The Monster I Was Redeemed

The next day, An Sien took the check to the bank to cash it.

Looking at the balance in the text message on the mobile phone, she let go of her dangling heart.

For the past few months, An Sien was like a race against a wolf in stone shackles.

The pressure at work and the hot pursuit of medical expenses made her breathless.

This cheque for 150,000 yuan was a key to her, a key that could help her untangle the shackles and smash the wolf to death with shackles.

An Sien looked up at the sky, she had never felt so comfortable before.

It felt like being locked in a closet for three full hours, and the moment I opened the closet, I came to an endless prairie.

But...for some unknown reason, she was in a good mood, but she couldn't be happy at all.

An Sien shook his head, forcibly cheered up, and boarded the bus to the hospital.

Qianhua General Hospital.

An Sien's mother lives here.

However, she does not live in the intensive care unit or inpatient unit, but in a separate building on the edge of the hospital.

Almost every few days here, several doctors come out pushing carts covered with white cloths.

Hospice Department.

This is a special inpatient building specially set up by the hospital for the terminally ill patients in the weeks or even months before they are about to die.

Most of them are patients with advanced malignant tumors, and a few other terminally ill patients.

The people who stayed here were basically sentenced to death in medicine, and there was no cure. They could only watch the god of death come step by step.

The main difference between this and the inpatient department is that there will be professional nurses who will take care of the patient carefully to relieve the pain, and will use the method of psychological counseling to relieve the patient's fear, anxiety, anxiety and other emotions.

There are also professional nutritionists in terms of diet, which can satisfy the appetite of patients to a certain extent.

If the patient still has a sense of taste.

The hospice department is well-equipped and well-staffed,

But it's rarely full.

Because the cost here is too expensive, you have to pay about 20,000 to 30,000 hospitalization fees every month.

And the family members of patients who treat patients with advanced cancer, if they are willing to treat them, even if they invade the family and property, they will have to cure them to the end, and win the illusory miracle.

Most people who are willing to accept the consequences of death and want to spend the last part of their lives will choose to go home.

Only those who are not free or in the mood to take care of their families come here.

After paying the monthly fee at the front desk, An Sien took the elevator to the third floor.

In everyone's imagination, this kind of building full of terminally ill patients must be lifeless, and the air is almost frozen.

However, the environment here is actually more lively than the ordinary inpatient department.

When passing through some open rooms, there were still laughter coming from inside, and even in some of the doors that were hidden, there were vague words such as "three generations one", "bomb" and "touch".

There is a cheerful atmosphere inside and outside the corridor, and it is completely impossible to see that this is a gathering place for a group of dying people.

An Sien came to the end of the corridor, stood at the door of the ward and took out a mirror to adjust his expression.

After waiting for a youthful smile on the face of the person in the mirror, she took a deep breath and gently opened the door and walked in.

The moment the door was closed, all noise was shut out.

The nurse who was cleaning the room saw An Sien calling to the side: "Aunt An, your Sien is here."

An Sien smiled and thanked the nurse.

She came to the hospital bed and sat down and called, "Mom."

There was a thin woman with dry skin lying on the bed. At this time, she was taking a nap with her eyes closed and there were tears in the corners of her eyes, as if she had not woken up.

Hearing An Sien's call, she opened her eyes with difficulty: "Why are you here again? It's not good to ask for leave every three days at the company just after going to work."

An Sien said with a smile, "It's okay, I'm not a normal 9-to-5 job, I can go wherever I want when I don't have a role to play, everyone is like this."

Of course, it was impossible for An Sien to tell her mother about her real job, so she lied that she was recommended by her mentor to be a female supporting role in a film and television company.

Because there are more roles, the salary is also very impressive.

At first, An Sien used various reasons to persuade her mother to be hospitalized.

For example, there is no one to take care of me at ordinary times. If something goes wrong, it is too late to go to the hospital. No matter what I say, my mother would not agree to come to such a ward that costs tens of thousands of people a month.

Even once refused to cooperate with the treatment.

It wasn't until An Sien turned her face that her career was on the rise, and the death of someone in the family would have a bad impact, and her mother agreed to come here to spend the last time of her life.

An Ma's skinny palm rested on the back of An Sien's hand, and her tone was very slow: "Have a good rest when you have time, don't always run to me."

An Ma's voice was very soft, like a dandelion scattered by the wind.

She also wanted to be so angry that her daughter should not worry, but the powerlessness of her body prevented her from raising her voice, so that she became weak when speaking.

"I didn't wake up until noon from last night, don't worry about me."

An Sien smiled and wiped away the tears from her mother's pathology.

An Ma smiled and scolded with a tired face: "Who cares about you girl, I just don't want you to always disturb my sleep."

"Who used to complain that I didn't go home during the summer vacation."

An Sien unceremoniously took his mother's message.

Ma An said sternly: "You are a teenage girl going out to work, can I not worry?"

"Isn't it a girl now?"

An Sien gently picked up her mother's palm and placed it on top of her head to act like a spoiled child.

An Ma gently stroked An Sien's head: "Okay, you're all grown up and still like a child."

An Sien smiled without excuse.

The mother and daughter chatted like this for a while, and Ma An's spirit gradually improved, but when it was almost time for dinner, Ma An began to drive people away.

"Aren't I still alive and well, go back quickly if you have nothing to do, don't always rely on me."

"It's been a long time since we ate together, why don't you..."

An Sien originally wanted to stay and have a meal, but the other party insisted on driving her away: "It's better not to, the meals here are all fixed and rationed, so why don't you have your share, go home quickly."

An Ma reprimanded An Sien: "Also, even if the company doesn't arrange work, can't you go and help out, do you know how to leave a good impression on others?

You just joined the job not long ago. If you don't have a good relationship with the crew now, you will see what you will do after the filming is over and there will be no income. "

"Okay, I know, I'll stop disturbing your rest in the future."

An Sien muttered with the bag on his back, "Next time, come over and tell the nutritionist in advance, and ask him to prepare one for me as well."

After saying that, she turned and left.

As if colluding, not long after An Sien left the ward, the nurse pushed a small cart into the ward.

On the cart was today's lunch: a bowl of simmered lean meat porridge, a plate of fish with the bones removed, a cup of soy milk, and a thinly sliced ​​apple.

"Aunt An, you have a really good relationship with your daughter. She is the one who visits her family most frequently."

The nurse carefully helped An Ma up, and then pressed the switch on the head of the bed to slowly raise the pillow.

"I don't want her to come here."

After An Sien left, Ma An returned to her powerless state.

She picked up the spoon and wanted to scoop a spoonful of porridge, but after a moment of shaking in her right hand, the spoon slipped from her fingers and fell on the folding table.

She tried again, with the same result.

The nurse stood by and looked at this stubborn woman: "I'll feed you."

This time, she didn't refuse, but asked a question as the nurse picked up the bowl: "How long can I live?"

"...According to the general examination at the time of admission, the cancer cells have spread from the lungs to the brain, which is the main reason why your body is becoming more and more numb. As for the remaining life... There is less than a month left."

In stage four cancer, cancer cells are transferred from the lungs to the brain, the most common way of metastasis.

Facing the nurse's answer, An Ma's expression was as usual.

Concealing the condition from the patient is to keep the patient from worrying, but these apply to curable diseases.

They have entered the hospice department, and they are surrounded by dying people. Even if their hearts are big, they can realize that their time is short.

What the doctors and nurses here do is to ease the fear and anxiety of the patients.

People who come here will be told about how much life they have left. The main responsibility of the hospice department is to enlighten these patients, so that they will not have psychological pressure and face death bravely.

Therefore, they will not hide the remaining lifespan of the patient, but will try their best to let the patient leave with joy in the final journey of life.

"You didn't tell Si En, did you?" Ma An asked.

"No."

The nurse shook his head.

Usually doctors help family members hide the patient's condition, but in hospice, the reverse may also occur.

Some patients do not want their family members to miss them too much and deliberately conceal their illness.

Everything here is based on the will of the patient. If the patient wants to conceal their physical condition, they will try their best to help conceal it.

As long as the family members do not take the initiative to ask, they will notify the family members to come and see the patient for the last time when there is about a week left in the estimated life expectancy.

"Then... can I inform Sien the day before I'm about to die?"

"We can't do this. One week is the limit we can predict. In the last week, the condition may deteriorate sharply at any time. It is very likely that Miss An will not come over to see you for the last time."

The nurse refused An Ma's request.

Maybe someone can survive for half a year after being sentenced to death, but there are also cases where the doctor said that he could live for three months, and his condition suddenly deteriorated and died on the same day.

While feeding Mother An, the nurse gave her advice: "There are a lot of things that can only be said when we part right away. If you have more time, you can also think about what else you have to say."

"I'll help you to visit other wards in the future. It's not good for your health to stay in the room alone. It's better to play cards and chat with other patients."

"Thank you, no, I'm not afraid of death."

An Ma's expression was desolate: "It's only less than a month... I just can't let go of Sien..."

The nurse comforted: "Don't worry, Miss An has grown up and has a high-paying job. She will live happily in the future."

An Ma shook her head and looked out the window, her expression a little desolate: "That's why I can't let her go."

"Si En has always been good at concealing her emotions, but... I am her mother, how could I not see her state... She should be forcing herself again..."

"You can grow up only through setbacks, and Miss An looks like the kind of person who grows stronger with more setbacks. You can't always look at her with the eyes of the past, but you have to have confidence in your daughter."

The nurse picked up a piece of fish and brought it to An Ma's mouth.

She looked at the lunch on the folding table in front of her and said nothing.

…………

After An Sien left the hospice department, the smile on his face began to fade slowly.

When he walked out of the hospital, he regained his expressionless expression.

Looking at his shadow on the window, An Sien couldn't understand why he just couldn't be happy?

Obviously my mother's medical expenses have been settled, obviously I don't have to pick up the guests, and I can leave the devil's lair in a short time, why can't I be happy?

An Sien couldn't understand for a while.

She walked to the shopping street. She didn't come here to buy anything, she was just wandering aimlessly.

Along the way, An Sien stopped and went until the milk tea in the hands of two seventeen or eighteen-year-old girls caught her attention.

I seem to have never had milk tea after graduation...

An Sien fell into memory.

After learning that her mother was suffering from lung cancer, she applied to her tutor for an early graduation and started a part-time job journey.

She knows very well that she will not be able to earn medical expenses if she goes to a regular company to apply for a job for a while, so she has been developing in the part-time industry, and her first job is selling milk tea.

Selling milk tea during the day and picking up couriers at night, just working day and night, barely enough to cover the cost of a course of treatment.

As the saying goes, the person who is covered in Luo Qi is not a silkworm breeder. After selling milk tea for so long, An Sien himself did not drink a cup in order to save money.

Driven by an inexplicable consciousness, An Sien walked in the direction where the two girls came.

Not long after, she found a milk tea shop and bought a cup of bubble milk tea after a long absence.

An Sien held the milk tea in both hands, and there was always an unknown emotion surging in his heart.

She came to a park where there was no one and sat down, sipping milk tea in small sips, but as she drank, tears flowed down.

When he drank the first sip of milk tea, An Sien understood the real reason for his sadness.

She was crying for what happened to her.

Originally, An Sien was still hesitating whether to sell her body to make money, but the tattooed man's actions made her shattered and completely sunk.

The week-long "training" before picking up the guests completely killed An Sien and turned her into a numb marionette.

For the past half month, she obliterated herself, mechanically speaking to the guests according to the trainer's request, repeating those provocative actions.

Those who have seen the light have a hard time enduring the darkness.

When she was in hell, she was surrounded by tragedies. An Sien had no special thoughts, but when she jumped out of hell and looked back, the pain in her heart was awakened.

An Sien choked, chewing the pearls in the milk tea.