I will not die!
Chapter 202
"Fallen."That's all I have to say about the scar on my chest.
"Fallen? How did you fall here?"
"I can’t remember the specifics, I just remember that I accidentally tripped over a chair, and that’s what happened when I got up."I was surprised that I could lie without blushing and my heart not beating. I am obviously very bad at lying.
Ai Li showed a suspicious expression, but did not raise any questions.
"Can I see it again?"she asked
"Um."
Although I agreed readily, when I really wanted to lift up my clothes, I couldn't help but hesitate. After all, it was my first time to take the initiative to show my body to others, so I was inevitably a little ashamed. However, under her burning eyes, I was really embarrassed to refuse again.
I awkwardly lifted my clothes to my chest and looked away, but Alley's eyes were deeply attracted.
"It looks a bit like it has been scratched, very neatly"
"Um……"
"Does it hurt?"
"It doesn't hurt now"
"It hurt a lot at the beginning, right?"
"Um"
"can i touch it"
"……Can."
Her fingers gently brushed over my scar, and an indescribable strange feeling crawled up my back from the place she touched, and then crawled to my scalp. Suddenly, her hand stopped Living
"Here on your chest... why is there a hair that wants to grow a lot?"
The moment Ai Li said this, I subconsciously put down my clothes. Then, the air fell into silence, and she and I stared at each other.
……
"Well, I'm sorry, can I laugh a little bit...Pfft, hahahaha……"
Aren't you already laughing?
"Sorry, sorry, I couldn't help it...Pfft……"
I raised my feet and was about to leave. There was no room for me in this room, but she suddenly held my hand.
"Sorry...cough...I promise not to laugh."
It would be nice if you didn't say this with a suppressed smile.
"I go to the bathroom."I said expressionlessly.
I don't want to talk to her for the time being.
"etc! It's my fault to laugh at you. Although it's somewhat force majeure, it's me who obviously asked to see you. This, this is really shameless!"
It doesn't seem that exaggerated.
"so! In order not to let you suffer! Look at mine too!"As he said that, Alley put his hand on the button on his chest, as if he had made some important decision,"Actually, I also have a mole on my chest! The very small one……" ha! ?
"No, no need!"I declined hastily
"Why? Do you think I'm too young? Yeah!"
"No, it shouldn’t be too small either.……"
"Then why don’t you look at it when I show it to you? Isn’t it the size? Is it the shape? Do you think my shape is not good enough?"
"It’s not a matter of shape……"
So why do I have to watch it? Is it so important not to let me suffer?
"what's the problem"
"Just, why do you have to let me see it?"
"This makes it even, I laughed at you and you laughed at me once"
"I won’t laugh (I can’t even laugh in this situation). And I didn’t take what happened just now to heart."
"So, do you want me to live my whole life full of apologies to you and be obedient to you my whole life?"
Why do you have to apologize for this kind of thing all your life! Seeing her serious face, I can't find any other reasons to refute it.
"Then let’s see"
"Eh...Okay...Um, wait a minute...I, I'll prepare it first……"When I really agreed, she suddenly became nervous. To be honest, I want to laugh now.
"good"
"Ahem, I'm ready."She pretended to be calm and patted her clothes.
"good"
"Then I'll start"
"Um."
Ai Li slowly unbuttoned the top button of her clothes. It was obviously just a very simple action, but she still took half a minute to unbutton it. When she finally unbuttoned it, she had to unbutton the second button. when she suddenly stopped
"do you really want to see it"
"Isn't that what you want me to see?"
Her cheeks turned red, and she whispered something I couldn't hear, and then reluctantly unbuttoned the second button.
This summer is hotter than ever.
The second button was unbuttoned, and then the second button was unbuttoned. The third one, if you just look at it, it is more than enough to untie the above three, and at this moment, she stopped again
"Otherwise, forget it."She said softly. At this moment, her face was as red as a ripe apple. This was by no means a metaphor, but really like an apple. People couldn't help but want to take a bite.
"good……"
"ha! This is what you said, you can't go back on it!"She sat down on the bed with a snap, propped up her body with two arms, and swung her long legs back and forth happily.
In just a moment, she seemed to be a different person, and the embarrassment just now was gone.
I took a long breath, sat back on the bed and held my forehead, saying,"I never regret it."
The movements on Ai Li's legs suddenly stopped. She turned around and looked at me. Her hands were placed on her legs at some point. She lowered her head slightly and put her eyes on the two unruly hands.
"Then if I marry you, you won’t regret it"
"Um……"
"Um?"I looked at her and took two seconds to think about whether I had just heard something wrong.
"This is what you said……"This time, she lowered her head completely, and the familiar red color spread from her face to her ears.
"I...well……"
We just sat quietly like this, no one spoke, the air was so quiet that we could hear each other's heartbeats. I really like this kind of silence, but at this moment, I hope something can break this tranquility.
"Guangyuan, can you just look at me?"The tranquility was broken, but I fell into greater embarrassment and fear.
At this moment, a piece of pure music that I often listen to,"Love and Hope" seemed to sound in my ears. Although this song was scratched It's pure music, but there are a few vocal lyrics at the end, and the lyrics go like this.
Love is a curse, hope is a disease.
I am the child of the curse, and I am terminally ill.
But I am here, but I am here.
"I am here……"
……
"What would you do if the world suddenly ended that day? asked Alley
"What should you do?"
"Sure enough, I knew you would say that."Ai Li threw a peanut into her mouth, and the peanut made a crisp sound in her mouth,"Guess what I will do."
I thought for a moment and said sheepishly:"Be with me...……"
"You guessed it!"She twisted a peanut and put it on my lips. I held it with my lips and put it into my mouth. When I bit it with my teeth, the peanut made a crisp sound and the saltiness was just right.
"another one. Oh, what if the zombie virus breaks out and I become a zombie in front of you?"
"run"
"What if I run to a dead end?"
"Find a way to get rid of you and keep running"
"What if you can't get rid of it, or you can't run anymore!"
I thought for a moment and said:"I'll fight with you."
"……"
Alley looked at me directly, and kept putting peanuts in his mouth. I felt awkward, so I looked at Xia Shu who was sleeping with her two front legs next to me. Suddenly, she screamed and rushed towards me. Come over and hold me down
"Don't you want to fight with me?"
A few strands of her long hair fell on my face. It was slippery and itchy.
"I can't move"
"Then I'm going to eat you"
"……"
She opened her mouth slightly and kept moving her head closer to me. I tried to imagine her as a zombie. Looking at the white teeth in her mouth, I imagined that it was a weapon that would kill me. If I wanted to resist, I wouldn't be able to resist, but What to do next, kill her or run away? trouble.
Forget it.
She bit it and lightly touched my neck with her lips. After about four or five seconds, she raised her head again and looked at me and said,"You're dead.""
"……Um."
By the way, we were playing truth or dare, but as we played, it became all about me answering and taking risks.
Getting married.
This was something I never dared to think about before, even if it was Now, I still feel unbelievable.
After we got married, our lives didn't change much, but this is probably because we didn't tell anyone, and we didn't hold any ceremony. We just went to get the certificate. After all, the earth The Unification and Union Law does not stipulate that those things must be fixed when getting married. This is our mutual decision, but it is mainly mine. I don’t know how to share it with others. When I think of the looks they may cast and suspicion, I feel very scared.
We still go to work together, go home together, eat together, play games together, and watch TV together every day, just like before, like countless ordinary couples in the world.
However, in this stable and harmonious daily life There is a dangerous bomb hidden underneath. I know where it is, but I can’t clear it.
Because that bomb is me.
I have been so intimate with loneliness for a long time that I no longer know how to say goodbye to it.
And Ai The longer we are together with Alley, the more irresistible it becomes to me.
It has exposed its fangs and is ready to kill me at any time.
At the same time, until now, I dare not make any promises to Alley. It is true that , I don’t hate being with her, but I have never liked anyone, nor been liked by anyone. Even if I do now, I don’t know if I can really like her.
I have tried countless times Imagine that if I were suddenly killed, what would the world after my death be like? The ending would be business as usual. But recently, my imaginary ending suddenly changed. The reason for the change was Alley. My death is sad, and my future life will take a huge turn. However, when I reversely imagine what my world would be like if Alley died suddenly, there is only one ending I can think of.
Everything is business as usual.
Generally speaking, If the person I love dies, I should at least be sad. If I can't even be sad, then according to common sense, I'm afraid I can't even be considered a human being.
I don't dare to think about it anymore. Because I’m so afraid that I even want to beg God for help.
Does God like anyone? If the person He likes dies, will He be sad? If God loves everyone in the world, wouldn’t He be sad all the time? ? If He will not be sad because of this, does He really love the world? Or does He only love a very few people, or only grieve for a very few people?
If God can be sad, then His sadness What is it like?
In the past, many myths regarded rainfall as caused by the tears of gods. Do gods really shed tears?
How is a god who sheds tears different from a human being? Wouldn’t he seek help from a higher-level god?
No. Will it happen or not?
I have obviously lost interest in God for a long time, but recently I keep having irrelevant associations. What’s wrong with me? Could it be that, subconsciously, I also feel that everything I do now is worshiping God? Is it a gift? After all, my father and mother have prayed for me for so long...
With their level of piety, it should be enough.
What about me? I have never prayed devoutly, but I am a blessed person who enjoys the prayers of others..
Where will I go? god……
……
One early morning, Alley and I were on our way to the company when a phone call suddenly came through. Since it was not marked as an advertisement, we answered it. After answering the call, I stood still for a few seconds. Alley was puzzled. He looked at me and asked me what was wrong.
I put down my phone and said calmly
"I'm going to take a day off."
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