god level spoof

This is a green field, dotted with colorful flowers, exuding freshness and sinful fragrance.

Li Ye lay lazily on the grass and closed his eyes.

Five hundred years have passed and Journey to the West has finally begun. I remember when I came here, the Monkey King had not yet been born.

Five hundred years ago, the Monkey King was not born yet, but now, will the Monkey King and Tang Monk go to get Buddhist scriptures?

Yes, the Monkey King is less than 500 years old, and he practiced Buddhism for hundreds of years (the monkeys caused trouble in the underworld because their Yang life has expired) before going to the Heavenly Palace...

Li Ye sat up all of a sudden. In this way, the Monkey King had not been suppressed for five hundred years at all. His eyes suddenly became extremely deep, as if he had penetrated the source - the Monkey King had only been suppressed for two hundred years.

Less than.

Why is it that it was only suppressed for two hundred years, but it is said that it was suppressed for five hundred years? The time is not right at all.

Li Ye's figure disappeared and came to the front of Five Elements Mountain.

He found that the mountain was shrouded in a Buddhist formation, and there were countless illusions inside, all of which were patches of blissful Buddha land, and the sounds of Buddha echoed endlessly.

Naturally, this formation couldn't stop Li Ye, so he stepped in with one step.

Then, Li Ye found a monkey's head exposed outside the mountain wall, and it was cursing:

"Reciting his grandfather's Buddhist scriptures is so annoying!"

"Tathagata, come out here, I, Sun, will fight you with a real sword and a real gun!"

"Damn it! What a bullshit paradise, I don't care about it at all!"

…

After a while of cursing, the monkey's voice lowered and he murmured:

"Jingjing, I miss you so much, you must wait for me."

"But, I'm about to forget you, what should I do, what should I do?"

At this point, the monkey became excited again and cursed loudly:

"Reciting tmd's Buddhist scriptures, I will soon forget Jingjing, I will soon forget my elder brother..."

"I don't know how Xiao Tiantian is doing. I remember that she likes my eldest brother very much and has been sticking behind him. She should be married to him. I wish you happiness~"

…

Li Ye listened for a long time and understood many truths.

The Monkey King was trapped under the Five Elements Mountain, and it was not easy. Not only did he suffer from illusions every day, but he also had to endure the transformation of Buddhist scriptures - it is very likely that he really transformed from a wild monkey into a man who devoted himself to the Buddha.

Fight against the Buddha.

The monkey's nature is to be unruly and unruly and refuse to obey anyone, but at this moment, it was tortured to the point of losing its wild nature.

What's even more sad is that even the former lovers and brothers have to be forgotten one by one...

The curses revealed extreme anger and unwillingness, but more importantly, they were desolate and helpless.

Li Ye felt extremely uncomfortable after hearing this.

He showed his body, looked at the monkey, and said: "I want to accept you as my disciple, what do you think?"

The monkey stopped cursing all of a sudden. Its face was covered with hair, and it looked skinny and haggard.

However, the way it looked at Li Ye was sharp: "Tathagata, you have changed into a bad guy again. Do you still want to deceive me? I don't want to be your apprentice anymore!"

Li Ye was stunned for a moment and asked: "What do you mean? When did you become a disciple of Tathagata?"

The monkey stuck out his head and yelled: "Tathagata, stop being hypocritical! Back then, you were the one who transformed into the Bodhi Patriarch, taught me the magical powers and the seventy-two transformations, and instigated me to cause trouble in the underworld and heaven. Now, you will

I was pressed under the Five Elements Mountain, and I was extremely despicable and shameless."

"..." Li Ye was speechless for a while. Is what the monkey said true?

He thought about it carefully and thought it was really possible.

At this time, the monkey said harshly: "Tathagata, don't you stop acting? You enlightened under Bodhi, so you call yourself Patriarch Bodhi. Your spiritual mountain is Patriarch Bodhi's Lingtai Mountain. You..."

Li Ye fell into deep thought. What the monkey said was indeed very close to the truth:

The most important point is that Bodhi Patriarch and Tathagata are both people from Hezhou, Xiniu. So, Bodhi Patriarch’s territory overlaps with Tathagata’s territory – obviously, this is very unreasonable.

Moreover, Bodhi is not a hermit. He has many disciples and is very powerful. As the saying goes, one mountain cannot tolerate two tigers - can Tathagata allow this guy to threaten his existence in his territory?

Also, when the monkey came to learn, Bodhi only taught him his skills, but not how to behave - knowing that the monkey would cause trouble, you still taught him his skills?

Before the monkey left, he also warned the monkey: If he spoke out, he would be destroyed. Such a great god would be gone if he said no.

In addition, the appearance of Tathagata has a tail but no head, which is enough to show that there is an inextricable relationship between Tathagata and Bodhi.

The corner of Li Ye's mouth curled up slightly with a sneer: "Tathagata, Tathagata, you really have a good plan. Even I have figured it out."

Five hundred years!

Why do monkeys always talk about "five hundred years ago, there was a havoc in heaven" on the way to seek Buddhist scriptures?

There is only one reason. Five hundred years ago, the person who really caused trouble in the Heavenly Palace was himself, not the monkeys.

Li Ye knew very well that he was the one who really caused trouble in heaven! The monkeys were only making small troubles at best.

The Tathagata has only one purpose, which is to create momentum and borrow prestige - to use his prestige to cause trouble in the heavenly palace, to create momentum for monkeys, to create momentum for Buddhism, and to frighten all monsters.

"I'll show up again tomorrow, and I hope you'll change your mind by then."

After saying a few words, Li Ye walked out of Five Elements Mountain.

He did not force the monkey, but wanted to let nature take its course.

…

"By the way, the Seventh Fairy must have married a mortal and had children?"

Li Ye was a little bored after staying away from the Five Elements Mountain. He suddenly thought about the Seven Fairies. At that time, he ordered the Jade Emperor to knock the Seven Fairies down to earth...

His eyes instantly penetrated the illusion, and all the fog was invisible before his eyes.

"Humph, I didn't expect that the Jade Emperor would dare to deceive me and not take me seriously. How brave he is!"

After seeing through everything at a glance, Li Ye was furious.

His body disappeared instantly...

On the thirty-third heaven, in the Lingxiao Palace, the Jade Emperor sat high on his head, looking majestically at the immortals below.

At this time, Taishang Laojun took a step forward and said: "Jade Emperor, the nine-turn golden elixir that the old man has refined is about to be released. Please allow me to leave first."

The Jade Emperor smiled and said: "That's the case, so I'll go ahead." Upon hearing this, the Supreme Master immediately left the Lingxiao Palace.

"You pretentious person, I haven't seen you in five hundred years, do you still remember me?"

A medium-sized voice came from the Jade Emperor's head, making him tremble with fear.

The Jade Emperor's face was as white as paper and his lips were trembling. Just as he was about to say something, a foot fell from the sky and stepped directly on his face, trampling him directly from the dragon couch to the ground.

The owner of this foot was Li Ye. He stepped on the Jade Emperor's head on the ground, sat on the dragon couch with his butt, and looked down at the Jade Emperor: "Five hundred years ago, you promised me to knock down the seven fairies from the mortal world and marry him.

A mortal who herds cattle?”

Although the Jade Emperor felt humiliated at this moment, he still did not dare not answer: "Fellow Taoist, I did follow your instructions and let the seven fairies marry mortals."

"Really, you think I don't know?"

Li Ye sneered: "You asked an ordinary fairy to pretend to be the Seventh Fairy. After you went to the lower world, you married not a man who herded cattle, but a man named Dong Yong, and you lived a happy life."

He stretched out his hand to grasp, and a couple appeared in front of him, it was the Seven Fairies and Dong Yong.

When the two of them saw the Jade Emperor having his head stepped on by Li Ye, they were both frightened. The man suddenly stood in front of the woman and said tremblingly: "Don't, don't hurt my wife."

Li Ye smiled and waved gently, and the couple was sent back by him. He stretched out his hand to grab them again, and a woman appeared in front of him.

The woman was wearing simple clothes, but she still couldn't hide the arrogance in her eyes.

When her eyes moved, she saw the Jade Emperor being stepped on the head by Li Ye, and was completely stunned. Immediately, her eyes showed shock, anger and resentment, but she did not dare to show off.

"Are you really just an ordinary Weaver Girl?"

Li Ye sneered, and his voice was cold: "You are willing to be a weaver girl, and I have no objection. But you still have to go down to the lower world and marry a mortal who herds cattle."

The woman's face turned pale: "My princess, will I be able to escape this disaster after all?"

"Jade Emperor, you should know what to do this time?" Li Ye kicked the Jade Emperor into the center of the palace like a dead dog.

He stretched out his hand to grab it again, and a big green bull as strong as a hill appeared. It stared at Li Ye with bull eyes: "Brother-in-law, where is my sister? Why haven't you seen her?"

Li Ye laughed and said: "Brother-in-law, I have to ask you something now..." As he said that, Li Ye stated his purpose, hoping that Qing Niu could protect the mortal man who was herding cattle.

"Haha, brother-in-law, don't worry, leave everything to me, Lao Niu."

The green cow laughed loudly, its eyes as wide as copper bells, and looked at the seven fairies with a joking expression: "The union of the Cowherd on earth and the Weaver Girl in the sky is really fun, and it will probably become an immortal story."

"

…

(The seventh day of the seventh lunar month is Chinese Valentine’s Day. I wish all my brothers and sisters that lovers will eventually get married!)

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