god level spoof

() Li Ye came out of Shibeijing Mental Hospital in a very bad mood.

Don't get me wrong, Li Ye is not a mental patient, nor are his father and mother. The main reason why he came here is to place a person named "Fire Cloud Evil God" inside.

That's right, he was the guy who could hold a bullet between his two fingers and said the famous saying, "All martial arts in the world are invincible, except speed." Finally, he was knocked down by the Tathagata God's palm.

We have to start from the beginning.

As usual, Li Ye hurried to Tianyu Media Film and Television Company after school. On the way, an old beggar on the roadside reached out and took Li Ye's arm.

At that moment, Li Ye's body trembled for no reason, as if he was being targeted by a wild beast. He subconsciously broke away from the old beggar's ultra-modern hand and prepared to run away.

"Kid, I see that you have amazing bones and are a unique martial arts wizard... I will leave the task of maintaining world peace to you from now on."

What a familiar opening remark. If you were reluctant to leave, at least Li Ye stopped, took out a few dollars from his pocket, and looked at the old man: "Oh, that's it. How much does a Tathagata Palm cost?"

Where is the Jiuyin Scripture? Is it cheaper..."

The old beggar shook his head mysteriously: "Then the Tathagata Palm and the Nine Yin Manual are all deceptions for children, and I am a god - I want to ask, do you want to be a god too?"

"..." Li Ye stared at the old beggar's majestic face for nine point six seconds, and finally choked out a sentence: "God? It's such a good profession. You should keep it to yourself?"

But the master is the master, and what the old beggar said next made Li Ye love, er, worship him for no reason.

"Your underwear has red, yellow and blue stripes + a cannon pattern on the front + a capital letter 's' pattern on the left + a capital letter 'm' pattern on the right + a chrysanthemum pattern on the back."

As soon as these words came out, thousands of waves were immediately shocked. The eyes of the aunts, little girls, and old men on the streets and alleys fell on Li Ye one after another. The power of the attacks was no less than that of nuclear radiation.

(This is a pure adjective) Li Ye's face was sprayed with blood (purely an exaggeration).

Without saying a word, Li Ye picked up the old beggar and ran away. The scene and picture could be compared to the wedding scene in a soap opera.

Speaking of which, the underwear Li Ye wore today was actually what the old beggar described. Of course, Li Ye was not a pervert. The reason was that he lost a bet with his best friend the day before yesterday - he had to wear it for three days.

During these three days, Li Ye was extremely careful and confident: no one knew this secret...

Back to topic.

After arriving at the 'safe' zone, Li Ye calmed down and asked, "Old man, how did you know?"

"There's no need for me to waste time explaining such a simple thing."

The old beggar picked up the topic and then continued his dream. The target was Pangu, the daughter of the great god Pangu. This matter was not a big deal, but Pannu was already pregnant with your child, so Hongmeng Realm held a meeting.

Discuss a very serious social moral and ethical issue: How to treat a person who should have been a god but has not yet become a god and has a child with a god when he is about to be born but has not yet been born."

As a high school student, Li Ye dare not say that he is so knowledgeable that he knows everything, but he still understands some common sense of physiology - Li Ye began to doubt whether the old beggar in front of him was a level 10 mental patient, and he was right just now.

The color of the underwear is probably just a one-in-a-million coincidence.

"So, now you have three options: The first option is that you can become a time traveler and be given a real artifact (an ordinary weapon in Hongmeng Realm) + an upgrade system (an ordinary smart computer in Hongmeng Realm), and then you only need

It is enough to become a god through cultivation. Remember, you must at least become a great god at the level of Pangu.

Li Ye was puzzled: "Why do you have to become a great god like Pangu at least?"

"Nonsense, if you can't defeat Pangu, you will die - but you gave his daughter to..."

Li Ye: "..."

"Then, the second option is: if you can wait for Pannu to give birth to your child, and really only like her as a goddess, you can become a god in a day, and become a legal couple in Hongmeng Realm with Pannu.

Then Pangu has no right to control you."

"Oh, I forgot to tell you that excluding the possibility of premature birth, your and Pannu's child will not be born until three million years later. Therefore, during these three million years, you must remain as pure as jade... Since you are a mortal, I

If you mind becoming a monk, you can be reincarnated tens of thousands of times."

Li Ye rolled his eyes. It would be better to be killed by the great god Pangu than to be a monk for tens of thousands of reincarnations.

"Finally, the third option: As long as you do something for Hongmeng Realm, after this life is over, you will naturally be promoted to become a god."

Li Ye turned around expressionlessly: "What you said is really good. You are really powerful, but I haven't removed the earwax yet, 886." But the old beggar held his hand again: "Everything I said is true.

It’s more real than real gold.”

The old beggar suddenly retracted his hand, with a satisfied smile on his face: "Haha, this saves trouble, your dad has agreed."

"My dad agreed?" Li Ye was startled for a moment, then sneered: "Are you kidding? Do you know how to clone yourself?"

"Your father has agreed to the third option. From today on, you will become the person who defends the earth, the spokesperson of the earth and the ambassador of peace."

Li Ye roared: "I'm not a Saiyan!"

"To put it simply, the reason for the third choice is: the last round of the Gods Conference in Hongmeng Realm formulated a multi-interface and multi-dimensional integration policy, so you are fortunate to be the person who implements this policy. In the future, there will be others on the earth

When guests from this world or dimension come to visit, you just need to treat them well."

The old beggar said and waved his hand, and a man appeared out of thin air next to him. He was an ugly-looking old man with a bald head and a strange smile.

The strange thing is that no one around him showed any signs of surprise. It seemed that the old man had been standing there for a long time.

Li Ye also noticed this, blinked hurriedly and looked again, and found that the old man had indeed appeared suddenly, "Nima, could it be that this old beggar is really a god, and everything he said is true...

"

"Kid, this is Fire Cloud Evil God, his first guest on Earth. You must entertain him well."

After the old beggar said another sentence, he ignored it in an extremely irresponsible manner - Li Ye was sure that all the world champions in running events were scum compared to the old beggar.

Watching the old beggar's back disappear in an instant, Li Ye looked at the old man in front of him with a stiff expression, uh, it was Fire Cloud Evil God. Not only did this girl match his appearance, but his style was also not bad - a shabby white vest.

It was wrapped around her thighs, and her feet were wearing two unique slippers.

"Hehe...boy, you are the guardian of this world, you are too weak~" Fire Cloud Evil God Yin Yang said angrily, his expression full of disappointment and contempt.

Murderous intent! What is murderous intent? Li Ye didn't understand it at all before, but at this moment he can say with certainty: the guy in front of him has murderous intent towards him. It is a sense of death that is as real as a substance - directly piercing

Deep in the human soul.

Li Ye became confused and asked: "Senior, have you ever heard of the Tathagata Divine Palm?"

"Tathagata Divine Palm? Of course I know, it is a legendary palm technique, said to be dropped from the sky..." Fire Cloud Evil God replied, and grinned strangely: "Any martial arts practiced to the extreme will lead to the same goal through different paths - martial arts in the world

, Nothing can be broken, only speed can’t be broken!”

After hearing what he said, Li Ye breathed a sigh of relief. It seemed that this guy hadn't played against little Axing yet.

"You have a beautiful mouth, but in the end it was ripped off by the Tathagata God's palm."

Li Zhiyi cursed in his heart, but he smiled: "Senior's martial arts cultivation is really at its peak. He is probably invincible in the world, and even quite empty and lonely. No one can be your opponent anymore, but I can guarantee that you will be able to

Find some opponents for you."

"How confident are you that you can guarantee this?"

"Just because I am the guardian of this world."

"..." Fire Cloud Evil God was silent for a long time, and finally spoke again: "Take me to a mental hospital."

"Okay, senior, you won't be lonely for too long..."

…

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