Song Tan Jishi

Zhang Yanping quickly picked up the phone:

"If you want to make a call, go to the dance studio. If your phone dries up, one of you will have to put it in the iron pot tonight - how does it feel? Is it better than yesterday's sweet potato vine?"

The two geese were immersed in their meal and paid no attention to him. Zhang Yanping also picked up the sweet potato and took a bite.

"Oh, this is so crispy and sweet!"

He was chewing in his mouth, and even if there was no microphone, the nearby mobile phone could completely record it. Everyone in the live broadcast room was so greedy that he almost got pink eye!

And the instigator is still stirring up hatred:

"It's so delicious! It's so delicious! It's no worse than the peaches sold at home! It's so delicious, so delicious - you can't eat such crispy and sweet raw sweet potatoes now, can you?"

The gangster brother was fearless and was not afraid of everyone going crazy on the barrage. Instead, he lowered his head and took a bite, his expression becoming more and more proud:

"Let me tell you, these sweet potatoes have to be freshly dug out to be crispy and sweet when eaten raw! If you take it home and leave it for a few days to lose some moisture and sugar, it won't taste as good. But at that time Roasted sweet potatoes will taste better than freshly dug ones.”

【I won’t listen, I won’t listen, I won’t listen! ! 】

【You are lying! I can eat it raw after a few days of storage. If you don’t believe me, send it over and I’ll eat it to show you! 】

【Brother! Brother, give me a sweet potato, and I will take you to dig for the treasure our gang made thirty years ago! BB machines must have gone up in price, brother! 】

[Good brother, I just came out and saw that my eldest brother became an internet celebrity and ate sweet potatoes...]

Everyone couldn't eat sweet potatoes, and because of love and hatred, they started to talk nonsense in the live broadcast room. Zhang Yanping just chewed the whole sweet potato. When he came over and saw the barrage, he was completely confused:

"You want to hurt both sides! What's the benefit of banning you from my live broadcast room?"

[It’s no good, I focus on someone who dares to go crazy]

[Can’t get tea every morning]

[Can’t get salted duck eggs at noon every day]

[I couldn’t grab even one of the limited quota every day. Even if I climbed up to the China Unicom Tower at night, it was useless]

【Since there is no chance, it is better to die】

[I used to feel that I was like a leek and could not escape the fate of being cut. Nowadays, no one wants to make leeks.】

【Brother! Brother, look at me, brother! I have money! Sell ​​me a box of your sweet potatoes! 】

[I have been domesticated by capital - Brother, sell me a box! 】

Zhang Yanping:......

That thing... it's not like he won't sell it. Isn't he still picking out these things from the gap between Boss Chang's teeth and selling them at low prices every day?

He tightened his face and said solemnly: "As you have seen, my family has only planted less than two acres this year, and there really isn't much to sell - it's not even enough for our own consumption."

"What? You said you can't eat so much at home? Impossible, I can eat three or five in one meal, and I can still show off another bowl of rice..."

But if we continue like this, there will be no end. Zhang Yanping couldn't help but feel depressed: Normally when Qiao Qiao eats, no matter what he eats, he eats openly for others to see, and the barrage doesn't accuse him like this!

In the end, it was my turn to live broadcast, which was good. I was either doing big things like criminal investigation in the live broadcast room or just talking about this...

Then we have to change the subject!

He decisively focused the camera on Dabai and Goose Girl again.

The sweet potato skins on the ground had been quickly swallowed by them. At this moment, the two geese were staring at him with eager expressions. Apparently they remembered that the piece he was holding in his hand was more than they could eat.

If this happens again, wouldn't it mean that the gourd is pressed and the gourd is lifted?

How could Zhang Yanping endure it?

He quickly said: "Dabai, don't just eat and drink stupidly every day... Do you know that you will be transferred to another position next year?"

Dabai tilted his head and looked at Zhang Yanping with doubtful eyes.

I saw Zhang Yanping pointing to the mobile phone:

"Didn't you see? The bullet screens are full of things you want to buy but can't buy. In the final analysis, our product volume is too small - tell me, you, leading this group of ducks, why don't you think about increasing production capacity?"

"There are just dozens of duck eggs a day, what are they enough for?"

"If you weren't an old employee of the family, you would have to deduct your food this time!"

This look of a capitalist training his employees made everyone in the live broadcast room deeply sympathize with him. But what the capitalist said seems to be related to whether they can grab it next year?

Ah this.

This is embarrassing.

Brother Goose, please bear with me! Eat the bitterest of hardships, only then can you be the goose on the goose!

But Zhang Yanping couldn't stop talking once he started talking - why was he so popular in the wholesale market before? Not only because she is white, fat, soft-spoken and sweet, but also because she can talk a lot, and she especially likes to gossip with the three aunts and six wives.

Nowadays, when he talks, he is also eloquent.

"Look, our family owns a large area of ​​​​the river beach, and we will build a large duck shed there next year. The ducks have expanded in size. Do you think you, the duck captain, shouldn't keep an eye on it?"

"We don't count it as a transfer, it's just a transfer - now we are a centurion, next year we will be a thousand households!"

Dabai: ...It talks so much, and it’s not a human. How many words can it understand?

Baymax felt like he was being laughed at.

Its expression gradually became fierce, and it stared at Zhang Yanping with beady eyes, looking down on everyone equally——

"What are you doing?" Zhang Yanping became vigilant: "Tan Tan, I've told you that I won't let you nag people casually when there's nothing wrong... Ouch, Sister Goose! Sister Goose, what are you doing?"

Good guy!

He was hiding from Dabai when he saw Goose Girl twisting her butt and running straight to the pond along the grass, holding a long and thin thing in her long flat mouth!

After a while, he sank, floated on the water, and stepped on the water to the other side of the pond.

Zhang Yanping:......

Glancing at Dabai again, he couldn't help but scolded: "Good guy, you are like a geese in a pond, right? You pretend not to understand when I talk to you, both of your tactics are used on me."

Looking at the barrage again, no one is making jokes or conducting criminal investigations anymore——

[What a great move to hit the east and west, hahaha]

[I have to say that our Goose Girl is really brave! How extraordinary! 】

【that is! The click was as fast as lightning, and I didn’t even see the movement clearly before it took the sweet potato away]

[Not only does it have tactics, it also has self-awareness. Look, the sweet potato it is holding is a long and thin piece. It can just take it away! 】

【yes! If that long flat mouth is big, at most it can rub a layer of skin on it]

[Amazing, Goose Girl is really amazing]

Zhang Yanping saw the focus of the barrage shift, and while he was angry, he still sighed a little.

He let out a long sigh: "Sister Goose, Sister Goose, we are going to entrust you with important responsibilities next year. Why don't you stick to your guns here - tell me, will it be your turn to lead the duck army next year? "

Who doesn't know how to play tactics? He can also use it as a divorce tactic!

"To be smart, we have to be Dabai! Right Dabai?"

He took a look at Dabai, who was still looking fierce. Unexpectedly, Dabai raised his head proudly, then twisted his buttocks and walked towards the pond.

Zhang Yanping: ...Look at you, you goose. No wonder Goose Girl came from behind and you don’t have any brains at all. You don’t know what you are hiding under that little yellow hat!

When Dabai passed by the basket on the side, he suddenly lowered his head, and the little yellow hat flashed past, and with lightning speed, he also took away a piece of the chopped sweet potato head.

Its two wings were spread out, and its buttocks were twisting to create an afterimage. The soles of my feet stepped on the grass, and there was no sound, but I still seemed to be able to hear the clicking sound.

Zhang Yanping:......

【Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha】

【Great pleasure! Realistic and refreshing article]

[The domineering president’s slap in the face is not as satisfying as that of Dabai and Goose Girl! 】

[What’s wrong with the goose? Goose just didn’t have enough for afternoon tea]

[Goose, goose, goose, bow its neck toward the basket. Big yellow hat on the head, flat mouth talking about potato lumps]

[Good poem, good poem! Good goose, good goose! 】

[Let’s just say, it’s not the underworld’s big brother’s fault for this. How can he be as smart as a gangster like us? 】

【that is! The gangster brother hasn’t come ashore yet, and the goose girls have all gone ashore]

[In front of you, you said Big Brother is coming ashore. What kind of shore is this?]

The sun gradually dimmed.

It was getting dark near 5 o'clock, and the sweet potatoes from the two acres of land had been dumped into the truck one after another by Qiaoqiao carrying the baskets.

And in the bleak evening breeze, Zhang Yanping's silent and tall figure stood there, as if he was about to have a team battle in all the Young and Dangerous movies...

All in all, he was hurt inside.

As we all know, people tend to go crazy when they are hurt. For example, at this moment, he finally remembered something serious that he had not seen for a long time:

"Everyone is happy, right?"

"Then let me tell you one more good news - is there anyone in the live broadcast room who loves fishing?"

"Yes, it's what you think. Fishing bait will be available in the store. As for whether this bait is good or not, to be honest, the price is purely half-sale, half-free. Those who are bold and willing to try it can start."

Studio:? ? ?

Good guy, you seller is even more caught off guard than Teacher Qiao. If Teacher Qiao Qiao broadcasts live like today, the thing he wants to sell will definitely be sweet potatoes. you……

You are harvesting sweet potatoes here and you are selling fishing bait. What's going on? You can make more money if you can't hit eight poles!

Everyone is gearing up, cutting nets, changing tablets... In short, even if there is only a glimmer of hope, they will be faster than others!

As for fishing or not...

Just kidding, the store finally has new products, who cares if it’s really fishing? Buy first and then talk.

Zhang Yanping lost face in front of Dabai, and the dignity of the gangster brother had to be exchanged for the pain of others.

So he smiled ferociously: "What? There were originally more than 500 copies tonight, but now it's dark, so we'll only sell 100 copies. The rest will be sold at noon every day."

Studio:……? ? ?

[Why don’t you listen to what you are saying? 】

[Brother, are you speaking human language? 】

[I just had a fight with my nephew, so I grabbed the tablet in an attempt to increase my competitiveness. Are you telling me that I will only sell 100 copies? 】

【Please, big brother! You are a fool if you don’t earn money! Look at the number of viewers above your head! 】

[There are more than 400,000 viewers! Hey! If you sell 100 copies, it’s enough to fill someone’s teeth! 】

However, the gangster brother smiled evilly: "You have also seen that, brother, I am just narrow-minded. Sister Goose doesn't give me face, which makes me uncomfortable. It's not as uncomfortable as others if you are alone - now it's on the shelves!"

He clapped his palms without touching a grain of soil.

…

100 copies are in the live broadcast room. It is not enough to squeeze between teeth. What's more, the bait only costs 39!

God!

It is said that with nine pieces of bait, you can catch fish nine times. Why is it so affordable for anchors? Could it really be half sale and half free?

As for the effect...please, as long as you have bought things from the Lao Song family, can you still have doubts about this now? And the price is only 39!

It can be seen from this that the self-domestication of fans has been successful.

As a result, these 100 copies did not even last a second in the live broadcast room. Many people are just stuck for a while, and then they can no longer purchase.

After the barrage went blank for a short time, more and more people who had failed to make purchases soon came to have fun.

It's strange to say that Qiao Qiao never watches the barrages during live broadcasts, so everyone just posts barrages while asking for sales.

And when it comes to Zhang Yanping, he obviously looks so fierce and speaks rudely, but everyone is more open-minded in front of him, and his tricks are more refined.

Now that he has learned skills from the barbarians, Zhang Yanping cannot resist them.

Fortunately, Qiaoqiao had finished her work and came back with a hoe.

Seeing Zhang Yanping staring at the phone, he came over and asked curiously: "Brother, what were you teaching everyone just now?"

Zhang Yanping sighed deeply: "Thirty-six strategies."

"Wow!" Qiao Qiao had heard such high-end knowledge from the idiom stories told by her new teacher, and had never taught it to children before.

Now when I hear Zhang Yanping say this, I suddenly feel that he is so amazing!

That's not the case.

Zhang Yanping’s inner vicissitudes of life: I’ll practice it myself and show it to everyone!

I looked down at the barrage again - very good, everyone was already laughing like crazy.

It doesn’t matter, Zhang Yanping creates everyone equally:

"Qiaoqiao, I think there are quite a lot of sweet potatoes dug out. Let's pick out the big ones and eat them ourselves. Let's save the remaining sweet potato heads to feed the pigs tomorrow."

If you watch his jokes in the live broadcast room, he also wants to watch the jokes in the live broadcast room. Hehehe, you can’t eat it, you can’t eat it, you just can’t eat it.

But Qiaoqiao was very happy:

"Brother Yanping, how did you know that I was going to teach you how to cook pig food? Uncle Xu asked someone to build a shed and stove next to the pig pen. It will be more convenient to cook pig food when the weather gets cold."

He took a deep breath, as if he could already smell the aroma of pig food, and then pointed at the broken basket of sweet potatoes: "Throw the sweet potato heads into the pot and cook them with wheat bran and rice bran. It must be particularly fragrant!"

Zhang Yanping is going crazy laughing, Qiao Qiao, a great assist!

He glanced down at the barrage and smiled evilly:

"Children, have you heard this? Get up tomorrow morning and live broadcast pig food, and let everyone see how pitiful our pigs are! Only sweet potatoes can be eaten..."

He was yin and yang, but Qiao Qiao disagreed. At this moment, she counted on her fingers:

"Why are there only sweet potatoes?"

"There are sweet potato vines, wheat bran, rice bran, leftovers from the mountains, water hyacinths pulled from the pond, and pumpkins piled in the warehouse...it tastes really good when cooked! Piggy Not pathetic at all."

Zhang Yanping couldn't help laughing, and took another look at the barrage, which was so dense that no line of text could be discerned, and kindly closed them now——

Sure enough, only sincerity is the last resort!

Update one or two, today is a two-in-one chapter.

Why is it almost the middle of the month? My KPI is 120,000 words...