The Experimental Log of the Crazy Lich

"Sure enough, you can't trust the attractive ads on the street at all."

At dawn the next day, I met Pastor Betty and her little friends at yesterday’s restaurant, but as a senior ex-adventurer, after just a quick glance, I realized that this team was definitely not right because of the name .

No, it doesn't take an experienced adventurer to see that something is wrong with this team, and it's no wonder they asked Priest Betty to pull people in. The others are completely unreliable!

Among the four friends, the most familiar one is the barbarian I met in the restaurant yesterday... a thief!

He is about 2.34 meters tall, his wrists are thicker than my thighs, his leather armor has been shattered by his muscles, his face is so ruthless that he can kill people with his face, he is born with a strong racial talent, madness and strength far beyond ordinary people A barbarian can be employed as a berserker without any difficulty, but when this girl met, she said something awkwardly.

"Violence is bad, so I haven't been a big brother for many years, and now I, Agen, am a tech thief."

Tech thief? You tell me you're a barbarian tech thief? Your god of war will be mad at you to death!

Of course I know what technical thieves are. Those guys are thieves who specialize in relic exploration, traps, mechanism cracking, and stealing. Their most important attributes are not the agility and strength of conventional thieves, but cracking mechanisms, traps, mastering The intelligence of related knowledge and skills is a job that a fool can't do, and because all the time and energy are devoted to the mastery of skills, the combat power of five is higher, basically zero.

But since this profession does not require combat ability, it is the patent of dwarf adventurers who are naturally lacking in strength and have dirty hands and feet. Their smaller size would have been able to avoid some of the traps for normal people. Coupled with agility and a head with a natural intelligence bonus. Simply the most perfect tech thief.

And if I remember correctly, the barbarian's racial talent has a bonus to strength, but a penalty to intelligence. Once berserk, intelligence will drop to about 3 directly, just like a beast, even a complete sentence There are difficulties.

With outstanding natural strength, if he took up the job of an assassin who specializes in combat. I can only say "a more alternative choice", but this guy actually took the job of the most intelligent tech thief. I can only say that this guy is basically a scam.

"... Grace, I'm a paladin now, it's too bad for my image to yell and spit casually."

While trying to suppress the desire to complain in his heart, he smiled and nodded.

"May the Light bless you, friend."

And that huge body suddenly embraced him,

Dou Da's tears couldn't stop dripping, and they all wet my vest.

"You...you are the first one who didn't laugh at me!"

"Brother barbarian, everyone has the right to choose their own path. How could I laugh at you?"

"You, you are Agen's brother from today. Those who laugh at Agen deserve to be beaten by Agen!"

Seeing that Agen didn't beat up the new partner, the faces of the friends around him were not happy, but undisguisedly disappointed. It was obvious that they were all planning to watch the fun. What kind of people are these people!

And the second person who came to introduce me was the female pastor I met yesterday. She looked normal.

"I'm Betty Wenlace, you can also call me Betty, I'm a boy."

Well, the most normal in an instant becomes the most abnormal...

"I'm a paladin, I'm a paladin, I'm a paladin. The first priority of a paladin—the head can be broken, the blood can flow, the hairstyle...the smile can't be messed up!"

He kept chanting the mantra of calmness in his heart, but his expression froze for a moment, then he returned to a standard professional smile, and stretched out his right arm to him.

"Mr. Brady, nice to see you again."

"Wow! This guy can still keep smiling! Just like what Betty said, he has a super realistic fake smile on his face. It is said that the power of a paladin is proportional to his fake smile ability, even knowing that Betty's sister is a man can keep smiling, Isn't this amazing?!"

"I heard it all, bastard!"

The veins on his forehead were already popping out, but he silently said "I didn't hear it, I didn't hear it", and continued to smile at this wonderful team.

And the little girl who was still laughing at me just now is probably one of the few normal people in this team, with a thick five-short figure, a simple face, a small flying weight around her waist, a deep voice, and a long golden ponytail that almost drags to the ground. On the ground, this is the special dwarf aunt in the Alaidon Mountains area... a girl!

Dwarves are not uncommon in this world. There are gray dwarves underground, mountain dwarves and shield dwarves in the mountains. Although they are not tall, they have enough vigor (strength bonus) and strong body (physical strength bonus). Soldiers, miners, sons of the earth are bold and forthright, born warriors.

Of course, there are advantages and disadvantages. Dwarves generally have short feet and unresponsiveness. It is impossible to expect them to bounce like elves, but dwarf shield defenders are world-renowned excellent defenders. There is such a dwarf in the world. If it is, the team doesn't have to worry about the lack of meat shields at all.

"Hello, Brother Paladin, I'm Mary, Longbowman Mary."

While speaking, the female dwarf pointed to the iron and wood longbow behind her straightforwardly.

Well, should we take it for granted? Sure enough, there are no normal people in this team. A dwarf will become an elf professional longbowman. Your mountain blood is crying!

"Nice to meet you, Miss Mary."

"No, I'm Mrs. Mary. I'm married and have two sons. My man is too disappointing, so let him take care of the children at home, and I will work to earn money."

"Pfft, it's really a dwarf aunt!"

Looking at this "square and square" face, I don't know what to say.

There is a saying that the only difference between a male dwarf and a female dwarf is that the voice of a male dwarf is sharper. Well, you read that right, the voice of a male dwarf is sharper. This is mainly due to the spoken language of the dwarves. , as soon as the words came out, everyone was shocked. The echoes kept coming.

And look at the words. Female dwarves also grow beards. Male dwarfs also like to wear braids. It is difficult for outsiders to distinguish between men and women, and their aesthetics are also very strange. I just can’t figure out what is so charming about the charming bucket waist and bushy beard of the dwarf girl in my hometown.

Due to different aesthetics, it is difficult for outsiders to distinguish between men and women and ages, but generally the dwarves who come out to take risks are "young people" in their seventies and eighties, so I also think she is a "girl", but since this Aunt Mary said that she has Two children were born. According to the age of one hundred and twenty dwarves, this one is estimated to be over two hundred years old.

Well, there are already three wonderful teammates, and I am already numb. The last teammate is a handsome elf. The fancy leather armor and the shamisen on the back show his identity. He is a handsome elf. travelling poet.

"Hi, I'm Soronor."

Yes, etiquette is normal. The appearance is normal, and the name is normal. The occupation is also normal, but inexplicably, my gentleman's detective instinct tells me that the person in front of me is definitely not a normal person, but the cold vest reminds me that I am in a crisis.

"...Sure enough, Solo has taken a fancy to the other party."

"Brother Soronor is good at everything. With this hobby, several soldiers were scared away...but that's not the case, and we can't become sisters."

The sharp five senses allowed me to hear the discussion, and this time, the smiling face was finally shattered.

"Me, me, you, are you gay?"

"...Please don't say it so harshly, I just like handsome young men."

While talking, the handshake turned into a sneaky squeeze. Immediately, my skin got goosebumps.

"Damn, what kind of monsters and ghosts, don't let go! Eat my broken shoes!"

Well, the first meeting, it ended up being a full blown fight, and I was out of breath after stomping on the fags.

"Should Klos be in the church here? It seems that I need some healing smiles."

Inexplicably, I feel that if there is that wild elf's smile, my mood will be much better.

"Pfft, I was disgusted by a gay guy, so I went to find a fake mother to heal? You can't be saved."

The dead cat's ridicule came as expected, but I lost all the strength to fight her. Who are these people? I'm afraid there is no more wonderful adventurer team in the entire dream forest. Is my luck so bad? ?

"Dead cat, meow a cute one."

"Meow, master, I want to drink milk. I want white, cloudy, fishy milk."

Well, the dead cat instantly turned into a young blonde cat girl, with yellow cat ears, a tail, and a fluffy ball glove. She deliberately said it was sexy and sweet, and licked her lips while talking She looked at me with winking eyes, as if she was very hungry, and in an instant, I stood up... well, all the goosebumps stood up.

"Go, it's you, Heloise, and turn into a shooting star in the sky.

Immediately, force it to turn into a dead cat, then step on the ground vigorously, throw a standard javelin, throw it into the air, and turn it into a shooting star.

"Dead wood deserves to be masturbated forever, meow, what a disgusting feeling..."

I turned back panting, only to find that my friends were talking about it.

"He actually turned his pet into a woman, and had sex with his pet. The difficulty is that it is said that the sad life in the legend... the sad thing."

"Sad Wind! It's the legendary pervert!"

It seems that any adventurer will know him, Beifeng has really realized his life pursuit, he is famous, he is famous!

"Don't worry, even if you are sad (it has become an adjective), we will not discriminate against you. Everyone has the right to choose their lover."

Speaking words of understanding, Soronor nodded sincerely.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

At this moment, I really seriously considered the possibility of returning to Styx and starting all over again.

"To be honest, we can rest assured that you are obviously suitable for our team. Normal people won't stay here for long!"

Betty's words made everyone nod their heads, but I wanted to cry but had no tears.

"I'm obviously a normal person!"

【King of Gentlemen...】

"Shut up!"

---------------

Now that the preliminary introduction has been completed, according to the unspoken rules of the adventurers and his party, the next step is to find a simple task to sharpen and cooperate. The actual combat is more convincing than any words.

The big action of the wood spirits is scheduled for three days later, and it does not affect the simple hunting tasks. We randomly accepted a task of "one hundred ghoul fangs" in the guild, and we took a black carriage with two silver coins for one kilometer and walked out. The Forest of Dreams.

Ghouls are just slightly more advanced corpse-type undead than zombies. They look like thinner and uglier short zombies. They are not strong but quite agile. There is corpse poison on their teeth and claws. If they accidentally die on them In the hand, there is a high probability that it will also turn into another ghoul.

Corpse-type undead can use other corpses to strengthen themselves. The names of ghouls can tell part of their habits. These guys are extremely aggressive, have good noses, and are good at ambushes and sneak attacks.

The six undead planes are all open. These bloodthirsty guys smell the breath of living people, and there are quite a few coming over. Ghouls are not uncommon around the Forest of Dreams.

Soon, we found a group of ghouls on a hill. It seemed that there were about a dozen of them, and the strongest seemed to be a ghoul king.

I have already asked clearly, the personal strength of this strange team is not bad, they are all above the silver level, ordinary ghouls can be handled by a bronze-level fighter, and the ghoul king is only at the top level of silver, so it should not be difficult.

"For the Holy Light!"

In order to behave like a standard paladin who hates the undead as much as possible, and save my image, I let out the usual battle cry, and then took the lead in the charge.

Then, I came back even faster...

At that moment, I knew why this team couldn't recruit meat shields.

Soronor and "Betty" are both support personnel standing in the back row, that is to say, playing soy sauce. As a longbowman, Mary will not stand in the front line. Tech thieves are not allowed to participate in the battle according to the unspoken rules of adventurers. , that is, I am the only one who charges.

Although the fangs and claws of the ghoul are poisonous, how can I be afraid when I hold up the epic shield "The Wall of Sighs of Urmdillokan", it is my teammates who make me turn around and run away!

"You were sent by the other side to play with me! Didn't your last teammate really get killed by you?"

Longbowman Mary's longbow is specially made of iron wood. This kind of tree native to the Hengduan Mountains is as hard as iron. The wooden sword made can be used as a real sword, but if it is used to make a bow, it is not something ordinary people can pull. moveable.

But Mary is a century-old dwarf warrior, and her brute strength is definitely not inferior to that of a professional warrior. The bow and arrow that should have been erratic and quick turned into a heavy cannon that "Boom!" "Boom!" It is the god of death that may come at any time. If I just lowered my head and slowed down a bit, I am afraid that I will be bald now.

On the other side, the Ghoul King has already gotten into a fight with our "Technical Thief" Agen.

Tech thieves can't fight? Have you ever seen a tech thief with a giant sword? Have you ever seen a technical thief who slashed the flesh and blood of the ghoul king? That girl has gone berserk!

Judging from the muscles that have grown a circle and the pupils that rolled their eyes, this is still an advanced "complete madness", that is to say, while her strength is skyrocketing, she is also transformed into a painless and rational killing machine. The ghoul king was torn apart by him with only the upper body left. Judging from the drooling eyes staring at me, I was regarded by him as the biggest threat!

"Run, brother Roland! Agen is dizzy with blood, and when he sees blood, he will instinctively go mad, and his relatives will not recognize him!"

Well, I figured out why this guy didn't become a soldier. Complete madness is the last trump card. He can't control himself. Doesn't it mean that as long as he goes to the battlefield, he will kill both the enemy and himself!

"You professional cheaters, cheat me!" (To be continued...) ()