A Pirate's Bizarre Adventure

academic issues.

It is indeed an academic issue.

Purer than the Tianshan Snow Lotus.

In this regard, Jon said: It's really boring.

…

…

The next few days.

The days suddenly calmed down.

Those who should go to school go to school, and those who should go to work go to work.

However, Jon, who stayed at home every day, was not clean. From time to time, several mysterious people in black suits and sunglasses came over.

Those people are not the same group.

An unexpected encounter between the two parties can also lead to verbal conflicts.

Not only did Jon not stop him, but he encouraged him: "Let's fight, let's fight."

It's a pity that the agents are all shameless, and they are sarcastic, but they are unwilling to take action.

Jon thought that such a peaceful life would last until the next apostle came.

As a result, one night, Asuka suddenly came to the door.

The girl looked angry and broke into Jon's room without saying a word.

Qiao was stunned for a moment, pretending to cover his eyes, and blinked again and again through his fingers: "Teacher Xiang, don't be like this, Teacher Xiang..."

"Tell me, what's wrong with me?" Asuka asked loudly.

She didn't know whether she was asking Jon or herself.

Jon couldn't hide his disappointment: "Aren't you going to take it off?"

Asuka:? ? ?

Jon laughed dryly: "I'm not really looking forward to that. Besides, you're really pretending."

Asuka:? ? ? ? ? ?

When I typed this question mark, it was not that I had a problem, but that you had a problem.

Jon performed a Sichuan Opera face change on the spot and quickly returned to his usual appearance: "Okay, no more joking. So the content of your 'life talk' is the exploration of self-worth?"

Asuka pulled up a chair, crossed her arms, crossed her legs, and sat across from Jon: "Come, evaluate me."

"First, normal people would not call themselves 'Miss'. Second, your movements were too big, and I saw the pink bow. Third, as expected of a foreigner, your stupid hair is actually yellow."

Jon still looks like a life coach, but that's the thing, no matter how you listen to it, it doesn't sound too interesting.

Asuka blushed all of a sudden, and most of the anger in her heart was extinguished, and she shouted: "You are harassing me! Do you know?"

"Haha, then you call the police and arrest me." Jon curled his lips: "Come on, let the iron fist of justice fall on me."

Asuka couldn't help it anymore and punched hard: "Rogue, accept the punishment."

Jon was beaten a little, and he said calmly: "Too weak, too weak. A player like you can't even enter the preliminary round in the world's best martial arts tournament."

"Who wants to go! Participate! That! Inexplicable! Martial arts meeting!" Asuka punched one after another.

Needless to say, he was indeed trained, and his physical strength was much stronger than that of ordinary people.

Jon sat there and let her play for three or four minutes, which made Asuka panting from exhaustion.

The old gangster glanced at him and said disdainfully: "You don't even have the strength to hit anyone, and you still claim to be a driver? Go home and raise pigs."

Asuka:......

Feeling wronged, uncomfortable, and wanting to cry.

In fact, she cried.

Tears burst into tears.

"They all bully me, they all bully me, ah!!!"

Red Screaming Chicken, a classic replica.

With quick eyesight and quick hands, Jon covered Asuka's mouth: "Speak what you say, don't yell randomly, even if there are no neighbors around, you have to consider the impact."

Asuka: "Uh-huh!"

She tries to bite Jon's hand.

Then my lips felt hot.

Jon let go of his hand and didn't look embarrassed at all: "I have the ability to predict the future a little bit, so the second before you bit me, I generated some capsaicin on my hand."

Asuka's lips were swollen.

It's better now, I'm not angry or aggrieved, only hurt.

"Don't you see that you are too depressed, do you want to comfort you?" Jon shook his head gently, and a green light fell on Asuka, instantly healing all the girl's injuries and eliminating the thick lips like sausages.

Asuka was stunned for two seconds, then sat back on the chair - sitting very dignifiedly, with her legs tightly together.

Jon pushed up the non-existent glasses on the bridge of his nose: "So, let's continue the topic. The content of the life conversation is 'the exploration of self-worth', right?"

Asuka opened her mouth, not knowing what to say.

In the end, I actually laughed.

Then she understood that people really laugh out loud when they are extremely speechless.

Jon stopped joking, and spoke in a sincere tone: "I know you are a person who longs for recognition from others. The shadow of your childhood is locked in your heart, but it cannot be dissipated. As long as there are incentives, it will be doubled. Hurt you. That’s why I face you with that indifferent attitude, can you understand?”

Hearing this, Asuka's expression changed slightly: "So that's it..."

"Part of it is, and part of it is, it's really fun to watch you scream when you break the defense." Jon chuckled.

Asuka: I thought about it, but I was autistic again.

"Okay, okay, let's talk about your troubles. I don't guarantee that I can solve them, but I can guarantee that I can use other troubles to suppress your original troubles. Isn't this a kind of psychological therapy? Hey, as expected of me." As he spoke, Jon gave himself a thumbs up.

Asuka deliberately turned her head: "No, it's nothing."

"Look, you're being stubborn again, aren't you?" Jon narrowed his eyes and touched his smooth chin: "Let me guess, you must have a crush on the men around you, like me, but because of the disparity in status and strength, you've fallen into a deep inferiority complex."

"Huh?" Asuka's voice suddenly rose eight degrees: "Who would have a crush on an alien like you?"

"If you say so, then I'll show you my tentacles." Jon's expression remained unchanged: "Have you seen it? It's that classic cartoon about a magical girl fighting an alien creature."

A big question mark appeared above Asuka's head.

Is the cartoon you're talking about serious?

Okay.

I don't think it's anything serious.

Asuka sighed: "I... I don't know how to say it... I just feel quite unhappy recently... Especially when I see that stupid Shinji..."

Jon snapped his fingers: "Isn't this simple? You are in love."

Asuka was instantly upset: "Huh? How could I be in love? I want to be the strongest pilot and be the center of attention..."

She couldn't continue talking.

Jon shrugged: "It's understandable for a girl of your age to have some thoughts in this regard, and the only person of your age around you is Shinji. It's normal for you to have a crush on him."

Asuka was not convinced and retorted: "There are many male classmates in my class."

Jon said with a smile: "Let me touch your chest, ask yourself, do you look down on those ordinary boys?"

Asuka stopped talking.

The answer is obviously no.

Those dull and wretched boys are not even as good as this unreliable alien in front of him.

Wait.

How did I unknowingly add the guy opposite to my dating list? Cross it out, cross it out quickly!

Jon spread his hands: "You see, it's that simple. I think you must have been ignored by Shinji, so... Of course, it may also be because of the relationship between Rei and Shinji that makes you feel jealous.

But you can rest assured, Shinji is the kind of coward. After confirming the relationship, he seems a little distant. You may have a great chance if you confess."

"Who wants to confess!" Asuka said angrily: "I don't like that guy."

"Here we go again~ dead tsundere." Jon raised his eyebrows: "If the repressed emotions cannot be released, they will fall into some uncontrollable violent state."

Asuka snorted coldly: "Don't worry about it."

She said so, but she was very uneasy in her heart.

Lies don't hurt people, the truth is the sharp knife.

She was a little panicked...

Jon: "Okay, anyway, it's just like that when you talk about teenage boys and girls. As long as you don't make any dramas of youth pain literature, I can support anyone who is with whom. Even if we take a step back, can't we turn the mecha doomsday battle series into a harem campus comedy series? Shinji doesn't want to be the protagonist, and I can only accept you reluctantly."

"Who asked you?" Asuka walked out angrily.

Before leaving, she suddenly turned back and asked curiously: "Do you really have tentacles?"

Jon laughed, and many transparent silk threads came out from his back, wrapped around Asuka's wrists and ankles, and gently lifted the girl up in the air: "Do you think I have tentacles?"

Asuka: "Put me down!"

Jon: "Beg me."

Asuka:...

Okay.

People have to bow their heads under the eaves.

"Please, put me down."

Jon did not make any further excessive demands and let Asuka go.

Asuka cried out "Ouch" and was thrown hard. She glared at Jon.

Jon blew a kiss back.

Asuka: Slipped away~

It's proven.

The life mentor of adolescence should be an unreliable person.

Asuka is fine.

But Shinji ran into trouble.

The next day, the boy pulled a chair and sat opposite Jon: "Mr. Jon, I have some questions that I want to get answers from you."

Jon: "Please, confused boy, I will always be your life mentor."

"Recently, in fact, it was yesterday, that person... Ikari Gendo, went to visit the grave for my mother with me. I can feel that he seems to want to repair the relationship between us. I originally refused, but there was a voice in my heart telling me that it's okay to forgive him and give up hatred. I really don't know what to do. Can you help me?" Shinji grabbed his hair in frustration.

Jon thought for a moment and said, "To be honest, your living father cannot say that he doesn't love you, but he is just like you, at least like you before, he always likes to escape... To put it simply, he doesn't have the natural ability to love people like Jimei. In this world, he only cares about your dead mother, and loving you is a by-product. Can you understand?"

After a moment of silence, he said, "I can understand that you want to forgive him. After all, blood is thicker than water. You beat him so many times, you should have vented your anger. But I still suggest not to forgive him, because he has a purpose to repair the relationship. In other words, if I am not there, he will always regard you as a useful tool and a part of the plan. Do you understand?"

Do you understand? I understand.

Do you understand? I understand.

Shinji nodded: "Hearing what you said, I feel much better."

He looked at Jon with great admiration: "Ah, as expected of you, Mr. Jon, you can always see everything so clearly."

Jon waved his hand: "The majority of netizens have already analyzed your behavioral patterns and mental states badly. I just copied the answers."

Shinji:? ? ?

Can't understand.

But forget it.

That old guy from Ikari Yuantang wants to repair the relationship?

Not that easy!

Shinji is gone.

Then……

Ayanami Rei came in.

She looked at Jon steadily and said softly: "Is this where we have a life-long conversation?"

Jon touched his smooth chin: "I'm thinking, should I charge a fee?"

After hearing this, Ayanami Rei took out a very old wallet from her pocket: "I still have some money here..."

"It's just a joke, why are you taking it so seriously?" Jon waved his hand repeatedly and grabbed a new little frog wallet (the same model as Uzumaki Naruto) from the void: "I'll give it to you."

Ayanami Rei was stunned for a moment, then took it, with a hint of gratitude in her voice: "Thank you."

"It's nothing. For a child like you who lacks love, a little favor is enough to win your favor." Jon extended his hand to invite: "So, what is your trouble?"

Ayanami Rei pondered for a moment and said: "The...meaning of life."

"You little girl, you are already anthropomorphic enough. You don't need to look for the meaning of life." Jon smiled: "I can't give you this answer. When you encounter something you can't understand, just smile."

"Smile?" Ayanami Rei asked.

"Yes, smile, come on, smile now, smile now." Jon said while pulling out a camera from somewhere.

Ayanami Rei smiled and raised the corners of her mouth slightly: "Hey?"

"The smile is so fake." Jon was not very satisfied.

The conversation changed, "Let's do this, Nagato Yuki-san."

"I'm Rei Ayanami."

Jon: "I got it, Tabatha."

"I'm Rei Ayanami."

Jon: "Okay, okay, Icarus."

"I am...forget it, you can call me whatever you want."

Qiao always has invisible magic power in his body, which can trigger the complaint gene hidden in everyone's body.

Ayanami Rei is no exception.

Jon: "If you want to find the meaning of life, it's better to start with small things. For example, my shoulders are very sore. Come over and give me a squeeze."

Ayanami Rei was not fooled.

She just has a cold temper, but she's not really stupid.

This kind of work obviously has nothing to do with the meaning of life.

but.

She didn’t know why, but after talking to Mr. Jon, she felt that she was becoming more and more ‘anthropomorphic’.

Complaining is a great skill, and you need to practice it more in the future.

"Thank you, Mr. Jon." Ayanami Rei stood up and said goodbye: "By the way, today's dinner is hamburger meat."

Jon smiled and said: "From a pure vegetarian to eating everything, to a certain extent, it is already a great victory. And you have never dreamed before, have you started to dream recently? "

Ayanami Rei: "How do you know...but I did start to dream recently."

Jon clapped his hands: "That means you have found the meaning of life, you just don't know it yet."

Hearing this, Ayanami Rei was thoughtful.