zhonghai up.

"Lao Yi, something seems to have happened in the Intermediate Court!"

When Yi Zhonghai heard this, he immediately became excited.

Generally speaking, if there is any commotion in the Intermediate Court, it is probably related to He Yuzhu and Xu Damao.

But now Xu Damao has been taken away by the street police station.

Even if Silly Zhu wanted to make trouble, he wouldn't be able to praise him.

In this case, it's probably the damn truck driver who's causing trouble again!

Yi Zhonghai put on his coat and hurriedly walked to the courtyard.

Before he reached the middle courtyard, he saw everyone hiding behind the wall.

"You people don't have any sense of the overall situation. When something goes wrong in the Intermediate Court, you don't go to help and you hide here. It's really disappointing!"

Yi Zhonghai shook his head and criticized a few words, then straightened his collar and continued to move forward under the admiring eyes of everyone.

As soon as he stepped into the yard, he smelled a foul smell that almost made Yi Zhonghai vomit out his dinner.

He wanted to retreat, but he thought of what he had just said.

Just cover your mouth and nose and move forward despite the stench.

After a while, I saw the stunned Jia Zhang.

Her fat back is still easy to recognize.

After all, apart from her, all the other elderly people in this yard are not skinny?!

It's just that she looks a little strange now.

The bulging trouser legs look like elephant legs.

And the smell seemed to come from her body.

However, Yi Zhonghai's attention did not stay on Jia Zhang for long.

Because he found the stick lying on the ground.

died?!

Yi Zhonghai was shocked and almost cried.

He quickly ran forward and squatted down to check the condition of Bangge.

I stretched out my hand and pushed twice, and shouted twice more, but there was no response at all.

Sparks of anger burst out from Yi Zhonghai's eyes, he raised his head and shouted at Jia Zhang, "Damn old woman, what did you do to BangGeng?"

Mrs. Jia Zhang originally felt somewhat guilty because she fainted due to the smoke.

Now when she heard that Yi Zhonghai dared to yell at her, she immediately became furious.

"Yi Zhonghai, Banggeng is my grandson, what do I do to him is none of your business?

If you have time to mind your own business, you might as well go home and take care of your wife who can’t lay eggs!"

At this time, in order to avoid the biological and chemical weapons, Aunt Yi and everyone watched from a short distance away.

It sounded very real.

Being unable to have children has always been a pain in her heart.

Jia Zhang's words were like an awl, digging into her heart and stirring it a few times.

How can Aunt Yi still endure this?

He immediately walked out regardless of the risk of being fainted.

"Old immortal, who are you scolding? I can't have children, but it's better than all your children having white-eyed wolves.

He spent the whole day lying on other people's bodies to suck blood, and also did some petty theft.

Why didn’t you wake up after being in jail last time?”

Has Mrs. Jia Zhang ever been pointed at the nose and scolded like this?

But when it comes to words, Aunt Yi is not inferior to her.

The two had quarreled frequently when they were young, and she never won once.

It doesn't matter, it's noisy, she has a trick up her sleeve.

Squat down and start rolling.

Perhaps because she was so excited, Jia Zhang even forgot about her physical condition.

It's okay if I don't squat, but when my body squats, my already full pants are instantly squeezed out of shape.

Some dirt flowed directly from the trouser legs.

Either way, her stomach hasn't felt better since just now.

Squatting is like a signal.

Boom!!…Bang!!!…Porphyri…Puff…

A series of sounds came from her again.

Yi Zhonghai and Aunt Yi were both shocked and opened their mouths wide.

Seeing the dirt flowing out of Jia Zhang's body, she even forgot to cover her mouth and nose.

The stench was directly breathed into their lungs by the two of them, and they began to vomit on the spot.

The stench of excrement mixed with the sour smell of vomit permeated the entire courtyard.

The moon is red.

...

Inside the house, Wang Weidong was sipping brown sugar water and was very glad that he had installed the door.

At the same time, he is also worried about the physical quality of people in this era.

Just two jars of pickled cabbage made such a big fuss.

It's really incredible.

In later generations, people have already experienced half of the periodic table of elements.

Things like Sudan red, waste oil, clenbuterol, plasticizers, cadmium rice, "post-70s" pig trotters, "post-80s" chicken wings... are all out of the question.

As for instant noodles, Wang Weidong ate more than half a truckload.

Thinking about it this way, the brown sugar water in the enamel jar seems to taste a bit wrong.

...

It is different from Wang Weidong's calmness.

In the Silly Pillar House, the He family brother and sister were discussing a sum of money from He Yuyu.

He Yuyu’s bride price.

In this era, when rural people get married, they just go to the city to pull out a few feet of floral fabric, prepare a washbasin, a kettle, light a torch (that is, a flashlight), and spend fifty or sixty yuan to set up a banquet.

In poor areas, a bag of rice and a few kilograms of meat are considered betrothal gifts.

However, since ancient times, the residents of the capital have had their own pride.

When it comes to important life events like getting married, we are quite particular about it.

Xiao Pian, a police officer from a good family, sent him a hundred yuan in cash as a betrothal gift.

With the betrothal gift, it is natural to have a dowry.

He Yuyu wanted Shazhu to help prepare a few quilts.

After all, when a woman gets married without any dowry from her mother's family, she will be looked down upon by her husband's family.

And Sha Zhu wants to borrow the money to help Sister Xiao Qin who is in trouble.

Of course He Yuyu disagrees.

If the money is lent out and it comes to your husband's house empty-handed, you will not be able to hold your head high for the rest of your life.

Seeing that there was no hope of borrowing money, Shazhu lost interest in talking to He Yuyu.

He stood up and walked to the door before turning back and saying, "Just take care of the dowry yourself. You don't need to ask me again!"

Hearing these words, He Yuyu's expression froze obviously.

But she quickly adjusted and said with a smile: "I understand, brother, please go out and take a look. I seemed to have heard Sister Xiao Qin's shout just now."

Shazhu had also vaguely heard some noise before, and it sounded like it was Qin Huairu's.

But with just that sound, he thought he was hallucinating.

Now that he heard what He Yuyu said, he couldn't help but glared at He Yuyu fiercely: "I didn't tell you earlier!"

At the same time, the sound of quarrel between Aunt Yi and Jia Zhang also came from time to time.

Silly Zhu didn't care to talk to He Yuyu any more, he quickly opened the door and rushed out in a vigorous manner.

However, after walking a few steps, he was overwhelmed by the strong stench in the yard.

Silly Zhu subconsciously wanted to return to the room, but turned his head without thinking and saw the door being closed with a bang.

And He Yuyu's voice also came from inside the house.

"Brother, you'd better go and see Sister Xiao Qin quickly, maybe something happened to her!"

Silly Zhu thought so, so he gave up the idea of ​​returning and walked forward despite the stench.

Not long after, they came to Yi Zhonghai and Aunt Yi who were vomiting.

"Uh-huh~ Uncle Yi, uh-huh~ What's wrong with you, uh-huh~"

"Shout, call someone, take Banggan to the hospital, he was fainted by Jia Zhang's smoke!" Yi Zhonghai resisted retching and said a complete sentence.

After Si Zhu heard this, he didn't take action immediately.

He looked at Jia Zhang who was pretending to be dead and the disgusting filth on the ground.

I couldn't hold it back anymore, so I said, "Grandma Zhang, why are you pulling your crotch?"

There was obvious schadenfreude in his tone. Normally, Jia Zhang would have pounced on her face to deal damage.

But the matter of pulling her crotch in public has completely shattered her face which is thicker than the city wall.

I can only curse Silly Zhu silently in my heart.

'Damn stupid Zhu, dead broke, no one to support him when he is old, he will die!'

Silly Zhu felt bored, curled his lips, picked up the stick from the ground and walked out.

Maybe he remembered the anger he had suffered in front of Jia Zhang and Qin Huairu being bullied by Jia Zhang. When he was about to reach the front yard, Silly Zhu suddenly started shouting loudly.

"Dear neighbors, are any of you guys willing to come out and help me? Grandma Jia in the middle courtyard pooped her crotch and it's all over the floor. If we don't take care of it, this courtyard won't be able to treat people!"

When Jia Zhang, who was pretending to be dead, heard this, she was so angry that she rolled her eyes and fainted.

This chapter is not over yet, please click on the next page to continue reading! This time I am really dizzy.

It's just that the person fainted, but the body's physiological reaction did not stop, but became more intense.

Yi Zhonghai, who was nearest, heard the firecracker-like sound and his pants that were swollen again after being blocked again.

A terrible thought suddenly flashed through my mind: Could it just explode?

This idea made Yi Zhonghai frightened for a while.

He quickly dragged Aunt Yi away from Jia and Zhang.

Also facing the dilemma was Qin Huairu, who had already rushed into the latrine.

The loud fart at the door made her spurt directly into her crotch.

After finally reaching the latrine, I only took off half of my cotton pants, and another series of fart sounds echoed through the sky.

Now it's better, not only the pants, but also the two snow-white thighs have been dyed yellow.

However, her stomach was still very upset at that time, so Qin Huairu didn't have time to think so much, so she squatted in the pit with the help of the weak moonlight.

After feeling refreshed for a while, Qin Huairu discovered a very serious problem.

There's no way she can get out in this state.

This is embarrassing. Nowadays, unlike later generations, you can call for help.

The only way she had left now was to wait for someone to come in.

However, at this moment, the air in the middle courtyard was filled with intoxicating fragrance, making it impossible for anyone to get close to it.

Qin Huairu squatted in the toilet, her legs gradually shaking.

I don’t know how long it took, but Yanbu Guicong led Director Wang and a group of staff from the sub-district office into the middle courtyard.

Everyone's face was wrapped with a cloth, and looking at their prepared appearance, they really looked like they were dealing with biological and chemical weapons.

Originally, Yan Bugui had already run home and didn't want to meddle in this matter.

He wished that the Jia family would be in bad luck!

But as the eldest and only eldest son in the courtyard, if something happened to the courtyard, he would be seriously derelict in his duties.

After being rejected by everyone asking for help, Yan Bugui had no choice but to go to the subdistrict office to ask Director Wang for help.

Director Wang was very responsible. No matter how bad the reputation of the Jia family was, she still brought people over as soon as she heard about it.

"Xiao Liu, Xiao Zhao, you two go get water and prepare to wash the floor."

"Xiao He, Xiao Qian, and Xiao Zheng, please carry her back to the house. Xiao Zheng, please help her clean up and change her clothes."

The people in front were fine, but the woman named Xiao Zheng turned into a bitter look when she heard that she was asked to help Jia Zhang change her clothes.

Just out of disgust, Xiao Zheng still did not refute Director Wang, and followed two other male colleagues to carry Mrs. Jia and Zhang to Jia's house.

However, not long after the three people entered, they ran out in a panic, as if there were poisonous snakes chasing them and biting them.

Director Wang was directing people to clean up the dirt on the ground. When he saw Xiao Zheng and others running out, he asked in surprise: "What's wrong with you?"

Xiao Zheng gasped and said, "Director Wang, that room is really, really disgusting!"

"Huh? What's going on?"

"You'll know when you go in and take a look."

After listening to this, Director Wang walked into Jia's house with doubts.

After a while, she also hurriedly escaped like Xiao Zheng.

Ha, Jia Xudong eats the most Laotan pickled cabbage.

Jia's house has been reduced to a biochemical experiment site, and the floor is full of filth.

And Jia Xudong looked even more embarrassed.

Qin Huairu and Jia Zhang could still bear it and ran out of the house.

But Jia Xudong could only lie on the bed and transform into Splatoon.

...

(Well, Laotan pickled cabbage noodles are so delicious!)