I’m Really a Superstar

on tv.

Yao Jiancai stupidly stopped his bicycle and walked over: "Huh? What's going on? Who wants to kidnap and traffic you?"

Dong Shanshan said stupidly: "No, he was abducted."

Yao Jiancai looked at him, "Are you going to kidnap someone?"

Audience: "Hahahaha!"

Zhang Ye glanced at him and said, "What are you looking at, kidnapping? I can kidnap like this? You buy it!"

Dong Shanshan is a bit ugly now!

Audience: "Hahahahaha!"

Yao Jiancai spoke with a northeastern accent: "Hey, what's going on with you guys?"

Dong Shanshan laughed: "We are a couple, just playing here!"

Zhang Ye also laughed: "Hehehe, there is nothing to play with!"

Yao Jiancai said to the camera: "These two are selling their wives for fun during the Chinese New Year?"

…

Backstage.

A staff member came running.

"Leader! The number of viewers has exploded!"

"What? How much?"

"We can't count it yet!"

"Then how do you know?"

"It was revealed by the staff who compiled the ratings! They said that after Director Zhang's skit started, the number of viewers skyrocketed! It went crazy!"

"Okay! Okay! Okay!"

"Zhang Ye still has great appeal!"

"Come on, Director Zhang! Let's see how much we can achieve!"

"Are we going to break the record this time?"

"It all depends on how the skit is performed!"

…

The skit continues.

Yao Jiancai has been successfully fooled by Zhang Ye.

Zhang Ye smiled and said: "In the recent period, I feel like I haven't felt any part of your body. It's different from the past. Think about it, think hard!"

Yao Jiancai touched his head: "I didn't feel it. I just felt that my face was getting bigger and bigger?"

Audience: "Hahahaha!"

Zhang Ye snapped his fingers: "By the way, this is not the main symptom! Do you know why your face is big? It's because the necrosis of your peripheral nerves has enlarged the top part of your face."

Yao Jiancai was stunned: "Where did you hold it in?"

Zhang Ye pointed: "Below the waist, feet up!"

Yao Jiancai: "Legs?"

Zhang Ye: "The enemy!"

Yao Jiancai shook his head: "No, there's nothing wrong with my legs!"

Zhang Ye rolled his eyes, pointed at him and shouted loudly: "Take two steps! Take two steps! It's okay, take two steps! Let's go!"

audience:

"Ha ha ha ha!"

"Oh, Zhang Ye, I owe you so much!"

"He is wicked!"

Yao Jiancai was also frightened, and his movements were very stiff: "Okay, take two steps, go, take two steps, take two steps, just take two steps."

Zhang Ye: "Stop! Is there anything wrong with your shoes? One heel is high and the other is low?"

Yao Jiancai: "These are travel shoes, they follow the ground!"

Zhang Ye: "My enemy, your legs are sick and one leg is short! Let me adjust it for you. Believe it or not, your legs will be raised as high as I can with my hands, and then down. Fall hard, okay? Believe it or not? My leg is definitely sick, my right leg is short! Come on, get up!"

Dong Shanshan looked on curiously.

Yao Jiancai raised his leg nervously!

Zhang Ye lowered his hand hard!

Yao Jiancai also settled heavily!

Lift your feet!

Settlement!

Lift your feet!

Settlement!

Finally, Zhang Ye pointed at him: "Stop! Is he numb?"

Yao Jiancai was shocked: "I'm numb!"

Dong Shanshan quickly pulled Zhang Ye over and asked in surprise: "Hey, why is he numb?"

Zhang Ye rolled his eyes: "Nonsense, even if you stamp on it, you'll be numb!"

…

The audience immediately sprayed!

"Hahahahahaha!"

"Ouch, I can't do it!"

"This is a scam!"

"Old Yao was tricked again!"

"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

"You feel numb even if you stamp on it? This word is so classic that I'm confused!"

…

Zhang Ye: "Let's go, let's go! Don't control it, your legs are 100% diseased, don't control it, relax! Go! Go, go, go! Go, go! Go, don't think about it, will you follow me? Start walking, one by one Just click and let’s go.”

Yao Jiancai staggered behind Zhang Ye.

The further we go, the more we go crooked, the more we go, the more we go, "Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh my god!"

Zhang Ye smiled and said, "Yes, let's go!"

Dong Shanshan said in surprise: "My good leg was deceived into lameness!"

Yao Jiancai turned around: "What did you say?"

Zhang Ye chuckled: "Did you see it? My wife has noticed it. She said you were lying and you are lame."

Yao Jiancai almost cried, "Old girl, why didn't you show up so early?"

Dong Shanshan smiled: "That's because you haven't met him a long time ago. If you had met him, he would have been lame!"

…

Grandma’s house.

The third sister is already laughing!

The second sister squatted on the ground, holding her stomach and laughing!

The whole family is jumping up and down!

"It's so funny!"

"Xiao Ye is so bad!"

"What do you think?"

"Hahahahaha!"

…

The sketch is getting better and better.

The audience’s laughter never stopped!

Yao Jiancai: "On crutches?"

Zhang Ye: "Please sit down. After you put on the crutches, your legs will gradually become balanced, and it will get better little by little. At first, when an old man saw that I had a disease in my legs, she felt sorry for the money and refused to give it to me. I saw a doctor, and in the end, I was disabled." He patted his leg and said, "There are steel plates inside, so I can't bend it back."

Yao Jiancai was surprised: "Is this a useless leg?"

Dong Shanshan: "These are good legs."

Zhang Ye snorted: "What are you talking about! Who has good legs and can use crutches?"

Yao Jiancai: "Yes."

Dong Shanshan interrupted: "Isn't that guai——"

Yao Jiancai was angry, "Oh, I'm talking about you, big girl! Can you stop messing around all the time? This is a discussion between patients about their condition, what are you doing all the time!"

Dong Shanshan is furious!

…

Backstage.

Some actors gathered around to watch the Spring Festival Gala after their performances.

For example, Zhang Yuanqi.

For example, Chen Guang and Fan Wenli.

For example, people from Ci Xiufang’s team.

At this moment, they were all laughing!

"Hahahahaha!"

"My tears!"

"It can't be done, it can't be done!"

"I'm going to die laughing!"

…

on the screen.

Yao Jiancai: "Then where should I buy abduction?"

Dong Shanshan said: "Isn't that right? I just want to sell you this abduction."

However, Zhang Ye was annoyed: "What are you talking about? Come over! What are you selling? What can I do with a crutch after the sale? Why are you like this? If a woman picks it up, won't it be over if she gives it to him?"

Yao Jiancai: "No!"

Dong Shanshan was stunned: "You won't sell it?"

Zhang Ye held the crutch together: "Take the crutch!"

Yao Jiancai said excitedly: "Ah, brother, oh brother, I can't ask for it for free, I have to give you money."

Zhang Ye smacked his lips and said, "I know your character. If a woman wants money, you won't give it to her. If you want face, if I don't want it, it means looking down on you, right? I still have to ask for it. I'll give you half, a hundred." "

Yao Jiancai immediately said: "Hey, okay, okay."

Zhang Ye smiled and said: "I told you to be more anxious with me!"

Yao Jiancai took out the money and rummaged through it for a long time: "Hey, brother, what's that? I only have thirty-two yuan for the two of them."

Dong Shanshan took it and sighed: "Then take it, as much as you want is more."

But this time.

Zhang Ye's eyes suddenly widened: "What kind of bicycle do you want?" He shouted at the top of his voice: "What kind of bicycle do you want?"

Audience: "Hahahahaha!"

Yao Jiancai slapped his forehead and hurried to push the cart, "Oh, yes, yes!"

Zhang Ye glared at Dong Shanshan and said, "Why are you acting like this?"

Dong Shanshan cried angrily: "I didn't say I wanted a bicycle? You said you wanted a bicycle!"

…

audience:

"Hahahahahaha!"

"You made me laugh so hard!"

"This is so funny!"

"What kind of bicycle do you want? Hahahaha!"

"It's so classic!"

…

The old Wu family.

Li Qinqin laughed while wiping Le Le's tears!

Wu Mo had already stopped laughing and was breathing back his breath!

"I fainted from laughter!"

"Why are you so funny!"

"What did they say about bicycles?"

…

on tv.

Zhang Ye said angrily: "What a joke, I can't control this wife, so she just asks someone for a bicycle!"

Dong Shanshan said angrily: “I didn’t say I wanted a bicycle!”

Yao Jiancai said quickly: "Brother, don't be angry all the time. I think what my eldest sister said is reasonable. You said that with my legs and feet, I can basically say goodbye to bicycles!"

Another classic line!

The whole audience burst into laughter!

The laughter almost overturned the ceiling of Studio No. 1!

Dong Shanshan was so angry that she grabbed the car: "No! You can't ask for someone else's bicycle!" She pushed the car into Yao Jiancai's hand, "Hurry up and take it back, push it back, you don't know he is trying to trick you. !”

Yao Jiancai also said angrily: "You're trying to trick me! Why are you doing this? I'm confused. How come there is such a big gap between the two people who live together?"

Dong Shanshan: “…”

Zhang Ye smiled: "Brother, use the crutch!"

Yao Jiancai said gratefully: "Brother, it's fate!"

…

The audience laughed!

"Hahahahaha!"

"Old Yao, you idiot!"

"Zhang Ye is missing his virtue!"

"It amused me to death!"

"Ouch, I can't breathe!"

"I've never seen such a funny sketch before!"

…

End of skit.

This last collection is also stunning!

Zhang Ye pushed the bicycle he had received and said to his wife: "What are you looking at? Why are you still feeling distressed? Let's go and change places!"

Dong Shanshan said, "What else are you going to do?"

Zhang Ye kicked the bike and smiled slightly: "Find someone with bad legs and sell the bike to him!"

The skit is over!

At this moment, the whole place was excited!

At this moment, Chinese people all over the world are excited!

The applause suddenly exploded like thunder!

applause!

Scream!

Shout!

One after another!

…

In front of the TV.

Tang Dazhang's face turned blue!

How can it be!

How can this be!

Suppressed!

This shaft was actually pressed by Zhang Ye!

There were many people in the cross talk community who were waiting to see Zhang Ye's joke, and they were completely silent at the moment!

…

Grandma’s house.

The three sisters were all hoarse from shouting!

"That's awesome!"

"My brother is so awesome!"

"This sketch is amazing! It's amazing!"

…

Director Li Ke.

"What a great performance!"

"The sketch book is better!"

"These three people are a perfect match!"

"Yes, they have such a tacit understanding. This skit is simply amazing!"

…

on Weibo.

"The trump card!"

"Yes, it turns out that the killer weapon is here!"

"At first I thought the previous cross talk skits were already outrageous, and I was still trying to figure out how Zhang Ye could beat the bottom, but I didn't expect it! There really is no one else here!"

"This is the funniest sketch I've ever seen!"

"Ditto!"

"I laughed from beginning to end!"

"Me too, my stomach hurts from laughing!"

"marvelous!"

"Well, it's really great!"

"It looks so good that I cried!"

“I can’t believe how good it is!”

"Zhang Ye really used all his special skills for this year's Spring Festival Gala!"

"This is a fucking skit! This is a fucking Spring Festival Gala!"

At this moment, everyone in front of the TV had a momentary illusion!

——The Spring Festival Gala is back!

The Spring Festival Gala that made people fall in love so much back then is finally back after many years! ! (To be continued.) 8 For more exciting novels, welcome to visit our reading academy