I will not die!

As the company's main profitable product suffered heavy losses due to competing products from large companies, the company's situation became precarious, and the whole thing was shrouded in a gloomy atmosphere. In this atmosphere, I also began to look for the next company's signature The message is coming.

However, what surprised me was that at this time, for the first time, two copies of my game were bought, and judging from the background data, both of them had finished it for a certain period of time, although they did not give an evaluation. But at least the fact that they never gave negative reviews shows that they are not particularly dissatisfied.

Put your own games aside for now, what is more important now is your future livelihood. Just a few days ago, I had interviews with several new companies, but all of them failed. They either complained that my working experience was short or that my school was poor. All the companies I applied for were rejected in the first round. I scrolled down and felt a bit of pressure for the first time in a long time. If I was fired from the company again at this time, I would be completely done.

But unfortunately, the boss really found me at this moment

"Well, you have been working in our company for more than two years."

The boss smiled. This hypocritical smile made me feel sick, but it wasn't to the point where I wanted to vomit.

"Um"

"What do you think of our company?"

"good"

"Haha... Is it just okay?"

What do you want to hear from me, rubbish? Very good?

Seeing that I didn't say anything, the boss asked again:"Do you have any plans to continue working in our company in the future?"

"Um"

"Hehe, that's good. As you know, the company has been in some difficulties recently. As for future wages, I will definitely pay them on time. That's the amount... it may be less. I hope you can wait patiently for a while and wait for the company's situation. It has gotten better, and I will make up for all the shortcomings when the time comes!"

I feel like vomiting.

Just say a salary cut, don't be so ambiguous.

What's the difference between the boss's statement that he can't guarantee whether it can be fulfilled, and a lie? Since there's no guarantee that it can be accomplished, don't say it easily.

I I hate lies so much, and I hate liars so much.

Why?

When my mother called again, the answer to the question was immediately self-evident. It was so disgusting.

It was like there was a blender in my stomach that was constantly stirring, trying to get everything. Spit out all the internal organs, blood, and filth.

I suppressed my nausea and listened to what my mother was going to say today. However, as soon as she opened her mouth, she immediately cursed me, scolding me so much. Unfilial, she is simply a white-eyed wolf. She would rather raise a dog than me. Although she has scolded me many times before, she has almost never heard it since I went to college. Now that I hear it again, I always feel a little bit... Unexpected.

During the whole process of her scolding me, I didn’t say a word and just listened quietly. Then maybe she was tired of scolding me, so she hung up the phone without saying a word. After a few minutes, my mobile phone It rang again, this time it was my father. Over the years, my mother has always called me. If my father wanted to say anything, he would always go through my mother’s phone. This was the first time that she took the initiative to call me on her own phone. Come over.

He told me the reason why my mother suddenly called me to scold me. It turned out that just yesterday, my mother suddenly fainted and was hospitalized. During the hospitalization, she always expected me to call back, but I didn’t, so I I saw the inexplicable scene just now.

I asked my father why my mother fainted, and he answered that it was cerebral thrombosis.

I hung up the phone and fell on the bed, feeling extremely calm. I hoped that I could not sleep anymore, just like before. One night.

Some time ago, I was plagued by diseases, such as rhinitis, pneumonia, enteritis, ophthalmitis, etc., and my mother felt that I was not pious enough, which was why I was suffering from this disease. Sickness. I have never been a person who can move forward courageously in the face of setbacks. Now I am even more faced with the embarrassing situation of being unable to see, breathe, and walk. In response to all the pain in my body, I naturally thought of giving up and giving up everything..So one night, I climbed up to the window sill alone, stretched my feet out of the window, and grabbed the window edge with one hand. I didn’t know what time it was at night, but I sat there for a long time and never saw anyone pass by. In fact, I I hoped that I could just wait for sleep to fall, and then fall to my death unknowingly, but the weather was already a bit cold at that time, and the cool wind kept blowing on my body, making my sleep always intermittent. , and because of those diseases, I couldn't stay in one position for a long time.

In the end, because the wind was too cold that night and I needed to get paper, I lay down on the bed again.

I don't know how I fell asleep. , but I really hope that I can't sleep.

I didn't wake up as I wished, but I lost something and gained something. They were originally from the same source, but they were divided into two somehow. Two completely different parts.

The next day, the noisy alarm clock tore my eyelids open, throwing the blocked morning sunlight into my eye sockets. The tears that wet my eyes flowed from the corners of my eyes to my temples, and finally entered my ear canal. My heart shattered the door of the dark world, and I heard it.

The sound of dreams being killed

……

Although my salary has been reduced, my daily life is still going on. Since my daily expenses are not much, the impact on my life is not big, but the impact on my work is quite big. Some people in the company have left. Now I have to do the work of several people by myself. I am extremely busy every day.

"The war has begun, even if we are shattered to pieces, we must survive!"

"Even if we are eaten, we still have to eat a piece of each other's flesh!"

Why don't you chew it yourself.

Similar words like this, the boss will say impassionedly almost every day, but it is useless except for being an eyesore. Instead of making bold words here, it is better to spit out all the money you have eaten as soon as possible.

The company's Performance was getting worse day by day, and more and more people were resigning, but my workload was increasing. Fortunately, after applying for all the basic game development positions in several nearby cities, good luck finally favored me. Ever since, I was ready to change jobs.

However, when I brought up the idea of ​​resigning, my boss exploded.

"Resign? Why did you resign? When you couldn't find an internship, it was the company that took you in. It was the company that gave you a job, money, and the capital to live on. It was the company that gave you everything!"

"Is this how you repay the company? What qualifications do you have to talk to me about resigning?"

These are not what he said directly, but subtext. Of course, I don't care even if he said it directly. The boss suddenly became so angry, probably because there were too many people who asked to leave before, and I happened to bump into it. I was at the gunpoint, so I received this scolding.

What a disgusting face.

I have always worked hard, never asked for leave, never been late, and never perfunctory. I have always worked hard not to cause trouble to my colleagues, but Why, why are you obviously just a decoration, obviously just rubbish, but you can't even treat yourself as rubbish... Don't you have any sense of shame?

If so, why don't you die.

If he dies, I should also die. Don't worry about these problems.

I looked around, especially the boss's desk, and noticed an ashtray full of cigarette butts, as well as unplugged pens, staplers, tape, pen holders, art ornaments, and desk lamps. , there are several bottles and cans in the display cabinet at the back. The table is made of hardwood, the floor is marble, and the soft-spoken thing in the whole room is a single sofa. The boss weighs about 80 kilograms. My weight was measured when I was in college. It's fifty-two kilograms. I'm wearing sneakers and he's wearing leather shoes. Mine is casual wear and his is a suit. The door to the room is closed. The distance from him is about five meters and the distance from me is about three meters. Half, the sound insulation effect is very good...

Perhaps noticing his gaffe, the boss suddenly corrected his tone and said:"I'm sorry, I'm a little confused right now. Can you please go out first? We'll talk about the resignation later."……"

Seeing him scratching his head in distress, I nodded and left without saying a word.

In the end, I resigned. After all, according to the law, he was not qualified to keep me. Before leaving, I heard that my boss actually owed a lot of debts outside the company. If the company went out of business, it would be almost impossible to repay his debts. I Of course I don't feel sorry for him, nor do I feel sorry for the company's decline. I just feel annoyed about the upcoming move.

I'm not a person who likes change, especially when my work and life suddenly change completely. But fortunately, I'm quite adaptable, and I almost got used to it after a few days.

The new company also develops monitor online games. It makes a medieval-style ARPG. The salary and benefits are similar to the current ones. However, the difference is that this time the boss is actually involved in the development work and is very capable. He is mainly responsible for the art part. Unlike the previous one who was an investor and knew nothing about game development.

In addition, it took about three years after I left before the original company completely collapsed, and the game was also shut down at that time.

A few days after I changed my job, my mother called me again, with the same content. I asked about her physical condition, and she replied that everything was fine. She also asked about my work status, and I also told her that I had changed my job. Got a new company, everything is fine so far

"Guangyuan, it’s about time you learn to find one, right?"

"Guangyuan, we have raised you so big, fed you, and clothed you, and we don’t ask you how much money you can make, but at least you should fulfill this requirement, right?"

"Guangyuan……"

"Guangyuan……"

"Guangyuan……"

"Guangyuan, you should know something, right?"

……

This time, my mother didn’t ask me if I would go back, although I felt it was almost time for me to go back. After all, I didn’t want the relationship to become too tense. I have been transferring money to my family regularly in the past, so I know that even if they don't go back, they will just be helpless or angry, but if this continues, it may turn into resentment. But unfortunately, there is really no way to go back this time. Just a few days before the Chinese New Year, I accidentally fell on my way home. My leg immediately became lame because I thought it was close to the hospital. I just wanted to walk there directly. I walked a few hundred meters with a limp for more than ten minutes. After I bought the medicine, I limped for more than ten minutes to go home. Finally, I caught a bad cold and my head was in my head for several days. They were all so dizzy that even walking was difficult.

Go back later.

Maybe will go back.

It's far away, time is short, there's nothing that needs to be done, and there's nothing that can be done.

It doesn't matter...

After I got used to working in the new company, I probably had some free time again, so I started working on my second game. I don’t know if it was because of the sudden death of the first game. Although I was more experienced, my enthusiasm for production was much lower, which led to the extension of the production cycle. It was originally expected to be completed in half a year, but in the end it took two years. In the past two years, I didn't spend all my time on making the second game. I also spent on optimizing the first game, such as the operating feel and game values.

Although the production time this time is significantly longer than expected, it is not without gains. At least the completion of the game is far better than before. Both the operating feel and the fineness of the art have been qualitatively improved than before. At least I think the quality is worth the price of a meal.

After the game was finished, I wanted to sell it directly, but then I suddenly thought about giving Yakumo a try. I haven’t contacted him for a long time. The last time I contacted him was when he paid me back, although he probably didn’t He would mind that it took me so long to come to him because of something, but I still feel a little uncomfortable.

In the end, I just released it. Anyway, whether he plays it or not, nothing will change.

Two weeks later, just like last time, sales were still zero.

Look, nothing has changed.

After doing nothing for more than half a year, the mysterious power that came from nowhere made me point my finger at the third game. This time, I wanted to make it big, using the action game production experience I learned in the new company. , to make a medium-sized adventure game that is different from the past.

Because of the increase in volume, my production process this time is also different from before. In the past, I simply wrote a flow chart and followed it, but this time I wrote a lot of planning before starting. , the content is far more detailed than before, and this time I plan to add some plot to it. The plot of the previous parkour game actually originated from a short story I wrote when I was a student, and it was even posted on social media at the time, although in the end it was not available. It was deleted after people saw it. But for this game production, I decided to write something again. In the end, it took more than a year to prepare my third game. However, just when I was about to officially start work, a phone call forced me to stop. my progress.

It was a drowsy middle of the night, and I was about to lose all awareness of the world. A clear ringtone pulled me back from the border between the two sides of the Taiwan Strait, and my sleepiness completely disappeared. I endured my anger and clicked the call without even looking at who it was, because I knew that no one would call me at this time, not even for advertising.

There is a familiar voice on the other end of the phone

"are you coming back"

"Not sure"

"Your mother is gone."