I am Vardy

Vardy was so close during the sliding shovel, there was no time to react!

When I saw the ball coming towards my head, I couldn't dodge it any more!

Boom!

Although it wasn't a loud noise, everyone around could hear it clearly, and it was still so clearly audible amidst the exclamations of the fans in the audience.

Vardy's eyes are full of golden stars, shining golden, as if he has arrived in the world of bliss.

Do you want to be so miserable?

It's okay to get headshot by the opponent's goalkeeper, but now you two are coming too?

And it's still working together!

President, why are you passing the ball so hard?

And throwing you, fat man, you can't hit such a ball, you can't throw a chicken, the most important thing is, even if you turn a corner, it will blow my head off, right?

Vardy felt the deep malice of the world towards him, and he really couldn't love him!

Lying on the lawn and looking at the sky, Vardy didn't want to get up, never want to get up again!

Get up again and be headshot!

I'll just lie here, if I have the ability, you guys will explode too!

But before Vardy could play tricks, Rooney rushed over and held Vardy down, his big excited face approached, as if to eat Vardy.

go away!

I haven't settled with you yet!

"You are amazing today!" Rooney looked as if he could climax at any time!

Vardy rolled his eyes, isn't he going to become a god today, he was headshot twice!

"You may really be the first guy in history to score two goals with his face in a game, but I don't know if the goal is my assist or Cristiano's!" Rooney seemed to be talking to himself.

Vardy froze again.

What's the meaning?

Score two goals with your face?

Turn around and look,

The Villarreal goalkeeper squatted on the ground like a lost dog, and in the goal, there was a ball lying quietly.

What the hell did I score again?

Or do you use your face?

At this moment, Vardy didn't want to celebrate, but wanted to cover his face and cry!

But he found that his face was so swollen that he couldn't cover it with his hands!

After the fans in the stands exclaimed, they didn't know how to express their feelings. Should they boo or applaud? It's so tangled!

Manchester United players rushed over, instead of stacking Arhats, they lined up to rub Vardy's face...

"You must cherish such a precious face!"

"Well, take good care of your face, your face can score more goals than your feet!"

"Actually, I found that your swollen face looks pretty good, at least it's more handsome than before!"

 …

Villarreal's players seem to be looking at God. If the two sides really fight with each other, they will have no complaints when they lose.

But it is not acceptable for everyone to be scored twice by Vardy with his face.

Although it seemed that Vardy's face was swollen, they felt that their face was even more swollen!

Manchester United won them in such a nonsense way, how can they go out to meet people in the future!

Ferguson didn't feel sorry for Vardy's face. He felt that Vardy was really a lucky general. goal.

Isn't this exactly what Manchester United needs?

Of course, Ferguson is also worried that Vardy will infect the whole Manchester United team. I am afraid that such a Manchester United team cannot be controlled even by himself!

After this goal, the game may come to an end. Villarreal fell behind by two goals and was demoralized by Vardy's face, unable to come back.

For the rest of the time, both sides are procrastinating, unanimously expecting the end of the game!

While rubbing his face, Vardy ran to a place where there were few people on the court. He was really scared!

He played football well and didn't try to tease him, but he couldn't stand the unexpected and took the initiative to come to him, which made him unbearable!

It sounds like you scored two goals with your face, which sounds great!

It can be explained in another way-that is, the face is bored twice!

Such a tragic thing happened to a person, I am afraid that this person will lose the purpose of life.

If you can't provoke me, you can't hide!

Vardy is really afraid of being kicked in the face by the ball again.

There is really no way to explain the accident. If it happens, it is inevitable!

The face is swollen, the target is bigger, Vardy is really afraid that he will be headshot again, so just stop playing!

In this way, the game is over, Vardy used two goals, um, two goals scored with his face, defeated Villarreal, helped Manchester United win, and won the first victory in the group stage.

These two face goals also gave fans countless topics.

"Valdy is really a great super shooter, every part of his body can score goals!"

"Following the birth of the most scoring hand, Vardy told everyone what is the most scoring face!"

"Valdy's face was hit twice in a row. Is this disfigurement or plastic surgery? Why do I think it looks more handsome when it is swollen?"

"In the past, it was Vardy who cheated others. Today, Vardy has been tricked so badly. The most important thing is that Rooney and Ronaldo have teamed up to give him a fatal blow. There is no one left!"

 …

In today's game, apart from Vardy, no one is the protagonist.

This guy eavesdropped on the opponent's tactics twice in a row, although he didn't understand anything!

He scored two shocking goals with his face, although he did not take the initiative in these two goals!

Ferguson felt that if the protagonist Vardy did not go to the post-match press conference, the reporters would definitely rebel, so Ferguson called Vardy and went to the press conference together.

Just sat down, before the coaches of the two teams spoke, the reporters had already thrown the question to Vardy.

"Excuse me, Mr. Vardy, do you speak Spanish?"

"For what purpose do you want to eavesdrop on the home team's tactical arrangements?"

"The face was stuffed twice, which one hurt more?"

"If you were given a choice, would you choose to score goals after being smothered, or not to score without being smothered?"

"May I ask you to become the first player in world football to score consecutive goals with your face. How do you feel?"

 …

Vardy rolled his eyes, my feeling is-MMP!

These unscrupulous reporters, aren't they adding salt to their own wounds!

asshole!

The press officer of Villarreal hurriedly stopped the frenzied reporters, and after a long while, the press conference got to the point.

Ferguson's speech was quite satisfactory, he praised the performance of the players and his opponent, nothing new.

But Huang Qian's coach Pellegrini doesn't have such a good temper.

"We have a chance to win this game. If it weren't for Riquelme's injury, if it wasn't for Vardy's two balls with his face, the winner must be our Villarreal. Unfortunately, Obviously the opponent is luckier than us, why can't we have a striker who can score goals with face!"

Vardy got shot, Fran got shot too!

Vardy really wants to tell Pei Gong that I will deal with you with just my face, and I haven't used my golden feet yet, otherwise you don't know how miserable you will lose!

Fran said that he was innocent, who else could score goals with his face except Vardy!

A concubine can't do it!

In the following questioning session, the reporters once again threw a flood of questions at Vardy, smashing Vardy's head.

"Please Mr. Vardy..."

"I refuse to answer that question!"

"Please Mr. Vardy..."

"I don't want to answer that question!"

"Please Mr. Vardy..."

"I don't want to answer that question!"

 …

All pass, as long as it is a question that stimulates yourself, Vardy will remain silent, what do you like!

At this time, a reporter stood up and asked Vardy with a smile: "Mr. Vardy, I have a question from a fan here, I hope you can answer it!"

Fan question?

Vardy nodded!

"A: Headshot by the goalkeeper, and then rebounded to score; B: Headshot to teammates, and then rebounded to score; C: After the header was scored, the car did not brake, and the head hit the goalpost; D: Got bored by the goalkeeper Go up, and rebound the goal! Please give your answer!"

"I refuse...well, I can answer this question!" Vardy pondered for a moment.

This question is a bit too foolish, the four options all make my crotch shocked, and each ending is very tragic!

However, choosing the lesser of the four evils, Vardy can choose one with less serious consequences!

The first two options are all from my personal experience in this game. Obviously, option B is not that serious. If you think about option C, it hurts even thinking about it. I am afraid it hurts more than being directly headshot by the opponent's goalkeeper!

As for option D, let's not talk about whether he can bounce back and score a goal after being bored. The pain alone must be unbearable. This is the rhythm of cutting off children and grandchildren!

So, the answer is already obvious!

"I choose B because I have experienced it myself. Although it hurts, at least I can bear it!"

Most of the reporters nodded. If they were given a choice, they might give this answer too!

But the reporter who asked the question stood up again, and said to Vardy with a strange expression: "Sorry, Mr. Vardy, this is not a multiple-choice question, but a sorting question!"

Get out of here!

Vardy can't wait to hit the microphone directly!

The reporters roared with laughter, and even Ferguson and Pei Gong couldn't help laughing, Vardy was played badly!

After a press conference, Vardy was tortured enough, he vowed that he would never come to such a cheating place again next time!

On the plane back to Manchester, Vardy closed his eyes and dozed off.

Although he contributed his handsome face in this game, at least the team won, which is the most important thing.

If Vardy's memory is not wrong, then Manchester United did not do much in the Champions League this season. After the group stage, they went home and were kicked to the UEFA Cup.

And now, an away victory over the most powerful opponent in the group is undoubtedly an important victory for Manchester United on the way out.

Vardy is here, I dare not say that he will lead Manchester United to win the championship directly, but at least it is necessary to qualify for the group. If the group does not qualify, then what difference does Vardy come or not?

Where is his value?