The Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

When the first rays of sunlight hit the roof beams, a new day had arrived, and it was time to get up, but Caroline still buried her head under the pillow, as if she was trying hard to be a turtle, Lie in bed hard.

"Don't get up, don't get up, that annoying skeleton won't come to me."

Aside from the over-mature makeup and calm demeanor, Caroline always makes people forget her age. Because she was born noble, she is expected to be very high in everything, so she looks more mature in her dealings with others.

But in fact, because he grew up in a deep palace compound, he is actually very simple. His hobbies are reading popular knight novels and sewing. He will cry when he sees something that fascinates him, and he often stays up late to watch all night. He is completely different from ordinary girls What a difference.

As for social etiquette and good conversation, it is all thanks to the hardworking private teacher. If she had let her do what she did, Caroline would have rushed out to take risks like the heroine in a knight novel.

But this time, as the Duke's daughter, her father gave himself a difficult task.

"Caroline, you've heard it too. It's the emperor's will to strengthen the relationship between the upper echelons of the empire and the undead. This time you were chosen to take the Lich Rex on a parade, which is an opportunity to build a good relationship with the undead. , but don’t let the local nobles be too unsightly, stand in line too early, and spread the bad reputation.”

To put it simply, this is to ask her to be careful, not only to strengthen her personal relationship with the Lich, but also not to appear too active in front of human nobles. Originally, as the eldest daughter of a noble family, this level of communication tasks is not a big deal , tutors have long taught various communication skills repeatedly. But really get along. Only then did I find out that there was a lot of trouble.

"It is said that the Erosi red wine in this city is very famous. (Literal translation of the nobleman's way of talking in circles: Haven't eaten lunch yet? Why don't you wait for a drink?)"

All right. When the fire of soul in the skull is quietly burning towards you, even Caroline knows that she has said something wrong, but she is not a person who gives up so easily because of her rough nerves.

"I heard that the master tailor Kakaro's works are quite innovative, and he is even well received in the capital, and I heard that he will be here for a while (your clothes are too old, you want me to accompany you to buy one) clothing?)

Lich Rex looked at his gray robe. This seemingly worn-out robe was enchanted with at least five commonly used defensive magic, which was extremely useful. It is an old buddy who has been with me for more than a hundred years. Is there a better enchanter here who can make a better product?

But in the face of women's invitations, you always have to give your fellow travelers a little face. I also thought it would be good to take the opportunity to see the skills of human enchanting masters. Rex, who had a little expectation, accepted the invitation happily.

But what happened afterwards was embarrassing.

On the busiest commercial street in Annington City, the lich's hoarse soul voice shouted, "It has no defensive effect other than luminescence and self-cleaning? What kind of garbage enchant is this! And that material, even spiritization and protection I don’t even have armor.” When everyone looked over in amazement, Caroline who came with her couldn’t wait to find a crack in the ground and chase in.

Caroline still didn't give up. So there are more things like this.

"Have you heard about the little sister-in-law of Aijiul? It's really interesting, she actually had a relationship with her uncle"

The turquoise soul fire is staring at him. Talking about gossip and romantic affairs with liches, this girl has a lot of brains.

"...the day after tomorrow there will be a charity fundraiser, well, I understand, let's go now, and don't disturb your research, Master."

The soul fire that has turned into blue has already explained everything, even Rex has been tossed enough, let the lich go to the orphanage to make a charity donation? Is this a special event for Halloween? What kind of cold joke is this.

I am not interested in talking about interpersonal communication, but I am very interested in how to turn the living into the dead.

Dirty jokes and gossip? Although in a certain sense this is indeed a killer weapon to break moral integrity and stalemate, don't you think it is also a kind of mockery for the Lich with only bones left.

Talk about the international situation and religious belief? Are you sure you want to shout "For the Light!" in front of the lich? Courting death is not how it came about. If you talk about the international situation... Rex's memory is still three centuries ago, I'm afraid you have to start with what kind of country the Bayer Empire is.

As the ultimate evolution of the otaku, even if the Lich plays the role of the classic villain in various legends, the plot is that a certain team broke into the castle/Lich's mage tower/laboratory/abandoned library, which is a typical example. This also explains from one aspect the ultimate characteristics of the liches. If they are killed, they will not go out, and if they die, they will stay in the house.

And in a sense, the youthful seventeen-year-old princess is a white, rich and beautiful person (a person who has enough real life and is very popular), hoping to use the way normal people communicate with the lich who is the embodiment of a dead house. , it is obviously difficult for some strongmen.

Of course, communication is not impossible, as long as you talk about something that the lich is interested in, the research house will often become very chatty, but if the lich is interested... ?”, “If you’re a zombie, which one is better, a tauren heart or a tiger heart?”, I’m afraid this girl can’t learn it no matter what.

"We have to look forward, every day there is a new sun... black history."

Caroline was constantly trying to increase her experience of shame. Later, even the Lich Rex couldn't bear it anymore. I'm afraid it won't be long before she will be punished by the top and turn her into a psychic. Zombies counting their fingers.

After the horror night last night, she gained a lot.

First, I met the little mage who shouted "Ah!" and then knocked the lich away with his staff. Later, he hijacked the lord with chicken legs, and smeared the death knight's face with pudding, creating chaos and escaping.

Caroline tried her best to maintain the situation, and kept scolding the idiot who dared to secretly laugh at the Lich, but after returning to her room, she still laughed for half the night, and now, she finally had to face the reality.

"The lich seems to live in the compartment. It is said that their perception is very keen... Could it be that I did something wrong again without knowing it? Ahhh, I don't want to get up!"

The only thing that made Caroline feel a little relieved was that the other party seemed to be well-bred. At least he didn't get so annoyed to put a finger of death on him.

The sun has risen. I'm afraid I have to face it today. He was still a lich with a damaged face and fell into a rage. If he made any jokes again, the blue-green soul fire might really detonate.

"Hey, I really don't want to go."

But I'm afraid I won't be able to go. The schedule of my party is very full. After this stop, I will go to the nearby Baron Matt's site soon. I must discuss today's schedule with the Lich. Start early.

But when Caroline finished dressing and opened the door, what she saw was a test of her sanity.

In the corridor, the mighty Lord Lich was broken into pieces. The little mage I saw yesterday was holding his skull, poured holy silver and holy water into it, and then wanted to shake it hard like a sieve. then. Also use the Lich's hand bone to reach in and stir.

How do you know it's a lich? The Lich's epic death tombstone robe is still on the body, and the familiar soul fire is about to be completely extinguished.

"Are you going to recruit or not? If you don't recruit, I will make your head into a chamber pot, um, it will be called Gul'dan... the head of Rex! Are you afraid!"

"Snapped!"

It must be the wrong way to open the door. Caroline slammed the door shut, and after a while, slowly opened it again.

But just when he stretched out his head, he found that the soul fire of Rex's skull and the blond mage were looking at him, as if thinking of something, the blond mage suddenly smiled.

"It seems that it doesn't matter even if you don't recruit, we have a better questioner."

Leaving Guldo... Rex's head behind, the blond young man picked up a rib casually and smiled at himself.

"Don't close the door, there is nothing wrong with the way you opened it. Well, be serious, don't laugh! We are robbing! Don't look down on other people's brother Lich's thigh bone, be careful I will give you a Lich's Touch."

"Don't worry, I'm not here to trouble you. I have a small plan that may help the current situation."

Time went back to midnight, in Cindy's temporary camp, when the young man in front of him said that he had a way to handle all this, everyone didn't quite believe it.

After all, the current situation is already obvious. The Vicky Chamber of Commerce learned from intelligence channels that the two countries have actually entered a state of war, which has exceeded the worst expectations.

"...What I originally considered was probably that I would encounter a certain lord who took too much kickbacks, or ran into an army of undead. Then, as long as there are guards to help, as long as you can escape, there is no problem. But now it is actually The war between the two countries..."

From the moment the Rags Kingdom declared war on the Bayer Empire, the Rags people in Bayer were in big trouble. Street vendors and little hairy kids with runny noses all regard you as a sworn enemy, which is probably not a good thing at all.

And the most troublesome thing is that the enemy you are facing is not an unorganized bandit, but a country's elite army, especially when the border guards of a powerful country, then just the national border becomes a natural moat.

He spread out the map casually, and pointed to the point to the south. That is the Asha Canyon we passed, and it is also the largest customs clearance place for the two countries. Of course, there is also the Haslevan Fortress of the Bayer Empire.

When we came here, we passed easily, and even picked up a black household with doubtful identities like me, that is, with a little bribe. dead end.

Opening one eye and closing one eye to collect some small money to let the unscrupulous merchants go away on weekdays is completely different from allowing foreign caravans to pass through during wartime. The former is an unspoken rule that everyone understands to make extra money, while the latter is mostly related to treason. After all, no one can guarantee whether there are spies and intelligence personnel in the caravan.

If we are still stupid enough to contact that garrison officer, I am afraid that he will be the first one to get us guillotined. After all, no matter how much gold you have, you have to die to enjoy it. The first person who wants to put us aside is probably him. myself.

"...It is absolutely impossible to turn back, but most other borders leading to 'enemy countries' are also like this. Of course, there are areas on the border that are not garrisoned, but those are mostly dangerous or extremely dangerous areas, such as the said I believe that you will not be foolish to gamble once in a fantasy forest where black fairies haunt. No. Depending on your configuration and strength, entering such a super-dangerous area is not even counted as gambling, it is definitely death."

No one answered, but judging by the awkward silence, and the plainly concealed surprise and murmurs of some people, I was probably right.

"Then, the remaining options are very simple. There are only two. They are nothing more than crossing the borders of other countries. Then find a way to return to Largos, or simply find a mountain village and grove to squat and see if the situation changes. And you can only choose the most negative latter."

Hearing this, Cindy couldn't hide her surprised expression anymore. The emergency had just happened, and she had just received the information. Before making a final decision, the other party had already seen through it.

"It's actually easy to guess, it's very simple. The former is more dangerous. If you want to go to the borders of other countries, you are equivalent to wandering in Bayer's country. At the moment when the Bayer Empire is in a state of war, all places They will definitely increase their vigilance. It is too risky to wander in the enemy's country without sufficient intelligence support. If they are blocked by an army, there is no possibility of survival. But if this road does not work , I’m afraid you won’t be able to return home in a short time.”

Everyone fell into a strange silence, looking at each other in blank dismay. Everyone could see this, but no one wanted to bring it up.

"...But have you ever thought of it? Find a place to squat and see how the situation changes. It seems safer, but in fact it is the most dangerous. As a super empire, do you believe that it has no control over its own land? The intelligence work of the Er Empire is well-known in all countries. You can hide, but how long can you hide? The most erroneous thing is that you still want to keep the goods at this time, and you dare to run away with the goods? Do you think that Samuel Will the lord let go of your piece of fat?"

Seeing that everyone was visibly shaken, I naturally struck while the iron was hot.

"No! Absolutely not! According to my understanding of the greedy nobleman, he will definitely rush up like a mad dog, swallow the goods himself, and then take our heads as spies to receive rewards. According to the current situation, even There is no need to contact the upper echelons of the empire and send professional spies, just follow the convoy’s wheel marks, maybe they are already on their way.”

I deliberately paused, and it was no surprise that everyone turned their attention to Cindy, and there was no need to hide their dissatisfaction and anger.

As a businessman, he insisted on fleeing with the goods, which already made the mercenaries very dissatisfied, but the rich are uncles, and the mercenaries are reluctant to disobey the orders of their employers and ruin their hard-earned reputation .

But no one is a fool, and this detail is not difficult to guess. Now it is too sudden, the time for flexible thinking is too short, and it is not well thought out. Even if I don't bring it up, after a while, someone will definitely figure it out.

At that time, the mercenary and the merchant will definitely have differences. Whether the merchant finally decides to abandon the goods, or the mercenary finally decides to help gamble on luck, there will definitely be conflicts between the two sides.

"...So, I said, if I have a way to allow you to successfully leave the Bayer Empire and keep the goods, will you listen to me?"

Memories end everywhere, and my smooth recruitment has been successful. After a little demonstration of strength, the mercenaries obeyed my command without hesitation, and our first step is to eliminate the immediate threat and start the counterattack directly.

I'm afraid Samuel would never have imagined that the businessman who was still chasing by him in the first half of the night would come back in the second half of the night.

"Epic-level magic robe? Oops, there are even 'steel skin' and 'dimension gate' added, little lich, you are not strong enough, and the equipment is not bad."

While trying to put on the robe, one adjusts the time-warping ring on the finger, from youth to adulthood, from adulthood to old age, from old age to...after death!

Yes, this ring can only change the appearance of the body's age, but it can't do anything inside. I am still a living person, but the appearance has turned into a corpse, and then the rotting flesh falls, and finally, I turned into a moving bone.

What surprised me a little was that the little girl looked at the horror movie-like scene of the living person turning into a dead person face to face. Not only did she not pee her pants in fright, but her face was full of excitement, as if she was very happy that she had finally found a big deal.

"Are you trying to pretend to be Lord Rex? Is it like the cross-dressing plot in the knight novel 'Two-Face'? But you don't have soul fire and death magic, so it's easy to be exposed."

"What a strange little girl. Come and see."

The highly condensed spiritual power was ignited in the eye sockets, and the turquoise soul fire blazed up, and the right hand with only the bones snapped its fingers, and countless skeletons appeared in the black mist.

I laughed. Surrounded by the power of death, the ice fluctuated between my fingers, and the lich floating in mid-air was roaring silently. My incarnation was already more like a grand lich than Rex himself .

"It's so interesting...it's too bad. Although I don't know how you did it, your makeup is perfect, and you can definitely get away with it. Then what are you going to do next? Threat me to follow your command and come to the next stage." Is it a huge scam? Let me tell you first, I don’t give in so easily, I don’t care about corporal punishment or anything, but as long as you threaten to treat my family badly, I will give in.”

I'm a little speechless, I mean torture is useless to you, is a few verbal threats enough, and you even take the initiative to tell me how to attack yourself, what kind of hostage are you?

"...Don't worry, we have a better choice. From today, she is Caroline. A, Milan."

A woman stepped out of the shadows. She also had the iconic light green hair of the Milan royal family. Looking at her face shape, she was 70% similar to Caroline herself!

"Even if you grow up like me, it won't work. I have the secret treasure of the royal family here, which was given to me by His Majesty the Emperor. Only the blood of the Milan royal family can make it shine... Huh? How is it better than when I held it?" It's still bright!"

The pearl necklace that was taken away by that woman was emitting a dazzling brilliance, as if it had encountered the artifact of the real owner, but Lilith Milan carefully put the necklace back on her neck, and the brilliance of the pearl gradually diminished.

"...If you don't complete the hijacking process, don't threaten or lure me, I will definitely not tell you the information you want!"

When I was sure again that this woman probably had some brain problems, Lilith showed a dangerous smile full of evil charm, and she even got closer.

"Don't worry, you will tell..."

Those slender fingers had already begun to untie Caroline's sleeves, and the red lips and sweet tongue had reached the back of the other's neck and neck, while the other hand had already slipped to a more dangerous position.

"You, you, what are you doing!! This is completely different from the novel, molesting! You can change people..."

"Aren't I asking you? Asking about your body... Well, it's good, it's unexpected. It's really a treasure, my lord. Although I don't care if you watch me eat, and I don't mind if you are interested in joining, but Are you not worried that Lady Heloise will report to Lady Eliza?"

Well, I was a bit regretful, I almost asked "I can really join", and when I was stared at by "You are in the way", I knew that this "invitation" was just "to tease you".

Although it's a pity that I can't see a good show, I can only leave with Rex's head helplessly. I'm afraid it will be hard to forget the itchy moans behind.

"Hmph, women have their own way of communication, let's have some communication that belongs to the lich... such as soul torture, soul search, psychological shock." (to be continued...)

ps: Well, it’s almost the end of the month, let’s have the support of a monthly pass ()