Villain Cultivator
Chapter 603 - Eden Garden Sect Annual Assessment Examination (1)
Chapter 603 – Eden Garden Sect Annual Assessment Examination (1)
"So you've grown older instead of getting a new power. I thought for sure that I would have gotten the [Bite the Dust] power."
Killer Queen rubbed her eyes and lazily groaned while being half-sleep, "Yeah, sure."
The black-haired oni woman slowly sat up and pointed her index finger at Xie Fan, "Bite the Dust."
CLICK
A miniature clone of Killer Queen suddenly appeared in front of Xie Fan. Then, it disappeared into her face.
Xie Fan screamed in panic. She circulated her Qi, trying to drive the strange thing out of her body.
But she couldn't sense it. It vanished.
"Huh?" Xie Fan was confused, "What did you do?"
Killer Queen didn't answer. She fell on the soft bed and continued sleeping, snoring like a 40-year-old fat drunkard who had gone through a wild party last night.
As for Miaomiao, he sweated profusely and looked back and forth between Xie Fan and Killer Queen. He could sense the clone of Killer Queen inside the loli wife of his, but it was also sleeping like its master.
For the time being, it didn't pose a threat to her.
Xie Fan slowly came back to her senses. She pointed at Killer Queen, "Who is this, husband? Is this your secret concubine?"
Miaomiao sighed, "That's my sentient weapon. She suddenly evolves and transforms into a human. Remember my black saber?"
"Oh? That whatever-grade weapon?"
"Yeah."
Xie Fan walked closer to the bed and pried Killer Queen's mouth open. The former touch the tip of the latter's tongue, and she got a cut on her fingertip. The tongue's barbed surface was even sharper than a tiger's.
Xie Fan grinned, "Well, I'm relieved. At least, you can't have sex with this broad."
"Yeah, her pussy skin is too sharp. My dick will be ground into minced meat if I put it in there."
"Hahaha! Yeah, you can't use her mouth either. Here, look at her barbed tongue. It's worse than a tiger!"
Miaomiao glanced at it. He immediately looked away and closed his eyes while his expression turned ugly.
The tongue was horrifying. The barbed part was like a land of parasites - Every branch of barbed blade moved freely like living tentacles, but they were as sharp as razor blades.
Sticking it in there would spell a disaster!
NOPE!
Much NOPE!
Seriously, NOPE!
But still, Miaomiao suddenly recalled that he could use the Dao of War God and the Dao of Saint to buff his physical defense. The thing might be immune to the cuts…
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPEEEEEEEEEEE!!
Miaomiao jumped up and slammed his head to the wall. The wall was broken, but his forehead was unharmed.
He took a deep breath as he came back to his senses. For once in a while, his brain emerged victorious over his PP brain.
"Err, husband, are you okay?"
Miaomiao brightly smiled and gave Xie Fan's a thumbs up, "Yesn't."
"…"
Seeing that Miaomiao's mind was in a mess, Xie Fan excused herself and left him alone.
Miaomiao stared at the sleeping beauty. Although he wanted to bully her, he put on his clothes and walked to the window to get some fresh air.
He secretly communicated with his soul sentinel.
'Meowmeow, are you there?'
'Yes, munya?'
'Can you check if Killer Queen has become a munya-grade weapon?'
'Sure, munya!'
Miaomiao opened the dantian portal and let Meowmeow out. The cathulhu transformed into a small catopus and jumped out.
As soon as Meowmeow sat Killer Queen, he nodded, "Indeed, she's a munya-grade weapon, munya!"
"How did you know?"
"All munya-grade artifacts usually transform into real bodies of the weapon spirits, munya. That woman should be the true appearance of the spirit when she is at her prime, munya!"
"I see. What about the invincible under the Heavenly Dao thingy? Do I get it?"
"Munya?"
Meowmeow gazed at Miaomiao for a moment and looked at Killer Queen again. He frowned, "I don't sense the connection between you, that woman, and the Heavenly Dao, munya!"
"Hmm?"
Miaomiao knitted his brows.
Sometimes, people made mistakes. Miaomiao thought that the cat might have misheard or mistaken some information regarding Heavenly Dao.
To confirm the information, Miaomiao asked his system, "Dion, can you confirm that Killer Queen is connected to Heavenly Dao?"
Ding
<Heavenly Dao is not bound to Killer Queen or you.>
"What about the power of invincibility? Can I or Killer Queen still be killed?"
<Heavenly Dao of Zenith Heaven is kind and benevolent. The quest rewards gave you the marbles that didn't post a restriction on the consumers as you have been obstinately refusing to become a part of Heavenly Dao. Therefore, Killer Queen is not bound by Heavenly Dao.>
<In short, she doesn't get the benefit of invincibility under the Heavenly Dao.>
<In addition, Heavenly Dao is aware of your trickeries. You can't cheat by binding Killer Queen with the Heavenly Dao and enjoy the power of invincibility without returning the favor.>
"… Yikes."
Miaomiao facepalmed.
Indeed, he tried to cheat Heavenly Dao.
At first, Miaomiao planned to give Killer Queen the power of invincibility so that he could use her as a shield. Unfortunately, the Heavenly Dao knew and had already patched the loophole.
Miaomiao turned to the cat, "If Killer Queen doesn't have the absolute protection of Heavenly Dao, what grade is she?"
"At best, myth-grade, munya!"
Miaomiao shrugged, "Fair enough. But what's the difference between heaven-grade, immortal-grade, divine-grade, and myth-grade?"
"You're comparing the power of mortals, immortals, deities, and sages, munya."
"… I see. I get what you mean."
Meowmeow's examples were easy to understand. Miaomiao could see the big picture.
"So, Killer Queen is now a deity?"
"From the looks of it, I guess so, munya!"
"Cool."
Miaomiao fetched a golden tuna, which his consciousness had stored in the dantian warehouse. Then, Miaomiao gave it to Meowmeow.
The cathulhu caught the fish in glee and returned to the dantian world.
Now that Miaomiao's weapon was comparable to a deity, he was confident that he should be safe in the upcoming event. In an emergency, Miaomiao could also summon Xu Chu and others to help him.
Currently, Xu Chu was the strongest Dao Soul as she had a power plant constellation star to supply additional Soul Essence and Providence Qi in the case that she ran out of energy. Moreover, her primary Dao, the Dao of Corruption, was strengthened because of her status as a sentinel.
In combat, Xu Chu could instantly crush any young gods. As for older gods, Miaomiao didn't know since Xu Chu rarely used the sparring mode to train.
…
Several days later
Miaomiao stared at the calendar paper, which had been hung on the wall. He was baffled, wondering how months and years of this world worked.
Although the planet was several times bigger than Earth, the calendar still used the 365-day-per-year as the standard, which was abnormal.
After all, this huge planet and its chain network couldn't possibly orbit around the massive black sun within 365 days. It barely reached 1% of the orbital path!
CREAK
While Miaomiao was absentminded, Xie Lian finally showed up. He barged into Miaomiao's room and slapped his shoulder so hard that it was dislocated.
Miaomiao grumbled and glared at Xie Lian. However, the latter beamed him with a bright smile.
"Well done!"
Question marks floated over Miaomiao's head, "Huh?"
"I knew you can do it! Good job!"
"What did I do?"
Xie Lian wrapped his arm around Miaomiao's shoulder, "Aren't Xie Fan pregnant?"
"Oh…"
"It must have been hard for you. Immortals like us aren't fertile, and it's even harder for female immortals to ovulate. From what I know, the woman must love the man so much that she is willing to get pregnant to ovulate. Otherwise, everything we do is in vain. Welp, that works for us if we only want to have fun! HAHAHAHA!"
Xie Lian seemed to be in a good mood. He laughed a lot, and his mouth smelled like wine.
Yup, he was drunk.
How did this invincible god get intoxicated anyway? Was that even possible?
The corner of Miaomiao's eyes caught the silhouettes of a dozen elves, whose skins were paler than papers. For a moment there, Miaomiao thought that he saw either ghosts or vampires.
Xie Lian pointed at the men, "Let me introduce you. Those men are our backup servants. Actually, they are servants of Fuxi Sage."
The leader of the elves stepped into the room. He was an elder elf, whose wrinkles and hollow eyes looked like a dead mummy.
Although he looked weak, his providence aura revealed his status as a deity!
Yet, the elf elder humbly saluted to Miaomiao.
"I am Fu Daotian, the King Piece of Sage Fuxi. A pleasure to meet you, Young Master Mao."
Miaomiao's pupil shrank, and he sensed a chill running up and down his spine.
Fu surname?
Vampire-like constitution?
King Piece?!
This told many stories!
Miaomiao had a scare. After all, he and his wives had killed Fu De. He wondered whether they were relatives or not.
Fu Daotian seemed to be able to read Miaomiao's mind. He snickered, "Whatever happened in the mortal worlds is unrelated to us. We have so many descendants with Fu surname, but we never treat them as one of our own. After all, we are pure-blood while they are merely insects."
"…"
Miaomiao gulped and politely saluted back at Fu Daotian, "M-Mao Miaomiao greets Your Majesty Fu."
"Hahaha! Just call me by my name. We have the same status, so it's fine!"
"Same status?" Miaomiao knitted his brows.
Fu Daotian glanced at Xie Lian, "Haven't you told him?"
Xie Lian burped and shook his head, "Nah. I thought he knew."
"How would he know if no one had told him? We are supposed to relay this info to him to prep him for the next game."
Xie Lian shrugged again. He didn't seem to care.
Fu Daotian sighed. He looked at Miaomiao, "My deepest apologies for my drunk colleague. Young Master Mao, please come with us. I shall explain it while we head to the examination site. The annual examination will start tomorrow, and we need to register the participants."
The vampire elf moved his fingers. Fu Daotian manipulated the blanket to wrap around Killer Queen and lifted her in the air. He carried her outside while she was sleeping.
Miaomiao followed after Fu Daotian.
The remaining people of the castle, Liu Guang, Ta Dun, and Tugu also jumped up to the sky, following Miaomiao as well.
The followers of Fu Daotian glanced at the group of women. They peered at Liu Guang in disdain, but they looked confused when they gazed at Ta Dun and Tugu, who was still under the effect of gender-swap pills.
"They smelt like virgins, but I can smell foul semen from them. What the hell?"
"I'm also confused. Are they virgin maidens or horny men?"
Ta Dun and Tugu's expressions were blank. Meanwhile, Liu Guang burst into laughter.
These vampire elves were attracted to the virgin yin energy in their dantian, but they hated Liu Guang's Qi. After all, she was not a virgin, and she hoarded insects in her body. Several centipedes also lived inside her.
…
Fu Daotian, Xie Lian, Miaomiao, Liu Guang, Ta Dun, Tugu, and vampire followers traveled over a desert and reached the 12th initiate peak.
The peak was crowded with over 100,000 cultivators today. Most of them levitated and observed the event from the sky while participants descended onto the mountain peak to register.
Strangely, the cultivators seemed colorful today. Unlike the usual, where no woman was in sight, many women dressed in fancy clothes. Some wore only a few pieces to hide their private parts while some wore full robes, not revealing their skins.
Miaomiao narrowed his eyes as his woman radar PP warned him about their true genders. He kept glancing at the women's neck by instinct, but he didn't spot any Adam's apple.
No ladyboy, fortunately.
But unfortunately, all women here were once men, who had eaten the gender-swap pills of Miaomiao!
Miaomiao felt like he was now in an MMORPG game. He kept thinking of the MMORPG's alternate meaning.
Many-Man-Online-Role-Player-Girls
Yup, it was that feeling. All those women were men inside!
After thinking this far, Miaomiao's boner was killed. He ignored all women and proceeded to the registration queue.
Tugu was an initiate of the sect. He also joined Miaomiao. As for Ta Dun, he was a candidate, so he went to another registration queue.
…
While Miaomiao, Ta Dun, and Tugu were busy reporting their names and statuses to the sect deacons, a tall immortal descended through the atmosphere like a shooting star.
The newcomer managed to stabilize before he landed on the top of the 12th initiate peak. His clothes were burnt, but his underwear was intact.
As he was half-naked, the tattoo on his back was visible for the crowd to see.
It was a tattoo of a falcon's head and a giant sun.
As for the front, he had red lines tattoo, which highlighted his muscle and six pacts. However, he painted his nipples into large eyes.
The half-naked man ignored the queue and pushed the front person out of the way. He placed his candidate token on the table and stared at the deacon's face.
"Register my name, please."
The deacon glared back at the candidate, but he kept glancing at the person's eye-nipples.
"Next time, don't cut the queue, Junior Horus."
The deacon passed back the token and gave him a bamboo scroll, which contained a number and details of Horus.
[1]
"Sweet! I'm the first rank candidate again?"
The deacon shook his head, but he didn't bother with Horus. He called for the next candidate, "Next!"
Horus laughed and strolled toward the hall.
Every elder and deacon sighed as they peered at Horus.
"That troublemaker is here again. I hope the initiates can hold their ranks this year."
"That's impossible. I doubt the current initiates can defeat Horus. He's now a freaking 35-Star Stellar Constellation.
"That guy is despicable. He can already become an inner disciple, but he purposely got himself demoted to bully juniors."
"SHH. Hush, people. Don't let him hear it, or his father will come and find trouble with us again."
"Haiz. I hope Grand Elder Rah can control his little brother…"
Everybody sighed once more.
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