Reborn since 2005

Chapter 20 Is this the real strong man?

In addition to some unnecessary descriptions of the environment, Yan Xin also pointed out several minor problems in this chapter.

For example, the villain's ridicule to the protagonist is too tactful, and sometimes you need to think about it to understand what he means, which is not conducive to stimulating emotions.

The taunting can be made more direct.

There is also the kind of villain's face that flatters the superior and suppresses the inferior, which is more obvious.

"This...isn't this a bit unreasonable?" Chen Li hesitated, "No matter how useless the protagonist is, he is still the son of the patriarch. The people in the family have said too much. Don't you have to worry about being put in the shoes of the patriarch?"

Although he is young, he is still someone who has worked for a few months and knows a little about the ways of the world.

"So, this is the reason why you rush to the street," Yan Xin said. "If you think too much and are too considerate, you will lose the energy, cannot stir up emotions, and cannot arouse the resonance of readers."

"Yes...really?" Chen Li became unsure of himself.

Yan Xin said to him earnestly: "The selling point of this book is the passion, which is to trample under your feet those who once looked down on you, and to blow the heads of all your enemies. If you can't bring up the hatred, the pleasure of being slapped in the face will be gone.

, the whole book just doesn’t have that flavor anymore.”

"What you said makes sense..." Chen Lida said.

Then he asked: "But if you really don't follow the logic of reality, is this okay?"

"There is no need to be so forward-thinking and timid," Yan Xin said. "This book pursues the passion of young people, which means that most of the audience is middle school students. They are the age when they flout all rules. Why would they care about this? As long as it feels good enough.

That’s it!”

Chen Li was convinced by him and said: "Then I will change it!"

According to Yan Xin's opinions, further modifications were made.

Yan Xin saw that he was still thinking about the words he used, sometimes changing them over and over again just to fix a word, so he added:

"It's not necessary for you. There is no need to drag out the text. As long as you can express what you mean, don't show off your vocabulary. This is not a place worth wasting time. If you can express it simply, don't go around. Yes.

If you use common words to express something, don’t use uncommon words.”

Chen Li was a little embarrassed: "I want to give readers the feeling that I am very cultured..."

"It's not necessary," Yan Xin said, "It's like cooking. The story is the ingredients, the rhythm is the heat, and the writing is just the seasoning. It's okay to add a little seasoning appropriately, but you can't let the flavor of the seasoning cover the ingredients.

This is the taste of indifference. And the main audience of your novel is middle school students. Why do you show off your vocabulary? Do you still expect a group of people to read your novel while looking up the dictionary? How tiring that would be

ah!"

The more Chen Li thought about it, the more it made sense: "You're right, I made a mistake. I want to correct this problem."

Yan Xin was very pleased and patted him on the shoulder: "Just think about it. Literary youth is a disease, and Internet article writers must not catch it."

Chen Li looked at Yan Xin and had a strange feeling in his heart:

"Although this man is younger than me, when he talks to me, I always feel like an experienced elder is educating me - how does he understand so well?"

"Could this be the real strong man?"

Yan Xin was a little creeped out by what he saw, so he laughed dryly and said: "Well, you can continue to revise it. I will take a look at it later and send it out if it feels right."

Before leaving, I would like to encourage Chen Li:

"Actually, you have already written this very well. If you just send it out like this, you should get good results. But I think you can do better, so the requirements will be higher. This is our first collaborative project, so it must be

It was an instant hit.”

I went outside and breathed fresh air for another twenty minutes before going in.

At this time, Chen Li has completed the revision of the first chapter and is now looking for typos.

Yan Xin also followed over to take a look.

This time, the feelings that made him unhappy were gone, there were no unnecessary descriptions, and the hatred value was full.

Chen Li still has some writing skills.

According to his self-introduction, he started learning to write novels when he was in high school. After graduating from high school, he did not go out to work immediately. Instead, he wrote novels at home for more than a year and submitted articles to some literary journals. During this period, he also published several short stories.

In total, I earned more than 2,000 yuan in royalties.

It was also at that time that I wrote the online novel. During the serialization period, dozens of people praised it, but the data was too low and it could not even meet the standards for publication, so I had to give up in the end.

It's not that he has strong writing skills, but he has reached a qualified level.

The shortcoming is that I have read too many martial arts novels in the past, and I have been affected by the world view of those martial arts novels. The plot is old-fashioned and I can't write anything new.

I am a young man, but my consciousness is in a world view that is already outdated.

In addition, I still have a bit of a literary problem, and I want to show my literary talent and show that I am different from ordinary Internet writers and have more depth to them.

This kind of thinking makes his novels particularly awkward and fails to gain an audience.

Now, after Yan Xin's advice, I know how to write a good online novel and give up those superfluous ideas, and the writing suddenly becomes smoother.

Yan Xin had read so many online novels in his previous life, and knew that the most suitable writing style for online writing is the kind that makes people unaware of the writing style. What can stay in the reader's heart is only the plot of the story, the emotions and emotions of the characters.

Now, at least in this first chapter, Chen Li has done it.

As a person involved, he could not objectively evaluate which one was better, the first chapter or the first chapter of the original work, but he could see that this was an excellent beginning.

"What do you think?"

After Yan Xin finished reading, Chen Li asked with some anxiety.

Now when he faced Yan Xin, he felt some inexplicable awe.

He felt that this young man understood Internet writing and was much better than himself in this aspect.

This young man's opinion is very important.

Yan Xin gave him a thumbs up: "This beginning is indispensable for at least a masterpiece. If future chapters can stabilize the level of this chapter, there will be a place for you in the shrine of online literature."

Chen Li felt relieved.

This evaluation was so high that it even made him feel dizzy with happiness.

Said: "Then, just send it?"

"Send it!" Yan Xin said firmly.

Chen Li moved the mouse to the release area and looked at Yan Xin on the right side: "Is it really posted?"

Yan Xin: "Fat!"

Click the mouse and publish.

Yan Xin checked the time, it was 2:24 in the morning on August 12, 2005.

He said to Chen Li:

"You have to remember this time. This time represents an important milestone in online writing."

Chen Li laughed dryly: "It's not that exaggerated, right?"

"It's such an exaggeration!" Yan Xin said with certainty.