Hong Kong variety show starting from zombies

"This is your ID."

Uncle Feng handed Xiao Zhang an ID. The photo and name on it were correct, and the date of birth was February 2, 1972.

"Isn't he too young?"

Although Xiao Zhang does not admit that he is over ninety years old, he does not think that he is only 18 years old this year. Although Xiaoxianrou is good, he is too passive. He prefers to be a mature uncle.

"Look at yourself in the mirror. Would anyone believe you when you say you are 28?"

"that's true."

Xiao Zhang did not become older because of his 70 years of sleep. Instead, his skin became fairer and firmer, so he looked younger than when he died.

"What's going on with this photo?"

Although the photo on the ID card is of him, it is a little darker than he is now. He was quite fair before. He had never seen this photo before and had no idea when he took it.

"Your photo."

"???"

"Photos placed on top of the mourning hall."

"I know what a suicide note means, but why do I have one?"

From Xiao Zhang's point of view, although there were cameras at the time of his death, people usually only have spiritual tablets after death.

"Ms. Ren asked someone to take the photo for you. She studied abroad." Uncle Feng explained and then said: "But I heard that computers are now being advocated for office work. There are also computer ID cards. You can get it yourself in the future. . Well... computers are... I can't say, you can learn it yourself in the future."

Oh, Uncle Feng, you don’t even know how to use computers?

Fortunately, I understand this quite well.

Having an ID card is very important to Xiao Zhang, not just because Xiangjiang has implemented an arrest-and-release policy since October 1980, stipulating that all Xiangjiang residents over the age of 15 must carry their ID cards in public places. Violators You will be fined HK$100.

A fine is a small matter, and it is a small matter to arrest him if he is found to have a problem with his identity, but if he is sent back, it will be a big problem.

After all, after the founding of the People's Republic of China, spirits were not allowed, and zombies were not allowed.

Uncle Feng gave Xiao Zhang his ID card. The most important thing to him was that it showed Uncle Feng's attitude.

"Then I'm going out to find a job."

Xiao Zhang has been staying at Uncle Feng's house for several days. On the surface, he pretends to understand this era, but in fact he is being a big eater.

Uncle Feng was unwilling to teach him how to practice zombies, fearing that he would become too strong and unable to suppress him.

He also didn't know that due to an unknown mutation, he didn't need to eat at all. The essence of the sun and moon and the spiritual energy of heaven and earth absorbed by his body were completely sufficient for normal consumption.

So Xiao Zhang can pretend that he is very hungry and is hungry 24 hours a day.

Eat when you are hungry.

Uncle Feng would definitely not be willing to give normal food to zombies, nor would he be willing to let Xiao Zhang go out to hunt.

So in the past few days, Uncle Feng's already small savings balance has been reduced by one digit, and even the supplies on the small island of Dongpingzhou suddenly feel a little scarce.

If things go on like this, it won't take too long before Uncle Feng will be in debt.

So the question is, should we choose to go into debt, or should we choose to let Xiao Zhang go out to find a job?

Uncle Feng was caught in a dilemma.

"It's really not my fault, Uncle Feng. You have to know that it is human nature to eat when you are hungry. Even if I become a zombie, I am still a human being in essence."

"I don't want to eat people, I don't want to drink human blood, and I don't want to suck people's souls, because essentially, I am very sure that I am a human being. How can humans eat humans?"

When Uncle Feng heard this, his eyes looked a little strange and he said, "Humans can eat people, let alone zombies?"

There is a story.

But Xiao Zhang didn't ask and continued to defend himself.

"I definitely won't eat people, so I need to work to earn money to support myself, and by the way, I can also support you in your old age."

"Speaking of which, how much is your monthly salary? Is it enough for you to spend on yourself? Do you have a pension in the future?"

"You are still single at such an old age... I know you want to practice Taoism, but you have already cultivated to your level. If you don't survive the thunder tribulation in seven or eight years, is it because you took advantage of these seven or eight years? If you have time to find a partner, you can barely have enough time to have five or six children."

"When you get married, a house, a car, and a betrothal gift are the most basic things. I heard on the radio that housing prices in Xiangjiang are very expensive. You can't let her live on this island with you, right? Even if she is willing, your children will I don’t want to.”

"Think about your future children. Can they receive a good education on this small island? Can they see the big world? They want to live in the city. If you don't leave them enough inheritance, will their lives be ruined? Will it be very hard?”

Uncle Feng stared at Xiao Zhang and corrected: "I didn't say that my crisis in seven or eight years will be to overcome the thunder tribulation. With my merits of subduing demons and demons for more than a hundred years, the thunder tribulation will be easy."

Xiao Zhang asked curiously: "What exactly is that calamity?"

Uncle Feng pondered slightly.

"Let's talk about you going out to work. What are you going to do?"

Relented.

Xiao Zhang became energetic and began to think about the future.

"Uncle Feng, you know who I am. I remember when I first arrived in your town, I was poor and had nothing, but within a few months...well, don't mention the past anymore."

"When I was listening to the radio, I got news that Bao Longnv, the eldest granddaughter of Bao Xinglong, one of the top ten richest men in Hong Kong, had just returned from studying in Eagle Country and joined Bao Xinglong's Global Shipping Company. She said that she would start from the grassroots level. . Although no reporter took photos of Bao Longnu, gossip news also said that she joined the company under a pseudonym."

"But Uncle Feng, you know my abilities. I have a sharp eye. Back then, I could tell at a glance that the weak woman bullied by the gangsters was Mr. Ren's daughter, Miss Ren... Ahem, I I didn’t actually know it at the time, I just wanted a hero to save the beauty.”

"There is a saying that goes well, if you bloom, the breeze will come."

"I applied for a job at Global Shipping Company, and then I showed my talent in business. I succeeded step by step and started my career as a son-in-law again."

"When the time comes, Uncle Feng, even if you want to get a third or fifth house, or you want to have a better career as a police officer, I can help you. As my father-in-law, I will protect you Uncle, if you become a police commissioner, is that a big deal?"

After hearing this, Uncle Feng had the urge to draw a talisman immediately, the five-thunder talisman.

But he couldn't help but explain: "I am a uniformed policeman in Dongpingzhou just to wait for you. Do you really think that I, Xiao Feng, am just an ordinary uniformed policeman?"

"Xiao Feng?"

Xiao Zhang was shocked. It turned out that Uncle Feng's wind was Qiao Feng's peak?

"Isn't it because of you? If I don't change my name, how can I say you are my nephew?"

Oh, it's not Xiao Feng, that's good.

"But, Uncle Feng, you can definitely change my name."

"You want to change your name? Haha... This is your disaster, and you can't run away."

"Hey, hey, tell me clearly, what trouble am I in?"

"If you follow your fantasy, you will definitely be in trouble and die."

"That's it? Can you make it more clear?"

"No, you can't become a son-in-law either." Uncle Feng's tone became firm and he said, "I will arrange a job for you. Just wait a few more days and then report it honestly."

Xiao Zhang asked helplessly: "What kind of job is it? You should be able to tell me this, right?"

"Be like me, be a policeman." Uncle Feng smoothed his police uniform.

"No, sir." Xiao Zhang was shocked: "I'm a zombie, and you want me to be a policeman?"

"As a Taoist priest from Maoshan, am I not also a policeman?"

"You, a Taoist priest from Maoshan, can be called an exorcist policeman when you are a policeman. If I am a zombie and become a policeman, what am I? A demonic policeman?"

Xiao Zhang was unwilling because the salary was too low and he could not do business.

With his thirty-year perspective, it may be difficult for the world's richest man to start his own business without becoming a son-in-law, but there is absolutely no problem for the world's richest man.

Moreover, when a police officer acts, there is supervision and he cannot do whatever he wants.

"Uncle Feng, if the devil police can also be considered a police officer, then does single pressure also count as pressure?"

Uncle Feng didn't care whether the single pressure was single pressure or not. He said with a cold face: "Either you listen to me and be a good person, or I will kill the demons in advance. It's your choice."

Don't give me a choice?

Xiao Zhang sneered in his heart.

One day, as the chief of Hong Kong police, I will stand in front of you, a uniformed exorcist policeman, and say this to you - it's your choice, Sir.