Traveling through the Warhammer world, but I didn’t cry

Kalos, the most omniscient and omnipotent servant of Tzeentch, climbed out of the Well of Eternity that even Tzeentch could not understand. This creation that existed before the birth of Tzeentch did not swallow up and tear apart the weak Tzeentch demon. Broken, but it gave him the power to see into the past and the future.

Although Tzeentch can know everything about the past and present, and can weave the fate of life in the universe through the web of fate hanging above his head, he cannot foresee the future as accurately as Carlos.

This humanoid bird-headed demon with two heads. One head will tell completely objective facts, and the other head will tell equally credible lies. Now he feels the call of Tzeentch to him and steps onto the crystal. Steps to meet the true guardians of knowledge.

If you don’t look at the original setting of the old man + the blind man, it’s really cool.

Bending to Tzeentch, the great guardian of knowledge, in a gesture of loyalty, both heads of Carlos spoke at the same time.

"Praise be to the Lord of change." "Praise be to the Lord of change."

Tzeentch was in no mood to infer that his head was telling the truth. He only needed Carlos to use trickery and prophecies among the other Chaos Gods to focus their attention on the subject.

"Carlos, I will give you a mission. Go to the realm of Slaanesh and Khorne, stimulate the desire in their hearts, and let them focus on the Subject."

"I don't want to do it." "I'm happy to oblige."

"Then go quickly."

"I like to stand still." "I will weave the plan of destiny."

Tzeentch looked at Carlos who was getting up, turned around and left, muttering: "I can see the past!" "I can see the future!"

"There's nothing to do now!" "There's nothing to do now!"

Although the guys from the Tzeentch faction are more or less crazy, after all, the eternal changes and uncertain wind directions make any long-term and stable idea impossible. If you want to keep up with Tzeentch's To prevent your soul from being shattered by the torrent of chaos, you need to maintain an extremely high-speed and changeable way of thinking.

But Carlos's madness index is obviously too high, even by devil's standards. It's a bit too high. Because of his madness, the time span of his predictions about the past and the future is extremely large. Sometimes he predicts the next second, and sometimes he predicts the end of everything. Even the nine recorders who were sent to record his crazy words were contaminated by his crazy words and riddle-like prophecies, and had no idea what was actually useful about what was recorded in those eternal books. .

But at least Carlos is efficient in doing things. Although he is a little crazy, he is still normal in most cases. Tzeentch watched Carlos walk to the crystal staircase and noticed that he stopped.

"I can see my past walking up the stairs!" "I can see my future limping out of the field!"

"There is nothing to do now!" "There is nothing to do now?"

Then he walked boldly forward.

Tzeentch covered his face, feeling embarrassed. He already knew how Carlos was going to go downstairs.

"Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah!"

Carlos stepped on the air, and his huge double-headed body rolled all the way from the top to the bottom. He screamed in pain during the close collision with the steps, and his two colorful and huge wings were rolling down. A lot of feathers fell off, scattered on the steps, and were swallowed up by the changing fissures that emerged from them.

After covering his ears and listening to the sound of Carlos falling for more than ten minutes, Tzeentch covered his face and wondered whether he should find someone else to handle this important matter.

Carlos got up from the ground, shook his crystal dust-stained wings, and limped away.

————

Slaanesh watched boredly as he used the newly constructed wailing lens of billions of tortured souls to appreciate everything in the universe. To be honest, these things had made him feel a little boring after tens of thousands of years of viewing and torture. , only the essential person can rejuvenate himself with new happiness.

But when he switched to Lin Fan's line of sight, he was disgusted by his ordinary military life. The wonderful interaction with the mechanical girl had not happened for a long time. As a last resort, Slaanesh had to look to other creatures for some solace.

"The Gomorrepp match will be held at a standard flow of 2/5000. The rules this time are the same as last time. Before cutting off the opponent's head, he must first be raped and then draped over his body. Scores one point for throwing his head into the grinder."

"The grand party in the Gomo Toxic Layer is about to begin. Slaves from tens of thousands of worlds will dance in the mutation-dissolving poison sponsored by Kanhard Blood Mercy to see whose body can produce the most violent mutations and jump out of the most painful dance."

Slaanesh, who was cutting the stage a little, just felt bored. Their ancestors had already played these things, but they were still playing them now. It was really nothing new.

Those dark cities hidden deep in the webway did protect them very well, but this did not affect Slaanesh's gaze on their fresh and juicy souls, but considering that these should have been eaten by him, The little guy lacks a steady stream of taxes that provide him with torture and pleasure, and Slaanesh is too lazy to eat them all. After all, it is better to have a steady flow of water and sustainable development than to kill the goose to obtain the eggs.

Feeling bored, Slaanesh began to think about Khorne who was fighting him, and whether he should go to his place to steal a few blessed blood artifacts and take them back to play with. They were already fighting anyway, and they didn't care how old he was. Angry.

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"My noble King of Desire, please allow your humble servant to make you a small and foolish suggestion."

"Oh ho ho ho, a little succubus who dares to speak. This is really new and exciting. Say it. After you finish speaking, I will pull out your leather sheath and put it on my vagina."

"Oh! Oh oh oh~ It's such an honor." The little succubus spoke, imagining the scene where the leather quilt on her body was put on her breasts, and her already pink skin showed an unhealthy and pathological flush. "My King, why don't you send Lucius to have a good time with that toy? I believe the Immortal Lucius will have a pleasant blood party."

"Oh oh oh oh! Yes, yes! You remind me like this, it reminds me, what a good little succubus! Come on, come on, I can't wait to put on your skin and fuck you hard Rep you got it.”

"Oh my lord."

There was the sound of flesh being torn off, pink blood dripping slowly, and in this chaotic and crazy scene, a flash of blue light dissipated.

————

"Oh ho ho ho ho! Look at me, little one! I'm a little Eldar girl now!"

"You disgusting beast"

The Wailing Banshee of the Eldar was pierced by a wet, twisted whip that looked like a tongue. The other Eldar warriors around her died miserably, with no whole body left.

The Eldar team that was recovering soul stones was attacked by the chaotic pervert in front of them. He even tore off the sister's face and stuck it on his own face. Such mockery made the banshee ignore the pain and weakness in her body. He yelled at the lunatic in front of him.

"You are so boring, baby." Not being able to see the emotion he wanted, the man was a little disappointed. The painful flesh and blood face on the armor also changed with the emotion of the wearer, all showing disappointed expressions.

"But look, what is this? A delicious piece of candy~" He took out a stone from somewhere and shook it at the banshee.

"No." This is the soul stone, which is where the spirit souls rest and is also necessary to protect them from being devoured by powerful enemies.

"Hahahaha! You're scared! I'm going to eat it and soak it in my saliva!"

"No. No. Please don't."

"Ah~~~I want to eat it!" Ignoring the banshee's pleas at all, Lucius threw the precious soul stone into his mouth, secreting a large amount of saliva and stirring it back and forth with his flexible tongue. , making a rustling sound. At the same time, he did not forget to look at the state of the banshee who had lost his helmet in front of him.

"No, no. You." In the midst of extreme anger and guilt, the seriously injured banshee breathed her last, tilted her head and stopped moving.

"Tch, it's really boring." He spit out the soul stone into his hand and decided to tease the Eldar with this ultimate humiliation next time he met them. Then he heard Slaanesh calling him.

"Hey! Hmm! Ah! Ah~~" It sounded like it was twisted several times, and the pervert in flesh and blood armor walked towards the crack that Slaanesh had opened for him.