god level spoof

() Life is like this sometimes. Very romantic, very bloody. At the beginning, you thought your life was like an eight o'clock soap opera, but in the middle you may be pleasantly surprised to find that it turned into a comedy by Zhou Xingxing. But then

In the end, you will be helpless to discover that Ya turns out to be a Korean drama... You can guess the beginning, but you definitely can't guess the ending.

From the moment Dugu Qiubei and Ximen Chuixue appeared, Li Ye thought he had met two extremely lucky stars.

One is Dugu Qiu, a generation of sword demons who have defeated all the heroes in the world in their life, and even become lonely and only want one defeat. The other is Ximen Chuixue, who loves swords as much as his life, and takes human lives in the midst of lightning and flint, which makes the martial arts people

be terrified.

Li Ye imagined that he could finally be at ease. These two great gods should have noble sentiments and a great sense of social responsibility. They would be able to protect him from wind and rain and solve some troubles...

But the truth was cruel. What he never expected was that Dugu Qiufang was a beautiful girl, while Ximen Chuixue was a transvestite - would a girl and a transvestite have feelings and a sense of responsibility? Li Ye really didn't have any expectations for this.

.

To this end, Li Ye plans to carefully study the original works, starting with "The Legend of the Condor Heroes" about Dugu Qiubai.

Before that, Li Ye still had to calm down the beautiful girl Dugu Qiubai and the transvestite Ximen Chuixue. Because the two had been fighting for nearly a day, the water in their bodies was quite depleted, so the two immediately asked for water.

Li Ye led the two of them to the water dispenser and pointed to the water cup in the cabinet below: "Nuo, the cup below is the cup, and there is water in it. You guys go on and drink it yourself."

The two looked at each other, then each took out a cup, and then looked at the bottled water above the water dispenser.

The two looked at each other again. The beautiful girl Dugu Qiubai took a step forward, and then slowly stretched out her right hand. An invisible edge appeared in the air, and it seemed that the target was the bucket of water...

"Hey, what are you doing?" Li Ye asked quickly.

The Dugu girl rolled her eyes and gave him a look of disdain: "Of course you have to cut off the lid of this bucket of water. Otherwise, how can you use a cup to scoop water?"

"..." Li Ye was stunned, and then patted his forehead, secretly cursing himself for being careless. Dugu Qiubai was an ancient person, how could he know how to use a water dispenser?

There was no other way. Li Ye had no choice but to personally demonstrate how to pick up the water, and pointed out which side was cold water and which side was hot water. Then he returned the water cup in his hand to Dugu girl, saying: "Remember, if you are picking up the water,

Don’t drink the boiling water right away, as it will burn you.”

The beautiful girl Dugu Qiubai looked at the water dispenser with curiosity, and was extremely surprised by the magical ability of the thing in front of her. She asked: "What is the name of this thing? How can it have such mysterious functions?"

Ximen Chuixue was not willing to be lonely and sighed: "Yes, I guess even the emperor in Ouchi doesn't have such a spiritual treasure."

Faced with the two people praising an ordinary water dispenser, Li Ye was not amused. This was a normal thing. How could an ancient person suddenly appear in modern times understand this? Even if it was Dugu Qiubai and

Ximen Chuixue, after all, no matter how strong their martial arts are, they still don’t have the ability to predict the future.

Li Ye thought for a while and asked: "By the way, what are your names? I don't know yet, please tell me."

"Alone and seeking defeat."

"Ximen Chuixue."

The names they answered made Li Zhiye doubtful. Could it be that this was the name of the fifteen or six-year-old Dugu Qiufei? But naturally he would not show it on his face, but smiled calmly: "Qiufang, and Chuixue."

Brother, I’m Li Ye, why did you first come here? If there’s anything you don’t understand, just ask me and I’ll tell you everything I know.”

After that, Li Ye quickly turned on the computer and searched for passages describing Dugu Qiubai in The Legend of the Condor Heroes:

The description on the front is: "The sword demon Dugu Qiubai is invincible in the world, so he buried his sword here. Woohoo! The heroes are tied up, and the long sword is empty, how sad!"

On the side, it is described through several swords in the sword tomb: "Fierce and fierce, invincible, and used to compete with the heroes of Heshuo before the weak crown. The soft sword of Ziwei was used before the age of thirty. It accidentally injured a righteous man and was unlucky, so it was abandoned in the deep valley.

.The heavy sword has no edge and no skill. Before the age of forty, it was used throughout the world. After the age of forty, it can be used as a sword regardless of objects. From then on, it is refined and refined, and it gradually becomes possible to defeat those with swords without swords.

territory."

After reading these paragraphs, Li Ye couldn't help but frown. No matter which angle he analyzed it from, Dugu Qiufei should be a man, but why...

What best proves Dugu Qiu's defeating nature is the sentence "Weak crowns are used to compete with the heroes of Heshuo". In ancient times, weak crowns referred to men in their twenties.

Li Ye, who was puzzled, finally shook his head. It seemed that he could only slowly understand...

After looking at the time, Li Ye planned to buy groceries and it was time to prepare dinner.

After going downstairs, Li Qiang and his wife came up and asked, "Xiaoye, how are you? Have your two heroes upstairs tried to win or lost, or plan to teach you some magical skills or something."

Regarding the visits of Ximen Chuixue and Dugu Qiubai, Li Ye naturally would not hide his father and mother. There is no doubt about the status of his family in his heart.

Li Ye smiled very complicatedly: "How should I put it? Well, actually I can't believe it myself. Forget it, why don't you wait for me to confirm it first?"

"Oh, by the way, I'm going to buy groceries. Those two guys above, please take it easy."

After giving the explanation, Li Ye immediately went out and headed towards the large market not far from home. He had to pay more attention this time.

Li Qiang and his wife looked at each other. Neither of them understood what Li Ye meant, but they naturally understood the following sentence: "Haha, it seems that the food tonight will be rich."

…

In the innermost iron fence of Shibeijing Mental Hospital, an ugly-looking old man was sitting on a broken chair. He was tapping Erlang's legs. There was a slipper dangling on the thumb of one of them, and he was holding a slipper in both hands.

A piece of "Jiangnan Evening News", looking at the message on it with no strange expression.

Needless to say, the identity of this old man is none other than Fire Cloud Evil God.

Since he came to this world yesterday afternoon and entered the mental hospital under the leadership of Li Ye, Mr. Evil God immediately slipped out at night without anyone noticing, and then without disturbing anyone,

I took (sweat~) more than ten different newspapers.

Oh, by the way, Mr. Evil God felt a little hungry on the way, so he took a few roast geese, a few kilograms of beef, a few bowls of chaos... and then returned to his own iron fence.

In one day, Huoyun Evil God had a rough understanding of the current situation of this society. It seemed that all the masters of this era were extinct.

"Tsk, it's really boring. I want to kill a real master. Where can I find a master?"

Fire Cloud Evil God muttered in his mouth, his expression ferocious and terrifying, and then he grinned slightly and smiled strangely: "That boy is really a martial arts wizard. Maybe one day he accidentally opened up the Rendu and Du's second line, and even I am not him

As for my opponent, fortunately I know the long-lost toad skill, which can ensure that I am invincible..."

"Alas~"

Fire Cloud Evil God suddenly stood up from the chair and sighed: "Life~ is so lonely as snow, ah~";