Tang's dining table
Chapter 101 What to do if you can’t beat him?
Ding Dayou taught Yun Chu this move-and-shield kill in his spare time. It seemed like he only moved one step forward, but in fact it was two and a half steps. It was very similar to the step-step when playing badminton.
This is why a badminton player can take care of such a large badminton court by moving only two steps with a racket.
According to Ding Dayou, as long as Yun Chu can attack twice like this in one breath, he can basically be called a powerful soldier among the soldiers.
Yun Chu has been practicing every day for three months. At present, he can still only complete it once between breaths.
The skills taught by the old monkey are rather sinister. He is not tall enough, his strength is not strong enough, his arms are not long enough, and his legs are not long enough to stride. His own conditions are not suitable for face-to-face confrontation with people.
Therefore, his skills lie in poisoning, plotting, raiding, escaping, basically a lot of assassin skills.
In a head-to-head confrontation, Yun Chu wouldn't be afraid of him. The worst he could do was fight with this old monkey and die together.
However, if the old monkey really wanted to kill Yunchu, it was very likely that Yunchu would have died before he even saw him.
Anyway, one time the old monkey was squatting in a manhole without paper. When Yun Chu gave it to him, he found that the old guy had a knife in his crotch...
The old thieves in the Tang army, especially those with the word "founding the country" in front of their title, were all fierce generals who could defeat a hundred with one.
I heard from Ding Dayou that when the Xuanwumen Incident happened, Yu Chigong blocked a bridge alone, and with a horse-drawn sword, two Tang knives, and twelve short spears, he forced a regiment of three hundred led by Prince Liu to attack. The remaining people blocked the other side of the bridge and were killed to a rout.
Yun Chu always felt that Ding Dayou's words contained a lot of bragging. Ever since he saw Ding Dayou tearing so many monks apart, Yun Chu no longer thought it was bragging, but only thought it was Ding Dayou. There is much to beautify Yuchi Gong.
Yun Chu had known Yu Chi Gong for a long time. When he was a child, and when he grew up, he often put Yu Chi Gong's portrait on his door.
I heard that Yuchi Gong now likes to practice Taoism. He never leaves or steps out of the door all day long, and he looks extremely peaceful. Li Zhi heard that he also respects Yuchi Gong very much. As long as he gets good things related to Taoism, he will not Forgot to give Yuchi Gong a reward.
Thinking about it, the best achievements are those who did not go out to found the country. Of course, those who died before victory are even more worthy of everyone's memory.
Liang Jianfang is a real old thief. He is obviously old, but his temper is as hot as a volcano.
Thinking of this, Yun Chu put the armor he had taken out back on the shelf. Anyway, after wearing the armor, it might make the old thief even more excited and he would become even wilder when beaten.
Yunchu also hung the fine cowhide iron shield on the wall. I heard that Liang Laothief's best weapon was a pair of drums and golden hammers. It was said that they were the weapons left by Ma Yuan, General Fubo of the Han Dynasty. A pair of The hammer weighs a full one hundred and sixty kilograms, and a single hammer weighs eighty kilograms.
Unlike the hammer used by He Yuanshan during the Kucha War, it was not as big as a better cantaloupe.
It is inevitable for a strong man to use a strong hammer. If Old Thief Liang could not swing a pair of hammers weighing 160 kilograms, Yun Chu would look down on him.
Anyway, no matter how big the hammer the old thief uses, it is probably not a problem to smash the shield with one hammer and smash Yun Chu into pulp at the same time, so the shield cannot be used.
Martial arts is just like doing math problems. If you can't beat it, you can't beat it. If you can't beat it, you can't beat it. There is no middle way left for you.
Yun Chu thought about how to deal with Old Thief Liang tomorrow for a long time. Finally, at dawn, he decided to ask Cui to prepare a big bath for him, and he wanted to bathe in fragrant soup.
Mrs. Cui didn't understand why the husband, who always had a hard-line style, wanted to bathe in fragrant soup. Without asking, she prepared bath water for him with a lot of dried flower petals and flower oil.
Yunchu soaked in it for a long time before coming out of the water with a fragrant smell.
She also asked Cui to smear a lot of ointment on his body, put on underwear and gauze inner clothes, and then put on a snow-white outer robe. Instead of the black lambskin cloak he wore in the Western Regions, he put on A red fox fur cloak.
She put on a hair ribbon and raised the corners of her eyes. Cui also inlaid a sapphire in the middle of the ribbon.
I used an eyebrow pencil to outline my eyebrows so that they would match the pair of half-finished red phoenix eyes. My face was not white enough, so I used a little powder, and finally bit the matchstick gently. The appearance of a wealthy man with red lips and white teeth appeared in the dim In the bronze mirror, there is more Jia Baoyu than his mother Jia Baoyu.
Ms. Cui loved this look to the core of her bones. She couldn’t wait to find a gold hair ring to tie up Yunchu’s hair, and added a red pom-pom to the gold ring. In her opinion, , a husband with this appearance can truly be called a beauty.
Even though the martial arts of the Tang Dynasty were powerful, they also had no resistance to handsome men with bright eyes and white teeth. Also, I am used to seeing macho men with bulging chest muscles and dozens of abs on their stomachs, so they always look for a few men who look like "Ergazi" for a change.
When Yun Chu stood up from the round stool, a delicate and frail young man from a rich family appeared in front of Cui.
With tears in her eyes, Cui used a hairpin to smooth out a few disobedient hairs and then listened to Yun Chu's instructions.
"With my appearance, I shouldn't be able to withstand a warrior's punch, right?"
"Lang Junjing is talking nonsense. If you look like this, that crazy person will fight you with his fists."
Yun Chu scratched his itchy ears and said, "If I visit someone like this, will they think that a prostitute has come to their door?"
"Bah, bah, bah, Lang Jun is talking nonsense. How can those pickled things be compared with Lang Jun?"
"It's better not to get spanked, otherwise all the ideas I've been thinking about all night will be in vain."
"Who is Mr. Lang going to visit today?"
"My old leader Yanmenhou Liang Jianfang."
"Ah, it turns out that I went to visit Marquis Wu of Liang. Why didn't Mr. Lang tell me yesterday? I can prepare gifts."
Yun Chu shook his head and said, "You don't need to bring any other gifts. All you need to do is fill a pot with the alcohol you personally distilled from the wine."
"Mr. Lang wants to treat someone?"
"Don't ask, go ahead and install it. Remember to reseal the lid, otherwise the thing will escape by itself."
The wine flask was brought, and Yun Chu took a sip. A strong smell of wine went straight to his forehead. After three circles in his forehead, it flowed down and hit his stomach like a stream of fire.
Two blushes appeared on Yunchu's cheeks, which made him, who was already delicate, look even more rosy.
Seeing that it was dawn, Yun Chu did not go to the stable to look for the bay horse. He probably didn't like the bay horse because he looked like this. Naturally, he had to take a car for his trip today.
When Yun Chu came out of the house with a volume of books and a wine flask, all the servants of the Yun family were stunned.
Even Jiu Fei, who always boasted that he had seen the world, was stunned for a while before he raised his thumb and said, "Mr. Lang is really good-looking."
"Shut your stinky mouth and drive hard. The destination is Yanmenhou Mansion!"
When Yunchu got on the carriage, he never opened the curtains again, lest the people of Jinchangfang would see him and think that he had really become a "second-hand man".
Yanmenhou's Mansion is in Tonghuafang, which is very close to the Imperial City. It is the second closest place to the Imperial City. Just like his martial arts, he cannot be ranked among the closest cities.
When Yunchu arrived at the Yanmenhou Mansion in Tonghuafang, a slender figure was already standing there.
When he got closer, he saw that it was Di Renjie.
This discovery made Yun Chu feel warm in his heart, and he immediately decided that if he really needed a friend, this guy could be the first one in line.
"Brother Yun, a certain family was timid and ashamed yesterday. They went back and thought about it all night, and decided to break into the tiger's den of Yanmenhou with my wise brother."
When he saw the Yun family's carriage, Di Renjie couldn't wait to step forward, lift the door curtain, and prepare to pull Yunchu down and break into the dragon's pond and tiger's den together.
When Yun Chu got off the carriage, Di Renjie saw Yun Chu's appearance clearly. As if he was electrocuted, he suddenly let go of Yun Chu's hand and said tremblingly: "Who are you?"
Yun Chu shook his snow-white sleeves and said to Di Renjie with a smile: "With my appearance like this, will Yanmen Hou come up and punch me to death?"
"Why are you like this?"
Yun Chu raised his hand to straighten the sleeves of his robe, and said to Di Renjie: "I've thought about it. In terms of martial arts, I can't beat Marquis Yanmen at all. I don't even have the ability to defend. I can tear apart tigers, leopards and bears with my hands." Compared with Yanmen Hou, those who knew martial arts would only be beaten more miserably. This can be seen from the injuries of the six injured in the Imperial College.
The stronger the martial arts, the more severely they were beaten. The hands and feet of the person with the highest martial arts were broken, and the whole martial arts was considered useless. The old doctor, who didn't know any martial arts, was just thrown out with only a few injuries.
Since Marquis Yanmen regarded beating the teacher as a means of resistance, no one could escape this beating.
In order to avoid being beaten less or not, I had to try my best to make myself appear weaker.
Tell me, with the physical strength I show now, will Yanmenhou think that I am vulnerable and just throw me out of the house? "
"Then you can't make yourself smell good, can you? Oh my God, you actually have rouge on your face?
Oh my God, you made your lips red. Is oral sex a tool that men should use? "
Yun Chu also felt that what he was doing was perverted, so he resisted Di Renjie with his shoulder and said, "Otherwise, you can also dress up so that I won't feel embarrassed."
Di Renjie shook his head resolutely and said, "I would rather reason with Marquis Yanmen!"
Yun Chu sighed, admiring Di Renjie's head in his heart, and deeply regretting his ignorance.
If a humanoid beast like Liang Jianfang could listen to reason, he would no longer be Liang Jianfang.
Anyone who has never seen Liang Jianfang come out of the Chinese army tent covered in flesh and blood carrying a head with half of his vertebrae connected cannot be said to know Liang Jianfang.
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