"I'm looking far away..."

The music became louder and louder, Gao Xian slowly opened his eyes, and he casually pressed the power button on his phone, and the music stopped.

Gao Xian turned off the alarm, but he always felt that something was wrong. He took the phone and looked at it. The time was clearly displayed on the screen: eight o'clock.

The date was marked below: Wednesday, August 9. The seventh day of the seventh month of the lunar calendar.

Everything was normal, and there was nothing wrong.

For some reason, Gao Xian felt that everything in front of him seemed familiar.

It was as if all this had happened before, but he couldn't remember what it was like afterwards.

This feeling of déjà vu had appeared several times in Gao Xian's life, but this feeling was always fleeting.

He couldn't catch anything, and in the end he could only forget these wonderful feelings with a sense of loss.

Sometimes Gao Xian would also think that if he had this moment when buying lottery tickets, he could change his life.

Otherwise, this feeling was meaningless. It will only make him doubt the reality of life, and doubt whether he lives in a huge virtual game or is an insignificant NPC.

He can be full of imagination about the origin of the world, but he must submit to the most real material law of the world: if he doesn't eat, he will be hungry.

The real pressure of survival is enough to crush all romantic and aesthetic fantasies, and can also crush all kinds of dreams and hopes.

Gao Xian is almost forty years old and has long given up these messy ideas. Based on materialistic dialectics, he found a way to explain this familiar trance feeling.

That is, the mixture of people's short-term memory and long-term memory will cause slight confusion in people's consciousness.

Therefore, people will regard everything they see in front of them as part of long-term memory.

Gao Xian thinks this explanation is very reasonable and scientific. At least it is better than the gods and ghosts, and better than the messy mysticism.

He prefers clear and reasonable logic and doesn't like to talk nonsense.

For example, bats symbolize good fortune because bats and good fortune have the same pronunciation. This kind of homophonic pun is unbearable for him, which is simply challenging his IQ bottom line.

No matter how he claims to be rational, Gao Xian will never explain the truth to those who believe in these things. It is meaningless.

Maybe there is a connection between the two. Who can say for sure... It is none of his business whether others are willing to believe it or not, and it is irrelevant whether he believes it or not.

Gao Xian just sat up, and all kinds of messy thoughts popped up in his mind, one after another. It is not quite accurate to say that it is a wild horse that has run away. It should be a group of wild monkeys, jumping up and down and chirping, which makes people irritated...

Gao Xian glanced at the bedside table, where a stack of tissues had been pulled out for use, and there was a tablet on the other side of the pillow.

He took it and opened it, and it was indeed a paused movie.

He suddenly realized that it was no wonder that he felt so empty. But he felt something was wrong, he hadn't used any tissues...

Sitting there thinking for a long time, Gao Xian couldn't remember what he did last night. He could only be sure that he didn't drink, because he didn't have a headache without alcohol.

It was not until he was uncomfortable with holding his urine that Gao Xian hurried to the bathroom to take care of his personal hygiene.

After washing his face hastily and wiping it with a slightly black white towel, Gao Xian looked at himself in the mirror carefully.

His hair was a little long and messy, and you could see that it was a little curved after being permed and dyed.

His face was a little pale, his eye bags were a little big and dark, and his skin had a lot of debris. I don't know if it was because of dryness or something.

Overall, he looked decent, but he looked obviously depressed. Anyone could tell at a glance that he was a tired middle-aged office worker who was not living a good life.

His belly was a little big, and he looked even greasy.

Gao Xian didn't know why, the more he looked at the person in the mirror, the more he disliked him. He even had a strong suspicion: Is this really me? So depressed and decadent, and so ugly!

I always felt that something was wrong!

Gao Xian didn't want to go to work at all. He felt that he needed to think about life.

But he didn't want to take leave, because he would be deducted money for taking leave. Besides, he could still think about life in the company, although it was a little noisy.

He went downstairs and ate two buns and a bowl of soy milk on the street for eight yuan.

Turn left after leaving the community and you will find the company. We rented a shop on the first floor and set up more than 20 workstations, mainly working as a real estate agent.

This job is highly mobile and unstable. Gao Xian has only been here for a few months. His salary is extremely low, but fortunately the work intensity is not high, and he can just make a few phone calls for a day.

As the oldest salesperson in the company, a group of young people are not willing to pay attention to Gao Xian.

Gao Xian sat at his workstation in the corner, staring at the broken computer screen for a day.

At 8 o'clock in the evening, someone suggested eating skewers, and Gao Xian followed and had a full meal, spending 42 yuan.

After drinking two glasses of beer, Gao Xian was a little drunk. When the elevator stopped on the 20th floor, he suddenly wanted to go to the rooftop to take a look.

He has rented here for a few months, but he has not been to the rooftop.

In fact, no matter where he rents, he has never been to the rooftop.

Daily work consumes most of his energy and wipes out all his curiosity and desire to explore. Looking back, there is nothing to say except that he has saved some money in the bank.

Gao Xian didn't know why he had this idea, but he just wanted to go and take a look.

When he got to the rooftop, he found it was pitch black.

There were ropes tied to the vents, probably for drying clothes, and they almost strangled his neck.

This little accident made Gao Xian laugh and at the same time he lost interest in the rooftop.

Even though he was here, Gao Xian still came to the wall and took a look. For safety reasons, there are parapets one and a half meters high on all sides of the rooftop.

Gao Xian is more than 80 meters tall and can easily see the scenery outside.

After ten o'clock in the evening, it is the most lively and prosperous time in the city. The streets are filled with constant traffic, the buildings are brightly lit, and the noise reaches the rooftop, making the dark rooftop seem even quieter.

After watching it for a while, Gao Xian felt increasingly uncomfortable. He couldn't explain why, but he just felt lonely and out of tune with the bustling city around him.

This kind of loneliness is difficult to express, and Gao Xian has no one to talk to. He looked at the twenty centimeter wide parapet and suddenly had an impulse to stand up and take a look.

Gao Xian pushed against the wall and jumped up half of his body, but he didn't dare to go up any further. He was dizzy looking at the brightly lit streets below.

The real fear also suppressed the little emotions that were tumbling in his heart.

Just as Gao Xian was thinking about coming down, he heard someone from behind yelling, "Hey, hey, don't jump!"

The man shouted in a panic, but his voice was very sweet.

After Gao Xian came down, he turned around and saw a young woman in cool clothes. He couldn't see clearly what she looked like. In the dimness, he could only see her white thighs.

"Uncle, there is no obstacle in the world that cannot be overcome."

The young woman wanted to comfort Gao Xian, but she couldn't think of anything to say for a moment. She stuttered and said, "As the saying goes, it is better to live than to die."

Gao Xian was a little funny: "It's okay, I didn't want to jump off the building."

Seeing that Gao Xian's mood was quite stable, the young woman breathed a sigh of relief: "That's good. I'm so scared..."

Gao Xian suddenly realized that the young woman was afraid that he would fall to death and turn into a ghost, so she just said so directly, okay?

He thought this woman was quite interesting, so he asked casually: "What are you doing on the rooftop so late?"

The woman patted her back and carried the guitar: "The room is not soundproof, so I came up to practice singing."

"oh oh."

Gao Xian waved his hand: "You are busy, I will go down first."

When he arrived at the door, he couldn't help but turn around and take a look. He saw the woman turn on a fill light, turn on the stand and put the phone away. She played with the strings and said, "Brothers, I just met a wall-climbing guy." Uncle, I thought he was going to jump off the building, I almost peed in fear..."

Under the light, the woman has beautiful features, fresh short hair, shorts and long legs, and is wearing personal flip-flops. Her voice was soft but seemed very relaxed and casual.

The woman's guitar is average and her singing is average. She is full of energy and relaxed, which is quite charming.

Gao Xian watched at the door for a while and felt that he was in a much better mood. When he returned to his room, he wanted to watch a movie to relieve his loneliness, but then he felt a little wretched, so he just went to sleep... (End of Chapter)

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