Touch of Flame

91 Tough day

Priest Chanan's words left her with deep thoughts and an unfamiliar feeling in her chest. She was guilty? Her eyes became wet as she recalled that day when she lost her whole family coming back home all alone. Why her? She had expected death. She knew the dangerous worlds she lived in, she would die sooner than later, but she thought she would die with her family. Not be left alone. She would share their absence. Their pain.

Ravina tried to swallow the large lump in her throat but it was painful and it only got bigger. Heavier. It was alright to be happy? How? For her to be happy she would have to be selfish. She would have to abandon this mission, run away and find Ares. Live happy with him even if it was for a few days. She would have to ignore finding her sister or saving her people.

A tear fell down her cheek. The priest told her that it was alright to be selfish. That she had a right to be happy. Well, even when destiny made her a dragon tamer then her path was clear. She would have to sacrifice some things in order to gain other things.

She lay down in bed curled up. She couldn't be selfish when she was already ungrateful. She was here fed and clothed, while her sister… god knew what she was going through. She would have to remain strong even if she just wanted to rest. Escape. She was tired. The tears streamed down her face. As she cried she half slept.

In the background, she could hear a knock on the door to her room. She ignored it, continuing her shallow slumber. The door opened and footsteps came near her bed.

"Ravina?" It was Malachi.

She ignored him, keeping her eyes shut, and turned away.

"I know you can hear me," he said. "It is time for lunch."

She didn't reply. She wasn't hungry anyway.

"Stop acting like a child and come eat. I won't beg you."

Ravina shut her eyes tightly as if that would make him disappear and she could be left alone. All alone. In her desperation for him to disappear, he did.

He came in the evening again, asking her things she couldn't follow, but dinner was involved. When he got no reaction, he left again. That night she had nightmares again. It was mostly her mother this time. Her corpse was barely unrecognizable. She could not even touch her or hug her to cry out her grief.

In the cold morning, she woke up shaking. Her skin was damp. She reached for the covers to warm herself for while as she heard a rooster crowing outside. She took a moment to calm down in bed before getting up. Her whole body ached from sleeping for too long, yet she didn't feel rested. Her head throbbed and her throat was dry.

She went to the private room and washed up, splashing the cool water over her face, and then used a wet cloth to clean her skin. She picked some new clothes, minty green, and looked at the tattoo on her waist as she dressed.

A dandelion? Healing?

She looked at her hands. She had picked at her fingertips again. Perhaps it was time to use some healing balm. Let's see how this healing would go. How long would it take for her hands to look decent again? She doubted it would be anytime soon. The scars were deep. Some were perhaps even permanent after she had reopened them many times.

After combing her hair, she went to the kitchen to make breakfast. She brewed coffee and made scrambled eggs.

"I see you have finally left your room?"

Ravina lifted her gaze and found Malachi standing at the entrance, leaning against the wall.

"Good morning," she said and continued with her work.

He came inside and sat at the table. He was quiet for a moment before he spoke, "what happened yesterday?"

"Nothing. I was just tired." She replied.

She served the eggs, cheese, and olives. She put bread in a basket before placing it on the table as well.

"Would you like tea or coffee?" She asked.

"Anything will do."

She poured him coffee and served him the cup, before sitting down as well. He watched her in silence the whole time but she couldn't care. She was in pain.

Picking up her cup she took a sip of her coffee.

"Did you like the tattoo?" He asked.

"Yes. It was beautiful. You are truly talented."

He frowned. He probably didn't believe her.

"Do you know what a dandelion means?" She asked.

"No." He said chewing on his breakfast. "Does it mean something?"

"I don't think so." She replied. "But you didn't make something like what the others have."

"Well, you are not like the others."

Of course not.

He watched her again as she ate in silence.

"What do you think?" She asked looking up at him.

"Think about what?"

"Me. You have been studying me."

He smiled faintly. "Your eyes are cold and empty again."

She blinked. Empty?

"You are not even angry." He sighed as if it was a bad thing.

"Why would you want me to be angry?" She frowned.

Then she remembered that he wanted a reaction from her of course.

He leaned forward, his warm eyes looking into hers. "Have you ever stared into emptiness? It is frightening and melancholic. That is what it feels like to look into your eyes now."

She was taken aback.

A frown settled between his eyebrows and he stood up from his seat. "Lunch will be at my mother's home. Come in time."

"Wait! Can I go visit Georgia?"

"Yes." He said and then left quickly. She was confused by why he suddenly ran away.

Lunch at his mother, where she would see Saul and Zoila again. Great. As she cleaned up, Aaron came to visit.

"Are you feeling better today?" He asked looming over the table as she put away the dishes.

"Yes."

"People are talking about you."

She paused. "Why?"

"Well, they saw you spend time with me and my cousins. I guess they didn't expect that friendliness."

She sighed. She thought it was something bad.

"By the way, how did you become friends with them? Especially after how they treated you the first day."

"I am not sure," she said thinking of Georgia. She reminded her so much of Corinna. "I just helped treat Nelli and then they were all friendly."

He nodded as if it all made sense. "You treated Nelli?"

"Yes. Why?"

"The poor boy has been sick very often. We are seeing more and more dragons getting sick and not healing. I don't know why."

"It can be the environment and change down the generations. We don't remain the same. Humans discover new diseases all the time and develop healthcare."

He nodded. "You are right. We should do that too. Thankfully we have you here."

She smiled a little.

"And the three sisters are very close. If you win one over, you win all."

"I guess they are different than you and your brothers then."

He chuckled. "Indeed. Do you want to go for a ride later?"

"Your brother won't like it."

"Do you care?" He raised a brow.

"I don't want you to get into a fight."

"Trust me, fighting is in our nature. Even without others getting involved, we have already beaten each other bloody."

She frowned. "Why?"

He shrugged. "That is how brothers are."

"Really?"