Traveling through the Warhammer world, but I didn’t cry

If Tzeentch's Labyrinth and Crystal Palace represent endless change, then Nurgle's Plague Garden represents eternal stasis and the infinite cycle of decay and rebirth. As a god who represents life to some extent in the universe, Nurgle prefers to trick the enemy compared to the insane Khorne who has a human head KPI, Slaanesh who only has yellow waste and various perverted ways of playing, and who likes to trick enemies. His unscrupulous boss Tzeentch, Nurgle is indeed a very kind and easy-going god.

The premise is that you can survive his kind blessing. Mortals who cannot bear its power will move towards death in endless pain and decay, or towards the torture of eternal disease that is more painful than death. .

But if you are lucky enough to survive the blessing, congratulations, please enjoy the magnificent scenery of Nurgle Garden! Flesh flowers are in bud, and the land is covered with mold. Even those who are flawless have no splendor. Nurgle is a true artist, Tzeentch is nothing more than a troublemaker, young Slaanesh is a libertine, and we don't even bother to deal with Khorne's narrow-minded and savage temper. ——Othalus "The Raven", Captain of the Plague Space Marines, Champion of Nurgle

Imagine this character, a cross between your loving grandfather and Santa Claus, and you get the gifts he carefully prepares for you every Christmas, but those are the germs he cooks out of various cauldrons.

Your life has become a mess. No one loves you and no one cares about you. But Father Nurgle will not. He shows you his love and compassion for you and fully accepts you for who you are. Even if he has an unkempt beard, unwashed underwear and occasionally eats some snot from his nose, Nurgle thinks this is good.

You become a loyal believer of Nurgle, and even have the honor to go one step further in the future, becoming Nurgle's demon and champion, playing and playing in their green swamps and dripping corpse oil, the naughty Nurgling. Holding your ears or helmet, holding on to your senseless swollen intestines squeezed out of the armor and swinging on it, or drilling into your rotten nasal cavity and coming out from another section covered in snot and mucus, making a shrill noise. Pleasant laughter.

ah! What a beautiful and warm scene. Everything you do is to allow more suffering people to fall into the arms of this big family and feel the love of a loving father. Although he never said what you must do, but How could you, with such a strong sense of responsibility, wait for orders from your loving father? So you worked hard to spread the doctrine and the plague, so that more people could feel the love of a loving father despite their illness. Looking at the yellow and white pus and pulp all over their bodies, you just feel extremely happy, and a green sticky snot bubble pops up.

In the depths of this rotten garden, a huge number of Nurgle demons are surrounding a swamp house with a green smell. There is an untainted white figure in it, which looks so out of place in this dirty field. .

In front of the white figure was a huge green fat man, holding a large spoon in his hand that might have been made from plant roots in the garden, stirring the disgusting stew in front of him.

Elsa looked at Nurgle stirring the cauldron with an expressionless face, then looked at the noisy Nurgle demons and Nurgling spirits who were making endless noises, and sighed deeply.

As the Eldar goddess of fertility, she was lucky enough to survive the Pantheon massacre after the birth of Slaanesh, but she was also captured by Slaanesh's surge in power. Elsa did not want to become Slaanesh's sex doll. The space was crying desperately for its own fate and the fate of the Eldar.

This sky-breaking despair made Nurgle on the other side feel infinitely fond of him. How could he, a loving man, let such a desperate guy throw himself into the hands of that ungentlemanly guy in Slaanesh?

This was one of the few times that Nurgle wanted to compete with other Chaos Gods. He challenged the newborn Slaanesh and successfully defeated him and regained Elsa's "freedom".

Then he took it to his garden to accompany the desperate Eldar god. During their long relationship, Nurgle carefully made countless soups for her, and then used an ancient custom that has been passed down for a long time for Elsa to taste.

"Hehe, hahahahaha, here comes the soup! Drink, drink, why don't you drink?"

The goddess Elsa, who was kindly invited, took the soup and drank it again and again in order to prevent these fatal diseases from spreading to the universe, and then used her own power to heal her damaged intestines and stomach.

To be honest, this makes Nurgle a little unhappy. After all, it is a very sad thing that his blessing cannot be reflected in a guy he likes. But Nurgle soon found Elsa's new purpose.

Just like an excellent chef needs a tricky tongue, Elsa's healing and vague feelings always give Nurgle new inspiration to constantly modify the diseases he has been curing for countless years. I believe that one day On this day, with the help of cute Elsa, I can create the ultimate blessing, so that all the creatures in the universe can live happily together, without fighting or killing, without any changes, and forever stagnating in the most beautiful world. moment, a moment of eternal decay.

Thinking of this, Nurgle stopped what he was doing and looked at the quiet Elsa with his maggot-like eyes.

Elsa also noticed Nurgle's kindness towards her, and nodded slightly in response. To be honest, Elsa doesn't hate Nurgle in essence. After all, as the goddess of life of the Eldar, she is essentially close to Nurgle's attributes, and Elsa can indeed feel that Nurgle's true intentions are indeed good. , the only problem is that the creatures in the universe cannot bear his abnormal kindness. He always feeds himself some weird things and treats himself with care and kindness. To be honest, Aisha has never been treated like this in the Eldar Pantheon.

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Kane, who is always angry, is like a wild dog biting anyone who tries to get close to him, while Asuyan, who is always cold and silent, is a superman who basically doesn't care about anything, and even says hello when something happens. I'm too lazy to say yes. Her husband, Kunos, had become a memory, and Lilith lay dormant in Slaanesh's stomach. (The few things Asuryan ever took care of may be to separate the Eldar people from the gods, and then used his infinite wisdom to think of a way to solve Kane's violent temper, which was to let him capture Aisha and Kunos. There is no misfortune in the secret room, but recent books suggest that this guy spread his power into the bodies of the war witches after being devoured by Slaanesh)

Nurgle's cauldron was slowly stirred, and more and more bubbles emerged from the green pulp. This was a sign that the pot was about to be cooked. The Nurgle demons and Nurgle spirits gathered around to watch the loving father's cooking. Everyone closed their mouths and stared at the sacred moment of creating the plague.

Nurgle's mumbling voice came, but no one could hear clearly what he was saying in his voice that was mixed with phlegm and pus. Nurgle took out the big stirring spoon and took a piece from the dirty kitchen counter. Wiping his hands with a wet and sticky cloth.

And began to continuously add plague condiments of various colors to it. Red blood, green juice, yellow sauce, and white pus were all sprinkled on the surface of the cauldron.

Using his big feet to extinguish the green flames burning underneath, Nurgle stretched his fingers in and stirred the surface, so that the condiments added later were distributed more evenly.

It had been stirring for an unknown amount of time. Amidst the hungry sounds of the Nurgle demons swallowing their saliva, Nurgle licked his fingers and smacked his lips: "Well, the taste is pretty good this time, not as salty as you said in the past." ”

Aisha's delicate and beautiful face showed a gentle and joyful smile: "It's better to eat lighter. Eating salty is not good for your health."

Nurgle filled a large bowl of "delicious food" and handed it to Elsa.

This bowl is still a bit big for Aisha, as if she was eating from a basin. Looking at these fresh "delicious foods" that were still bubbling, Aisha blew lightly, then raised the basin-like bowl and swallowed it in large gulps.

This scene must have happened countless times. Elsa's swallowing movements were so elegant and perfect that not a single bit was leaked, and everything was eaten into her stomach.

The remaining Nurgle demons were so greedy that their thick and yellow saliva slipped from the corners of their mouths and dripped on the ground like strings. Nurgle also looked at Aisha with expectant eyes, hoping that she could give some precious feedback.

Aisha licked her lips, closed her eyes, and carefully felt her stomach that was constantly being eroded by disease and food but was constantly being repaired. She opened her eyes and looked at Nurgle and the demons who were watching, and said something that they had been looking forward to for hundreds of years. They have been waiting in hunger for so long for this curse that is enough to shock the soul, but it is all worth it!

Showing a cheerful and free smile, Aisha opened her red lips. The demons in the audience suddenly became excited and cheered with hoarse voices!

"Clean and hygienic, brothers!"

The Star Wars memes are indeed somewhat relevant